I’ve been awake for all of ten minutes as my quest to get my sleeping schedule straight continues. Also, I don’t feel so good. I think it is the changing of the seasons- stuffy head, whiney attitude kind of crap. So I am getting a late start on this RHOP recap. But I could really use a trip to Portugal, so here goes,
Oh Lord, Karen has either put two and two together based on Gizelle’s instagram outside the jewelry store, or production has told her that Juan and Gizelle went ring shopping or Robyn. And she is bringing it up at the table right in front of God and errybody. Karen has reached the age where she can sort of get away with these things. God help me, I am kind of loving Karen this season. Later Gizelle tries to get Karen to stop bringing it up.
Who Toboggans On An Island?
This worthless POS computer is only partially functional and it is driving me crazy. And speaking of crazy, I would not have taken the scary ride up the mountain or the insane toboggans down the mountain in Madeira. I’ve seen both on other reality shows and all it does is make me want to skip Portugal altogether. There is not enough poncha on the island to get me to do that. It is a beautiful island though. Somehow, production gets them all to do it. And, it is fun to watch them in near death experiences.
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On to the Market. Now THAT is something I would love! And I am loving that we get to see more than hotel rooms on this girls trip. The fruits and vegetables are so beautiful. I wish we had markets like this all over the US in every town like they do overseas. I would not be taking samples of stuff off the same little plastic spoon as everyone else though. I would buy hats and other things I don’t need. Candiace seems to be sucking up to Ashley for some reason.
Gizelle Cannot Hold Water…Or Wine
Oh Lord. Gizelle is about to get messy. She has managed to get a key to Wendy’s room and the girls are going to prank her. I’d feel bad about this and call Gizelle out as a terrible person, but it’s Wendy. I guess I will go sit on the horrible person bench next to Gizelle. I’m okay with that. I still can’t find it in my heart not to like Gizelle. Besides, she’s eskimo sisters with Phaedra and that is punishment enough for anyone. Meanwhile, Wendy with all the degrees has to call her husband to ask him what to wear to dinner. Gizelle also tells Ashley about the surprise engagement from Juan that will never happen. And Karen has already figured it out. It’s only a matter of time.
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Finally, we get all these women to a very nice restaurant where they can embarrass themselves in public. As they do. They had me at bread with three kinds of butter. I could just stop with that. Did they say snapper? I’ll have that. Candiace wants to start having children. Can CPS step in and sterilize people before they have kids? Candiace has mocked children on people’s twitter icons as well as Ashley’s miscarriage. She should never have a child. EV…ER. And I don’t say that lightly. Then Karen talks about the time that she bailed Ray out of his financial mess. And how she didn’t feel appreciated. I’d like to care about this but did you see those dishes come out?
Candiace Tries To Redeem Herself
Yum! I am sure they are saying things, but I am distracted by food porn. And this is all rehashing. Lobster ravioli? So much more interesting. The gist of this conversation to me is that the cast is starting to hold Candiace accountable for her behavior. It seems like a turn in their feelings toward Candiace. And giving room for Monique to return to the group. A sign that Monique probably will not get fired. But rumor is (not sourced by me so I have no idea) that Bravo is going to fire Candiace for wishing death in the meanest possible way on a local blogger who did not like her. As it turns out, the blogger was in very poor health, and Candiace knew it and he recently died. Shameful.
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I love how on the ride home they are on their phones in a beautiful foreign country. I like to phone shame because I pride myself on being the last human on earth without a cell phone. I am starting to break down though. But I am addicted to my laptop. Like totally addicted. If I am awake I am on it. So I get it.
The Initiation of Wendy
Back at the hotel, the plan to freak out Wendy has begun. Gizelle claims she has a wardrobe malfunction and needs Robyn and Ashley to help her out in her room. The rest wait at the bar. (Per orders from production I presume) and these three put snakes and spiders in her bed. Normally, I hate adults doing shit like this. But, Wendy deserves it. Everyone is in on it when Candiace and Karen say they will go to Wendy’s room so she can pump. Eventually, the ladies leave and sit in the hall and watch the show on a producer’s camera.
