By Guest Recapper Nanette
I‘ll start this Married To Medicine recap the way Bravo started the episode. With a tease involving the M2M men. The men will be “crashing the stage” AND “crashing” this recap. The Bravo suits have been scrambling to find the balance between giving viewers what we want (no more racists), and producing compelling TV (some of the worst people make the best reality TV). The solution to both of Bravo’s Atlanta shows is simple: Give Falynn a peach on RHOA and make the men the official stars of M2M.
Bravo started out with four women married to four doctors and two female doctors married to “non-medicines.” We now have four men married to four doctors and two male doctors married to “non-medicines.” Same factors, same 4:2 ratio. Most M2M followers agree that the men are the best part of the show. If the men were the stars, I’d even vote to keep Lisa Nicole and Kari on as “friends of.” Because it’s so fun to watch the men mess with them. Now, back to our regularly scheduled show/recap.
The Prodigal Wife Reveals A Secret
We see the men’s reactions to Quad’s bombshell news that Dr. Contessa filed for separation. They all look shocked, especially Scott. The men ask Scott what is going on. Scott says he feels like this was a sneak attack. He packs up to leave. Curtis takes Scott under his wing and encourages him to stay and use this platform to tell his side. He says this may be his best, or only, opportunity. Curtis knows, he was there a few seasons ago.
Back out in front, Quad has been urging Contessa to tell the real reason she went away to school. Contessa finally admits it was partly to take a step back from her marriage. She hoped it would give Scott another perspective. Andy commends her for using the crossroads of the marriage to get further education. For her kids, just in case things didn’t work out. Funny, because before Contessa took off, all we viewers (and the cast) ever saw were hearts and flowers in the Metcalfe marriage. Meanwhile, Scott trembles; Cecil steps in and advises Scott to focus on his wife and his kids, not Quad. He reminds Scott “you can only control you.” Scott feels bewildered and betrayed that Quad knew something major before he did.
As Andy announces “The men are crashing the stage,” Scott asks his wife why Quad knew something he did not. Contessa is bewildered. The couple talked about it. They talked to the kids about it. They agreed it was the worst conversation EVER. Their fights are toxic, volatile, below-the-belt. She filed for separation months ago.
Siri Ate My Homework And Amused The Kids
Now, the men are confused. The women are confused. Andy is confused. We viewers likely are the LEAST confused — because we have seen both sides from many points of view throughout the season. We do not need Cool Hand Luke’s Captain to tell us “WHAT WE HAVE HERE IS A FAILURE TO COMMUNICATE!” So much of a failure that Scott confused “separation” with “the D-word.” Now, he feels he jumped the gun and tries to bail. Not so fast! The women want answers. The other men leave.Toya asks the big question: Has Scott been faithful? “F***, yes,” he says. Simone asks Scott what the NUMBER ONE thing is that Contessa wants. The women know, the men know, we know. Scott guesses it wrong. She wants a serious commitment to counseling.
Heavenly wants to know why there are so many rumors out there about Scott cheating. She implies where there’s smoke … Scott tries to explain away the “daddy’s girlfriend” situation. It was “Siri” who caused the confusion. He demonstrates. Siri asks if, by girlfriend, he means Contessa. He says it was on his phone for a long time. Then he backtracks and says it WAS on his phone for a long time. Then, he took it off and just put it back on (for the demo). The women look very skeptical. The men can’t believe their ears. Backstage, the guys want to drag Scott away; they say they’re killing him out in front. Cecil’s calling for a time out. Simone asks about the DMs. Scott says he didn’t even know what they were when he first got on Instagram.
Reshuffling The Deck Of Friendships
Backstage, still confused, Eugene is trying to explain that Scott’s reaction and confusion. He says it feels different when you hear about your problems from another person. Quad wants Scott to understand that she’s not against him — she’s on the Metcalfe marriage team. Contessa’s having a total meltdown. Jackie tries to explain how confusing things are when Contessa tells them things are awful and then their vacation photos tell another story. Contessa gets upset that everyone is “blaming her.” Jackie was not blaming her. NOW, we see the real problem. Neither one of the Metcalfes knows how to LISTEN to ANYBODY else. Toya takes Contessa to the back to console her. Toya shares some of the crazy stuff she and Eugene went through. The two share a hug. (Yes, Eugene, pigs are flying again!)
