I almost deleted tonight’s show from my DVR. Not because we don’t seem to care very much about this show, and we don’t. But, Bravo insists on naming it RHOA so it will record. I’ve never seen a spin-off named that way. It does seem to be helping a bit though with the ratings. I still can’t believe that the Bravo Suits, and MY SOURCE were very pleased with this season. But the ratings seem high enough for a second season. Lord knows, Kim Biermann’s show was kept on forever. I have to admit I liked Kim’s show. It was unintentionally hilarious. Apologies for the lack of relevant photos. I’m having an issue with pulling and have too many other things going on right now to fuck with it. But I thought y’all would appreciate this Mama Gina goes all housewives photo. Now, on with the Porsha’s Family Matters recap.
We start with Lauren, one of the real stars of this show. The other one is Dennis. Who of thunk it? LOL. Porsha and Lauren’s cousin Londie comes to visit Lauren. They talk about how everyone was praising Dennis at the reunion. I can’t keep these people straight in my head. It’s like the first episode of Project Runway or Survivor, but it doesn’t get easier from week to week because nobody gets voted off. Basically, this ridiculously fast engagement has both families struggling to understand it.
There seems to be a consensus that Dennis is hurt and more of the family members like him than Simon. We also learn about the title of this episode. Denise still has a Versace robe and a couple of other items that he wants returned to him. Lauren and Londie plan to find them and use the return of them to get him to agree on the trip. Come on, we all know Dennis is not going to give up any camera time.
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Porsha’s sister Lauren and cousin Londie involve Lauren W., Porsha’s assistant in their plan to steal two Versace robes and some designer jumpsuit that belongs to Dennis from the house. This feels VERY produced. Londie forgot to wear pants to this caper. This will literally be the storyline for this episode. UGH.
Breakfast Of Losers
Did Porsha just tell her mama that she wants Dennis to get to know Simon so they could all co-parent? I thought Porsha’s original story was that she met Simon through Dennis!??? Porsha’s mama doesn’t care for Mama Gina. Why is Porsha wearing gloves to cook a “Nigerian breakfast”? Simon comes down for breakfast. Again it is way over produced. Lauren and Londie go to Dennis’s hookah bar to return his stuff and “convince him” to go on the trip we all know he is going on. I’m bored.
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Next we get a lot of the usual ridiculous packing for the trip. I find it hard to believe these people travel in their real lives and take eleventy billion pieces of luggage. I generally don’t even check anything. Then again, I’ve been in my reindeer pants for at least a week now. What? Where I am going? No where. We move on to Mama Gina telling Simon that Mama Dianne told her that Porsha cheated on Dennis. Mama Diane denies it. I see where Porsha gets her lying genes from. Porsha was recently claiming her book was sold out in LA. But the book had not even been released yet.
Just Kill Me Now
We are going to be fighting over this robe for the entire hour. Just give the man his clothes. Porsha is bringing a male “assistant” named Dom on a family vacation. Because her entire family is not enough support? Porsha’s mother said she is too sick to come. Mayan dancers meet them at the hotel and try to cleanse them. There is not enough smoke in the world. Dennis is pissed that he is in a three bedroom suite with Lauren and Londie. Lauren’s suite is amazing. Dennis calls his ho of the week who is apparently coming down the next day. That’s sure to cause issues with Lauren. Why? Because apparently that is what the script says.
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Also, I was not paying attention to how they got there, but my source claims that Simon paid for a lot of private jets this season. Mexico looks beautiful. I’ve only been to Acapulco with my parents. We were always on a budget. Daddy never wanted to go. Mama was upset by all the kids who were alone and homeless and had one in particular she wanted to take home. I met a little local girl on the beach who I exposed to my Cosmo magazine and probably damaged her for life. I used to eat fried fish on the beach everyday. It was on this trip that I learned I do not care for most authentic Mexican food.
Anyway, they do this bullshit meditation thing. The robe situation comes up and it is utterly ridiculous. How the hell is this show getting higher ratings than RHOSLC? HOW?
It’s so weird. Why did Porsha drop everything else for this? The producers are NOT sparing her. They totally don’t mind exposing her for ratings.
On that note, are they really that happy with the ratings? So far, it’s lower than RHONY! If the Comcast suits didn’t hesitate to put RHONY “on pause” for dropping so low, I’m scratching my head on why they’d consider giving Porsha a second season for similarly bad numbers (at least by RHOA standards).
These little spin off shows are MUCH cheaper to produce, film for less than a month usually and are considered filler. When it comes to my site, I put things up all the time when there is nothing to recap and sometimes those posts do really well and are better than having nothing to post. It always surprises me what does and doesn’t take.
But 777,0000 is more than LOTS of other bravo shows, as I said including RHOSLC. The only Bravo show that consistently gets over a million followers is Below Deck. Summer house, Vanderpump Rules ,Winter House etc don’t get these ratings. Bravo is TANKING.
RHOA on the last season barely cleared a million views last season for most episodes.
