Tamara Tattles

Come for the tea. Stay for the shade.

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You are here: Home / Open Forum / Open Forum: About Last Night…

Open Forum: About Last Night…

January 16, 2021 by tamaratattles 80 Comments

Thanks so much to all of you who alerted me to my personal information being posted online. Yesterday was one of the dreaded Quarterly Payment days for  small businesses. It is even more difficult this year because I had to guesstimate taxes based on last year. I thought perhaps I should not have to pay the fourth quarter because 2020 ad revenue was much lower than 2019 ad revenue. But when I filed for 2019 I just projected that 2020 would be a little bit better than 2019. So I have way over paid my taxes. Anyway when I pay I always take a screenshot as proof of on time payment.

I have Absolutely no idea how I somehow manage to upload that screenshot to my site! Clearly, I am an idiot. Thanks to MelG for not only calling me to let me know and helping me get it off but for also enduring a very lengthy conversation with me. I literally could not stop talking to her and she was a real trooper. I did my own taxes last year and can’t believe it is time to get started on them again. It’s like the hardest thing in the world. Unlike most housewives, I try to pay my taxes. It can just be difficult to do. I had a mental breakdown trying to figure it out the last time. And I managed to get a small refund.

Anyway, my address and phone number have alway been searchable online. I never really answer my phone, it’s a landline and  unless it is Nanetter or MelG I don’t answer and people have been driving by the ghetto shack. Since THE SHEREE WHITFIELD SITUATION. If you are new check out that drama, it’s kind of funny. I also had a random reader call me and leave a message on my answering machine (look it up, it’s an old people thing) asking me for parenting advice one time. That was odd. So while it was a very odd thing that somehow my tax receipt was posted on the site… All of that info is already on my numerous hate sites. 🙂 Along with photos of my dead sister and other pleasantries. So of course I took it down, but it had been out there for ages. It’s all good.

I really appreciate all of you who emailed me and reached out. I have good days and bad days and currently my bathtub is streaming water out so there will be a big water bill. And the plumber guy is not coming until TUESDAY. Every day is a new drama. In other news, Marc with a C is having some struggles as well. Please pray for my birthday twin. And no he doesn’t have Covid. He’s just going through all the things we are going through. And he is just the best person. And I pray for him to have some peace, just like I do for the rest of you. Thanks for sticking by me. I am WAY behind on emails. But I promise to get through them all ASAP. I know it is a lot to ask, but do any of you have good news?

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About tamaratattles

Come for the tea. Stay for the shade. Not for the easily offended. You're a special snowflake just like everyone else.

Comments

  1. Terri says

    January 16, 2021 at 6:02 pm

    Wow, I’m glad MelG alerted you because I never saw it. I hope you & Marc will both be OK.

    Reply
    • tamaratattles says

      January 16, 2021 at 6:12 pm

      Thanks Terri. We are both going to be fine. I just worry about him a little too much. Mostly because SHIT IS HARD RIGHT NOW. For all of us. And, I love him. And miss him posting.

      Reply
      • Cheryl B. (cherylannburke1) says

        January 16, 2021 at 7:41 pm

        This is kinda a duplicate but I’ve noticed Marc has not been commenting.
        He cared about how I was, and am happy to return the favor. Be well.?

        Reply
    • Nancy Stober says

      January 16, 2021 at 6:26 pm

      Sending strength and hugs

      Reply
  2. Daintyfeets says

    January 16, 2021 at 6:34 pm

    Stay strong, Marc! One day at a time. I have been dog sitting my nephew dog for the last week and I’m enveloped with bliss and happiness when I’m with him. Somehow, some way, we bonded when he was a pup and I call him my emotional support pooch. He senses my need. My little bro, who is poppa to Harvey, gets jealous, but, ultimately, he’s cool with it.

