Clearly I picked the wrong day to get up at a semi-reasonable hour. Ten pm recaps are hard. I need this not to be on after RHOC. RHOC is not a good lead in anyway. I’d much rather do my RHOSLC recaps on Wednesday at 8. Also, before we get started, I got a very long post from Reddit or somewhere today about Mary. Mary is the one who married her step grandfather shortly after her grandmother died. According to a former member of one of the temples. According to that source Mary and the grandfather left one temple to start their own. This person said it was like a cult and Mary and her grandfather claim themselves to be God personified. And the congregation gives them all of their money. So this just got a bit more interesting.
Meet The Housewives
What was Mary’s tagline. Some like “I love God but I will (unintelligible) the scripture.” So far I like Jen and her family. They are Muslim. Then we move on to Heather. She has three daughters. She married a very rich man. The divorced five years ago. She seems kind of quirky. I think she is still Mormon. Next, we meet Heather and her husband Seth and their youngest son Brooks who is 21. They are Jewish and from Chicago. They head off for a family hike. Also, they have two other kids in their 20s. It seems like they actually do live Chicago.
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Then we met Lisa and her family. She is Jewish by birth but Mormon by choice. She is married to Jon and they have two sons, Jack (15) and Henry (7). They own lots of Tequila companies. They seem to live on fast food. And everyone gets to go through whatever drive thru they want and eat in the car. Moving on we already have our first housewives wedding! Whitney is marrying her boss who she met at work when both were already married. Actually, this is a vow renewal. The have both been excommunicated from the Mormon church.
Happy Birthday To You
Jen has a male personal assistant named Stuart. They are planning a big birthday party for Meredith’s birthday. Meredith and Lisa look an awfully lot alike to me. Oh it’s not just me, it seems everyone thinks they look alike. Lisa shows up and seems very snobby when talking to the other two. Meanwhile, I think it is Whitney who is meeting up with Mary the alleged cult leader. Mary is a nutcase. Oh, we get to see the cult temple. She’s not Mormon but Pentecostal. And crazy as a bessy bug. Mary is not friends with Jen. I’m bored. Can we get to the party?
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When isn’t talking about herself in the third person, she is stirring the pot. Heather claims she has know Lisa for 20 years since they were in college and they are very close. Lisa says she doesn’t even remember Heather from college other than she was a “good time girl.” So of course Jen just can’t wait to report this news back to Heather.
You Smell Like Hospital
The party “for Meredith” was really for Jen. There are Tongan dancers and topless male waiters. Jen confronts Mary about saying she smelled like hospital while she was taking care of her aunt in the hospital. Mary said she almost died twice getting her sweat glands removed from her body. And she is very sensitive to the smell. Can you even live without your sweat glands? All I can think about is that long note I got about Mary today and how she wears designer clothes to church and mocks the congregation for wearing “dresses from Ross” when they are literally paying for all her designer clothes.
Jen calls her friend over to also confront Mary about saying Jen smelled like hospital. That got heated very quickly. Jen storms off into another room and slams the door and starts screaming, “Bitch don’t bleeping disrespct my bleeping family….”
To Be Continued…. But must we really continue, this episode was already too long.
So…smelling “like hospital”…is that a bad thing?
IDGI
It’s not a good smell…
Eau de Hospital would be a disinfectant smell with notes of hand sanitizer. It’s how basically all of us smell in Covid-times though, so this episode was dated before it aired.
Eau de Hospital also smells like dirty hair. and we are supposed to feel sorry for Mary for getting her sweat glands removed? Why is sweating such a big problem in SLC? It doesnt look hot there.
It was odor glands, not sweat glands. But it’s still weird.
I think she just called them odor glands. They are sweat glands.
or bedpans…
I think she needed to explain that the smell is traumatizing to her, brings back bad memories rather than acting childish about it. It was a stupid storyline. Ugh I see a pattern of dumb pointless storylines coming down the pipe with this show?
I just have to say that from all of the friends I spoke with, we were not disappointed. It did seem very, idk the word but the graphics more up to date, not as produced, and just more like, I don’t know. I liked it, I just hope they don’t become too produced as the season goes on.
I am not looking forward to RHOA though
I thought this episode would never end!? I’m not a Bible thumper but I don’t care for ppl that kind of live in opulence and compare it to perfection! Actually it’s the other way around! These women are far from humble and really luv to show off! Just saying, our Lord was humble and was born in a manger! It’s not a sin to have $ but to flaunt it is another story. We shall see as the episodes go on!