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Wendy screams her ass off twice, and then laughs. So, it turns out that Wendy does have a sense of humor. I’d be pissed people were in my room. So, Wendy is officially a better person than me. I hate pranks. Especially, between adults. I just lack the gene that thinks that is funny. Also, apparently it is ugly sweater night on that ratchet show?
The Green Eyed Monsters
OMG. I bet Gizelle has never been happier to promote something on the show than this pool in Portugal. I want to be there now! So of course, Robyn comes down to film with her and I want what Robyn is wearing. I don’t even know how to describe it is like ribbed leggings sort of with a matching ribbed off the shoulder sweatshirt in lavender. I need this in my quarantine life. Does Gizelle have no edges? Why does she have some sort of oddball headband thingy worn in totally the wrong place in every scene? It’s very distracting. Same for Robyn and most of them with wearing different colors of nail polish on her fingers. I’m sorry. That’s tacky. AND IT’S MY OPINION!
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These two talk about how Karen’s photos for Robyn’s business that know one has ever heard of are not acceptable and she wants to cut her out. Ah, so they already know Karen is getting the good edit this season and they are pissed. Then they mock Karen for having sex. Okay, I am going to need y’all to tell me where this lavender get up can be purchased. Wendy goes to the bar for a breakfast Pina Colada. Respect girl. I’d have my breakfast drink in St. Lucia at the oceanfront bar. But it was a banana daiquiri or banana someone they made….AND BANANAS ARE A BREAKFAST FOOD! 🙂
Also, The Next Morning…
Karen is getting the best edit ever. Now, Candiace is coming to her for counseling. She even calls Karen, “queen.” And Karen counsels her for her reckless behavior and compliments her for not letting the other women rile her up at dinner the night before. Because they totally tried that, and she manage to control herself like an adult for a change. I forget when these women went to Portugal but What the hell season is it. Some of bundled up and others are in sundresses. I guess it was earlier in the morning when Gizelle and Robyn filmed.
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Ashley joins Robyn and Gizelle in a dress I hate. Sorry, Ash. But she is feeling herself so that is all that matters. LOL then Ashley asks Robyn why she is in a sweater. It’s hot! She says she is about to change. I just noticed the sleeves are weird. The poof out at the wrists. I don’t need that but maybe she has short arms. Ashley tells the green eyed ones that she is giving Monique a character statement about Candiace for her court case. Gizelle is correct. This is Ashley paying back Monique for getting rid of the video footage of Michael grabbing the cameraman’s ass at her party. That’s true. But I could write a character statement of Candiace’s abhorrent behavior online and site multiple CURRENT examples.
This was the best RHOP episode of all time.There I said it.
I am loving Karen this season. I feel she is starting to show up who she really is. The past few seasons she had a lot of things going on: taxes, losing her parents, etc. I truly dislike Giselle. I don’t understand why someone would purposely be mean, hurtful, and cruel. It makes me mad and sad. You would think with her having three beautiful daughters, she would be filled with so much light and kindness. Her own children don’t approve of her relationship with Jamal. It makes me sad how robin criticized Karen’s pictures and commented on her age. It looks like she is going to ax Karen’s pics and not posed them on her hat website. She will one day be Karen’s age and she better hope she’s filled with the wisdom Karen has. I don’t like the age shaming and we all age as each day passes. Wendy wants to fit in so bad with the Giselle and robin, it’s sickening.
Yes, the age shaming was petty and seemed producer driven. Karen was doing her a favor by posing for those hats anyway smh.
With the age shaming, I was thinking that Robyn axed out an entire demographic with the age shaming jokes. From the poses that were shown on the hat modeling episode, Karen’s poses were much better than Wendy’s. How are you a business owner and not catering to a demographic (50 years and older) who loves to shop? Plus Gizelle ain’t that much younger than Karen, so she needs to stop it too.
The age shaming is just ridiculous period. It’s especially ridiculous bc Karen is only like 55 and Gizelle just turned 50. All I can say to the age shamers is keep living. I’m not even 50 yet and I see the beauty that comes with age. But look who we are talking about here…smh
Karen looks great for her age and dresses far better than Robyn and Gizelle. Granted, Karen’s hat picts weren’t so great. Karen has sharp features that just didn’t lend to hat photograph. It wasn’t terrible. The hats aren’t anything special anyway.