    Reply
  3. Cheryl B. (cherylannburke1) says

    January 16, 2021 at 7:34 pm

    Oh dear Marc! You somehow became a hero in my mind. Good thoughts.?
    So Thurs my mom’s boyfriend said he wanted to be home. My mom is one tough lady and when I was talking to her (3rd time in 20 years?) She was waiting for the ambulance to bring him home. I sadly found out he passed yesterday afternoon. It was just what he wanted.
    This morning I talked to my bff since she just hasn’t been something. Bff instinct kicked in. She had emergency surgery at 1:00 for removing her appendix.
    Christmas day my aunt layed down for a nap, and didn’t wake up!?
    I wanted and did tell Chris, 2021 and one day, we can not expect a different world.
    I wonder if we need to be more sensitive, under standing and accept what we go “ahhhh” we are going to get through, stronger perhaps.
    I find myself dealing better than I possibly may have, who knows.
    I think we all seem stronger due to removing out situations and putting ourselves in each other’s good, bad, and ugly.?

    Reply
    • Terri says

      January 16, 2021 at 7:42 pm

      Oh wow, Cheryl, you’ve really had some stuff going on. I hope 2021 starts to get better for everyone.

      Reply
    • Nanette says

      January 17, 2021 at 4:55 pm

      Jeez Cheryl. I am so sorry. ? I hope this is the end of the horrible shit over for your year! ???

      Reply
  4. MelG says

    January 16, 2021 at 7:35 pm

    Sorry that everything but your bra size got posted for the world to see but, glad we got to talk.I thoroughly enjoyed talking to you. And, nope I didn’t wake the hubby up when I got off the phone to come to bed or suck his dick. I enjoyed the bed all to myself. ???

    Reply
    • tamaratattles says

      January 17, 2021 at 8:06 am

      Well when I went to the bra lady I was a 36g OR SOMETHING. And as I recall, when we talked I told you all my secrets. 🙂 Thanks for talking with me. I’m a hot mess right now,

      Reply
    • Nanette says

      January 17, 2021 at 4:57 pm

      I hear Tamara all over this “don’t wake him up” stuff! LOFL.

      Reply
    • Joey says

      January 9, 2023 at 2:15 pm

      MelG,

      Get on the current link.

      Joey

      Reply
  5. MelG says

    January 16, 2021 at 7:36 pm

    Prayers for Marc! ?

    Reply
    • tamaratattles says

      January 17, 2021 at 8:07 am

      Marc is fine and I hope he is not reading here. I just love him a lot want him to be happy.

      Reply
      • CHS DEL says

        January 18, 2021 at 1:45 pm

        I really love you guys. Even though I’m new to the group, I want you all to realize that although the struggle is quite real, I can feel we are genuinely here for each other. My husband is trying to sell our travel trailer- should be painless, right? WRONG!! People are stalking the house and doing the most! It seems like there’s always something or someone who has to try and take it thers. Luckily, I have you guys buzzing my wrist with updates which make my day. Tamara, we’re I closer I’d help with that damned water heater. Mine last year turned my garage and basement into Cypress Gardens! All the water shooting skyward made my house look like a set from an Esther Williams MGM aquacade extravaganza. Every time I see the footage of these fools at the Capitol lootfest and learn a bit more everyday of their shenanigans, I have to blow into a paper bag. It’s time to start chopping folks for bad behaviour…PERIOD. As I often have to explain to my white friends, ‘Yes! Things are bad. And being complicit is equal to being guilty. I miss shopping, hugs, traveling and I still feel more blessed than most because I am here with others in the same boat. (There’s only so much Matlock I can take).

        Anyway I just wanted to again thank everyone out there and I have to just remember to keep breathing and remember that whatever coping mechanisms I require to persevere, use them. Nothing, no matter how silly it may seem to others, is off limits. Stay strong, we’re here and we love ya!

        Reply
        • tamaratattles says

          January 18, 2021 at 1:53 pm

          First of all your peanuts avatar makes me smile every time I see it. So thank you because I was crying before and now I am smiling. And NO ONE is new here. We are all friends (except sometimes when I get ORNERY,,, ) but I tend to weed out the bad people you never see, and we all have each other back here. Everyone else is a lot nicer than me and they do good things. I even try to do good things too believe it or not. So we are not a scary good. I’m just an asshole at the door. Once you get in everything is fine! Except for when we argue and call each other bad words. So yeah,it ‘s a family. And the LURKERS are just people who haven’t joined us yet.

          Reply
          • CHS DEL says

            January 18, 2021 at 2:27 pm

            Ornery!!?! Me too, when warranted. I’m glad I could make you smile. I’m crazy as hell too. I just put on my Mr. Brown (Meet The Browns) outfit and let go! It works so far.

