Oh hey! I was up all night drinking wine and arguing about politics on Twitter and just woke up for the day as Below Deck is ending. Ooops. I missed the Saturn and Venus thing, seeing what superpowers everyone got, and Below Deck. I’m trying to stop stressing about my sleep schedule and just rolling with it to see if that would get me back on track and well, so far that is not working. I also went begging for clean underpants. Because wine. And um, I kind of need clean underpants. And yes. Yes I am losing my marbles. So let’s get on this Below Deck Recap a couple of hours late. I warn you I am sleep recapping this.

Eat My Cooter
Oh, okay, I am trying to wake up now. I forgot that were left off with Rachel bailing on the trip. Let’s see if we got her back yet. Our hero, Captain Lee is working on the issue four hours before the guests arrive. At least Captain Lee’s cracked ribs seem to be doing better. Rob shows up to be the new deckhand. He seems smarter than paper straw guy already. So that is one problem solved. Then Rachel shows back up to beg for her job. Captain Lee has no options. So…Sheeee’s baaaaaaaack!
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Rob is hot with a fascinating back story full of pirates and hookers. Elizabeth is still dragging ass as “second stew.” And the charter guests from hell have arrived. Oh look! Joe Biden is talking to us Georgians. We seem to have the weight of the country on our shoulders at this point. Anyway, the guests are straight out of central casting. And they are all over the top gays. Now everything makes sense. I love them already. They seem really happy already. They are going to be pussy cats. I love how they keep repping Whispering Angel rose. Someone in Beverly Hills must be fuming…
Miss Rona Makes Her Presence Known
Okay, I am almost awake now which means I’ll be up until noon again. Eddie cracks me up with his spot on Trump impression. The guests are going to be my favorites ever. They have named their giant unicorn floaties. That is really all they need. And booze. Elizabeth needs to focus on her job and ignore James. Her job depends on it. Oh the crazy clothes on these guests. It’s Mardi Gras night. Rachel is cooking her ass off to redeem herself. Cracking up at the “Hercules!” hand claps about dinner. This is my favorite episode ever. I hate that I slept through it. Dinner ends with a king cake. Rachel is a fucking rock star.
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Francesca continues to stir the pot with her stews. She’s pissed that the Mardi Gras decorations are still up. Rachel continues to suck up to Captain Lee. French toast will do the trick. Good bye Cheerios, hello apology breakfasts. Of course nothing can go perfectly. The slide isn’t going up properly. Captain Lee wants to be superman and hang off the boat with cracked ribs to grab a line. I bet his bride whacked him upside the head when she saw this. 🙂 But he does save the day. And set his ribs back another week.
I Can Handle My Own Clam
It looks like Rachel is going to give of the Low Country Boil we didn’t get on Southern Charm this week. Anyone can do a low country boil. The important part is the spice mix. She keeps calling it a “country boil.” Close enough for a yankee I guess. She has put out an eight course dinner of Michelin star quality and yet a low country boil seems to be concerning her. Rob tries to flirt with the stews but his game is super weak. Did I just hear that Rachel is putting clams in the low country boil? That’s kind of sacreligious.
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I don’t see the lemons in there. Or corn. Or the billions of shrimp. I’m sure this will be delicious, but it is not a low country boil. There were whole lobsters! I’m not saying it isn’t fantastic. It’s not a low country boil, it’s a high end seafood feast! Next up is a beach bonfire. This is the best charter ever on Below Deck. Gays, rosé all day, bonfires, Maine lobsters, it’s perfect. So of course we need to make Elizabeth look like an idiot again. She brought just one bottle of rosé to the beach? That’s enough for me alone on the tinder ride over! Elizabeth continues to fail.
The Devil You Know…
Captain Lee lets the stews still on the boat play on the slide. Rachel continues to worm her way into Captain Lee’s heart through his stomach. It’s working. I mean I think she can probably get whatever she wants from people with her cooking skills. Francesca and Captain Lee talk about replacing Elizabeth.
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He says sometimes the devil you know is better than a random draw. Next week, Rachel has an even more challenging menu to put out. I have every confidence in her. Sorry for the delay tonight. I just can’t get my days and night straight. My plan to stop stressing about it and just go with it failed miserably.