Well said!!!
Wendy Williams said, on her show today, that Karen was the one that acted like the model, and showed the hat as the product, as that’s what models do. Also, Karen will be Wendy Williams guest next Thiursday.
Karen is 59. What are you talking about?
She’s actually 57.
Robyn is 41, also not a spring chicken! Getting older beats the heck out of the alternative!
I thought it was interesting how Gizelle wanted to prank Wendy as to welcome her into the group, but she didn’t have a welcoming for Monique when she joined the group. Gizelle immediately didn’t like Monique especially after Monique mentioned those 4 homes.
I been sayng all aione the two dirty eye whences are very much & have been highly jealous of Monique , they want what she has loving husband that’s faithful & truly love his wife & beautiful family unlike those two one going backwards to something old and her girls dont even want they own father to come back home there’s Robin holding on to what she only know , to accept and deal with want you want until nobody else want him then you can win by default , Monique & Ashley stay friends because the other cast members dont understand loyalty amongst friends you two got it and one day the others will finally LEARN ! what’s mostly missing in black women friendshipis is LOYALTY.
Karen is great this season. I read somewhere that they will tape the reunion in person and that Gizelle and Karen are the 2 next to Andy.
I’m trying to figure out to phrase this so I don’t get killed. Women like Monique are the worst. She is rich because of her husband. Period. Yet she acts as if she’s Queen E. She took her husbands money and demands to be treated as if. Granted, no one should act above others. But those who do and hold it over others simply because they marry are parasites.
I don’t really see where Monique is demanding to be treated as Queen B. She’s trying hard for acceptance – maybe because of her own feelings of insecurity so she’s overcompensating. BUT none of these women are self-made aside from Wendy who keeps telling us about her degrees, LOL. Karen and Ashley married old rich men. Candace gets money from her mother but constantly calls people names to elevate her status above them. Robyn is broke bc she lost her rich husband’s money. And Gizelle is semi broke living off of the church’s congregation money. So by your definition and to be fair, they are all parasites (except Wendy).
So Karen and Ashley and the others who married a wealthy man are also parasites? Monique and Chris seem to genuinely like each other…
I hope we do not have to endure Candiace for another season. I can’t stand her smug attitude & bullshit posturing. More Karen more Ashley more Monique. The others are not worth mentioning. Reunion is going to be must see television.
Agree with everything you said.
Add me to your “agreed” list too! I fast forward through Candace only scenes. Love Karen but I could most easily be friends with Monique probably more than any housewife in any franchise.
I liked Karen’s photo in the hat with her blond hair. I didn’t think her photos were bad. I refuse to go to the site now because Robin is being petty about Karen. I loved this episode too because I love seeing the food, shopping, and what they wear. I want Robin’s lavender outfit by the pool too. This is what every Real Housewives show should be about…shopping, food, and arguments without screaming or putting people down.
Lol, your comment made me go check. None of the women’s photos are on the site. Just the model and Robin.
I enjoyed this episode. I am enjoying Karen. I thought the prank with Wendy was HILARIOUS.
The Grand Dame is letting loose! Who tells other women, knowing that it could be shown on TV, that they have a beautiful tan clitoris???!!!
It was unacceptable for Candiace to call a defenseless child a Chuckie doll, but to wish a terminally ill man death was beyond evil. I was unimpressed with Andy last night on WWHL for not holding her accountable for her horrible social media venom.
I hope she gets blasted over it at the reunion. I’d also be interested to see if the the green eyed bandits & Wendy continue to defend her disgusting character. If they do, it will be a bad look.
Candiace is an immature idiot for going there in our current cancel culture. She is well aware of what happened to her fellow Bravo mates for their transgressions. If she befalls the same fate, I won’t be mad. Hopefully that way she’ll learn about human decency.
Wow, I just realized I hate Candiace as much as I hate Kim Zolciak & Tamra Judge!
100% agree with all of this…
do you really think that Bravo would fire Candiace because she wished death on a blogger while they keep Kelly Dodd who made atrociously insensitive comments of the thinning of the herd?