            Reply
  6. LuluC says

    January 16, 2021 at 7:41 pm

    Think I was asked out on a date.
    I walk my puppy once the sun goes down every night – since I moved here, see the same gentleman walking his pup – he too widowed. We chat, nightly & he offered to cook me diner when free???

    Very handsome, but I have not dated since 1995.
    I know my husband would not like me to be alone – just strange, but think since I’ve enjoyed our nightly walks & both alone….might be good for me.

    Reply
    • Lisa Cantu says

      January 16, 2021 at 7:51 pm

      Even if its just a good friend opportunity companionship is always good

      Reply
      • Luluc says

        January 16, 2021 at 9:41 pm

        We just did our nightly walk & agreed to have him cook for me tomorrow evening.

        Had baby panic attack walking back to my home. I’ve never trusted anyone, but my guy – have good instincts, yet still compromised – beyond lonely.

        And a host of legal/family dynamics going on. Will let know if he cooks well…lol

        Reply
        • tamaratattles says

          January 17, 2021 at 8:29 am

          I am ridiculously excited for you. We need all the details.

          Reply
          • Luluc says

            January 18, 2021 at 12:45 am

            So charming,
            A nice evening, just get away from my every day bullshit.

            Needed steak a wine.

            Reply
            • Kat says

              January 18, 2021 at 6:16 pm

              That’s so great, Luluc. Thanks for letting us know! It sounds like it hit just the right note for you at this point.

    • tamaratattles says

      January 17, 2021 at 8:09 am

      This is very exciting news! We need to know how it went!

      Reply
    • Nanette says

      January 17, 2021 at 4:59 pm

      Ooooooooo … juicy … romantic … I will live out my romcoms vicariously through you so PLEASE BE SURE TO REPORT BACK.

      ?????????? ??????????

      Reply
      • Luluc says

        January 25, 2021 at 8:56 pm

        So, will indulge – woke up this morning & flowers were left at my front door. He knew of my FILs passing yesterday & wanted me to see something pretty first thing.

        It’s really charming, during the height of grief – someone notices me.
        Most evenings I’m a hot mess – actually all evenings .

        He’s very kind and patient, so will as is my nature/ go slow.

        Reply
  7. LA_in_KY says

    January 16, 2021 at 9:04 pm

    My good news is I just made some delicious, bomb ass chicken fajitas. I have the good hot sauce, fresh pico, good tortillas. My belly is full and my mouth is happy.

    Reply
  8. Lucinda Meyer says

    January 16, 2021 at 10:14 pm

    I don’t talk about personal stuff here, usually keep it to the shows but I’m struggling and hope maybe some of you who are so kind might have a supportive word for me.
    I have been an animal person since I was a little girl. Have had dogs, cats, horses all my life. I’m never good at the end of life stuff. My last dog, a lab mix, was with me for 18 years and her end of life was traumatic. It was many years ago but I still cry every time I think of it.
    I have a partner now who has two English setters, Abigail Adams and Annie Oakley. The younger one, Oakley, bonded with me and he often comments about me stealing his dog.
    The older one, Abby, is going to be 12 next Valentine’s Day. The reason I am so sad and struggling right now is Abby suddenly became ill. She has been diagnosed with congestive heart failure. It manifested so fast, we are in shock. My partner is devastated. He has had her since 8 weeks. She’s started on Lasix and is breathing a little better. She has an appointment Feb 2 at a cardiologist. I’m praying what’s wrong with her heart can be treated with medication and she could still have a year or so with good quality of life.
    I can’t stop crying. Not only because I love her, and because nothing I can do or say can help my partner’s grief, but this is bringing back very bad memories of when I lost Spatz. That time was also in winter. Cold, dark, horrible weather. Today it was just sleeting with the wind whipping as we came back from the vet.
    And, of course, because of fucking covid, you can’t be in with your animal. They just take them in and bring them out. Poor Abby, three times they tried to get a sample of the fluid around her heart and we weren’t there with her.
    2021 is starting out just as shitty as last year. I’ve experienced a lot of loss in the last several years. I feel like I hardly recover before the next barrage comes.
    This just came out of the blue and has knocked the wind out of my sails.
    And, today was my birthday. Not that it’s that big a deal but it was a landmark number and had to be the worst birthday ever.
    Sorry for the long sob story. I feel kinda silly spilling my guts, but there you have it.

