Well we are certainly living in interesting times, Americans. So perhaps it is for the best that RHOC is sofa king boring this year. Oddly, despite how much we seem to dislike it, their ratings are actually pretty decent. Tonight’s RHOC recap will cover Elizabeth’s childhood abuse, Shannon and John’s relationship issues and how Braunwyn’s latest fake storyline ripped from the headlines is affecting her marriage. Sound good? Well, that’s what we’ve got. Shannon is packing Sophie off to Baylor.
She has bought headboards and pillows and having her tailor make her bedspread. Shannon can’t pronounce Waco. Sophie has no idea what she is getting into at that Christian school. She won’t last a year. Sophie is dying to get
away from Shannon out of Newport Beach. BTW, Archie has been really sick lately.
Sad, Broken People
It seems, given the circumstances of the day, that recapping Braunwyn’s bullshit storyline is even a bigger waste of time than usual. Sean needs to take all seven kids and move out. Braunwyn is clearly spending all her time with her “girlfriends” and not parenting at all, so SHE should just move out. She not a mother, she’s a surrogate. It seems like Braunwyn has a lot of time on her hands to investigate people and gossip. This week her target appears to be Shannon and John. Apparently, John got super wasted at a golf tournament and his dad had to come get him. Braunwyn told Emily who told Gina. Gina is worried about Shannon and John’s drinking.
Elizabeth’s brother is in town. Now these two can talk about how abusive their childhoods were. I’ll spare you the details. Elizabeth has never spoken to her mother about this. But it looks like we will be going to therapy with her. Oh. Joy. What does Elizabeth always have a hat on?
Kelly and Jolie go to the ugliest beach in the world. Jolie says that Kelly is way too strict. She does all the chores, she makes straight As, and she has no freedom. Jolie thinks Rick is the reason she is in such a good place now. He makes her a lot happier. Somehow, Jolie has turned out to be a bright, kind young lady.
News From Newport
Shannon and John have been apart for three weeks due to Covid. John has a cool dog. Shannon is a bit concerned about her drinking in the past. She feels bad for taking her fears and aggression out on him. She’s trying not to be so reactive. For whatever reason, John loves Shannon. So,it seems like they are good. They are ready to spend a night together.
Gina talks to her boyfriend about Matt. Matt refused his plea deal so he will probably be going to trial. He has a pre-trial coming up. Gina is upset that he is not willing to admit what he did. It makes her feel like what she went through is being diminished. Because it is.
Emily goes to Elizabeth’s house for lunch on the patio overlooking the ocean. Elizabeth shares her childhood cult situation with Emily since she wasn’t at Lake Arrowhead. Elizabeth says she facetimed with Braunwyn to talk and she totally tuned her out. So, Elizabeth is already over Braunwyn. Emily can’t stand Braunwyn either. I think it is unanimous. Now that Elizabeth is divorced, Emily asks if she is having sex with Jimmy who is like five feet away The answer, if you care, is yes.
I hate Braunwyn so much. Now she has her bimbos over to talk shit about Sean. How does she go to two AA meetings a day when all she does hang out with her friends?
Kelly stops by to visit Shannon. Shannon got her final payment from David and left the check laying out so Kelly would see it. It’s $1.4 million dollars. Kelly says, “That goes by fast.” Really? Shannon says that during COVID she was drinking too much and fighting with John while drinking a tumbler of tequila. Kelly tells Shannon that Gina said she was worried about her. Shannon is pissed. She says she hasn’t heard from Gina in three months. Then Kelly says that Braunwyn and Sean are on the verge of divorce.
Next week is the finale! YAY! Sean moves out, Elizabeth sees a therapist, and everyone gets together for a drunken beach party.