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You are here: Home / RHONY / RHONY Recap” Hitting All The Wrong Cenotes

RHONY Recap” Hitting All The Wrong Cenotes

August 14, 2020 by tamaratattles 34 Comments

Lord I feel like shit. I’m totally exhausted. Why am I sofa king tired from sitting on the couch? I feel like I have run three marathons back to back and my ONE JOB  is to recap this hour long TV show. I feel like I might just fall over. WTF IS WRONG WITH ME? Anyway, onward and upward? These bitches are just boring. BORING. I’m just bored by all of this.

Grumble, grumble. THIS IS ME RIGHT NOW. I think Luann may still be drunk. Luann and Dorinda are the only ones working out. I can’t with Ramona pretending like she has a monetary deal outside of Bravo.. Sorry. How the hell is Dorinda always fresh as a fucking daisy every morning?

I’m bored. But I so get that having your own business is 24/7. Leah actually has a business. I am  not sure what Sonja is pretending to do these days. No time off. I get it. I don’t even know what they are arguing about at this point. My goodness Luann has the perfect body.  Sonja storms off. And now they are arguing about updating social media. Leave Leah alone. This is all the footage they have? I get being offline at the table but still. Are we really going to talk about menopause? I just woke up at three am and all the screeching is a lot. And by just woke up, what I mean is I am barely awake typing this in my sleep. I’m just so tired all the time. I’m starting to wonder if I have THE COVID.

RHONY RecapThose Are Not Gay Men Shorts

Leah got up early to work. She took out her laptop and tried to get a few things done at the outdooer breakfast table alone. Then Dorinda comes bossing everyone around. I don’t even own a cell phone so I get the whole, no cell phones at breakfast rule, But Leah has a business. I just woke up to pee at three am and am trying to knock out a recap. It’s what you do. Why is Dorinda everyone’s overbearing mother? Everyone is irritated with Dorinda. Ramona wonders if it is menopause?

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Luann and Leah pick up a couple of Canookian guys. Why do I feel a whole be cool, don’t be all uncool thing happening here? They drag the guys back to the house. And Ramona has the Ramona eyes. Later, Dorinda has diarrhea and can’t go out with the ladies. Who is going to boss the women around and scream at them for not acting the way she wants? The two Canadians do make it to the night out on the town though. Oh Lord. Here come the shots! These two Canookians are having the time of their lives. It looks like Leah might have sex at the table with one of the guys.

Off For a Swim

The next morning, Dorinda is rebounding after a home visit from a doctor named Ceasar Cassanova. Meanwhile, Leah brought one of  the Canookians home. I love the cutaway shots to the Mexican private chef who is pretending he isn’t listening to these ladies. And they are off to swim in a cenote. But first, a visit with a shaman. Oh my, they have to rappelling into the water? My rappelling days have long since pasts. No thank you. Luann is a pro though and goes all the way down. How the heck are they going to get back up? Leah, Dorinda and Lu rappel down and go for a swim. As it turns out, apparently you could just walk down there. Oh God no. You lost me at the bats. I’m out. I don’t even want to see bats on TV. This does not look fun at all.

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It lunch the topic turns to vaginal cleansing or something. Leah says she sees a witch doctor of some sort who gave her a um, a vaginal egg for her vagina. I am a  bit tipsy at four am so this is actually making sense to me. It occurs to me that this is kind of a good episode and no one is batshit crazy drunk. And as soon as I typed that, Dorinda got a call from her daughter at the table and everyone has an issue with her hypocrisy. But really, it is Ramona who is the pain in the ass. As usual. Just when we almost had a nice episode. I love that Dorinda is mocking Ramona for her over the top dramatics. Ramona may be clinically insane. I’m just saying. But we finally did have a mostly fun episode.

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About tamaratattles

Come for the tea. Stay for the shade. Not for the easily offended. You're a special snowflake just like everyone else.

Comments

  1. Stubbyg says

    August 14, 2020 at 5:02 am

    This was my favorite episode this year because of the great one liners. What I appreciate about the NY Housewives is their ability to have a great time. They also seem to genuinely care about each other, for the most part. After watching the constant bickering and meanness from the BH wives, NY is refreshing. Don’t get me wrong, Dorinda and Ramona are batshit crazy (?), but they seem to be supportive of each other.