    Reply
    • Terri says

      January 16, 2021 at 10:26 pm

      I’m so sorry Abby is sick. I know how hard it is to lose one of our little loves. It’s devastating and the pain does stay with you forever. At least you and your partner have each other right now. I’ll pray that medication helps Abby and that she has more time with you.

      Reply
      • Lucinda Meyer says

        January 17, 2021 at 7:15 am

        Thank you. I appreciate the kind words and prayers. She made it through another night. She just needs to get to that cardiology appointment so we can find out if she can be helped.

        Reply
        • tamaratattles says

          January 17, 2021 at 8:16 am

          Well FUCK. You know I love you and I am so sad you are going through all of this. I’ve sort of abandoned the whole maybe this year might be better thing. We just all need to try to get through it.

          Reply
          • Lucinda Meyer says

            January 17, 2021 at 8:29 am

            Thanks, tt.
            I have to work 14 hours today and am trying to pull myself together so I don’t blubber my way through the day.
            Not looking good for that.

            Reply
            • tamaratattles says

              January 17, 2021 at 8:31 am

              Know that we support you as a frontline worker. I know what a strong woman you are. You can do this.

    • Luluc says

      January 16, 2021 at 10:44 pm

      I’ve never felt comfortable sharing my feelings – out loud or online.
      Have 2 to put down soon, 15/17 – can’t keep them around for you.
      It’s a gift to put them down humanely – can’t imagine a vet not let you do so. I walk on edges , my girl – every morning she’s just sleeping.

      Dogs/pets kill us – totally loyal, but sometimes we have to do what is right.

      Reply
      • Lucinda Meyer says

        January 17, 2021 at 8:21 am

        Yes, if she can’t be helped with medication we are already looking into a vet that makes house calls for hospice care and home euthanasia. We won’t let her suffer if her quality of life can’t be improved.
        Thank you for your response.

        Reply
        • Kat says

          January 17, 2021 at 9:05 am

          Lucinda- I;m crying and praying for you right now. Crying because you seem to be a person who bonds with animals on a soul level. I know how deep that goes. I hope Abby will be fixed with the medication, but if not, she will pass over to a happy place with no suffering and will STILL be with you- I believe that. Prayers are with you.

          Reply
          • Lucinda Meyer says

            January 17, 2021 at 6:14 pm

            You’re so kind. Thank you.
            Yes, it’s true from when I was a little girl I was in tune with animals. They are so innocent and loving and funny and every one has a unique personality and soul. The only “bad” ones are those that have been ruined by cruelty or neglect.

            Reply
      • tamaratattles says

        January 17, 2021 at 8:23 am

        Yeah this is all news to me. I was adopted by Banjo after my house was broken into. I didn’t even really want a dog. And now my family mocks my separation anxiety when I go to holidays. I don’t lay around petting him all day. We just sort of coexist. He is the perfect dog for me. We need to go for more walks. He gets lots of treats, and he eats liberal fancy dog food, and hates hot weather and loves winter. lol. I haven’t slept in my bed for years because I like to be in the same room with him. My internet BFF is concerned that I am not going to be able to handle it when his time comes. I didn’t think this relationship though very well. I wasn’t expecting to fall in love with him. And never thought he would die one day. Maybe he won’t?

        Reply
        • Lucinda Meyer says

          January 17, 2021 at 6:23 pm

          He choose you for a reason and it sounds like his plan worked. I’ve never had children; I don’t know what it’s like to lose one. But I know the pain of losing these beautiful little beings who come into your life and you then you can’t imagine it without them. Sometimes it’s a loss you don’t think you can bear.
          I told a friend of mine at work today what was going on and we both swiveled and hugged and I got to my break putting it out of my mind. I saw these sweet messages and wanted to respond. But now I’m crying again. Time to get back to work.
          When the day comes, tt, that Banjo traverses the rainbow bridge, I will be there for you. We all will.

          Reply
          • tamaratattles says

            January 17, 2021 at 6:49 pm

            For the love of God don’t send me the rainbow bridge thing. I hated that before I even HAD a dog. 🙂 I had a friend Pre Trump who used to sort of complain that her dog would not die. I’m probably saying that wrong. But she seemed to complain that the dog wasn’t dying. I think I kind of get that now. Banjo is getting old and it is scary and I didn’t think this whole thing thru.He’s doing great now and will probably live forever. But there are days…. when I think OH SHIT.

