How did this Summer House recap come up so fast? What a week. Praying for world peace whilst watching vapid people in toxic relationships is wild. Yet here we are. Danielle, Paige and Ciara are still pondering how to tell Amanda that Kyle doesn’t like her. Lol not exactly that, but mostly. Kyle saying that they only have Loverboy in common was a lot for the girls to process. Kyle asks Robert how he and Danielle manage to fight and get over it. Robert says it’s because they actually want to be together. Luke’s room is turned into a red room sex dungeon, minus the sex. Kyle is such a funny drunk. He walks around talking to food, talks to himself. He trips and warns production to “watch out for that hill”. When he’s alone, he’s entertaining. When he and Amanda argue incessantly, it’s exhausting.
Drinking Should Be Fun
On the other spectrum, Paige is not fun. She lays in bed arguing with Craig. She told Craig that she and Andrea made out at the bondage party. Craig manipulates the fuck out of her. She ends up in tears because Craig is the only one who can sleep around, damn it! The girls rally and console her. Ciara speaks for all of us when she says FUCK CRAIG. Wasted tears are shed anyway. She distances herself from Andrea as Craig’s manipulation works. Poor Andrea is confused. He really likes Paige. He doesn’t understand why she’s all of a sudden so distant. As we all know, Paige and Craig end up together. It’s all moot now but I can’t be the only one who is frustrated by her. How does she choose Craig when she has a hot model who delivers coffee to her every morning? I’ll never get it.
The next day, the girls lay out by the pool. They tell Amanda about what Kyle said to Danielle. Amanda makes excuses for it, but you can see how hurt she is. Mya cries while telling Amanda she’s been where she is. Mya is so much happier now that she and Kwame aren’t together. She knows there’s more out there. The girls cover Amanda in support. They don’t attack her or make her feel like she has to choose. Even with all that support, she still chooses to stay in a bad relationship. Kyle sees that the girls are talking so he comes out to do damage control. Paige points out that the day of the wedding won’t change anything. Ciara, through tears, wants Kyle and Amanda to think about what is going on in their relationship. Kyle seems truly baffled that people are concerned about them. Dear God.
Birthday Tantrums Are Not Fun
In the city, Lindsay begins the process of freezing her eggs. She has the eggs of a 28 year old! Whoo hoo! Carl has a date. We don’t have to worry about that because we know Carl ends up with Lindsay. Kyle calls his mom for some relationship advice before the wedding. She tells him she was topless in Greece 6 weeks before her wedding. Not super helpful Mama Kyle! Carl hosts a birthday party for Kyle’s birthday. It looks like a super nice rooftop venue. The whole cast shows up, plus blast from Summer House past Everett. Everyone has a great time. Until Kyle gives a toast. He tells the group that he wants everyone to rally around him and Amanda, not voice concerns. Blind loyalty at all costs people! Amanda is horrified. She walks away embarrassed. Not her first (and definitely not her last) time doing that.
On the next Summer House recap: Austen and Craig come to the house. Ciara and Austen hook up. Lindsay and Austen hook up. GROSS. Lindsay and Carl are on WWHL! They look HOT. Lindsay seems so chill and happy. They are super cute together. Nothing is really said. Andy tries to have them shade their castmates but they somehow maneuver away from it. They’re in love and happy. That’s the summation. Thank you as always for reading. I always look forward to seeing your comments and interacting with you there. See you in the comments! THANK YOU for all your support. See you in the comments!