I am not sure about tonight’s 90 Day Fiance recap. I think it is basically going to be a recap of the past relationships of these people. But, I guess I need this, but I am not sure you guys do. So we shall see where this goes.
Brandon & Julia
Julia needs to turn the fuck around and go home. Brandon’s mommy is never going to let this happen. She is way worse that Colt’s mommy, Debbie. His parents awkwardly stand by at the airport while they kiss. Why could they not let him have this moment? Then production asks Brandon who the most important person in his life is. He doesn’t answer. It’s clearly mama.
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Brandon’s mom is of course running the whole evening. Julia just wants to stay in the hotel room with Brandon. But mommy dearest has dinner reservations. Julia seems really into Brandon but her mother is going to fuck it all up. It seems like they had sex before dinner maybe? Mom lays down the law about separate rooms. Julia says they should get married tomorrow. Then, Mom says that basically that she needs to get on birth control. Brandon’s mother is a nutbar. Brandon doesn’t stand up for Julia. Julia gets to the hotel room with Brandon. Things are very tense already. He mother is a cockblocker. Julia already wants to leave. Oh! Mommy paid for her flight. No sex for him tonight…
Mike & Natalie
I can’t believe that Mike kicked out uncle Beau for Natalie. That sucks. He is off to live with his brother for now. The Ukraine looks beautiful. I may have to add it to my list. Natalie’s mom is so sweet and supportive. I really want this couple to work. But we already know it doesn’t. What is in that long black carry on???
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Mike seems a little bit excited to pick Natalie up from the airport. So there’s that. Sigh. He brought flowers. I’m not sure why this flower thing is an actual thing. There is luggage, there is exhaustion. Maybe flowers at the house when you get home? It just seems like one more thing to me. OH! the thing in the black carry on that appeared to be checked is a snowboard. Who knew? These two go to a nice hotel for their first night. Natalie doesn’t like her “purple” roses. She keeps complaining. WHO DOES THAT? Other than that she loves the hotel. And is ready to start her new life.
Tarik & Hazel
I love Tarik. But Hazel is not a good choice for him. How does he have such a huge travel budget? Hazel is from a very poor family in the Phillipines. He wants to rescue her. But we already know that Hazel wants a girlfriend. They have been engaged for two years. Tarik has custody of his seven year old daughter who is Autistic. Tarik is …did he say 47 and Hazel is 27? She also has a son who is 8. And she, is leaving her son in the Philippines. His dad also has primary custody. That’s a bad sign for Hazel.
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Tarik has so many better options in the US. Why is he not with this hot black woman from America? They are just friends. I love her. He tells the hot friend why he and Hazel broke up before. There was pregnancy scare and he thought Hazel had an abortion. If I were Hazel, I’d have a serious problem with this friendship. Then Tarik hooked up with a Thai girl named Minty. Then he got back with Hazel and she wanted all the deets on Minty. She was interested in her. Sweetie, we do not have preconceived notions. But being bisexual doesn’t mean you can’t be monogamous. It seems like Tarik is still talking to Minty. Pretty girl says “It’s game over when Hazel gets here.
Zied & Rebecca
Rebecca has already been done this whole “marry a Muslim guy” thing and it didn’t work out before. She hasn’t learned her lesson with these young Muslim men. Her girlfriend was her boss from the PI company she worked for. She is skeptical.
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Rebecca is super excited about Zied’s arrival. She goes out to buy him a video game console. He asked for it. She has no idea what he wants. This shopping experience is funny. I need this gamers on the show. I need to see more. I don’t live too far from Woodstock. Maybe a day trip is in order? lol. Okay, Rebecca is obsessed with Zied. She has blankets with their photo on them. That’s weird right? She treats him like a child. “Call me when you get to the embassy safely.” Let me know as soon as you know something. Zied says that his passport was taken for a week and he needs to come back later for the result.
Jovi & Yara
Yara’s first reaction to New Orleans was ” I saw fat people!” This was pretty much my favorite New Yorkers response too. LOL. Then he ate and I think sort of got it. It’s hot. We walk slow. We eat well. Or at least a lot. Yara hates the new apartment he is so proud of. Yara was not interested in going out to Bourbon street and Jovi is already pissed. She is tired after her long flight and wants to go to sleep.
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Yara is a PITA. She doesn’t seem impressed by NOLA or Bourbon Street. She hates it and she is scared. I spent a few hours in NOLA once and I was riding cross country ALLLLLLLL the way across I-10 with a guy who had to stop and get gas every time his crappy car ‘s dashboard showed less than half a tank. He had all his worldly possessions in the car. We parked on the street and before we even got into our room, his car was broken into. They took most of his shit. Then we drove over night with the right passenger window with a trash bag flapping. It was God awful. So I get it. I have bad memories of NOLA too. Jovi wants Yara to spend one night at his mom’s. They are already fighting.