            Reply
            • CHS DEL says

              January 18, 2021 at 2:14 pm

              I had to read that damned rainbow bridge at a memorial service and I had never read it before. Gurl, I had a full collapse at the podium. Forget that damned bridge…Tank I are meeting at Neiman’s!

            • tamaratattles says

              January 18, 2021 at 4:28 pm

              Hey I hate that shit.

    • Deejay says

      January 17, 2021 at 8:13 am

      Saying prayers that your Abby will be well again. It’s so hard when a fur baby is sick.

      Reply
      • Lucinda Meyer says

        January 17, 2021 at 8:17 am

        Thanks for the kind words. I appreciate the support.

        Reply
    • Nanette says

      January 17, 2021 at 5:08 pm

      This is such sad news. I am so sorry. My dog is 15, so …

      I ?? Abby can be helped. IF NOTHING THE VETS DOES OR SAYS WORKS, please try CBD oil. Tuscan Naturals Simply Pure is what I give my girl 2-3 times a day. Without it, the pain of arthritis (and seeing how crestfallen she would get when she couldn’t walk the circle in the park) would have made her life difficult-to-unbearable. With it, she enjoys her walks and her meals and her sleeps. I would NOT keep her alive just because I want her here if she were in pain. But after the CBD, she bounces around like a baby bunny.

      I will remember you and your man and both dogs in my prayers. Damn that list is getting long!

      Reply
      • Lucinda Meyer says

        January 17, 2021 at 6:24 pm

        Thank you for the very kind words. I appreciate you taking the time to offer the advice as well.

        Reply
        • tamaratattles says

          January 17, 2021 at 6:51 pm

          we are all here for you and Abby. I know it sounds ridiculous to some people, but especially now, our Internet friends are all we have and they are a great support system. We care. Keep us updated.

          Reply
    • CHS DEL says

      January 18, 2021 at 1:58 pm

      Lucinda, sending you warm thoughts. My boy is 11 and I cry just thinking of when he’s gone. I’m sitting here crying and when I think how someone’s hate and selfishness is responsible for the change in our lives, it makes dealing with our inner pain even more of a struggle. Cherish every moment you have with Abby. That love between you is real and now is the time to be with Abby and tell her what you love about her. I could kill Tank for some of the stunts he pulled this weekend ( but I try to cherish his time here because that day of departure will come and as hideous as I know it’ll be, I want to remember that I have his happiness and love to carry with me until I see him later when I go. Remember, take care of yourself and give Abby a warm squeeze for me.

      Reply
    • CHS DEL says

      January 18, 2021 at 2:02 pm

      Lucinda, sending you warm thoughts. My boy is 11 and I cry just thinking of when he’ll be gone. I’m sitting here crying for your family and Abby. Then, when I think how someone’s hate and selfishness is responsible for the change in our daily lives, it makes dealing with our inner pain even more of a struggle.

      Remember, cherish every moment you have with Abby. That love between you is real and now is the time to be with Abby and tell her what you love about her. I could kill Tank for some of the stunts he pulled this weekend (but I try to cherish his time here because that day of departure will eventually come and as hideous as I know it’ll be, I want to remember that I have the happiness and love he’s given me to carry with me until I see him later when I go. Remember, take care of yourself and give Abby a warm squeeze for me. All the best, D

      Reply
  9. Marc says

    January 16, 2021 at 11:36 pm

    Thanks to all of you for the well wishes & prayers. Much appreciated I read every post but am working far too much & just haven’t been feeling up on commenting but know I read all comments on all posts & hope you are all happy safe & well. Thanks for the beautiful words of encouragement they are so thoughtful & I am so grateful for all of my friends on this great site. We will all get thru this pandemic even if it seems impossible at times. Be safe Be well. Hope 2021 gets better for all of us. xo Marc

    Reply
    • T D says

      January 17, 2021 at 12:11 am

      So good to hear your voice. Love you, t.

      Reply
    • Calipatti says

      January 17, 2021 at 2:08 am

      Hey Marc, when trying to find the words for you, Cher came to mind. Do you recall her saying, “just snap out of it” – of course those words don’t help but hoping you can see Cher’s face and hear her saying those words.
      They make me smile.
      Remember to get outside when working extra hours. No idea why but outside helps me.