Yes. Both have been disgusting online but I think only some people with aggressive behavior and say things that are downright wrong are punished punished but others who do similar things aren’t. We’ll see
Not to be preachy or teachy, but Portugal is not an island.
Not to be preachy or teachy buy they are on the Madeira Islands…
Great recap, Tamara. First things first, I loved Robyn’s knit outfit. It’s something I want in my closet too. I don’t think she spends that much on her clothes so I might even be able to afford it, lol. If anyone can figure out where to buy this one, please post it. Karen is great this season . . . I hope it stays that way. Candiace is obnoxious and I do hope this is her last season on the show. The expressions on her face and some of her mannerisms remind me of Phaedra so that may be one of the reasons I dislike her so much. Gizelle & Jamal have no chemistry when they’re in scenes together so my guess is that she was just looking for some sort of story line to stay relevant. However, if she insists on knowing everything about everyone else’s private life, she should get all bent out of shape when the women ask about Jamal. I find it hard to believe that the 2 pictures of Karen that Robyn showed Gizelle were the best pictures. If the were, it was the photographer’s fault for not posing her in a more flattering way. The scenery and food last night were amazing. If I traveled I’d definitely want to stay in that hotel. I think I paid more attention to the show last night than I have in a long time. If they could keep that up I might be a little more interested in RHOP than I’ve been recently.
Ooops, I meant to say Gizelle shouldn’t get all bent out of shape when the women ask her about Jamal. I’m at work so I’m sneak-typing this, lol.
I wish Ashley would stop saying she owes Monique bc of the butt grabbing situation – even if that’s the truth. She’s loyal to Monique and doesn’t like Candance, period. She’s writing a character statement about Candance and how her inflammatory behavior invites ass whuppin’s. lol. Ashley has first-hand knowledge of that. And she doesn’t need the green-eyed bandits’ approval. They are only loyal to each other.
I think Candiace and Monique are both arseholes, neither one have portrayed themselves in a good light, although I dislike Candiace more.
That’s how I feel. Why is Kim still on the air? I read somewhere that her viewers are down to about 300,000. That’s not much. I was just wondeering if she was fired before they taped the reunion? Some sites are saying she has already been fired.
Just happened upon this website earlier today. They source outfits of copycats and then you asked!! Robyn’s outfit us from Asos and its only $30!! https://www.bigblondehair.com/robyn-dixons-purple-cable-knit-lounge-set/
So weird. Someone posted this link this morning. And I responded to it. So I was just going to delete this one and I wondered why it was here if it was already in comments. So I went to comments and can’t find it anywhere. I don’t know what happened.
It wasn’t a comment it was an email from me. I didn’t remember what the rules were about outside links so I sent you an email with a link!
First time commenting because I didn’t want you to think you were crazy!
THanks. lol I frequently think I am crazy. 🙂
Loving this series and this episode also…so glad the Potomac ladies are bringing it…always puts a smile on my face.
So correct me if I’m wrong, but I was just thinking this morning that we have seen (or heard about in Karen’s case) at least one parent of every woman on the show, and even some of the husband’s parents, and in many cases have gotten a bit of backstory as well. All except Monique. What’s Monique’s story? Where did she come from? I find that a tad odd.
I wanted to put her anger/aggression into some kind of context but we don’t have much to work with. Her husband seems sooo chill and fair and a pretty damn decent guy. It may just be all this keeping up the appearance of a perfect “non-lazy” mother and wife that just caused her to snap? What do you all think?
I definitely think it’s got something to do with her self worth. She said herself before that she doesn’t come from money then she marries this sportsman and he becomes famous and very wealthy. Even her own mother in law looks down on her and calls her names. She will be seen by many as ‘just married to a rich man’ which is sad as she is clearly an amazing mother. Sadly though society doesn’t appreciate mothers as much as it does wealth. Finally I don’t think Chris does a huge amount with the kids or around the house. A lot of woman feel guilty that they don’t do enough so end up doing too much until one day… BOOM! That’s my thoughts anyway
I love this cast – Candiace and all.