Tamara Tattles

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You are here: Home / Vanderpump Rules / Vanderpump Rules Recap: It’s A Mad, Mad, Pool Party

Vanderpump Rules Recap: It’s A Mad, Mad, Pool Party

November 30, 2021 by tamaratattles 30 Comments

It is time for another Vanderpump Rules recap. But is anyone actually still watching this show? It gets slightly more views than Winter House and less than half as much as Below Deck. So… I guess on that note we’ll get started.

We begin to with the guys attempting to drive some golf balls. Emphasis on attempting. Scheana, Katie, and Lala go to a Pilates class. It only goes marginally better than the guys’ golfing. Lala and Katie both trash Sandoval. Back at the driving range, Sandoval is over Lala, and so is Brock. Why are men so strange. And I use the term ‘men’ very loosely in this instance. After, Sandoval loses a bet to James, James gets the pleasure (?) of sticking a golf tee in Sandoval’s ass and hitting another golf ball. What is wrong with all of these morons and why am I watching this!???

Once Upon A Tom

Later, Katie and Schwartz and Sandoval get together tryout new cocktails for the new bar. Katie doesn’t want to have any cocktails. There is already lots of chatter on social media that Katie is pregnant. But, people say that about everyone on theses shows who weighs over 97 pounds.  James and one of the server’s from SUR came over. Sandoval is very into novelty cocktails with weird flavor combinations. The conversation turns to the bar name. Sandoval is adamant that it is Schwartz and Sandy. Katie says that is a terrible name. As Lea Black said on Twitter today, “Even a blind pig finds an acorn every once in a while.” Katie likes Once Upon A Tom. That’s much better. Screaming ensues. Katie storms off to bed.

CLICK HERE FOR MORE VANDERPUMP RULES RECAPS & NEWS!

The next morning Schwartz made Katie breakfast in bed. Schwartz doesn’t want Katie at the bar anymore. It’s too much drama. Katie is pissed. Meanwhile, James talks with an old family friend about his sobriety, he says he needs to get off the pot. Brock just drank a beer out of the shoe he was wearing. These guys are so gross. There is yet another cocktail tasting at Sandovals. Lala, Katie, and James decline the invitation. I haven’t seen hair nor hide of Raquel this entire episode. At the cocktail party, Scheana totally throws Lala and Katie under the bus for bitching about Sandoval at Pilates. But, the guys don’t bring up how they were trashing Lala. Oh! There is Raquel. Just drinking in the background in a big black hat. Schwartz is pissed at Scheana and Sandoval. Sandoval trashes Katie. Schwartz almost, kinda sticks up for her.

Vanderpump RulesOh Yay! It’s The Obligatory LVP Scene!

I was really hoping that the opening montage with her dog humping her might have been the extent of her appearance. She and her partner in crime, Ken, go to SUR. Charli and Raquel are the only ones still working at SUR. James shows up with flowers for Raquel, just because. Then, she tells him Lisa and Ken are inside, so he goes in to shoot some sort of preplanned scene. Basically, he tells them he is quitting pot. Instead of them being supportive, they kind of try to talk him out of it and tell him just to cut back.

CLICK HERE FOR MORE VANDERPUMP RULES RECAPS & NEWS!

Next there is yet another party with weird costumes. And once again I don’t know who half the people are. I think it is Brock’s birthday? Yes, it is. He has invited a lot of his friends. Meanwhile, Lala and Katie confront Scheana for throwing them under the bus with Sandoval. After, the two bitches feel like they have shamed her enough, they drop it. Since when are Lala and Katie BFFs? Lala tries to force Schwartz to make sure that Katie is included in the bar.

Next time, the moronic guys take ice baths. And the ditzy girls model their feet on the Internet to make money for Raquel’s nose job. Schwartz loses a bet and has to get something tattooed on his ass.

Le sigh.

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Filed Under: Vanderpump Rules Tagged With: Ariana Madix, Brock Davies, Charli Burnett, James Kennedy, Katie Maloney, Lala Kent, Lisa Vanderpump, Pump Rules, Randall Emmett, Raquel Leviss, Richardson Cherry, Scheana Shay, Tom Sandoval, Tom Schwartz, Vanderpump Rules

About tamaratattles

Come for the tea. Stay for the shade. Not for the easily offended. You're a special snowflake just like everyone else.

Comments

  1. Terri says

    December 1, 2021 at 1:15 am

    I’m still watching because I obviously am a glutton for punishment and I don’t have anything better to do. The Pilates instructor was scary skinny. The guys (and women) are stuck in high school mode and it’s not a good look.

    Reply
    • kitty says

      December 1, 2021 at 8:48 pm

      definitely arrested development

      Reply
    • Kelly says

      December 3, 2021 at 6:53 am

      She definitely had an ‘issue’ I wonder why they chose to put her on the show?? Such a trigger for ppl dealing with eating disorders.