      Reply
      • Kat says

        January 17, 2021 at 5:27 pm

        Yes- in “Moonstruck”- one of my favorite movies. I know that was for Marc but thanks for the smile anyway ?

        Reply
    • tamaratattles says

      January 17, 2021 at 8:26 am

      Oh there is my birthday twin! Everyone love Marc with the C. I get emails asking about you all the time! You are loved. And I know you are working so much. But we miss you!

      Reply
    • Nanette says

      January 17, 2021 at 5:11 pm

      Oh good! You replied before I even read this!

      I hope with all of the hours you are working that you can put aside some money for a FABULOUS VACATION when traveling is safe again!

      X?X ?X ?X ?X ?X ?X ?X ?X ?X ?X ?X ?X

      Reply
  10. Jen says

    January 17, 2021 at 9:16 am

    Please get some therapy for your past trauma. ❤️ It is really heartbreaking watching you self destruct on here over the years. I only say this because I see some of my own old patterns in your behavior and know there is help if you want to stop and break those old patterns that are no longer serving you. Those coping mechanisms that helped you get through hard/scary times in your past served a purpose to help you survive frightening times, but now those coping mechanisms are only causing you pain and holding you back from your potential. Open Path Collective dot org has low cost therapy options for people who don’t have insurance or are underinsured. I know you’re hurting and I’m sorry. Much love to you.

    Reply
    • tamaratattles says

      January 17, 2021 at 6:11 pm

      Thanks for offering help. I usually do okay but it is just a new scary thing everyday. I’ve been to therapy. I don’t take much stock in it, I tell you guys everything. So talking about it isn’t really the answer. I’m always afraid and the pandemic, riots, and every other issue is just too fucking much. I am self destructing a bit AGAIN.But I will beat this. I’m sorry to use you all as therapists. I’m probably just way more open about the crazy than y’all are because I talk about it way too much. I’ll get through this. I always do.

      Reply
      • Kat says

        January 18, 2021 at 6:32 pm

        Your being open about the crazy is a gift. It opens the door for everyone else to do some much needed venting and feel like a family. So please never think you talk about stuff with us “too much”. I can relate to the feelings about therapy. That said, if you ever sort of stay “stuck” in the really bad place, and talking to us is not enough, I think we all care enough to want you to seek out any other thing that might help. We don’t want to be selfish.

        Reply
  11. Coco says

    January 17, 2021 at 10:35 am

    Long time reader but have only commented twice. I’m writing about your hot water running constantly in your bathtub. If you go to your hot water heater and turn the lever, you will at least turn the hot water off. Letting it run will lead to a large electric bill.
    You can also turn the water off completely if you know which switch/lever to pull.
    It will be inconvenient but at least it will stop until you can get a plumber.
    I check into your site every day and always enjoy your recaps and comments.

    Reply
    • tamaratattles says

      January 17, 2021 at 6:04 pm

      Thanks Coco. I’ll try to figure out how to shut my hot water heater off. THIS IS DRIVING ME CRAZY.

      Reply
  12. Allyson says

    January 17, 2021 at 2:14 pm

    Hello all,

    I don’t comment often but I am so grateful for this site in this community. I get so many laughs and love the fact that there is such a sense of community and support.

    Just wanted to thank you all and say God bless and stay strong. Covid has to end at some point right?

    Reply
    • Nanette says

      January 17, 2021 at 5:14 pm

      It WILL end. Just like the Spanish Flu in 1918. We just need to hold on and stay home and keep the faith and gather virtually. So easy to SAY …

      ? ? ? ? ?to better days ahead!

      Reply
  13. SleepyP says

    January 17, 2021 at 5:53 pm

    Hey TT any inclinations on what braunwyn said to Stella?

    Reply
    • tamaratattles says

      January 17, 2021 at 6:14 pm

      Sorry I have been off duty for a bit. I am not really current with the news.

