Now that I’ve gotten caught up on Rome, it’s time to head back to Cancun for the RHONY recap. When we left off, Sonja was wasted as usual, and Ramona was talking about Leah’s vagina, That seems to be Ramona’s favorite subject. Dorinda finally gets drunk Sonja into bed. Then she goes to try to check on Ramona and Ramona is rude to Dorinda. Ramona tells Dorinda that she needs to go to AA and take Sonja with her. True. But not something a friend says on vacation. Dorinda is not even drinking. I’m not even sure I watched the last episode.
I’m bored. Really bored. Can they please just all go to bed? Dorinda is now throwing Luann’s arrest in her face. Again. Finally, we all go to bed. Dorinda once again wakes up fresh as a daisy. Does it snow in Mexico? Meanwhile, Sonja is trying to get Ramona to believe that the reason she was so fucked up was because she took a “dehydrating water pill.” Somewhere around here is a blind item about the pills Sonja takes every morning. And the source was one of her interns. Maybe this one? Anyway, this whole game of who has the worst drinking problem is getting old.
Luann’s Camel Riding Redemption
Luann is going to once again try to ride a camel. That’s always good for a laugh. Since no one is drunk yet, Ramona is googling anger management issues. She says Dorinda has an anger problem. Pot? Meet kettle. Ramona’s next target is Leah. She lectures her like a child. AGAIN. Ramona actually apologizes. Sort of.
Every time I see a camel ride I have memories of childhood trauma. Let’s just say I ruined the camel ride for my parents. Ooopsy. That said, camels are awful creatures. These camels are HUGE. But they have saddles with “handlebars” that was not my experience. Ramona doesn’t get on a camel at all. Sonja demands to get off immediately. Leah literally jumps off the camel. Only Luann and Dorinda enjoy the camel ride to the end.
Sonja Gets A Birthday Party
As a reward for surviving the camels they have a stunning cabana full of flowers. The food looking incredible. I want to try it all! Luann tries to clear the air with Dorinda. Dorinda is too defensive about her drinking to make any forward progress. Eventually, they agree not to bring up each others drinking. Then Luann joins a men’s volleyball game promising that she is a great player. She’s awful.
Next, everyone is off for a surprise birthday dinner for Sonja. They are highly overdressed for a cantina. Sonja loves her party. The extremely short waiter comes out with a full bottle of tequila on is head. What could possibly go wrong? Then the guy comes out with four huge fishbowls of margaritas balanced on top of each other, on his head! This is the best birthday ever! This is the best place they have ever eaten! Luann is scoping out the men. Everyone is getting along. So far. Even Ramona and Leah.
Stop Talking About Vaginas!
Dorinda and Luann go to the bathroom to change into costumes. Luann comes out and sings Happy Birthday in a giant sombrero. Cabaret style of course. Then Dorinda comes out with a cake. For reasons that are unclear, she is wearing golden turban and fake giant boobs. Sonja motorboats the fake boobs. Because, Sonja. Things were going great until Leah and Ramona argue about their vaginas. Ramona is always the one bringing it up and then screaming about people talking about it.
Next week looks like fine. In true Luann fashion, she picks up a guy or two and Leah makes out with one of them. I hope the next morning everyone was cool. And not all UNCOOL. 🙂 See you next week.