Don’t feel bad (badly? I NEVER remember which is correct!), because you’re always the first or one of the first Below Deck recaps that I see on the web! Most reality Tv blogs seem to publish recaps the next day -so you’re ahead of the game! Also, I’m on a similar sleep schedule half the time, so you are NOT alone! Thanks for all of your recaps & editorials this year. You provided some great (sometimes hilarious) insights into this crazy year, & certainly made mine a little brighter! Thank you, Tamara! Best wishes this holiday season! My first alone since I lost my partner of 12 yrs, may he RIP. I’ll stop by & visit again soon!?❤️✌??
My ad rep, BTW the commenting problem should be fixed now, seemed to be hoping for me to be with loved ones at Christmas. I felt like I was trying to oversell being home alone. LOL.
I am so sorry for your loss. And if you are used to spending the holidays with someone you love it must be awful to be alone. But I kind of love missing the family drama. No pressure to make a dish and get your shit together and show up. If you enjoy a formulaic holiday movie, drinking champagne alone and laying about in your jammies or sweats, it can be a whole lot of fun. I loved my Thanksgiving dinner I made a cornish hen. I am making another on Friday. I have two more in the freezer! lol they come in packs of two for about ten bucks. They are not frozen so I cook one and freeze one.
I was straightening up my freezer
and came across eleventy billion dollars of duck fois gras I was gifted. I am more of a goose liver pate in the little gold tins I cannot find anymore (MY Kingdom to anyone who can find this. The tagline was something like the little golden can that travels the world) It’s been decades since I saw those anywhere and the were in a low to mid ranged price grocery store chain that no longer exists. Anyway so I have a lot of very expensive duck fois gras that someone sent me from D’Artagnan my favorite rich people meat shop. And I am going to shove fois gras under the skin and in the cavity with my usual mediterranean blend. Cornish hens went out in the 70s and Patricia would call them declasse but I am bringing the Cornish hen back!
Oh and Joy Behart (sp?) recently gave everyone a lesson about feeling bad. Do you feel sad? Or sadly? Bad is correct. 🙂 Sorry for rambling. I’m a little drunk. lol.
Thanks Tamara. You’re a real peach! Sorry, but it’s In my head from watching Its a Wonderful Life last night/today! You gotta love a good Jimmy Stewart movie!
Maybe most people know this, but I watched a special recently about the making of that movie. Bedford Falls is based on a real little charming town in upstate NY, but that’s not where it was filmed. It was filmed in Malibu of all places!?
How did your Cornish hen come out with the pate under the skin? Sounds delicious! Cheers to you & all your readers for a Happy Boxing Day tomorrow (another excuse to drink w/no guilt lol! ✌?❤️ ??
I love these guests! The crew is shaping up too. The new pirate is my type — if I were decades younger!
I understand that the preference sheet was extreme, BUT IT’S A FUCKING VACATION ON A SUPERYACHT! This is WHY people pay a shiteton of money for a few days. As Tom Checketts said, ON NO OTHER YACHT do they go over the preference sheet a mere day befire the charter! Organization is key. Elizabeth is the antithesis of organized, oops! The guests are so gracious about everything. I loved that popsicle shirt suit. These guys are fun!
Eddie makes me laugh. I wish he would be back next season with a REAL DECK CREW!
One more thing: Why does “eat my cooter!” sound so much more vulgar than “suck a bag of dicks”?
I think Rachel was panicking about the virus. It was already really bad in Italy and it Is hard to care about people’s petty demands when real life or death issues are happening at home and you are far away and may not be able to get home.
You’re right, I read a receipt interview and she said that was the real reason that she freaked out. She said at that point Europe had started locking down and the tv crew was not acting like COVID was anything to be concerned about and she was rightfully scared. She should have screamed about that on camera instead of the preference sheet.
Oh Tamara, we’ve all been there. Just not as hilariously as you have! Nothing to forgive, bubbie. You are more than worth anything.
I, too, kinda love these guests. They were fun and appreciative and SUPER GAY! At least they were overly demanding & rude like Charlie & that obnoxious gang he brought along on that first charter!