      Reply
  14. jojersey says

    January 19, 2021 at 7:43 am

    Well I’m days late as usual but gonna throw this out there. Currently I have a lab who is 11 and a boxer/bulldog mix who is 9. this issue is if somehow the lab outlives the boxer because simply put the lab will need to be put day. The boxer is the lab’s emotional support dog, those who think I’m kidding are welcome to come hang out when the boxer leaves the room and lab notices the whales and cries are unreal! Lab cannot be alone for any amount of time! She will not follow you room to room but you best invite her by name or she will cry in the other room, she’s not too smart I guess. My deepest prayer is that pass together to stay together. Lab will not survive if boxer goes first.

    Reply
    • tamaratattles says

      January 22, 2021 at 1:57 am

      well that is said and cute all at once. This will come to a surprise to NO ONE but I am not good at relationships. So I am sure my relationship with Banjo isn’t normal. We don’t do much together especially during COVID. I almost killed him once taking him on a very long hike with no water. I’m not the best dog parent in the world. I haven’t slept in my bed in YEARS. Because for a while in the beginning he would wake me up in the night to go outside. I’m kind of a sleepwalker and I could let him out and fall asleep before letting him back in. So I wake up a lot in the middle of the night, like now and check for him to still be breathing. I dread the day the answer to that is no. We shouldn’t be able to have dogs if they are just going to die on us. I think we both should die together too. Because… I don’t know how I am going to deal with it. It’s my longest relationship.

      Reply
  15. Lucinda Meyer says

    January 27, 2021 at 9:34 am

    Hello everyone. Update on Abby.
    Very bad news I’m afraid. She had her cardiology appointment yesterday. Turns out she has hemangiosarcoma on her heart. There’s really no good outcome here. She could have a pericardial tap which is a risky procedure to draw fluid out of the pericardium which would relieve pressure off her heart. Temporary benefit, would have to be repeated. Surgery to remove the tumor is possible. Also very risky. And there is high probability the cancer has already spread since these tumors are vascular in nature, especially on the heart. It’s like the cancer is on a superspreader highway when it’s on the heart. Usually by the time these tumors are discovered they have already metastasized.
    Jon is devastated and struggling with what to do. Even if she has the surgery, which is open chest and takes a lot of recovery, it may not improve her life span over not doing anything at all.
    I’ve spared no expense sometimes for animals when that wasn’t the right thing to do. I spent $12,000 I didn’t have at University of Pennsylvania in Philadelphia on an 18 year old dog who had to be put to sleep in the hospital after weeks of unsuccessful treatment there. It was awful. I was alone, my mother had just died, my partner at the time was in Afghanistan and totally unreachable. I didn’t know what to do and just kept thinking I can’t stop treatment because something might work and I’d have more time with her. But our time was up and I couldn’t accept it.
    And so she spent her last weeks without being at home, without me there all the time, that sweet girl who had been inseparable from me for over 18 years. I am sobbing uncontrollably as I write this, the sorrow and guilt I feel is still overpowering when I think of it.
    I don’t want Jon to ever feel this way. I will support whatever decision he makes. I know he feels like if she doesn’t get the surgery he’s betraying her by not giving her a chance to survive this. My heart is breaking for him and his beloved Abby. There is no good solution, no clear answer one way or the other.
    I will keep you posted.
    And thanks again for all your kind words.

    Reply
    • Luluc says

      January 27, 2021 at 3:04 pm

      Very sorry for Jon – never easy.
      I myself made the decision to put down my 17yr old Red Heeler next week.
      No illness – just old age & I have to help her stand up and move around. Most of the day she lays in one spot.
      It’s time , quality of life is gone – can see in here eyes.

      She’s been my guard dog, fiercely loyal – followed me every where.
      Figured one final spoiled weekend & sit by her side as she goes to sleep. It’s the right thing to do.

      Reply
      • Lucinda Meyer says

        January 27, 2021 at 7:37 pm

        Luluc, I am very sorry you’re at that time. I understand your sorrow and appreciate your compassion. Give your pup a treat for me.
        Thank you for your kindness.

        Reply
  16. Terri says

    January 27, 2021 at 1:21 pm

    I’m so sorry about Abby. That’s such devastating news. My heart breaks for you and you and Jon.

