Hello, Tamara Tattles readers! I’m atdleft, and I’m here to deliver today’s RHUGT Recap. My, oh my, do we have a lot to talk about. The first three episodes all dropped today, so we have plenty to unpack!
What on earth is RHUGT, and why is it on Peacock?
As you may remember, these Real Housewives were drafted for Season 1 of Real Housewives Ultimate Girls Trip (or RHUGT): Ramona Singer and Luann de Lesseps from RHONY, Cynthia Bailey and Kenya Moore from RHOA, Teresa Giudice and Melissa Gorga from RHONJ, and Kyle Richards from RHOBH. They jetted away to Turks and Caicos for eight days in April, and we finally get to see the product of all their labor here and now.
In case anyone still wonders why the hell we have to download the Peacock app to watch this show, here’s the condensed version of the story. Ratings are cratering across the board for Comcast-owned TV networks, including Bravo. Though Comcast has attracted a good amount of viewers to Peacock thus far, they’re still losing money… And they face stiff competition from the likes of Time Warner’s HBOMax, Viacom’s Paramount Plus, Disney Plus, and Netflix. Basically, Comcast-NBC is hoping that RHUGT, more “comfort food TV” mainstays, and the kind of new original programming that used to premiere on NBC in the pre-streaming days will convince us to pay for Peacock.
OK, that’s enough small talk. Let’s move on with the RHUGT Recap!
Within the first ten minutes, we start to see the RHUGT alliances forming. While speaking with Melissa over the phone, Ramona verbally shitposted about Teresa, “She’s a bit of a scarecrow. If only she had a brain!” Later, when Melissa filled in Teresa on what Ramona said about her, Teresa countered, “She looks like the tin man. […] She doesn’t have a heart!” Keep in mind that this went down before they all boarded the Gulfstream jet! In case you were wondering how and why Teresa and Kenya formed an alliance, it became obvious within the first ten minutes that Ramona brought them together.
“You and I – New York City – put Bravo on the map.” Yes, really, Ramona said that!
Once they boarded the plane, Ramona immediately got the group riled up even more. Since RHOC’s Vicki Gunvalson was placed in the RHUGT Season 2 group, Ramona must have figured she could get away with this. As she conversed with Luann, Ramona declared, “They started out in Orange County. No one knew where Orange County was. You and I – New York City – put Bravo on the map.”
Needless to say, that went down as well as a sip of Ramona Pinot Grigio. Kyle and Kenya boasted of their respective shows’ ratings, while Teresa stated in her confessional, “Call me when you invent a move that literally defines the franchise. I invented table-flipping.” If anyone knows fighting words, it’s Teresa.
“I propose we consider giving Kenya the master [suite].” Yeah, no. Cynthia’s modest proposal didn’t go over so well.
Cynthia then sought to change the energy of the flight by praising Kenya’s mothership skills and everything she’s done for Brooklyn. Then, after she noted how difficult Kenya’s divorce from Mark Daly has been, Cynthia had a modest proposal for the group: Let Kenya have the master suite in the Turks and Caicos mansion.
Surprisingly, Ramona agreed… So long as Ramona got the second-best room in the mansion. Everyone else, however, wasn’t convinced. I mean, hasn’t it become a Housewives rite of passage for them to fight over rooms on girls’ trips?
“What you’re not going to do on this trip is call me a bitch!” Kenya lays down some ground rules for Ramona.
As the flight wore on, Ramona decided to poke more bears. As Ramona recalled the infamous Conch Shack incident during the RHONY Season 7 “Turks and Cockos” trip, Kenya poked at Ramona’s blurry divorce timeline. Ramona called Kenya a bitch, and Kenya quickly shot back, “What you’re not going to do on this trip is call me a bitch!”
Finally, the Housewives made it to the mansion! They fall head over heels for the hunky house staff. Of course, Ramona rushed in to “mark her territory”. Of course, the other Housewives complained about Ramona being so extra so early. And, of course, Ramona couldn’t even remember to call Kenya by her actual name.
“Hang with Kyle, because she’s normal.” Joe Gorga might have some useful advice!
Once the Housewives settled in, Cynthia and Teresa bonded some more over their mutual loathing of Ramona. Yes, Teresa actually pulled up her Instagram statistics – 2.2 million followers for Teresa, versus 902,000 for Ramona – to counter Ramona’s boasts about “seniority”.
Once Kyle and Melissa joined Cynthia and Teresa, they all had plenty to say about Ramona’s tiny white macrame dress. Luann wisely pulled Ramona away to the beach, so the rest of the ladies could continue talking shit about Ramona. Melissa facetimed Joe Gorga with Kyle, and Joe had some sage advice for his spouse: “Hang with Kyle, because she’s normal.”
Who’s ready for dinner at the Conch Shack?
Before they even arrived at the Conch Shack, Kyle and Melissa aimed at another hornet’s nest by speculating over whether Kenya’s feeding intel to celebrity blogger Anthony Dominick. Then at dinner, Kyle dropped this bomb on the entire group. Even Cynthia seemed open to believing that Kenya was the one tipping off Anthony Dominick on RHUGT in real time.
I’m not sure whether it’s more that Kenya is highly skilled at taking the heat off herself or that Ramona is an expert in making everything about herself. Whatever’s the case, the dinner conversation again turned to Ramona. Cynthia pulled Ramona aside and basically begged her to apologize and act more gracefully.
Ramona attempted her “Apologizer!” superpower yet again. Surprise (but not really), it doesn’t work as well away from RHONY.
So Ramona actually took Cynthia’s advice and apologized about her attempt to bulldoze her way into her preferred room. That just opened the door for Teresa to grill Ramona over the “scarecrow” comment. While Cynthia was fast to make amends with Ramona, Teresa and Kenya were not as interested in Ramona’s apologies.
Teresa and Ramona did hug it out, but it was clear that this truce wouldn’t last long. Fortunately a group of dancers marched over to the table to change the energy of the space. Upon returning to the mansion, Cynthia patted herself on the back for diffusing Ramona’s stink bombs. Kyle then tried to smooth things over with Ramona some more. But in a sneak preview for the next episode, the producers clued us in on a bigger blow-up involving Ramona and a yacht.
Episode two will be up tomorrow.