I had no doubt Rachel would return. But certainly understood her reaction beforehand. She is a rock star with food. Rib seems like he’s nice and a good fit. But Lordy, am I sick of whiny Elizabeth. If she spent as much time doing her job as she does sharing her personal pity party with everyone else, she might be ok. But Lord, she just complains and complains
And the reason she always gets caught talking about Francesca is because she is ALWAYS
TALKING ABOUT FRANCESCA. And ONE bottle of rose? When it had been shared how demanding these guys were gonna be? How about a little less mantra and a bit more opening those ears. Ashling is so normal I have to worry if a) something horrible is going to happen to her or b) we’re gonna find out she’s really DB Cooper.
If I was Capt. Lee, I would be looking for another chef, then fire Rachel. I have lost all respect for him letting her talk to him like she did. I also think that she was drinking before she walked off the boat. They kept showing her drinking something. She seems like a mean drunk.
Eddie’s Trump impression made me wake up my kids, I laughed so hard!
Izzy and Elizabeth are getting on my nerves. They think Howard Johnson service is what these people are paying for. They complain because Francesca wants super yacht service from them. No wonder Izzy went to the deck crew. I cringed watching Elizabeth pouring the champagne and then hearing Francesca say something about it. Never fails that there is always someone who wants the rank but not the responsibility. Also if your boss catches you talking about her not just once, but twice, then stop talking to everyone and start talking to HER! I’m sure Elizabeth can be a hard worker in a less high end setting. This isn’t it for her.
Rachel is a rockstar! What I wouldn’t give for a meal by her. Tommy Boy Wonder – the exit is behind your ass, to the left, if I even bother to care about you. Malaria is up there somewhere. Take her too.
Thanks for the recap. I haven’t watched yet. I love Capt Lee and watch mainly because of him. I watch with a different mindset than I did yrs back. Now, when I watch I’m thinking “was the blow up all Rachel or did production have a hand in it…was the preference sheet all from the guests or did production edit it…”
When Kate was on WWHL she said she’s worked w/Rachel multiple times and Rachel does this…blows up, walks off, comes back. So, in reality was Capt Lee prepared for this? We know how close he & Kate are.
Now that we’ve seen these guests, I can totally see them putting together the preference sheet with great excitement and not realizing they were asking for too much. I can see them saying, what do we want? Ooo – how about this? How about that? What about you? Oh, good idea, let’s write that down! They certainly seem appreciative of everything they get.
And so far, it seems that Rachel CAN do it.
TT, I am so with you on mixed up sleep. I used to be fine on 6 hours. Now, I’m struggling with an alarm going off at 8ish to get myself out of bed by 9. I sleep until 11 every Saturday and I love that it’s not messing up any plans because there are no plans. I agree with your latest thought- not to stress about it. Think of yourself as providing excellent customer service to your fellow insomniacs.
To everyone on here — Hope you all are staying safe and find moments of joy during this holiday season!!!
I watched several episodes of this show on YouTubeTV, primarily because I crewed a sailing yacht for a high net worth individual in my mid-20s. He didn’t need to charter his boat for tax reasons, or to cover any costs. The millions we spent were as important to him as giving a few hundred billion treasury dollars to our enemies is to Nancy Pelosi. We did entertain a few of his friends and associates on board, and we did have a crew member who’d had a Le Cordon Bleu education. Thank God the world wasn’t as obsessed with enabling entitled psychopaths back in 1997. Special dietary requirements would have been a great way to ensure that you weren’t welcome to laugh with the wise and dine with the rich.
Nonetheless, the job was no joke. The owner liked making passages, and we also had to get the boat wherever he wanted to board it. I know what its like to break your ribs leaving a harbor on a long passage in sharks-tooth waves, and it is challenging to meet professional standards when you’re in too much pain to sleep for several consecutive nights on a pitching boat. I’m not completely unsympathetic to the trials of some of the crew members on the show, but I am shocked at how their upbringings have failed to prepare them for the world. They really do think that saying they’re achieving their potential should be the final defense for being miserable failures. Pathetic. It’s also interested that the heads of the various disciplines on the boats usually claim to have started out at a time when it was normal to be treated harshly and expected to perform. Does this mean parents and teachers have gotten even worse than they were when the millennials were being malformed?
