So, um “Good Morning”? I just woke up in time to pound out this RHONY recap. I have been trying to keep up with the Olympics in real time. I’ve only dealt with moderated comments so far but it seems that everyone thinks I am being an asshole in comments. At the time I was posting we had no idea what was going on with Simone Biles. She seemed “fine” despite her poor performance on the vault. We saw no injury. Now I am learning she pulled out due to mental health issues. I hope she can get the help she needs and recovers soon. If anyone gets what she is going through, it is me. I have appointments next week to deal with my own shit. If only I had some healthy organs to sell. Just kidding. Sorta Being crazy ain’t cheap. LOL.
It’s Christmas Time In The City
I am so ready to get the fuck out of Salem. That cast trip was one of the worst ever. It’s Ramona’s birthday. Or birthday month. Or year. She seems really into birthdays. I’m not into them at all. Luann is doing a joint party for Sonja and Ramona. Does anyone enjoy these boxing scenes? I am not a fan. Sonja is talking to the boxing coach about her lack of relationship with her dad. Apparently, he is a therapist and a boxing coach. Eboni shares about her lack of a father as well. Meanwhile, Luann and Ramona are worried about Sonja and her drinking.
Eboni chats with her potential sister, Ashley, to see if they are actually related. Neither of them had close relationship with their potential dad. They both have trust issues with men. I feel like even Luann is shocked that production put her in charge of the Ramona/Sonja birthday party. Make it make sense. Leah wants to be in charge of the cake. Bad idea. Luann has gone to great extremes to be papped with “Garth.” So that is over. She got a new vibrator instead. Did we need to know that? We are already almost halfway in and I’m sort of still waiting for the episode to start. I’m kind of depressed mixed with sleepy so maybe it is just me?
But What Do I Want For Christmas, NOT YOU!
I do love all the shots of NYC at Christmas though. Luann has purchased a beautiful piano to record all the women singing her original Christmas song. We are going to need a lot of autotune. Even Ramona knows she can’t sing. So at least there is that. Why is everyone singing the same one line? I already find the line annoying. But, I am Cranky McCrappypants today. Leah is very concerned the legal side of it all. She is so annoying. Everything is annoying today.
On to the Covid restricted birthday party. Sonja and Bershan are getting along. Sonja claims she is not going to drink with the girls anymore. But the night is young. Kurt the nude poser with the pretty dick has arrived. He looks lovely in clothes. Leah and Eboni describe his penis to Bershan who missed out on the whole nude modeling thing. He brought Ramona roses. There are some other random men there who have been on before. They are all hot and way to young for these women. Then the male strippers show up. Ramona doesn’t care for male strippers. Neither do I. They get stinky stripper oil all over you.
The Black Friend Is Excluded From Black Shabbat
Sonja is already doing shots. Ramona seems to be trying to get some guy named Will to come home with her for her “unbelievable views of the city.” Good luck with that, girl. Meanwhile, Eboni and Leah are talking about their vulvas, but don’t really seem to know what a vulva is. The nude model has to mansplain it to them. Leah goes off to google “vulva.” Because, Idiot. Eboni starts talking about having a “Black Shabbat.” Ramona and Eboni fight over why it has to be a BLACK Shabbat. Just when we thought we were going to get through an episode without a conversation about race. Oddly, Bershan is excluded from Black Shabbat. Because….? Covid? She hasn’t been to Israel with Eboni? Who knows.
I feel like Ramona should just say, let Bershan have my place. Bershan doesn’t care. She is sure it will be another lecture on black history. Leah is still going on and on about the legal issues regarding her song. Have I mentioned I really hate Leah? Ramona and Leah get into it. The Leah and Luann get into a shouting match. This season is really bad, right? Did Leah just say that Rihanna wears her “clothing line?” Surely not. And of course Leah got them a penis cake. And a vagina cake. Because, tacky. Leah and Luann make up. Sort of. Ramona texts one of the guys her address. Sonja asks another guy to “go out for a drink.”
I’m off to sort out the dumpster fire in the Simone Biles comments.