Andy wants to talk about Jackie and Simone’s friendship. We see a montage of last season’s strife and this season ending in them studying and playing pattycake. Jackie is moved to tears and “can’t articulate.” A viewer wants to know if Simone still feels OK about not inviting Jackie to Michael’s graduation barbecue. Simone says it was only close friends and family and she didn’t want it to be awkward. Except we know it was awkward, especially for Michael, who said he loves Jackie and wanted her at his next event. (Remember, Jackie was Michael’s birthing doctor.) Also, Anila, a new acquaintance, was invited. Jackie, who now can articulate, says THAT is what “super offended” her.
Andy Passes The Queen Of Mean Baton
Messy Andy asks Heavenly if she only tried to facilitate the friendship of the two “Golden Girls” on camera. Heavenly claims Simone and Jackie do not speak. Andy reminds Quad about what she said on WWHL — that it was all for the camera. Quad says she stands by her statement that the two don’t talk. She claims there is something deeper going on and she wants to know what it is. Simone bristles at the insinuation that she fakes anything for the camera and says she doesn’t get paid to do that. She repeats that they are “making progress.” Then, she says Andy may be worse than Heavenly. Andy says what we’re all thinking. “NOT POSSIBLE! Are you fucking kidding me?” He says he’s light shade. He points to Heavenly, “That’s a grenade over there!”
So, now “Light Shade” wants to know about Simone and Heavenly. Another rehash. Each feels the other needs to make more effort. Heavenly’s mad/hurt that Simone didn’t come to her 50th birthday party. Simone yells that she got the invite too late to change her on-call shift. Heavenly says she cannot “out yell” Simone. Bwahahahaha. Another first! Simone is offended by Heavenly’s mean comments about her teeth. Heavenly is the grenade of mean. It comes so naturally she doesn’t even realize it most of the time. Or pretends not to. Simone loves her overbite and says she “will die with this pearly white overbite!” Good for you, Simone.
A Photo By Any Other Name Is Just As Deadly
Another shuffle, then the men all come out and surround Andy. Mr. Light Shade is warming up … He asks how Scott feels. Andy explains that Dr. Damon is home doctoring Damon Jr. He asks Realtor Cecil if he’s trying to get listings from any of the docs. Cecil would rather keep the friendships, so he’s not going after the listings. Eugene still is perfecting his grilling and turntable skills. Kiran says he’s enjoying his first reunion; he will always give an honest answer, even if people won’t like it.
Here we go … in for the kill. We see a montage of lighthearted men moments before Andy asks Cecil about Husband 101. Cecil counts off the first three rules on his fingers. “Your wife is always right.” Times three. Andy asks the guys how Scott having a woman’s photo on his phone fits in. Scott denies having a photo. We see the scene of him showing Eugene and Cecil a woman’s photo on his phone. So, the men call him out. Scott has a problem discerning between DMs, texts, and photos on his phone. Cecil says Husband 101 means NO PHOTOS — including DMs, Facebook, Instagram — belong on a husband’s phone. None! Scott says he did not respond to any DMs … well … maybe an “Oh, wow” or something. But no back and forth chat. Eyerolls from every man.
The Neverending Story Takes Another Twist
Eugene says every man on the stage, because they are on TV, is going to get an inappropriate DM photo. The only appropriate response is no response. Or to remind the sender he is a married man. Then block the sender. Curtis agrees. But maybe not to block them immediately. Ut-oh. Jackie’s ready to storm the stage. Eugene says they all heard all of the wives pass out backstage over that remark. Andy tells us the wives are FAR AWAY and yet we ALL heard them. (Curtis is off the hook because he is not on social media. Smart!)
Light Shade throws the night’s final grenade. Let’s talk about the life coach. Curtis says Scott gave the men an explanation that made perfect sense. He will let Scott handle that one. Cecil adds that the men “checked” Scott (over the confusing life coach clusterfuck). Scott says he made it all up. He did not have a life coach. He was being immature. Because Contessa got a life coach first. Like it was a competition? WTF? Andy looks incredulous. “THIS is the story that convinced all of you?”
Next week: The couples unite on stage; the women talk about the impact of Covid on their marriages; Andy asks Simone what made her overlook college-aged Cecil’s broken-down Hyundai; the women joke about the shade they threw at each other, but Quad takes it to another level. And Scott is in the hot seat — again.