Welcome to TRIPLE RECAP WEDNESDAY! I am going to try to do all three but we shall see how it goes. I did get a TON of sleep last night so that is good. First up is the RHOBH recap. This is BY FAR the most popular recap. So it wasn’t an easy decision not to do one last week. I just was not doing well. So let’s see what tonight’s show brings! And thank you all for sticking with me through my many physical and emotional issues lately. I am trying to yank myself out of the hole. Now let’s do this!
Hell I don’t even know who I like on the show. It’s probably just Sutton and Garcelle. At least neither of them are facing charges. You know what I can live without? Going to a teeth cleaning with Paul and Dorit. This is a big NOPE for me. No one needs to see the old shitty teeth or the new ones. I’m going to have to pause this because, NOPE! Dorit has a charity finally. It is for homeless people in need of dental care. It’s about time!
Thankfully, Sutton meets up with the wallpaper that is Crystal. Seriously. Why is she even on this show. Between her ugly leather pants and her eating disorder… these are not things I care about. Sorry. We already have the eating disorder slot filled by Rinna who won’t admit to it. I can live with this. Rinna is just not over the fact that Sutton outed her and Harry for going to the Elton John benefit on her dime. She should have just said THANK YOU. Crystal is over people for judging her for her eating disorder. I know it hard to struggle with any medical issue and people have a shit ton of “advice” that feels like pressure.
Diana’s boytoy is getting a lot of air time with his singing. I am not mad about that he is VERY good. I just wish it didn’t involve Diana who I hate with all my peepee. Sorry, that was something I said as a child and have no idea why it i coming out over a half a century later. Diana is just horrid and I have no idea what it must take for him to lay down with her. He can stay and she needs to go. Google says Diana is 49. I do not believe that.
Let’s Stretch It Out!
Kyle and Erika meet with a trainer to get stretched out. I am so disappointed in Kyle for supporting this criminal. I am really starting to worry that Mauricio and maybe even her are complicit in the whole sham. Mauricio actually has issues of his own that are not shown on the show. Why do they have to do this assisted stretching thing on a tennis court. Erika says she loves pain. Kyle says she has hypermobility syndrome. That is why she can always do the splits. This was a scene that should have been on the cutting room floor. I’m bored. I really could care less if Erika is fucking or not. And why does Kyle need to throw Sutton and Garcelle under the bus.
Everyone gets ready to go to Dorit’s charity event for “Homeless not Toothless.” I mean it’s great dentists are helping the homeless. But, may shelter might be the first priority? Paul (he is going by PK on this show) but that is not his fucking name. He’s dodging lawsuits of his own, ALLEGEDLY. Erika is coming in her hooker shoes. Kathy is there! Erika and Rinna arrive together and both look gorgeous. Rinna’s dress is …interesting. I’m not sure if I love it or hate it. But, It’s A LOT.
Homeless Not Toothless
Could there possibly be a worse name for a charity? The dentist has NINE KIDS through sperm donations. That is weird, right? Paul is giving Mauricio expensive gifts. Things that make you go HMMMMMM. Even Kyle is wondering about it. Paul is also claiming that he had dinner with John Legend and Lionel Richie on the night he got the DUI. Sutton is the only one to bring a gift. But it is olive oil and oregano for the chef. A southern women never goes to any event without a gift for the
hostess um…. chef? Rinna fake kisses Sutton. Not a fan of the chains on Garcelle’s dress.
Kathy Hilton is on WWHL tonight, FYI. I do not understand this setup. It’s really tacky. Dorit talks about her charity. Kyle continues to throw Sutton under the bus. She is such a cunt. Rinna is such a cunt. I wish these two could leave Sutton alone for five minutes at CHARITY EVENT! Thank God for Melissa Etheridge shows up to sing. I love her and she saved this show. Also, does anyone believe the rumor that Dorit and Mauricio are hooking up? I don’t. Everyone fangirls out over Melissa Etheridge. Rinna says she doesn’t want to fight with Sutton anymore. He mother’s belongings just arrived two months after her death. Also she waited SEVEN MONTHS to bury her. Rinna apologizes to Sutton FINALLY.
This was a good episode because, MELISSA ETHERIDGE! On to Dubai!