You and I think a lot alike!
When I watch this show I am always thinking how these young kids are snowflakes and yet have so much less common sense than we did at their age. What went wrong?
My husband is less than 10 years out from his subspecialty medical training and because they put new rules in place the medical students/residents/fellows don’t have to put in the same time. They are coddled, which can be nice, but they also learn less and have less experience, which is not so nice. He is constantly shocked at how little they know and he is at a major, esteemed medical center. I am not saying they are at the level seen on BD, but it is another example in the real world of my constant state of perplexmxent when I see people in their early 20s.
I called my captain tonight to tell him about the show, which he chastised me for watching. The incident when I broke my ribs happened several months into my time on the boat, but it may have been the first passage I made with the owner aboard. I know it wasn’t my best work, since I was almost catatonic. The owner kept wanting to talk to me about orthogonal polynomials and Coxeter groups in the hope of picking my brain for ideas that might be applied to analyzing derivatives, but I was practically catatonic from lack of sleep. I also dozed off on watch at least once, because sitting up took the weight off of my ribs. Overall, it was the worst performance in my decades of sailing. Somehow I impressed the owner anyway, who kept convincing me to come back season after season. Eventually I had enough though, and bailed off the boat in Cancun because I didn’t want to take my chances with the barbed urethral parasites of Belize.
It has long been known among doctors that social justice meant plenty of 007s being issued. It’s horrible that most people admitted to medical schools today are probably less qualified than the first students admitted for non-qualification reasons.
You are a piece of shit. What the fuck does Nancy Pelosi have to do with this? Your boy Trump has hundreds of millions of dollars to pay back to his Russian masters. I wonder how he’s going to come up with the cash? Oh right, by taking cash for pardons and selling secrets to foreign countries.
i finally watched this. What is wrong with these yachties? How weak are they? Elizabeth seems to think she wins an award for just showing up. She is either being told to act stupid or she just is. Rachel? Completely unprofessional. She’s a fantastic chef but a weak person. The ONLY one who seems to act like an adult is Eddie and Izzy. All the others just complain about working. These guests are hilarious. Love them!
All chefs are this way. The better they are the more egotistical and batshit crazy they are. Sadly the females are the only ones trashed for it.
I think this belief is a product of reality television. There’s no correlation between food quality and psychopathy, although mean-spirited lunatics who can’t cook have a hard time hanging onto employment as chefs.
I also don’t understand how you can say that females are the only ones trashed for being horrible at being people. Who doesn’t trash male chefs for bad behavior? I used to watch Top Chef with a group of friends; male and female. Everyone cheered against the jerks of both genders. Rachel embarrassed herself by going full Tourettes over a completely ridiculous preference sheet. That happened. She also revealed herself as a mean and unstable drunk on another occasion. She was under a lot of stress, but nobody used to like an excuse.
Have you seen “Below Deck: Sailing Yacht” yet? Their chef is a catalog of personality flaws, and also a man. I have a great deal more contempt for him than I do for Rachel. I think I’d rank her mid pack among the BD chefs I’ve seen.
When I was crewing, I hooked up with the chef from the power yacht that tied up next to us during Januaries in Palm Beach. I had just rejoined the boat after being away for a few months. The first night the two crews went out, I could tell there was some friction between her and her captain. I intervened when she angered some bikers as her captain slunk away, and she spent the rest of our time together trying to get me to say I loved her while destroying my two year old friendship with her captain. I learned that she had been involved with her captain before I got there, but she was going through court-ordered anger management treatment for trying to kill him with a wine bottle while he slept. It didn’t cost her the job, and she didn’t serve time.
Clearly you have never waited tables or worked in a restaurant in you life. Chef are ALL BATSHIT CRAZY and think they are gods.
And maybe some of them are.
I appreciate your input as a yachtie. But I find it hard to believe that you don’t realize that chefs are arrogant as fuck. And also that you don’t understand how production works.
I am far from a Rachel fan… but she is par for the course.
My first job was in a restaurant when I was 14 years old. There was a male manager who was memorably awful, as was the waitress he was involved with. A coworker who had spent much of his life in an asylum tried to kill me with a butcher knife, but he was a dishwasher. After all these years I don’t remember the cooks as individuals, but I also never had a problem with any of them or saw them abusing the front of the house. They used to misprepare the best dishes occasionally so they’d be sent back and we could eat them because we were charged for our meals.