    I feel your insomnia riddled nights. I haven’t had a decent sleep in two months. The second anniversary of my mom’s death is coming up and my anxiety and depression meds no longer work. Even my medical MJ isn’t working and I just can’t seem to see anything but darkness. My psychiatrist is sending me to therapy, increased by dosage of head meds and prescribed Valium to try to relieve my ptsd symptoms. So, I’m praying. Take care, TT, your recaps and stories give all of us joy.

    Reply
    • tamaratattles says

      August 14, 2020 at 6:11 am

      Hey sweet girl. We are all experiencing long and dark nights. But we have each other. We are a nice (lol mostly) little family here. And we all need a family in the dark of night. xooxoxoxoxo

      Reply
      • Stubbsg says

        August 14, 2020 at 10:18 pm

        Thank you T!

        Reply
    • Joey says

      August 14, 2020 at 7:02 am

      Stubbyg, I am so sad to read your comment. I understand your pain. It just sucks! I wish I had words to make you feel better. Hang in there, we are here for you. I too am in therapy and I believe this site has helped me a lot. I can say what I feel and want to say to be heard and others support me.

      Reply
    • tamaratattles says

      August 14, 2020 at 7:08 am

      I have no idea when my parents died. I don’t remember anything about the funerals. I don’t choose to dwell on it I literally have no memory of any of it. I wish you would all do the same it’s too painful. and I am grateful for my ability to no remember anything at all.

      Reply
      • marc says

        August 18, 2020 at 3:58 pm

        Oh how I admire that stance. Good decision I replay the funeral in my mind over & over. I remember my nephews & nieces sobbing & I totally lost it. # ugly cry # loud cry # tear tsunami

        Reply
    • Jaded says

      August 14, 2020 at 10:07 am

      The second anniversary of a death was hardest for me. The first year is like being numb or moving through quick sand. I’ll be sending positive thoughts your way. Hang in there. Here’s to hoping you feel more like yourself soon.

      Reply
      • Bubbles says

        August 15, 2020 at 8:10 am

        It is no easier at the 16th anniversary:(. Those of us who were lucky enough to have good Moms (even those of us who spent alot of years not realizing it) will never have a day in their lifes where our Mom’s are not sorely missed even in the best of times, which these certainly are not.

        Reply
    • Nanette says

      August 14, 2020 at 1:02 pm

      I hope you get some good sleep and emotional peace. No matter how old you are when your mother dies, it’s the worst. I hope the therapy helps. If CBD oil is legal where you live, it’s worth looking into. I resisted for so long because I was SO TIRED of trying everything and it not working. It seemed too good to be true. But for PTSD and anxiety, it beats everything, except heroin, which is no longer an option. ?? ♥️ ??

      Reply
    • Pam says

      August 14, 2020 at 3:07 pm

      Hello there. I’m so very sorry you’re having a tough time. Have you heard of TMS THERAPY? It’s supposed to help with depression. I’ve looked into it for a family member and thought and I’d pass it on after reading your comment. Maybe it can help you. Hope you’re feeling better soon.

      Reply
      • Stubbyg says

        August 14, 2020 at 10:22 pm

        Thank you ladies! I have tried the TMS Therapy, etc. It was hard to relax enough…I’m trying to help my dad too, so everything just doubles. It helps to have support from you all, all your comments made me feel like I have friends. I appreciate you all, many hugs!

        Reply
    • JustJenn says

      August 15, 2020 at 12:13 am

      I’m sorry for your loss. I can imagine losing your mom is probably one of the most difficult things to happen in life. Add that to these crazy, isolated COVID times and its too much. I hope you can find relief and sleep soon ❤️❤️

      Reply
  2. Rabicate says

    August 14, 2020 at 6:02 am

    LuAnne is becoming a favorite of mine and I would never have guessed that. She handled Dorinda when she had the thou shalt never have electronics at the table crackdown. Livened up the dinner by nicely inviting the Canadians and going for it at the cave/underground lake adventure. So glad her alter ego, the Countess, stayed home in New York. But Leah, my young highly watchable friend what is that duality with the sucky face chair dance sexual frenzy in public only to kick the man out later, supposedly sans actual sex? Is this a generational thing or an alcohol turned more sober decision.