Peace ?
The most random thing is that my fiance and I argued after watching this episode because I grew up with Catholic background and also Baptist. So its a mixture. And being very open minded to other journeys. My partner is Agnostic. He is a whit male and got so upset about the scene of Jen and her husband and converting. He was like, “how do you marry someone and suddenly say convert?!?!” My fiance was pissed. I said, “uhm… if I wanted to be super traditional that would really press on you but we’re Progressive so you are you and me am me. I had to let go of it because idk what happens after so why fight now?
I thought it was surprisingly good. And way more entertaining than OC was. I think this one has potential.
And it’s so nice we won’t have to relive the pandemic in this season.
I need them to wear name tags or something. Several of them look alike. And it feels like there’s a lot of them? How many housewives are on here? Don’t we normally have like 5? Or am I losing my mind in my old age???
There are a couple of them, that when my husband walked into the room and looked at the TV he thought they were men in drag or transgender.
Sorry I didn’t mean to reply to your comment.
Operator error lol
There do seem to be too many and I couldn’t keep them apart (some of them anyway).
I haven’t watched yet, because that is staying up late to me. My head hits the pillow at 8:00 pm because I have to get up at 4:30 am.
I have been waiting so long for this show – but especially your opinion! Living in australia i am not sure yet if i can watch it . But i really want it to be good!
I have not watched this yet but black pumps, white hose and a sea foam dress? She’s joking people’s clothes choices? Another case of other people’s money cannot buy you good taste. What a train wreck of an outfit.
Ha! Read your description and had to scroll back up. Wow! You’re right; that did not look good.
agreed…the 1990s called and said No, Heck No!
I’m trying to get past all of the bad plastic surgery… They need Luann , Sonja and Ramona’s doctors ASAP.
They are entertaining and I will watch. I like seeing the different “fashion”. Someone is giving Dorit a run for the money. Mary and Dorit must have the same stylist
Jane Fonda has the best plastic surgeon. Also Dolly Parton.
It seems like that city needs a decent colorist. Why are they’re all dressed in early 90s Barbie-glam all the time?
These people are very strange, I’ll give them that.
Someone marrying her step-grandfather is a bridge too far for me. That’s a problem.
I like that they have a Kim D. character. Keri?
Oh my god it’s so horrible. And they probably all used the same plastic surgeon because so many of their facial structures look disfigured in the same way. Maybe that’s part of the reason people are having trouble telling some of them apart from each other. I’ve never seen so much bad plastic surgery in any of the housewives shows in so many of them at the same time. It’s so bad it really distracts from the show.
Right now this show is meh for me. I don’t really like anything I’ve seen on the show yet except some of the cars, but then they let their children eat in their rapidly approaching 100 thousand dollar car and I was like oh hell no.
There’s something really off about most of these ladies and I’m not sure what it is yet, but so far it’s off putting.
I didn’t care for all the bragging of designer stuff especially now in a pandemic when people are having $ troubles. They all seem too over the top to me and nothing seemed real. That Mary bugs me beyond what words can say. Not sure I will watch anymore. it might just be background noise while vaccumming.
Mary didn’t have a tagline and wasn’t in the snowflake picture…?
Or no she did. Sorry they do all look alike ?♀️
The Peepaw fucker is a real bitch and I don’t care how much her clothes cost, she looks like shit.
My favorite comment of the entire thread!
“I love God, but I will read you like a scripture.” Uh, that’s a choice.
I think that’s the same idiot who said she wants to make Christmas be…Christmas *facepalm* as if she thinks it’s a coincidence that Christ is in the word Christmas.
Cult leaders are notoriously dumb. Allegedly.
Not sure if it was on this episode or preview for next week’s episode where they showed Mary making fun of Jen’s Aunt for having her legs amputated. Commenting that it was probably the aunt fault for having a bad diet anyway.
disgusting. Another Bravo show I don’t have to waste my time on
What a despicable thing to say for a someone who believes they are the personification of God!
TT, loved all the tea on this woman! Hopefully your source will continue to come through with more information for you!
Lisa was clearly brought on to bait the church. Liquor company, and then when they get in the car, she says she wants Diet Coke, which is like the accepted Mormon coffee. He then says he is getting tattoos, which the Mormon church does not like. This sounds like a weird thing to blurt out, but he’s setting up the storyline. She’s also wearing a one-shoulder, which shows she isn’t wearing the magical underwear, garments. This is all to signal they are “cool” Mormons who don’t follow the rules. Maybe none of this is enough to get discipline exactly, but stay with me.
