This season Shahs of Sunset has been great! The reunion? Not so much. Hopefully, tonight’s Shahs of Sunset recap will not be all about Mike and Paulina. Because nobody cares. Literally, no one. According to my source Shahs is going to be renewed again for another season. They are looking for someone new to join the cast. Probably as a friend. And if they find someone one of the friends is leaving. I hope it is London. I don’t dislike her, but she just seems like someone they brought in to be the “therapist” and she is in way over her head for that job. Actually, I think Sigmund Freud would be in over his head with this bunch. I am fading fast and still have two more recaps to go tonight. ARGH!
We are back on set with Paulina backtracking. She was drunk when she told Destiney all the things she told her. She talked too much. Paulina doesn’t remember what she said, etc. etc. Paulina is not very good at this. She regrets talking too much to everyone. Andy keeps trying to go back to the topic anyway. They talk about Mike saying to Destiney that he can buy and sell her. He sort of apologizes. Hell, he can’t even pay for his own place to live? How do the other do so well with their money but Mike always seems broke as a muthafucker. What does he do with his money? Does it all go up his nose? He looks really disheveled on this reunion like he is drinking and doing coke and vaping pot all at the same time. That would be my guess.
Destiney and Mike continue to argue. Destiney says her dick is bigger than Mike’s. I get the metaphor; however, Destiney not having a dick at all is still bigger than Mike’s. Mike slips up and calls Paulina his “most prized possession.” Even Andy Cohen winces. Good Grief! Everyone realizes that Mike is ALLGEDLY high as a kite. Even Reza can’t defend this behavior, so you know it is bad. Paulina says she didn’t go to Friendsgiving because she didn’t want to be a dinner where she was not thankful for those around her. This bish! Does she really think any of are buying this nonsense?
For The Love Of GOD, Can We Please Move On?
Andy keeps going for Paulina and I am here for it. Paulina keeps backing herself in a corner. She’s not savvy enough for this reunion. She’s like someone with one boxing lesson from that dude on RHONY going up against half a dozen heavyweight boxers. Yet on we go with the Paulina and Mike show. Why? No one cares! Andy brings up the phone call from Paulina to Destiney where she says, “History has repeated itself and at this point I have reached my end.” Andy follows up by asking Mike about being caught AGAIN being unfaithful. Mike denies it. He says there were just more “spoofs texts.” Nobody believes him. No. Bod. EE.
Andy asks if Mike has gotten any kind of help for his sex addiction. Mike says he has been talking to a Rabbi. I do not believe that for a minute. I cannot see Mike being honest with a Rabbi of all people about his sex addiction. Mike says that he and Paulina are engaged. They are fine. Andy wants to know when they are getting married. Mike says, “soon” and by soon he means whenever Bravo wants to pay for the wedding. AGAIN. Andy asks if Paulina has anything else to say before he boots her off the stage. She tells Destiney, she would love to have “that relationship” with her again. She will need a friend next season so she can still be on the show. Paulina is a HUGE fame whore. Destiney says she never told the group all the things Paulina told her. Mercedeh is like, PLEASE, the actual cast has things to work through. Paulina leaves.
Love In The Time Of Covid
FINALLY! We move on to the main cast. Perhaps Mercedeh will get to speak. Andy talks to Golnesa about her desire to explore polyamory. Andy points out she could not even be faithful to her husband for the few months they were married. Most of the cast is not dating due to Covid. Destiney has a fear of the grocery store like I do. Only I had it before Covid. It is worse now. Golensa says Nema’s dick is a Persian cucumber not a regular cucumber. Nema seems to be a hot commodity among other Bravolebs. Garcelle in particular thinks he is hot. He’s way too young and naive for her. Scheana likes him too. He went on a date from Paige from Summer house. Jules from Summer House also is into him. You go, Nema!
Reza says that Adam was not really interested in filming the show. He has his own job and feels “the exact same way Paulina does about filming” according to Reza. Andy asks about the baby situation. Reza says it is not happening and he never, ever, every wants to have a kid. He gets emotional. This is a total change of heart. But now, Reza says he doesn’t think it is a good idea. He has learned some things about himself. Basically he is an asshole. Reza walks off the set to cry. PUHLEASE. On the other hand things are finally getting interesting. Reza thinks he would suck as a dad. I agree. Apparently, Reza no longer has love for MJ’s mom. Reza’s dad is very ill and “non-verbal” I am so sorry to hear that. MJ comforts him.
Mike says he misses his relationship with Reza. He’s the older brother he always wanted. Unfortunately, they don’t communicate well. They attack each other a lot on social media instead of talking to each other. They truly love each other. But, Reza is just such a dick. But they profess their love for each other and hug it out.
FINALLY, Queen Mercedeh Is Allowed To Speak!
And we saved the best for last. Mercedeh says she is so focused as a mom that the romance in her marriage is suffering. She sees so much of her father in baby Shams. Reza speaks very highly of Mercedeh’s father. They were very close. That is why it is killing him that he can’t meet Baby Shams. Well, motherfucker, actions have consequences. What do you think Mercedeh’s father would have to say about the way you have treated her over the years? Merce says she misses not being able to call Reza all the time and the closeness of the relationship. Her dress is gorgeous.
Reza is pissed that Tommy ripped up his letter. He says he doesn’t want a relationship with Tommy. Well, that’s mutual. It sounds like Reza is maybe going to drop the restraining order? That will not make a difference. MJ says that Tommy sees all the stuff that Reza puts in social media. Mercedeh mentions that Reza liked a lot of tweets about people making fun of her almost dying in childbirth. Reza’s response is, “What? From years ago?” I don’t think there is a statute of limitations for a husband to abide by when her so called best friend is mocking her near death experience you POS. Reza wants to make this all about him. Golnesa supports Reza.
Reza Is A Total Dick
I love Mercedeh’s entire look. She looks amazing. Reza says that not being friends with Mercedeh has been the happiest time in his life. So great! Leave baby Shams out of it you POS. Tommy wants Reza to go to anger management and this is why. Reza says he will drop the restraining order but he is not going to anger management. He is not going to hang out with Merce, and he is not going to see “her kid.” MJ says it is a really deep cut when he forms new friendships with others and not make room for her. Merce says that she wants a relationship with him but they need to have some serious conversations. Reza is a sad excuse for a human being. Check out this link from BEFORE THE SERIES EVEN AIRED! I was right in 2012!
Why is Mike weighing in on this. He and Golnesa seem to blame their spouses. Mike thinks they will work it out. Mercedeh is crying. And is ready to wrap things up. Instead of a toast they are going to eat pies. IDGI. It has something to do with Golnesa. Mike and Destiney hug it out. That was weird. Backstage, MJ and Reza talk again. Mercedeh is crying. She basically tells Reza she doesn’t know how to fix things. She misses him. WHY MERCEDEH? WHY? He is not worth your time. They hug and kiss it out.
That was a great season!