I shared an oceanfront place with a male chef about a decade ago. Many people think his food is exceptional, although I’ve had better. He is still the chef at a restaurant a buddy of mine is a partner in, but they probably aren’t going to survive California’s use of COVID-19. As a person? He was a little entitled, but well within parameters of people I interact with professionally on a regular basis. He maintained friendships with quite a few waitresses from his previous restaurants and used to host fantastic parties where he prepared an extra set of appetizers, entrées and even drinks that were gluten-free for someone’s wife he probably wanted.
When you suggest that I don’t know how production works, to what are you referring? I understand that they hammer their soundbites into their script to support their narrative, but Rachel clearly gave them material to work with, just as the chef on the sailing yacht did, or the gaslighting twerpy bosun who was cheating on his girlfriend with Rocky in a past season. Production creates drama and picks heros and villains, but some characters make being vilified easier than others.
Chefs are assholes. I agree that production plays that up. But it’s just a fact. Rachel will come out of this as a fan favorite eventually, just like Kiko. 🙂 Female chefs always get way more criticism than male chefs who are the same way.
I always say that when they got a job they didn’t know they had to work.
And how is it possible for the House Majority Leader to give away hundreds of billions of dollars to our enemies? I’m pretty sure she hasn’t had any authority to do such a thing for the past 4 years… unless you get all of your news from Newsmax and Brietbart. ?
Jim, what is wrong with you and your off topic rants? Last time I checked this was supposed to be about Below Deck. Carson added insightful personal yachting experience and all you can do is call names and attack? I hope things turn around in your life so you are not so angry so you can stop attacking strangers discussing reality TV.
If you follow the thread you will see it was a response to CarsonX who inserted a jab at Nancy Pelosi in his post for no valid reason. Responding to someone else’s post is not off-topic
Y’all don’t make me pull this car over! LOL.
Also, I cannot wait to return to hating the hell out of Nancy Pelosi. I’ll have plenty of hate to go around once Trump GTFO.
I have been a chef. Here are reasons why most (but not moi! LOL) are a bit cra-cra:
1. They spend most of their time on their feet. For hours & hours. And then more hours.
2. They are usually in a constant hot environment what with the stove & oven being used.
3. There are VERY sharp objects – knives, mandolins – that are being used so concentration is required or oops! Mental concentration is as exhausting as the physical.
4. Constant interruptions/demands
5. Pertaining to these yacht chefs – they have to do EVERYTHING. No sous chefs to chop the onions or make the sauces or restock. They have to do everything. It’s rare to see footage of them ever sitting down & until last season’s BDMed, I’ve never seen any one of them take a real break much less a nap like that wanker Tom.
6. The culinary arts is just that – art. Not only does the food have to be diverse & delicious, it has to plated beautifully. Oh and Artists are crazy.
It’s absolutely true that chefs can be real pricks and divas. But they are also under extreme pressure from the moment they put their apron on until they remove it.
Them’s the facts, Jack.
Oh I get it. But many of them do think they are gods. And well… maybe they are! 🙂
I have been a chef. Here are some reasons why some chefs (but not moi!LOL) are kinda cra cra:
1. They are on their feel for hours & hours
Then more hours.
2. They spend most of their time in extremely hot environments from the stove to the oven.
3. They work with extremely sharp objects – knives, mandolins- so have to concentrate at all times or…oops! Mental concentration is as exhausting as the physical.
4. On yachts, the chefs have to do EVERYTHING. There’s no sous chef to chop the onions, make the sauces, stock the pantry, etc.
5. With the exception of BDMed last season, I’ve never seen a chef take a real break during the day/night and except for that wanker
Tom -take a nap during the day. There are always preparations that need to be done, stocks to make, etc.
6. The culinary arts is just that – art. Not only does the food have to be delicious and coordinate, it also has to be beautifully plated. That is art. Oh and artists are crazy.
7. Yes some chefs are arrogant, selfish pricks & bastards, but the responsibility to not kill someone or make someone sick is very real.
Thems the facts, Jack.