Brandon’s mom is awful. And why is she being so rude and pushy to Julia about how she MUST go on birth control medication and NOT badgering her son about condoms. She has no idea if Julia has medical complications or issues that would rule out certain kinds of female birth control. I agree they should use some form of it, but condoms are cheap, don’t require a trip to the doctor and don’t usually cause any sort of side effects. Also, I think its super strange his parents want to pay for Brandon and Julia to stay in a nice hotel room together where they will have sex, but want them to have separate rooms at their house? Their son is near 30 and this is his fiancee he’s planning to marry in 90 Days…what’s the point of enforcing separate rooms? Especially when they’ll just have to move all the shit back into one room again in 3 months or less? Brandon really could have been on I Love a Momma’s Boy.
I feel bad for Rebecca. I don’t see this going well longterm.
I also thought I was watching I Love a Mama’s Boy when watching Brandon with his mother and his girlfriend. And the poor boy doesn’t have “as much fun” using a condom. I bet every woman on the planet has heard that at one time or another. Guys get away with that shit all the time.
I don’t feel sorry for Rebecca. I felt very strongly that her Muslim beau is a scammer from the get go. She just loves the idea that a much younger man is into her…or so she thinks. This one will not end well either IMO.
And Jovi and Yara? YIKES on both ends. Two very very very self centered people. How in the world would any thinking person expect someone who just traveled across the globe for 30 hours to want to go out and party? Can’t you wait one night, Jovi, to continue your partying ways? And while I was taken aback by her comment about seeing fat people, I thought her comment on Bourbon Street was right on! I was disgusted by Bourbon Street. It did stink of alcohol, urine, and vomit. While I might go back to NOLA one day, I will never never ever return to Bourbon Street.
I swear, I would have been so pissed off at Brandon’s mom if I were Julia with that birth control interrogation at dinner. I probably would have put on my sweetest smile and said, “No worries about babies, we only do anal, it’s what your son prefers. Hasn’t he mentioned it?” I’m sure that would have shut her up REAL quick. I’m kind of evil that way.
It’s SO weird that Rebecca has all that stuff with Zied’s picture on it. The throw blanket really did me in.
bwaaaaaaa, that first paragraph cracked me up!!
Oh that would have been PRICELESS!
Ha! I hope Julia shuts her up. Brandon will never defend her
Perfect. Maybe now that she knows his mother is a control freak and rude she will come up with something like that in the future. I’m actually shocked she didn’t just say “I don’t feel comfortable taking about this now”. Brandon is worse than a momma’s boy, he’s also ball-less.
I am in stitches!
As a side note a lot of Eastern Europeans will avoid taking medications of any kind. The reason she said “to drink medicine” is because in russian that phrase roughly translates to take orally/swallow. Brandon’s mother on law reminds me of my MIL. Ignorant, overly involved, and controlling. The last time we traveled to the same place she had our reservations cancelled, and booked us a room next door to theirs. She then tried to keep us too busy to spend time with the people we all had traveled to see. She also had the nerve to ask how soon we would be having sex because my husband seemed stressed. I had just given birth 1 week prior. I hope Brandon grows a spine in the near future, because it will not change if he doesn’t. He really should have shut her down when she had the nerve to call her gynecologist on the way to the airport.
This whole Tarik and Hazel thing is crazy. Being bi does not mean you need to have both make and female partners at the same time. I think Hazel is gay, and that is dangerous in the Philippines, and she wants out so she can come out. I don’t blame her, but Tarek is out of his mind if he thinks this is all going to work for the two of them.
I am trying to think if there is any couple that I like. All of them seem doomed.
Rebecca’s credit card with Zied’s mug on it made me lose what little respect I had for her. It was a shitty picture to begin with and then to have it on your credit card? Eeeesh!
She has it everywhere! If I were him, I would be scared. That level of obsession is unhealthy for all concerned.
This season looks like 90 Day: Just The Green Card Please.
Where so they find these people. Jovi is a self-centered idiot but Yuri isn’t seeming that thrilled so far… the complaining and looks of disdain. Same with Glenn Close from Fatal Attraction.. I mean Natalie. Do they have jet lag or is this just how they are? Not happy with the flowers? Fat people? This is America honey, we like to eat. I thought the flowers looked beautiful. Rebecca seems like she’s either really lonely or obsessed with young muslim men or feels the need to relive her 20’s with that level of intense infatuation. The pictures are everywhere, it creeps me out. Brandon’s mom needs to back the eff off. My god lady, leave your kid alone. Why did they have to come to the airport? Why does he let her push him around? What the hell with the birth control. She’s intrusive, invasive and way worse than Debbie and that’s saying something… Tarek can’t find someone here? I agree with TT on his friend. She’s gorgeous, she likes him and she doesn’t need a threesome.