The term for this is a Jack Mormon, or someone who belongs but doesn’t follow the rules.
There’s a crazy involved process for church discipline, and it would be a good storyline. The high profile examples of this are Sam Young and Jeremy Runnells. Jeremy Runnells recorded it, and it’s amazing.
Maybe they can set this up in a couple years. The church has been known to look the other way for celebrities, example the Osmonds. In recent years, they have toned down the discipline, because it’s bad press. So, they’d really have to piss the church off to force them to act. I would guess this is headed to a conflict about some kind of real, serious Mormon position, like homosexuality. I AM HERE FOR IT.
That was my thinking when they introduced the flamboyant son who went on the hike with his mother and father, handled the supervision of the roses, and rose pedal display for his mother’s birthday, and the mother says she was ecstatic he was there so he could do her make up every day.
That seemed a little in your face and I suspect that’s inevitably heading somewhere.
Except aren’t they Jewish? I thought it was kind of weird that he escorted her to the party – I guess because it was her birthday and didn’t want her to have to be alone? But there was no one under the age of 40 there, and not even that many men (except for the servers!). I don’t mean it was creepy weird, it just seemed a bit odd to me.
I won’t be watching because I made a promise to myself not to start a new housewives franchise and I’ve kept that promise (I don’t watch Dallas or Potomac because of this). But I will read your recaps, Tamara!!
Thanks Laura! I stalked these women on social media and talked to a couple of locals and actually had high expectations for this franchise. I probably should have aimed lower. Most of the people I follow on Twitter liked the show. And there were a few polls on my timeline that were favorable.
I live 4 miles from Lisa? I know exactly where she lives. Still working on finding the others.
I’m really curious what they liked about it, because right now I don’t see it.
This one does seem to have a higher percentage of housewives with “successful” businesses of their own though.
I’m wondering how the rest of Mary’s family felt about her marrying her step-grandfather. I can’t imagine one of my daughter/sister saying they were gonna marry gpa- gross! Also, after the renewal ceremony ….did anyone else notice the bride’s creepy dad watching her on the stripper pole?? That made me cringe too.
my husband had an aunt who, years after her husband died, married her husband’s uncle. So she had the same last name again. However the uncle was not schtupping Grandma…..
Beyond creepy seeing the father cheering on his daughter’s pole dancing skills. Is this a hobby of hers or her livelihood? Odd time to show off your talents at a wedding reception with friends and family!
Was that stripper pole in their house? Who has a stripper pole in their house?
I read through all the comments to see if anyone would mention the dad/daughter/pole thing. Weird…
The whole thing was weird. I had a totally different expectation… There was so much cray I couldn’t process it all.
I broke down and added this show to my DVR tonight, had FOMO for TT’s posts….LOL
You will probably live to resent me for this decision. 🙂
I actually liked it, the Mormon/religious aspect lent something new to the show, however they need to get a decent plastic surgeon, colorist, AND wardrobe stylist to SLC ASAP. Also the Peepaw fucker (I stole that from above) makes me uncomfortable that she has all those deisgner duds but runs a church, I get the feels the money is lining her pockets-a la Joel Osteen.
Brooks is by far the best character so far!
It’s not really a church. It’s a pentecostal cult.So it’s more like Scientology. Her congregation and the pastor both claim to be personifications of God. Allegedly.
They all look similar because they go to the same injector…
My thinking as well they need to travel to the East Coast to get their work done.
I would have said West Coast but they might bump into whomever works on Lisa Rinna’s lips and make matters even worse for this plastic tragedy of a show.
Or better yet just stop deforming themselves in a never ending search for perfection that makes them look less and less naturally human and ever more hideous after each procedure.
One thing I’m confused about is the disagreement between Jen and Mary. There is footage of them being friend six months earlier? Was there six months of filming that was worthless and only started editing and creating what is shown to us six months later?
It all seemed weird to start off with scenes of, underarms Botoxing, wedding/pole dancing reception, a million rose petals for a birthday celebration from an absent husband, big blowout birthday bash hosted by a friend etc etc. it didn’t feel cohesive and felt very staged.
These women seem to be reading from a script and are trying too hard to show how “fabulous “ they are! i.e. Thanks Lisa for listing off all your tequila brands. I’ll make sure never to buy any of them!