      Reply
  2. Queenjen says

    December 1, 2021 at 3:42 am

    Haven’t got it here yet, but I’m definitely watching – ad an Australian, Brock’s existence makes me cringe, he’s a total thirst trap, so he’s hit the mother lode ( see what I did there) with Scheana. Guys like him are everywhere here and he is just adoring having sit downs with LVP. Blech. And I’m definitely reading the recaps every week. Your work is never in vain!

    Reply
  3. memyselfandi says

    December 1, 2021 at 8:28 am

    This show is just bad without Jax, Stassi, and Kristen and every episode is the same thing with the same boring storylines. The only amusement is watching Lala give all the other women relationship advice when they are all still in relationships and she is now a single mom.

    Reply
  4. Deb in SF says

    December 1, 2021 at 8:49 am

    TT, you’re gonna LOVE what Schwartz is getting tattooed on his ass! He lost a ping pong bet with LVP so he’s getting her initials tattooed. Katie’s gonna loooove it too, NOT.
    This show has worn very thin. I like Raquel and Ariana and l liked Charli in this episode. She handled that guy at Brock’s party like a true feminist! But all the guys suck.

    Reply
    • Lisa Stroh says

      December 1, 2021 at 9:14 am

      His pretend crush on Lisa is one of the most annoying fake storylines in this entire show. I think she makes production keep it going year after year because she can’t stand getting older. Hence the INSANE filter they put on her face during her scenes.

      Reply
  5. Mtricky says

    December 1, 2021 at 9:14 am

    Good question TT, who is watching this mess?? but more importantly, why am I! I can’t stand Katie and Lala so I find their friendship is just annoying. Total cringe every time they change. And who the hell does Lala think she is! Inserting her opinions on the toms business decisions. They didn’t want Randall involved and I can see why- Lala would have taken over and made it all about herself. Katie needs to stay out of it too. Girl has to find her own story line. The only parts of the show that are even slightly enjoyable anymore are LVP and Ken, and Rachael and Charlie at least they aren’t acting like a bunch of 12 year olds like the rest of the cast. I
    Don’t mind schena and brock when they are on their own and not mixed up in the Lala drama that infuses every damn episode.

    Reply
    • Terri says

      December 1, 2021 at 12:31 pm

      Katie & Lala are friends because the two mean girls Katie was friends with (Kristen & Stassi) are no longer on the show. Mean girls have to stick together.

      Reply
      • tamaratattles says

        December 1, 2021 at 3:15 pm

        Good point. Ariana isn’t running in to be friends with Katie, because she’s not an asshole.

        Reply
    • BeetsWhy says

      December 2, 2021 at 2:58 pm

      You have to admit Lala’s impression of Schwartz’s cocktails was hilariously accurate! Around here I pay $17ish for a double Goose on the rocks so I can’t imagine what they charge for one of those concoctions.

      Reply
  6. NancyintheSmokies says

    December 1, 2021 at 9:14 am

    “Once Upon A Tom” is SO much better! Their name Sucks! And you are watching this shit so we won’t have to! ;)) Katie should definitely have her hand in, she was a cocktail waitress, you idiots!! She knows what people like/want. I had a really tight group of friends in my early twenties, and we certainly weren’t hitting golf balls off peoples asses. We were being very active, skiing, camping, boating, hiking, going to concerts, we are all actually still in touch.

    Being single and widowed sucks. Christmas has so many expectations and it just makes me anxious. Oh wait, we were talking about Vanderpump Rules!! I was wondering, does anyone think LVP brought Sheana over to SUR to stir the pot with Brandy? I really want to know opinions, or maybe it’s just obvious and I am a naïve asshole. Greetings to you and Banjo at su casa!!

    Reply
    • Tam says

      December 1, 2021 at 6:27 pm

      I love the name! So much better. I’m not watching the show just reading recaps. I agree with most that they are too old for this. I don’t want to see LVP or 40 somethings acting like those just starting out. You’re forgiven for doing stupid stuff in your 20s. When 40 or close it’s just sad.

      Reply
      • tamaratattles says

        December 1, 2021 at 7:20 pm

        Exactly, Tam. I have to juggle a ton of shows on my DVR to get Floribama Shore (tomorrow night at 8 on MTV) to record. But, It is one of my Saturday shows. It’s utterly ridiculous. There is even a house guest that shits all over the floor! But it is funny when that guest is a baby pig and not a 60 something year old drunk woman. Moronic shows about 20 somethings locked in a house is fun. After 40, the show need to have more substance than just a bunch of bitches screaming at each other.

        Reply
        • Tam says

          December 1, 2021 at 9:56 pm

          I’ve never watched Floribama but have seen the commercials. (Yes people I only have regular cable tv. No streaming or anything extra. ) But I can forgive them cause they’re young and stupid. 😊

          Reply
  7. 4paz says

    December 1, 2021 at 9:16 am

    I have always secretly loved VPR, but I am over it. It is a stale formula, and the scenes with LVP are so forced. Even my husband said, “Why would she hang out with the Toms?” It is so phony! The real friendships are what made this show, and those are gone. Cancel it.