    And TT, you work so hard. I’d be exhausted if I had your writing schedule. Hope that’s what it is.

    Reply
    • tamaratattles says

      August 14, 2020 at 6:13 am

      I mean what is not to love about our Canookian friends to the north? We all have such high expectations of them to be the good and decent people we wish we were.:)

      Reply
  3. Wanda GREENE says

    August 14, 2020 at 8:52 am

    Leah’s goal is to get rid of Ramona and bring in that weird sister of hers. Bravo should bring in a younger NY cast on another show. Leah’s nearly forty acting just as messy as her OLDER castmates. She makes sure to throw a dig about age every chance she gets. She’s as desperate as the others to make that BRAVO money. So let her. I won’t watch anyway. But I can’t stand how naive (younger) women are about growing older and far to often hateful!

    Reply
  4. JustJenn says

    August 14, 2020 at 9:06 am

    Luann is quickly becoming my favorite this season and seems like she would be the most fun of the group to hang out with. Ramona and Dorinda are both miserable. Sonja’s drinking is out of control, but she seemed a lot better on WWHL last night. I’m still trying to figure Leah out, but I do appreciate is that she’s straightforward.

    Reply
  5. Devin says

    August 14, 2020 at 9:50 am

    All of you guys are correct. Luann is hot. Just sayin’.

    Reply
  6. Ktina says

    August 14, 2020 at 9:56 am

    I loved this episode! Ny is the best franchise hands down. They’re actually friends and it shows. Those BH ladies only see each other when filming and don’t like each other hence the manufactured drama.

    Reply
  7. MelG says

    August 14, 2020 at 10:34 am

    I’m definitely jealous of how hot Lu is looking. I guess working out pays off…I wouldn’t know.
    Dorinda was being a bossy bitch. I get the phone at the table whole bad manners thing, but Leah initially sat at the outdoor table to get some shit done before the others were out there. I did like later on when Leah upset Ramona because she wouldn’t join in with the others scolding Dorinda. What a refreshing point of view…. you guys were already giving her hell why should Leah join in when Dorinda’s always had her back? That’s new for the housewives’ shows. Every other franchise seems to operate based on a unwritten rule that if 1 jumps on someone the whole damn group must…anger orgies.
    I loved when Leah said it’s better to have a crystal up her vagina than a stick up her ass. LMAO

    Reply
    • Ktina says

      August 14, 2020 at 12:26 pm

      Because Leah is a true New Yorker! That’s what we do. Stand up for our friends.

      Reply
  8. Kris says

    August 14, 2020 at 10:47 am

    Can I say Luann is so good looking! Amazing. But I have to say I wanted my money seeing her perform. I mean I was very open minded and willing for almost anything but it was terrible! My hubby and I left early.

    Reply
    • Hummingbird says

      August 14, 2020 at 1:02 pm

      Yes, LuAnn looks amazing physically and she looks relaxed and HAPPY. Maybe we are seeing a happy LuAnn for the first time. Over the years she has been dealing with a lot of shit. A failing marriage, a divorce, teenagers, trying to figure out a new life, a devastating second marriage and divorce, an arrest played out in public, Bethany haranguing her at every turn and throwing her failures back in her face. She seems able to deal with Dorinda’s nastiness better than Bethany’s and just looks plain happy to me.

      Reply
      • Kris says

        August 14, 2020 at 4:51 pm

        Hummmingbird, oh my goodness I hated Bethany for how vile she was to Luanne, totally mean.

        Reply
      • Maggie says

        August 15, 2020 at 1:46 pm

        So true!

        Reply
    • Nanette says

      August 14, 2020 at 1:09 pm

      Hence, the “and Friends” part of her CABARET. She cannot carry a show — or a tune — on her own. From what I have read from us “regular folk” about her CABARET over the years, it seems that, unless you are a Lu Stan, the enjoyment rises and falls based on who the “ friends” are at each shOW.

