Merry Christmas everyone one! Once again I slept the day away and am just now waking up. At this rate, I’m never going to get to go get my booster shot! My email inbox is bulging. So, if I haven’t gotten back to you, it may be a while. Sorry. For some reason, I didn’t think I had a RHOC recap to do tonight. This despite Nanette reminding me of what was and what not airing this week. My brain can recall information these days.
It seems that Below Deck and RHOC are the only two Bravo shows airing this week. It’s no coincidence they are currently the top two shows on Bravo. Below Deck has at least twice the viewership of most Bravo shows. That’s no surprise. But, I am shocked by RHOC ratings especially in the coveted 18-49 demo (0.955 million viewers 0.32 18-49 demo) for last week. Looks like we are stuck with Heather Dubrow. UGH. I feel like I’m going to feel sorry for Shannon Beador this season. And that hasn’t happened, well oddly, since last time Heather was on tormenting her.
Jen invites Heather over to her house. Heather shows up with champagne. I love that Jen forces Heather to go on a guided tour of her house. Heather learns that Ryne never wears a shire. We learn that Jen and Ryne got letters from their school because Ryne wasn’t wearing a shirt to drop off the kids. Who cares? They live at the beach. Finally, we move on to the more serious topic of plastic surgery. They move on to Heather’s dinner party that turned in to Heather’s meltdown. Heather says she has forgiven Gina. But, she is already campaigning against Shannon Beador. Because, Heather.
Meanwhile, Nicole and Noella head out for some day drinking to talk about Noella’s divorce. Noella should be married to Ryne. She doesn’t like to wear clothes either and rarely has any on for her Instagram looks. That would be a match made in heaven if either of them had their own money. Noella arrives crying and says that the divorce papers were served by a process server who threw the divorce papers at her mother face and left. #classy She has no idea where her husband is. Um, he’s in Puerto Rico with his other family. Later, Noella talked to her mother who apparently lives with her about the divorce. Her mother is also shocked. Noella still has hope in her marriage.
Noella kicks back some tequila. Her husband is not picking up her calls. Noella asks Nicole for a hug multiple times before she relents and hugs the drunk girl who is sobbing in pubic. Nicole wears too much makeup. She is ready to bail. Nicole wants to get the drama out of the bar. Noella tells us that Nicole isn’t the kind of friend she needs right now. Well, didn’t you just meet her yesterday and she is supposed to hug the crying drunk girl in the middle of restaurant for uncomfortable amounts of time? She’s trying to get her off the cameras for her own good!
Meanwhile, Shannon’s boyfriend Steve and daughter Stella are not in the fish and cheese (ew) business. This is not good for Stella. Or Steve. Shannon is still complaining about her settlement from David. Let me remind you of how much she got. I’m trying to feel sorry for you Shannon, but this is not helping.
The Shannon Takedown Continues
Emily, Gina, and their partners go out to dinner together. Basically, they gossip about the party, and Noella’s soon to be ex ambulance chaser husband. Emily sheds light on reasons why the ambulance chaser filed for divorce in Puerto Rico. They make a lot of sense. You can’t shut off credit cars in California. And California is also a 50/50 state. Gina and Emily are both all the way over Shannon. Shane begs them to please not bring this up at the party. Oh Shane, that is the whole reason for the party. Did you really think it was about you?
Shannon takes Stella to Dr. Moon about a volleyball injury. Stella has anger in her liver. And it is about her dad. She seems to upset that her father is not sending enough money. I doubt she knows how much she got. She seems alienated from her father. She is worried about her mother. In advance of Emily’s party, Shannon chats with Noella on the phone. She reads Heather’s stupid super long, condescending text to Shannon. Shannon says she is going to apologize AGAIN to Heather. We get a whole reel of Shannon’s past apologies to Heather.
Heather and Nicole and their partners ride to the event together. Heather of course serves champagne in the car. Nicole tells Heather that Noella’s husband has left her, filed for divorce, and gone MIA. Then, she tells Heather that Nicole called her a fake bitch. Oh, Nicole. You are a shit stirrer. You have to have done something worse than this to get the ax. Everyone knows Heather is a fake bitch. Perhaps we will see what you did at this event. Oh Lord, Shane’s parents are there. Could these women please behave? Wait! Noella only got married in 2020? This should be an annulment not a divorce. Heather, the fake bitch, hugs and housewife kisses Noella and consoles her about her divorce. And, she brought her a gift. Hmmm.
Noella was not impressed by Dr. Jen’s housewife greeting. Was the hug not long enough? Emily subtly coaches Heather to not be a bitch to Shannon when she arrives. And just like that, Shannon arrives. Suddenly, it is Emily who is coming after Shannon at her husband’s event. So when this implodes, it’s on Emily. Then, Emily drags Heather over to back her up on what Shannon said to her about her being untrustworthy. Now, suddenly, Emily tells Noella that she wants to support her and that she is all she thinks about. When Emily wakes up in the morning, she thinks of Noella, in bed at night she thinks of Noella. What is wrong with Emily this season?
Shannon and Heather go outside for another chance for Shannon to cry and apologize, and kiss Heather’s ring. Heather says “If you ever come after me or my family again, you are going to lose a lot more than just my friendship. This will cost a lot. And, I’m not saying this as a threat. I’m saying it as a promise.” WOW.
Next week: We are off to the races, literally. Noella lets everyone know she can’t stand Dr. Jen. See you then!