    Selling Sunset is fun –HW meets Million $ Listing. Are you watching it on Netflix, TT?

    Reply
  8. Lisa Stroh says

    December 1, 2021 at 9:19 am

    I am watching but only because I need a certain amount of hour long shows to “entertain” me on my morning treadmill run. It has become painful and terrible, and I say this as a long time fan. These people don’t enjoy each other, enjoy themselves and they are just….not interesting anymore. The other characters were horrible people but they provided a foil for the remaining people to shine, without them they are just showing their worst flaws in order to seem interesting. Lala is just such a bad villan in the fact that she has stripped herself of all redeeming qualities with her hubris. As golden as the first seasons were they should have just realized the show was over and focused on creating something totally new. Oh and I wouldn’t hate it if LVP has another failing show although I think she will crawl back to BH when it happens and I don’t want her on there.

    Reply
    • Deb in SF says

      December 2, 2021 at 3:20 am

      When Kyle was asked if she thought LVP would ever come back to RH, she said emphatically not.

      Reply
  9. Nanette says

    December 1, 2021 at 11:25 am

    The biggest problem (besides Katie) I have with the Toms’ new bar is the conflict of interests/style/focus. Contrast can work … or not …

    They are going for a dive bar decor, while serving chi-chi AF cocktails. It seems forced.

    The name Schwartz and Sandy’s adheres to dive bar traditions. In a tiny town I lived in, we had Chuck & Henry’s, Club Tac (Tacconi), Ray’s Corner, Toot’s, Toots & Gully’s, U & I Oasis Club. In L.A., Frank & Musso’s is legendary. But after the owners die, and the people who knew who they were die … then what? (And why isn’t it Schwartz’s & Sandy’s? Schwartz doesn’t warrant an apostrophe?)

    Those fancy AF cocktails are the FOUNDATION of the Tom’s enterprise. It seems that a mad scientist lair or hi-tech laboratory or an alchemist’s studio with beakers and glass tubes, etc., would be more fitting than a dive bar. Or at least retro supper club elegance. Then again, the retro cocktails seeing a resurgence (Moscow Mule, etc.) were once au courant, as were the bars. But, when the bars were new, they were cutting edge, the “dive” usually happens as the bar (and the clientele) age. I DO LOVE dive bars — and the signs — but starting a new dive bar seems inauthentic. They need to earn the patina.

    Reply
    • tamaratattles says

      December 1, 2021 at 3:14 pm

      ” (And why isn’t it Schwartz’s & Sandy’s? Schwartz doesn’t warrant an apostrophe?)” Nope. This is proper way to punctuate a joint possessive, as they are both owners. Think Ben & Jerry’s.

      Reply
      • Nanette says

        December 1, 2021 at 3:54 pm

        Oh. I do remember that now!

        People are likely to just call it Schwartz or Swartzie’s anyway.

        Reply
        • Deb in SF says

          December 2, 2021 at 3:22 am

          When did anyone ever call Sandoval “Sandy”?

          Reply
          • tamaratattles says

            December 2, 2021 at 4:42 am

            Never. Maybe he is transitioning? Only like half kidding.

            Reply
            • BeetsWhy says

              December 2, 2021 at 3:02 pm

              😂😂😂

      • Judith Vance says

        December 1, 2021 at 4:39 pm

        i love ben & jerry’s. i’m enjoying new york super fudge chunk as i type. i liked the first season of vanderpump rules for the authenticity of emotion. then they started acting and i stopped watching.

        Reply
    • KaraW says

      December 1, 2021 at 8:38 pm

      That’s a really great point, Nanette. I don’t hate the name Schwartz and Sandy, but something like the Mad Scientist or the Alchemist, or something fancy would make more sense with who they are and what they serve. Maybe something alluding to the Roaring 20’s or something else that sounds fancy or mysterious. The way he described it in his way-too-long mission statement, something with Alice in Wonderland or DeJa Vu would also make sense.

      Reply
  10. Nana says

    December 1, 2021 at 3:12 pm

    I’m Just going to read recaps from you …. No way I want to give this views on bravo. The novelty of the show was when they were “struggling, young…” and they are not either anymore.

    Why can’t bravo find some new people to follow around?

    Reply
    • tamaratattles says

      December 1, 2021 at 3:18 pm

      They literally released EVERYONE from their contracts after the last season because they didn’t see a plan going forward with this. It was done. I guess it was the baby boom that they thought we wanted to see. As it turns out I do not to see Lala with her multiple night nurses. She needs to learn how to take care of her own baby.

      Reply
      • Nanette says

        December 1, 2021 at 3:57 pm

        I’m sick of the mothers acting like they are so fucking special just because they gave birth. Like it was no big deal UNTIL THEY gave birth.

        I think Lala is happy Rand cheated. Because now she has her guaranteed child care $$$$$ and she can go giving BJs to some younger hotter guy.

        Reply
      • Mike b. says

        December 1, 2021 at 3:58 pm

        I imagine the ex was paying the nurses and nannies. Bye gurl.

        Reply

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