You Guys YES YOU! Both of you who are sticking with me to the bitter end of this shit season! My power was off today and I missed the holy hell out of you! IT WAS HORRIBLE. Thanks for reading my Big Brother All Stars recaps. I’m supposed to recap RHOOC tonight but I am just going to do a Big Brother recap and Amazing Race and call it a night. I’ll tackle RHOOC tomorrow when and if I wake up. I hope you are all hanging in there and shout out to Cheryl B. who needs some extra love.
The cheese has been sliding off my sandwich a little bit this week. But I am praying for all of you. I think God is probably wondering why I am some sort of prayer warrior these days. One of my BFFs recently asked me, “You pray?” lol Yes, backrow Baptist do indeed pray. Okay enough of that let’s get to the shitshow.
Blue, Blue, Blue Christmas
Oh I am excited about the luxury comp. I don’t know much about it. I haven’t been paying attention really. I’m more into Amazing Race at this point. I am so pissed at Cody and Nicole for being shocked that Christmas is upset. She is not required to play your game! I don’t even like Christmas but I hate you guys more at this point. This season was handed to you on a silver platter! And then there was a luxury comp. Is this Grodner’s parting gift for Christmas? I literally forgot who won already. It’s SO TOTALLY RIGGED though. Each player drafts four BB Comics from the veto and they face off in a battle. Apparently, production decides who wins. Naturally.
Nicole picks Janelle? Wow. She is obsessed. This is pretty fun but still very scripted. In round one the good Nicole takes out Bayleigh. YES! Then Christmas takes out Ian leaving Cody with only two superheroes left. This might be the stupidest thing I have ever watched but I need stupid right now. Oh gee it is down to Nicole and Cody. How did that happen?#Production. Nicole won the 10K. Christmas is pissed. Everyone is pissed. I hate Nicole. I hate all of these people. Christmas is pissed she didn’t pick Memphis.
Let’s All Cry Some More
Then Christmas waxed Enzo and Cody’s eyebrows. It was hilarious. Enzo took it like a man but Cody screamed like a little girl. Christmas loved it. Cody is already nervous about veto. I love Enzo. I hate that he is going out final three. If the script goes as planned. I HATE RATCOLE SO MUCH! During the break I went to pee for the fifty billionth time today. And I thought I would jump on the scales. Apparently my scales are battery operated. I wonder what kind of battery they need. That is a project for another day. Just like trying to block all of these political phone calls! MAKE THEM STOP!
I love that a throw back to calling the houseguests hamsters is theme of this veto. If you are not an old schooler… before there were fish and I thin something else in between there were hamsters in the house. So we called the houseguests, hamsters. I just realized they don’t even have fish this season. Probably because they would have had to quarantine the fish keeper. Holy shit sirens are going off everywhere in my neighborhood. This whole day has felt like a Friday night. Shit is going down in the ghetto.
It’s Hamster Time!
It’s the days challenge that they have all been studying for since they entered the house. They are given an event and have to run in an hamster wheel to increase the number of days. This may be my favorite challenge ever. Despite the fact that it is geared for a Cody win. I love a good hamster reference. Just like the season I need this to come to a merciful end. I just want to get to The Amazing Race at this point.
Oh look. Cody won. How shocking! I hate all of these people and am pissed I am late to Amazing Race. Nicole is such a whiner. Also their t-shirts look like a purple turd and nothing like a hamster. Cody doesn’t use the veto. Cody acts like he has done something amazing. And pretends like he hasn’t read the script. Cody is the winner of Big Brother due to his pregame alliances. Thanks for reading my Big Brother All Stars recap!