      I am enjoying Lu this season. As long as The CounTESS and the CABARET “star” stay locked in that suitcase.

      Reply
      • Kris says

        August 14, 2020 at 4:50 pm

        Lol good to know Nanette. Her friends were off. Truth be told I think she and her whole cast were absolutely high and/or wanted when I saw them.

        Reply
  9. DalaiMama says

    August 14, 2020 at 4:38 pm

    Hey fabulous people. Holy hell I love this show. It’s just about the only thing that can reach its tequila soaked fist through my stage 3 cancerous, chemo-ridden body into my heart and make me feel happy during this fecal nugget of a year. The only caveat is that I’m legitimately afraid of Dorinda now. Her bile and ire are so potent I shrivel up when she starts in on somebody, even though I’m safely alone in TV-audience-land. Also, can you believe it girls, I just spent three days in the hospital and the head nurse came in with her assistant to say hi and asked what I was watching. “Real Housewives of Potomac” says I. The nurse starts kvelling and plotzing over RH, we do a brief rundown of our favorites, then she turns to go. As she’s leaving, I hear her say to her assistant “See, me and her, we got a CORE friendship now.”

    Reply
  10. Prycer says

    August 14, 2020 at 5:26 pm

    Ramona and Dorinda are both the “do what I say not what I do” type of people. I had a friend like Ramona, who would hold me to a different standard than to herself and others. It was very draining and very toxic to be around her, nothing I said or did was right. I had to just walk away from the friendship it wasn’t worth it. As for Dorinda’s behavior about the call, was rude and not cool. Very rude that Leah and Sonja couldn’t work outside but yet Dorinda and take a call at the table. Hypocritical much.

    Reply
  11. BeetsWhy says

    August 15, 2020 at 12:26 am

    I so hate that these women are 10+ years older than me and look waaayyy better in a bathing suit! Gotta say it depresses me most that Ramona isn’t afraid of going under the knife and still has the big (spanxed) belly. I have the same thing, genetic, I was hoping there was a surgery to make it go away ? Clearly not or she’d have had it. ?

    Oh, and Dorinda drank too much, she DEFINITELY did not have Montezuma’s revenge and get over it in a few hours. Been there (México), done that (for six months).

    Reply
  12. Audrey says

    August 15, 2020 at 7:15 am

    This episode was the best of any HW franchise in a looong time. Fabulous location, laughter at dinner, no mean girl drama. I loved it!

    Reply
  13. Chris McTarsney says

    August 15, 2020 at 10:00 am

    I don’t want to get all up in your business but have you had your thyroid checked. A malfunctioning thyroid mimics depression and major fatigue.

    I enjoy your recaps.It is my go-to for all things housewives. Even if we do not agree on Nene. (yup, I said it).

    Reply
  14. Not Andy Cohen says

    August 15, 2020 at 1:21 pm

    Dorinda knows how to troll these bitches lol. Especially Ramona. The last 5-8 minutes of that episode had me dying of laughter on how sassy Dorinda handled and trolled Ramona further irritating her. Funny that once Ramona couldn’t get at Dorinda she then turns to Leah to try to turn this on her hahaha. Overall, NYC always delivers with the arguments and drama. They stick to just being petty and shady. They don’t resort to talking about rape allegations (ATL), prison sentencing (NJ), lesbian love affairs/drama set ups (BH), fake cancer (OC), etc. I’d say NYC with maybe a little but it Potomac are the two crities that really stick to petty drama and fun times. Potomac last season got a bit much/dark with Candice/Ashley And only gonna get worse but overall, NYC is lighthearted drama that can be enjoyed.

    Reply
  15. JenFl says

    August 16, 2020 at 12:54 pm

    Long live NY!!!! Still good and, while a bit camera hungry, Leah is honest and good hearted.

    Reply
  16. marc says

    August 18, 2020 at 4:03 pm

    I loved the shaman with the birds reacting wildly. Pretty good episode.

    Reply

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