Brandon is pushed around by his mother because he lives in his parents house and is not financially independent.
No way I’d get involved with a guy whose mother is so involved and overbearing.
TtT, I LIVE for your 90 Day recaps! Please never stop ??
Someone sure has been taking care of Hazel. She was a malnourished twig when we first saw her and now she is a fully developed woman with makeup. I must have dosed off when they showed what was in the big black bag, thanks for the info, a snowboard?? I don’t believe that bug spray man’s parents are anything but paid actors. Thanks for the excellent summary.
Oh I believe they are real. Lots of parents are like that in the south. Not Under My Roof is a constant refrain.
Thanks for recapping this show!
I’m rooting for Julia and Yara! Yara is kinda a B, but that’s why I like her.
I laughed at the Brandon thing…years and years ago I had a baby with my bf that I had been living with for 4 years. We had to stay at his Mom’s house when I came home from hospital due to housing issues. We lived together for 4 years and had a baby and he couldn’t sleep in the same room as me as we were not married! LOL! I told Mommy Dearest we didn’t create your grandson playing Monopoly…she died laughing and honestly her reasoning wasn’t sex…it was if he slept good and the baby didn’t then he would step up the next day and watch the baby while I slept. Her reasoning actually made sense once she told me but at first I was pissed! And since we had a baby who didn’t sleep for the 4 days we were at her house, I got good sleep in the mornings while my bf had the baby. GF should have backed mama up though big time!
Does anyone think Brandon’s mom is a little too excited to be on tv? I thought her outfit to the airport was odd — no age shaming here but was she just wearing tights and a long top? She must really think she’s all that the way she was dancing around at the airport. And her OTT smiling and laughing. And her monopolizing the conversation at the dinner table.
Oh lawd, this is going to be a great season -meaning batshxt cray!
Jovi is not ready for marriage and clearly self centered but then Yara makes me feel bad for him – how does that happen?? I LOVE NOLA! I actually stayed on Bourbon Street one time but further down where it wasn’t as crazy. Threw beads to kids – so cute and fun!
Mike and Natalie – run MIKE!!! Poor Uncle Beau….
Brandon’s mom is really crazy – and clearly she rules the roost! Going to be an interesting showdown!
As always, thanks TT for a great recap!
Thanks for another great recap.I love reading your opinions of these silly people ?
For the last few years Ive reduced my viewing of this show to just watching a couple of episodes each season. But I keep up on all of the drama by religiously reading all your 90 days recaps, which are way more interesting than the actual show!
Perfect. Maybe now that she knows his mother is a control freak and rude she will come up with something like that in the future. I’m actually shocked she didn’t just say “I don’t feel comfortable taking about this now”. Brandon is worse than a momma’s boy, he’s also ball-less.
Was there another couple where the girl was from Russia and upset about the colors of flowers or am I mis-remembering? I googled it and apparently flowers are a very big deal in Russia. I know that gifts are expected in both Russia and Ukraine. And the color is important…. kind of like how flowers were handled for Valentine’s day in high school…. Red for Love, Pink for Like or Friendship. I’m guessing that was why Natalie kept commenting on them negatively. I think she thought he was sending her a message that he doesn’t love her anymore. …. Which I think is probably true, but I don’t think he was saying it with the flowers.
You all may be interested to know, you don’t say The Ukraine anymore, it’s just Ukraine. It’s really hard to get used to if you grew up when it was part of the USSR. Apparently it was called The Ukraine when it was a state in the Soviet Union and to call it The Ukraine denies their independence. They’d also prefer the spelling Kyiv since Kiev is the Russian spelling. I’m told it is pronounced keave, rhyming with heave. Since we have so many 90-day people from that area, I thought you all might find some of that interesting.
Actually the Russian spelling is Киев. My recaps are in English.
LOL – I wasn’t correcting you, TT! Sorry if it came off that way. My son is dating someone from Ukraine, so we discuss this stuff a lot. I was just passing along the stuff he tells us from hanging out with her family. She’s not 90-day, by the way, she grew up in the US, but still has ties to Ukraine and visits sometimes. She has bought him some hilarious T-shirts from there that are written in English, but are completely nonsensical.
Actually I did find that interesting. Thank you