Since Project Runway has ended, I have time to write a slightly more timely MAFS recap. I love this show! And I really hope this is the last time I see Alyssa on the show. If I recall correctly, she pulled a Hollywood storm out when she was on the Afterparty Show. By the way, Keshia Knight Pulliam is fantastic as the new host. She asks THE QUESTIONS! Anyway besides having two very angry body parts in different locations, the dog that is super bossy lately, The CBB live feeds, and trying to suffer through Nene Leakes cohosting The Real this week, I really need this show tonight. Now, let’s get on with Alyssa being a cunt. I need to get some kinda feelings out tonight. .
Alyssa & Chris
I have NEVER heard someone say over and over that they are “a good person.” I have never said that in all of the eleventy billion years of my life. I’d like to think I’m a good person. But, I can also be an awful person. I’m mostly a crazy person. A depressed person, and anxious person, a fun person, a generous person, a rude person, a stingy person. You never know what you are going to get. I will be sipping my Cabernet every time this bitch says she is a good person though, because I see no redeeming qualities in her. I feel so sorry for Chris. He is adorable, has a good job, is patient and kind. Alyssa should never have been chosen for this show.
Alyssa and Chris go on a tennis date. I hate her so much. She is wearing flip flops to play tennis? Then she goes barefoot. God, I hate this women. Chris tries to talk about committing to the process and my TV cuts out for her stupid response. Apparently, Alyssa wants to move into the apartment without Chris. She is so there just for the show. Yet, she doesn’t seem to understand what the show is all about. Production tries to explain to her that she can’t be on the show if she doesn’t move in with her husband. That is the whole point!
God I hate this cunt. She is so dumb. How can anyone be this stupid? Did she just say to the producers, “If you can’t be kind don’t talk to me?” She is literally the worst person in the world. Or maybe the second after Trump. Both are narcissists. I have no words that are not hateful. She is so disgusting! How could anyone be with her?
And Yet It Continues
I cannot tell you how much I hate this human. She’s “sick of trying” and sick of being positive? I’m not sure she knows what those words mean. Did ALL OF FUCKING AMERICA miss the part where she tried and was positive? I’m a good person? NOE! NOE! YOU ARE NOT! YOU SUCK! AND SHE THINKS SHE IS A GOOD PERSON? I AM SORRY FOR THE ALL CAPS BUT I NEED HER TO JUST GO AWAY. NO ONE NEEDS TO BE WITH THIS BITCH. She feels like she is pretty. LOL. She is DELUSIONAL. She is literally the ugliest person on earth on the inside. Did she just tell production that she has been “NOTHING BUT NICE TO HIM?” Dear Lord, is she on drugs? What is wrong with this woman?
She wanted the apartment. Not the husband. She is furious that does not get the apartment. God Lord, her husband is a realtor. She could pick her own home. Yet, she tells the producers that she needs the apartment when he likely has a great house? So annoys me so much. The producers are like either you move in with him or you don’t. She meets with some of the other women and shares here bullshit. Chris meets with the other girls. Lindsey and Mark both take up for Chris. She needs to go. The girls don’t think she is giving him a chance. I don’t think she ever had a chance with him. She is awful. I have always thought she was poor.
— Married At 1st Sight (@MAFSLifetime) February 10, 2022
Noi & Steve
I love these two so much. These two are going to a river with rapids, to swim? Isn’t that what the ocean is for? Ah! It is a rain forest. Steve loves exploring and Noi does not. Does she even know how to swim? I like that she is trusting him. She feels safe and loved with him. I AM ONLY CRYING BECAUSE I AM A HOT MESS! They had a great time.
Lindsey & Mark
I am shocked that these two are doing so well but also very happy for them. Mark apologizes to Lindsey for upsetting their romantic date. I think Mark saying that he wanted to move slow was sensible. Okay, I’m pausing because I AM NOT CRYING. YOU ARE. But, really the praying together made me sob. I’m crying at the drop of a hat these days, don’t mind me. They discuss church for the kids. They are both down with it. Then, they start talking about babies. These are all very good signs.
Oh no! Mark’s “mother figure” is calling him for money for rent? Maybe? Multiple times a day. ON. HIS. Honeymoon. Both, Lindsey and Mark have less than perfect mothers. So this is very sad. They go for a massage date to try to relax and forget his troubles. It is so sad to me that hey are troubled by their mothers. I was the baby and the favorite and my mother was still a enigma to me. She was very old school and I am just like her. Apparently his mother figure is the owner of his home. She kept texting him that cats would not be allowed while he was on the honeymoon. I hate cats but cats love me just to annoy me. So she is going to evict him? Lindsey says he can move in with her. I love her.
Katina & Olajuwon
These two go out horseback riding. Neither has ever done it before. It’s cute. When I was living in Libya lots of people had those very expensive Arabian horses. But, when you contract was up, you had to do something with your horses. I’d been invited out to ride a few times. I was very nervous. So some family was headed back to the US and wanted to give their horse to me. My parents declined. 🙁 I could have been a horse person! Now I don’t see myself ever doing that again. Sorry. I bought wine today. #LooseLips
Katina says she is not an animal person. Neither was I until someone broke into my house. I got a big puppy. I don’t know how I would have survived my life without him. Katina hates the whole experience. They argue. But apparently, it turned out okay.
Jasmina & Michael
Oddly we didn’t get to see their date together. But we do have a double date of the two of them going out with Katina and Olajuwon. This is a whole “the experts” got it right. I left this situation earlier but Jasmina doesn’t seem to get it. He is sharing,
HOW WILL SHE GET THE APPARTMENT IF SHE LEAVES?
The group gets together. They talk about having kids. They talk about having communication problems in the marriage. It seems we have four good marriages and then there is the cuntsatchel. Alyssa and Mark are not good. Alyssa wants to have the apartment for first half and he can have it the second half. LOL . o bitch you are gone. Mark says he never heard that and he is either all in or all out.. Then we have another flat chested person saying she is a good person. And I know that my commenting rules say do not disparage another person’s body but she is so evil!
No one likes Alyssa. I wish Chris would stand up and say “I have done everything for this bitch.” Worst season ever with regard to harming a person .Everyone thinks Alyssa is a moron. Alyssa just wants to be on the show. Chris gets it. God I hate this woman. Chris is a great catch and she is a horrible person. Oh Iove him for telling he to keep the apartment. She is LITERALY the worst person in the world. At this point I would like to point out that she is wearing a bra with a blue jean jacket over her. AND SHE STILLL feels like she is someone special? She went on a TV show where everyone hates her! GDIAF. BYEEEEEE!