I was so down for the count the last week or so I didn’t even realize I missed part one of the RHOC reunion until now. So I’m going to do a brief RHOC recap of part one now. And I am going to watch it online so that will be a PITA.
Okay this whole small sad, house storyline is ridiculous and WAY too time consuming. No one cares. Okay I do sort of remember watching this and making an open forum about it. I really don’t have much of anything to say about this episode. I’m pretty sure I fell asleep during it the first time. And watching these people traveling and living their lives during Covid annoys me most of the time. But doing it while sick was just irritating.
Can We PUHLEASE Mute Braunwyn So The Others Can Speak?
Elizabeth is so emotional about her relationships on part one. She’s crying. Everyone is being nice to her. Andy asks if she is still in love with her ex. Elizabeth gets even more emotional. And then for no reason, Braunwyn starts telling Elizabeth that her ex is engaged and has been with someone for five years. Can we put Braunwyn on an island with Leva somewhere? I can’t think of any worse punishment for Braunwyn. That’s really all I have to say about episode one. I did kind of like Kelly giving it back to Andy a little bit. He was fine to ask all the questions about her bad behavior online. But it just went on and on and on. Clearly, there is nothing to have a reunion about this season.
Now on to the second and final reunion episode. Will we hear from anyone other than Braunwyn? And do we really care? Nothing really happened this season. I’m shocked there are two episodes of this. Anyway, we ended last week with Shannon revealing that Braunwyn offered one of her daughter’s drugs when she was 14. So we pick up there and at first Braunwyn gives a two word apology. Then someone wonders if she said things like that to her own kids. She says she doesn’t remember saying it to Shannon’s kid. And doesn’t know if she said it to her own. Then, she realizes that everyone is looking at her like she is a monster so she starts fake crying and apologizing repeatedly. Is anyone buying this act?Well, Emily is buying this whole routine. So is Shannon. Kelly is not.
Even More Braunwyn Dramatics
Oh Hey, Gina! You haven’t had a chance to say three words so far. Here is your moment. Directly after a package about Matt abusing Gina, instead of asking the obvious question, “What’s the update on that situation?” Andy puts of photos of her many hairstyles over the short season and asks her to rank them in order. This is starting to feel like an episode of WWHL. Are they going to play Dick Pong next? Gina says that Matt and his girlfriend were at family Thanksgiving and it went well. Gina says the co-parent very well. Gina is very emotional. Matt’s case has not been to court yet. He has a plea deal where he would be on home arrest for a few months. He hasn’t taken it yet. I think he needs real jail time.
After that heavy topic everyone asks for a bathroom break. Apparently, they have to clear the way first or something. So as they wait for the all clear, Braunwyn has another dramatic moment. As everyone walks off Emily goes to comfort Braunwyn.
And Just Like That We Go Back To Kelly
Oh Kelly, Kelly, Kelly. What a hot mess. Kelly and Shannon are now BFFs! Kelly and Shannon’s boyfriend know all the same people. Rick and Jolie are best friends. Sounds like everything is perfect with Kelly. Which to me means, what is she hiding now? (Sidenote: I live near an AFB and there has been an insane amount of air traffic the past couple of days. Steady traffic as I write this. #Anxiety) When asked about her wedding, Kelly got a bit bitchy again. She only had 28 people at her wedding (because 30 people or less) and none of her cast mates were invited at first because of that. Then at the last minute, a couple dropped and she invited Gina and Emily. But they couldn’t get child care that late.
Someone on Twitter asked about having a wedding during a pandemic. Elizabeth said she thought it was fine if everyone got tested first. Kelly said people think she shouldn’t have a wedding but it is okay to protest. Another Twitter question for Kelly asked why she was calling protesters looters. As a person of color shouldn’t she be more supportive? Kelly who never apologizes said she understood why people were upset over the Drunk Lives Matter hat. She threw a couple of lies in there first but she came around. Braunwyn, this seasons BLM spokesperson thanked her on behalf of BLM advocates everywhere. Really? It more offensive to me that Braunwyn from Newport took a professional photographer to a BLM march and made it all about her.
We Interrupt The Shouting About Politics…For More Braunwyn
Why is Kelly shouting from the rooftops that she is black? She is NOT BLACK! Shall I remind you that I called out Kelly Dodd for being racist before she shot her first scene? I also think she will be the next one fired for racism. The streets are talking.
Emily calls out Braunwyn for always playing the victim and also saying horrible things about all of them. Kelly points out that Braunwyn goes on TV and says horrific things about all of them. They play a clip of an interview with Braunwyn on ET. She basically said she can’t get any support from her cast regarding BLM and LGBT issues. Another all out screaming match occurs. She basically called them all racist and homophobic. Andy has completely given up moderating this shit show.
MAKE IT STOP!
Braunwyn starts screaming that she is not sexually confused. She’s the poster child for sexual confusion Elizabeth blurts out that she is bisexual but doesn’t need to announce it every time she enters a room. Andy is intrigued and finally wakes up. Elizabeth clarifies that she is a non-practicing bisexual. Oh for the love of God! Can someone please get these people a Kinsey Scale? BTW, I called Elizabeth as gay early in the season. But bi it is! Baby steps. Andy draws this segment to a close saying that with all that Braunwyn has going on in her life, she’s really not ready to be anyone’s role model. That may be the smartest thing I’ve ever heard Andy say on a reunion show.
Who wants some more Braunwyn? Me neither. But she is about to publicly humiliate her husband on national TV. What is the point of announcing to the world that you have never been attracted to your husband? I’ll just be over here banging my head on the wall.
Jesus, Kelly Dodd. We are really quite busy at the moment being disgusted with Braunwyn. All you had to do is shut up for the last few minutes of the show. Instead you are going to say that what you learned this season was not to live in fear of Covid and just go live your life? YOU HAD A FREE PASS and you just put your foot in your mouth AGAIN! Shannon learned that family is important. Emily as well. Braunwyn learned she has a lot of work to do. Elizabeth said she learned it’s not about material things. Emily has learned to trust herself.