Agree. Show is tired!!! Portia is and always drama. She never feel anything is ever her fault. She wants to be in control no matter what. I think the retreat was a waste cause she didn’t benefit from it. Hope this show gets canceled. After last 2 episodes I am done watching it and I’m sure others are as well
Maybe THE SOURCE thought it was good because RHOA set the bar so low last season. 💤 💤 💤
That pic of Mama Gina? It’s another ‘nude illusion’ fail, right? That poor woman. I bet the dress in normal light is not see through down to the top of her stomach. This has occurred on the Potomac reunion with Karen Huger, if memory serves, these ladies need to be aware of what can happen with studio lighting. Also, I know this is blasphemy, and I’ve just returned from a Latin requiem mass for an older relative, but I’m actually enjoying this show more than Below Deck – I’m going to duck for cover now. And, I love Captain Lee, it’s not about him!
Oh QueenJen… I don’t think there was any allusion involved. And this show is in no way better than Below Deck. But there are plenty of people watching. RHOSLC is so interesting this season. I can’t imagine why some people tune out before it comes on after this nonsense. I am just trying to stay alive until it is over and I can get to RHOSLC.
Loving RHOSLC. But I’m not really looking forward to seeing the cast forced to interact with the latest felon by Bravo. I mean Jen Shah, I forgot there are 2 in that cast! It’s going to be so awkward, but I’m here for it. Wow, I thought SLC was doing really well! And I love Below Deck, always have, just not keen on this season’s crew so much. BD is a game changer in the reality world imo, and should be getting Emmys for some of the incredible photography/ scenery. I guess it’s drone cams, but I love those overhead and underwater ocean shots in particular
St Kitts in quite pretty. My parents were born there and much of the family on my mother’s side still resides there. I’m surprised I don’t see much monkeys which inhabit the island often.
See? This is why I decided I don’t want to live on the beach in Costa Rica! MONKEYS ARE A HARD NO. Along with certain birds. Portugal, here I come!
Oh and the wine in Portugal is excellent and inexpensive.
This is a trainwreck
I feel like I am losing brain cells talking about this damn robe. Dennis can afford another robe and Porsha wants to keep his sweaty old robe for what reason. The fact they had like 5 scenes about it was killing me. It feels super contrived but not in a good way. If you have ever seen Chrisley knows best on USA (Bravo has been running reruns of it a lot over the summer) this has the same feel, but not positive. Really corny contrived storyline about family misadventures. You can tell the only idea they could come up with is this robe drama. They must be prompting Dennis to talk about the robe because since episode 1 he has been talking about it.
I really like Dennis, Mama Gina, and Londie.
They showed footage of a Delta plane taking off and landing so I am not sure about the private jet thing, I would think they would show it, if that was the case.
Maybe Ms. Diane did not come because she did not want to own Porsha cheating.
They get to the vacation dinner table scene. Shockingly several arguments break out. Who would have thought! Storm & Londie get into an argument. They are from different sides of Porsha’s family. We saw Storm once season 5 of RHOA when Cynthia had her “pageant at Walmart” haha. Every time I see Storm she gives off a very aggressive City Girls-esque vibe.
I doubt Porsha is close to half of the people on the table. It seems like she just needed people to fill seats.
I think I am watching more out of routine or just to see the episode for the sake of seeing it rather than out of actual pleasure or enjoyment. Almost every scene is predictable.
OMG, thank you for sparing me having to watch this shite show. That is all-
Couldn’t Porsha have gotten this spin off and still remain a housewife? Other housewives have done/are doing that. This show gives me a headache. There are so many family members it is hard to keep track of who is who.
She was offered a contract for the upcoming season is one of the few people who actually declined. I feel like Simon is telling her she needs her own show. She also quit Dish at the same time. It’s seemed like a pretty dumb decision to me. Wait until she finds out about Simon’s questionable finances. Allegedly.
In other news, the boy that Falynn got impregnated by who was allegedly her assistant was somehow able to buy her a 2022 high end Range Rover as a push present? He’s like 12 years old? Where is the money coming from?
Buy outright. borrow, or lease? Maybe he had enough for a down payment and the repo man will be there before the 3-month doctor visit. Hell, it may have been rental for the month. Anything to build her YouTube page if you ask me.
Who on God’s good green earth is that…woman? Who hates her so much that they did not stop her from going on tv looking like that?!?!? That is decidedly NOT a good look. I don’t know if I feel sorry no one stopped her or if I am completely…flabbergasted. Wow Also why??? I haven’t read the recap because I can’t get over that header pic. And don’t get on me about body shaming cause COME ON! That dress is wrong. Okay I’ll see myself out now. I’m no great shakes but I’m right.
That’s not body shaming Three Cats! The getup was horrific. And she seems awfully proud of her boobs for a woman of a certain age, but we don’t need all of that! lol.
I have just watched my last Episode of Porsha’s family matters show. What a trashy show and Porsha has a very short fuse! Thank God Porsha’s Aunt Liz was there to talk Porsha off the ledge! The cast should NEVER get physical with other cast members….grow up!!!!