You know who is ready for a 90 Day Fiance Happily Ever After Recap? This girl. I’m feeling really good tonight for a change. I got a bunch of sleep last night and have even made a teeny tiny bit of progress digging out of this disaster zone of a house. My cable and Internet went out last night and I ran out of excuses not to make better choices. So I am all ready to go on this recap. I’m a bit worried I don’t have the right photos, but I could not completely stay off the laptop for the whole three hours so I did some hard drive clean up and found a bunch of screen shots for this show that I resized, so it’s totally like the universe is finally smiling on me! So let’s do this. I’m just going to take my time and enjoy the show. Again, I should have listened to you guys about 90 Day shows months and months ago!
I have to say that the quick visual recap of the last episode that show’s Asuelu saying that Kalani was only 40% excited and 70% not excited is still hilarious. I do not understand why Colt and Larissa keep getting picked up for shows. We hate them. It’s not a love to hate. It’s a hate hate.
Karine & Paul
I am pretty full of cheese grits, Serrano Ham and an entire Cherokee purple tomato, but I would love that fried whole fish that old lady is making on the sidewalk in Brazil and one of those watermelons. Paul and Karine are on the way to the airport to discover the joys of International travel with a baby. Karine is a hard 23, I thought she was much older. Now I get her more. But she’s awfully bitter to be 23. Brazil is really suffering with the Covid 19. I hope this little family is still in the US and all of the family back in Brazil is safe. I love her dad told her not to argue with Paul so much. But, fat chance. And her poor mom is terrified about Paul being in charge of her daughter and grandbaby. It’s a very sad goodbye.
Paul beleaguered mother picked them up at the airport. Karine already has culture shock. After much struggling with the luggage, mommy takes them to a hotel she is paying for. But only for a few nights. Corrine takes the crying baby out of the car seat for two seconds and Paul loses his mind. He decides to respond by jumping out of the car and playing in traffic. They eventually make it to the hotel and Paul is still being annoying. Karine enjoying the view from her hotel room is heartwarming. She does wish she was staying with Paul’s mother. But Karine has doubts about Paul getting a job. Just like the rest of us. Next week, reality sets in for Karine.
Larissa & Colt & Jess
Blech. Colt has learned nothing. The first girl he dates after the bloody breakup with Larissa is another Brazilian looking for a green card. Stupid is as stupid does. But neither of them complain about the sex. Actually, quite the contrary. Also, Jess lives in Chicago. Is he planning to move her in with his mother too? And after one weekend they are already in love and planning their future. Okay what am I looking at her. Colt is spastically jumping up and down. Does he think he is dancing? Because there is no way Jess and Larissa can make me believe he is good in bed. Jess has already shared she like to dominate in the bedroom. Let us never speak of this again. And they are going to Brazil together?
Larissa is on the prowl for a sugar daddy. Candidate number one is Matt. He brings her a gift on the first date. He seems like a douche, so he is perfect for her. She tells him about her multiple kids and multiple arrests. Her answer to his question, “What qualities do you look for in a man?” was. “Citizenship.” Oh BTW, Larissa went off on TLC after last week’s episode where she only had four minutes of airtime. And that’s the end of that date. Larissa has struck out. Later, we see her spending money on a cosmetic procedure instead of sending money to her kids. Well not really, but everyone doesn’t know that she doesn’t have to pay for this promotional spot. Also she is jealous Colt is seeing a Brazilian girl. So next week she plans to warn Jess about Colt. And Colt tells his mommy about Jess.
Elizabeth & Andrei
I like this couple. I think I am Andrei’s only fan though lol. That said. He is really pushing it by not discussing things with Elizabeth like how long they are staying Moldova and that they are staying with his parents the whole time. Elizabeth goes to meet with her sisters and her mother to help her pick out her wedding dress. I love how the bridal assistant is no assistance at all. Her mother and her sisters are awful and have no respect for other cultures. Next week we are going to Moldova where the families will surely clash.
Tania & Syngin
Syngin is interviewing for a bartending job but Tania is worried that Syngin will get drunk, bust up the bar and get fired. AGAIN. Syngin has to get in the shower with Tania to help her out since she crushed her ankle or whatever in a car accident. Syngin talks too much in his job interview. He doesn’t even know how to pour a beer. Of course he stays at the bar and gets drunk. Tania is pissed when he gets home. Later she has a doctor’s visit. Her foot injury is quite severe. She may never be able to bartend again. She’s got to rely on Syngin, who is not very reliable. Syngin comes home drunk again.
Angela & Michael
Angela goes to draw up a will. I need to do that. I may draw a random name out of a hat with all your names and somebody will get aroud $25!!! LOL. She plans to leave half the house to Michael and the other half to the six grandkids. Michael’s K-1 visa is moving along. Her attorney tries to tell her to postpone her wedding for a month to a month and a half. If the K-1 visa was denied because of some sort of criminal background, they won’t qualify for the spousal visa either.
Angela is still worried that her daughter Skyla won’t agree to come to Nigeria. Skyla says she is going to stay with grandma she has to work, and can’t leave her kids. So now what will Angela do? Step one appears to get pissed off and wake up Michael. Michael can’t convince her either.
Kalani & Asuelu
These two are planning a trip to Samoa so that Asuelu’s family can meet the new twins. However, a major roadblock has put a kink in the plans. There is an outbreak of measles with the children in Samoa. Children are dying. Asuelu thinks it is still fine for them to go. Because, Asuelu is a bit slow and selfish. Kalani says that their youngest is too young for the measles shot at 7 months. She is going to call the doctor and ask about it. I say wait six or seven months, get the vaccine and reevaluated the measles epidemic then. But that would be the smart thing to do.
Kalani and Asuelu take all the kids to the doctor to discuss the trip to Samoa. Kalani is hand sanitizing the hell out of everything. She was ahead of her time. The doctor said that the baby is okay to get the MMR vaccine. Kalani points out that the other kid who is just a few months older really had an adverse reaction to the MMR vaccine. Seriously? And you want to give it to this one early? I’d question giving it to him at all. However, the doctor says it is safe for kids from 6-11 months to get it early if they need it. She does recommend not going to Samoa until the outbreak is over. He wants to vaccinate. She wants to wait. Mama’s decision is the only vote that counts. Asuelu is surprised the doctor is a woman.
Can’t wait for my favorite 90 Day franchise, THE OTHER WAY, tomorrow night when we finally get to Ethiopia. ! See you then, but it will be a bit late because I plan to do Below Deck Med first.