    Reply
    • Lucinda Meyer says

      January 27, 2021 at 7:46 pm

      Terri, it was shocking news. Cancer was not on my radar at all. I’ve spoken with close friends of mine, one has been a vet for 40 years the other did bloodwork for a veterinary practice for years, and both said the same thing: hemangiosarcoma is a bad motherfucker. The prognosis is poor no matter what we do.
      Yes, my heart breaks for both Jon and his beloved Abby. We are slowly coming to terms with this and have a plan that keeps her best interests in mind.
      Thank you for your kind comment.

      Reply
  17. Lucinda Meyer says

    February 4, 2021 at 7:16 pm

    ABBY IS GONE

    I don’t know if anyone is still following this but I wasn’t sure where else to let people know. And the people who were so kind deserved to know what has happened.

    The pericardial tap was Monday. She went through it like a champ, they didn’t even have to sedate her. The bad news was there was significantly more fluid on Monday than the previous Tuesday. That was disappointing. But she seemed immediately better. She was doing well, eating some solid food, seemed bright and breathing was okay.

    Yesterday I noticed she seemed more lethargic but she was eating. This morning she had one of those weird hacking reaching episodes. After that she went downhill. Breathing was labored, she peed while awake but laying down (her incontinence from being on the Lasix had always been while she was sleeping). She got worse, wouldn’t get up. Jon called the vet hospital while I called the vet who makes house calls to euthanize animals at home. Vets said based on symptoms she was decompensating rapidly and there was nothing more to do. The household vet said she could be here at 2.

    Jon spent the time laying with her, holding her, talking to her telling her how much he loved her. Oakley (the younger dog) lay with them, her head on Jon’s legs or waist.

    When the vet arrived she assessed her and agreed it was time. Abby’s feet and legs were cold, gums ashen, heartbeat muffled. The tumor was probably bleeding rapidly. So surrounded by her pack, on the floor of the great room where she so often slept,with the fire going, with a few errant snowflakes drifting down outside, she went to sleep for the final time.

    We took her with her constant companion Oakley for her last car ride. We took her to her regular vet who is going to take care of her now.
    We kissed her one more time before they took her.

    The house is quiet tonight except for the sounds of the fire and Jon and I sobbing.

    Thank you again, all who were so kind. I hope I can do the same for you if you ever need it.

    Reply
    • LuluC says

      February 5, 2021 at 12:26 pm

      Very sorry of Abby’s passing – Should find peace, your whole pack was with her as she passed.

      Reply
      • Sam says

        February 5, 2021 at 1:15 pm

        Oh god. I am sorry to hear this. I can’t think about it too much as my dog is 10. Just wanted to say I feel your pain. No kids here. Just dogs. They don’t get to be here long enough but it is so worth it. I look at photos and my heart fills with love and memories even years after we’ve said goodbye. I hope you all find peace. It’s hard to let go but you know when it’s time.

        Reply
        • Lucinda Meyer says

          February 6, 2021 at 8:23 am

          Thank you Sam for your kind words. I appreciate you taking the time to respond. No children for us either, it’s always been the fur babies. They are such sweet little souls, filled with love.
          I know we made all the right decisions but the kindest thing you can do for them is the hardest thing on you.
          Thank you again for your kindness.

          Reply
      • Lucinda Meyer says

        February 6, 2021 at 8:30 am

        Thank you LuluC. Abby is running free now with a strong heart, with all the pack that has gone before.
        Thank you for your kindness.

        Reply
        • LuluC says

          February 6, 2021 at 5:23 pm

          We have not agreed on many topics, but I’m a dog mom – no kids by choice.
          They literally provide such love, not sure sometimes we deserve.
          The best thing we can do, as I have 3 senior dogs – provide proper care & comfort.

          Reply
          • Lucinda Meyer says

            February 6, 2021 at 9:58 pm

            No children by choice for me as well but have had dogs, horses, and cats all my life. Every loss breaks my heart. It takes a special person to care for senior pets so you must certainly be one. Thanks for putting aside our differences to share what we have in common, the love of our dear, sweet animals.

            Reply
  18. Terri says

    February 4, 2021 at 10:20 pm

    Oh Lucinda, I’m so sorry. I can’t even see what I’m typing because I’m crying so hard. Please tell Jon how sorry I am. Take care.

    Reply
    • Lucinda Meyer says

      February 6, 2021 at 8:26 am

      Thank you Terri for such a sweet response. I appreciate your kindness and I will relay your condolences to Jon.
      Thanks again for being so supportive.

      Reply

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