The timeframe is confusing. It’s clearly winter, so pre-Covid-ish. That footage would have to be over a year ago in summer. Weird they would start the episodes in winter, when they have been filming six months, but here we are I guess. If I’ve learned anything about reality TV, it’s that the timeline is less important than the storyline.
So I watched it, was it worth the hype, ehhh!! I had no idea the Utes coach wife was so extra. I kinda miss when people used to be somewhat genuine, now its I’m on TV I’m famous! One of those brunettes really is annoying though. Theres something about her voice that cuts me. I’m not sure if I’ll be a regular watcher since I cut away to watch Amazing Race. I dunno, the focus on religion is a bit off putting since my my inlaws are mormon and from there, but I did related to the ‘my family were so and so for Joseph Smith and were pioneers’, that was funny? trust me I’ve heard so much bragging over the years, this stuff is just sadly funny to me now. And one of those chicks really lives in Chicago, does this show on the side, come on Bravo, either fulltime or not at all!!
My understanding is that almost none of them live in Salt Lake City and the ones that do live in Utah live in… a city about…. I forget… like 45 minutes to an hour away. I think Mary lives in Salt Lake because that is where the cult is located.
TT … can we talk about the WWHL episode after the premiere? What the hell was Jen’s outfit? That hat and matching ensemble were way too much for me! But the hostility between Jen and Mary was enough to keep me watching! In the episode, I loved seeing Mary insisting on confronting Jen’s friend at then party and then acting like a moron when she was called out for what she said. I wish Andy got deeper with that. One more thing … your replies to comments above made me giggle put loud! I love your wit and comebacks … especially the well placed “allegedly”. I’ve been so depressed and despondent with life, quarantine and the election. Your recaps and everyone’s comments make me feel less alone. Thank you all. ♥️
Believe me, I just as glad to see you guys here everyday. It helps to know we are are struggling and helping each other at the same time.
So far, I don’t like any of these women, most of whom will remain nameless because I can’t tell them apart. The two blonds seem OK, but at the top of my list of people to dislike are Jen & Mary. I’ll watch a few more times to see if I can change my mind.
I dislike Mary so much that I am hoping that Jen can settle her ass down and focus her loud mouth directly on her. Jen did a walk off at her own party on episode one! That was just a win for Mary Martha!
I’ve disliked housewives before but Mary is the worst of the worst. I wish Jen would focus all of her rudeness on Mary but she’s still an annoyance.
Mary, the label dropper, (what Tamra used to call Jim Bellino) gets all her money from the parishoners? AKA Jamal and Gizelle Bryant? The scene of her being the PASTOR in church, didn’t look like her parishoners were wearing all those designer clothes. So I guess when they tithe, she gets a new Chanel Bag? Or buy’s a restaurant?
You are a very good guesser, the cult followers are apparently under the belief Mary Martha and Peepaw are literally “God personified.”
Apparently, Jen is NOT going to calm down as filming goes on…
“I’m just reacting how I normally would,” 46-year-old Shah told Page Six. “I wasn’t talking to people behind the scenes when we were filming, so when something would happen, it literally was as if it was just happening … Yeah, I’m going to get pissed and throw glass. Like, that’s normally how I would react. Either I’m throwing my cellphone or a glass, one of them, whatever is in the closest range to me at that time!”
I liked the two Muslim sons and their father.
It went downhill from there.
I, too, can’t tell several of them apart due to the plastic surgery.
Too long, too confusing as to who is who.
I hope it gets better.
On the subject of hospital smells, if you have a good sense of smell they really do assault your sense of smell. And that’s in addition to all of the various smells visitors bring with them into hospitals.
I don’t like Mary on this show, but as a person who has a really strong sense of smell I get from where she was coming. It’s hell having to sit in a confined space having to tolerate the smells coming off the space, and the people and that includes their favorite though all too frequently frankly disgusting fragrances. For example guys who were the AXE line of products they walk around leaving a disgusting smell, and a chemical presence that I can taste on my tongue. That shit should be outlawed.
I’ll add two more scents to the list that I hate smelling at hospitals, necrotic, and bacterial infection smells.
Nothing like the smell of C. Diff!
Well, this is the first time I have to say watching a HW show that I immediately disliked all of these women. First, I felt like I was in Madame Tousseau’s House of Wax. I was frightened. Secondly they are already the most pretentious and phony women I have ever seen. UGH. Don’t think this will be on my list to watch. Will give it another go but it doesn’t look hopeful.
I just can’t…
What a train wreck. I loved it!