I just realized I have four hours of MAFS to recap. So, first, let’s try to knock out the MAFS recap for New Orleans. It’s time to get out couples married. Oh apparently, we already did that. It appears that I missed an episode of this show. My DVR is on it’s last leg. I feel like I just replaced my DVR. Anyway, at least I didn’t miss Bennett and Amelia’s wedding. They are my favorite couple.
Bennett & Amelia
It’s kind of crazy that in the smaller cities, we haven’t had this happen before. But Bennett and Amelia have met before! The met at a party once. Why are Amelia’s friends wearing some sort of fringe lamp shade thingys on their heads? They are all wearing brightly colored fringe veils. It’s quirky. And Amelia’s entire wedding ensemble is insane! I don’t know how to put the ceremony into words. There is just so much going on. There is a kid in the audience with a drawn on mustache. What is happening here? They seem perfect for each other. The are so cute together! This couple just makes me happy.
Amelia’s brother makes a toast. Half of her family has fake mustaches drawn on. Her brother is wearing a Mardi Gras hat. This is the most eccentric wedding in MAFS history. Bennett goes to meet the bridesmaids in their fringey veils. Perhaps we will get some sort of explanation. The women announce that Amelia has armpit hair. Bennett’s groomsmen love Amelia. There is some sort of “family tradition” where Bennett has to catch an egg in his mouth that his bride swings at him from a stick! And he catches it! And eats the raw egg!
Christina & Henry
These two are the last couple to tie the knot. They are cute. Henry has a lot of nerves, but Christina does not. At least not until the moment comes. While the bride’s family is very excited by how handsome Henry is, she is getting nervous and cranky. Henry’s response to seeing his bride for the first time was,”She’s tall.” That’s not really a rave review. He’s on the shorter side. This is one of the most awkward marriages I’ve seen. They seem very compatible on paper. They are very awkward one on one. So awkward. She can’t even remember his name.
Henry’s dad gives a speech that basically just embarrasses Henry in front of Christina. Henry has a lot of attractive female friends. They are sort of rude. And. they are very intrusive. They are going to be a problem to this marriage.
Karen & Miles
These two got married on the episode that I missed. She was threatening to be a runaway bride after she somehow became aware of her future husband’s name. She stalked him on the Internet and was not interested. I hate Karen. Miles is a great guy. He is so excited about this. I just know she is going to break his heart. Karen’s mom makes it clear to Miles she’s not all in on this entire situation. She also tells him not to pressure her. Miles parents are wonderful. But they tell Karen that Miles is messy when it comes to the house.
Olivia & Brett
I honestly don’t remember much about these two. They seem to like each other. We are not really seeing a lot about this couple yet. That could be a good thing, or a bad thing. Brett’s friends tell Olivia that Brett’s go to response if often sarcasm. His friends are optimistic about the marriage. Brett’s sarcasm comes out when talking to Olivia’s friends. They don’t seem to be amused by him. Oh I remember now, Brett is the asshole.
Amani & Woody
Woody seems really into his bride. Amani has a father and a stepfather. They both get along and want Woody to know he will have two dads to deal with if he hurts their daughter, That said, they both have a good feeling about Woody. Aw, Woody is not on good terms with his father and he is grateful that now he has two dads he can call for advice. Both of Amani’s dads are very open to that and seem like great people. These three guys are great together. Amani meets Woody’s groomsmen. They tell her that Woody is super clean and obsessed about his image.
In the end, all of these couples seem like good matches. They all seem happy and there were no major issues. And off they all go to their hotel rooms. Christina seems to be the least attractive to her spouse. Which is odd because he is hot. Karen gets Miles to give her a foot massage on her wedding night. Amelia is so much more attractive in her PJs with no make up than she was at the wedding. Everyone is off to a great start! But then there is Brett… Le sigh.