I’m quiet delayed starting this MAFS Australia recap. I’ve had a very stressful day. Some idiot kid kept walking back and for on the sidewalk behind my house. He had some sort of noisemaker that sounded like really loud firecrackers or gunshots and was using whatever it was on two occaisions when Banjo was out in the yard. It was really quite frightening. I was out of wine so I mad a mad dash to Kroger to get wine. I had a huge panic attack hyperventilated and sweated ten tons of water. Finally got home, had a tension headache and nausea. Now I am having some kidney(?) pain. Basically, I am coming apart at the seams. 🙁 But I really watch to watch this episode, so I am going to try to keep this short and sweet.
We start with the host saying that there are only four more singles to match. But actually there are four more couples to match! WTF? Maybe the other two couples are replacements because I don’t think the lesbian couple is going to last through another episode.
Mishel & Steve
Mishel, is a young in spirit mother of two grown kids from Brisbane, Qld who has suffered her fair share of heartache, including her divorce 15 years ago. She openly shares details of her dating disasters, admitting she has been cheated on in seven of her past eight relationships. Mishel finds the dating landscape increasingly difficult to navigate at her age and is hopeful the experiment will put an end to her quest to find a man who embraces her for who she is.
Just over a thousand miles away in Melbourne, Steve, is a 52 year old cancer survivor who is originally from the UK. He’s lived in Australia for the past 18 years and has a son in his 30s who still lies in England. He owns a barbershop. He has only been in love once and the relationship fell apart when he got cancer. Steve feels his life is sorted out other than his constant fear of spending the rest of his life alone and that has him finally making a change.
I’m not to sure about these two. Steve is a “old” fifty two and Mishel seems younger than her age. Steve is very, very worried about being rejected. Mishel has mention all her past experience with cheating more times than I can count. Mishel is also terrified and may throw up. Steve loves what he sees. It’s hard to say what Mishel is feeling so far. But overall, we are off to a good start with these two.
At the reception, things took a turn for the worse when Steve admits to Mishel’s daughter he has cheated on someone in the past. She cannot wait to run to her mother with the news. Things go south very quickly. Mishel needs a tequila shot and cigarette. Sadly, there is no tequila. Mishel flees the reception. The words cheater and cheating have been used so many times it feels like fake storyline. Every is very fond of Steve, except for Mishel. Until the bride and groom talk through it. And Mishel is back on board. They go back to the hotel, get in the bed and kiss and cuddle. So, yay?
Stacey & Michael
Stacey is a 25 year old law graduate from Adelaide, SA, has two boys who are toddlers, and a broken engagement. She has been scared to let someone else in because of her past family trauma. Now, she finally feels ready to let her walls down and give herself another chance at love. I find her to be totally fake. She’s 25 and already full of plastic surgery and seems like she’s just here for the camera time. Well, now I sort of feel bad. Her father died when she was one. Her brother took over the father role. Then on the day she was in the hospital giving birth, her brother died in a motorcycle accident.
Michael is a 28 year old single dad from Adelaide, SA who became a billionaire at 24. How fortunate that they found her a rich billionaire in her home town. It seems like she would have already known about him. He’s now ready to enter a relationship with a woman who will help keep him in line and be able to handle his sense of humor. This pairing is suspect. They have to run in the same circles. They both seem very… self absorbed and focused on their exterior. I think it is weird to have kids on this show.
Poor Stacey came down with food poisoning the night before her wedding and didn’t get much rest. Does the billionaire have a prenup? When Michael starts walking down the aisle, one of the female friends of the bride started saying, “No, No, No.. It’s not good.” When Michael sees Stacey, he is blown away. She really is quite pretty. She is not thrilled with what she sees. But, she’s the type that will come around when she sees his bank account.
Michael’s vows start off with a Forrest Gump quote and get increasingly more humorous from there. Stacey is not amused. At the reception Michael is a bit immature and loud and the center of attention. Stacey is even less amused. Michael is sort of over the whole looks thing and is realizing that Stacey is very standoffish and rude. Meanwhile the friend of Stacey’s who was all “no, no, no” has turned to “yes, yes, yes” once she Google the groom and found out he was rich. And just like that Stacey is back in. So she goes to talk privately with Michael.
The second hour begins with “the last four couples” going on their honeymoon. Again I have two more bios for two more couples.
Four More Honeymoons!
Aleks and Ivan are sent to a five start hotel on the gold coast. These two seem to be getting on well. Except, Ivan is on this business phone all the time. We don’t get much from this couple this week.
Stacey and Micheal head off to Figi for their honeymoon. They seem to be opening up a tiny bit. But after the cameras left they went to the bar and Michael got wasted and was an asshole and Stacey left him at the bar. Instead of apologizing the next morning he went on a run with his new friends. She’s pissed. Michael seems like a dick. These two are never going to make it. They seem to hate each other. These two have the hardest accents for me to understand. Later at a beach picnic, Stacey opens up about her father’s suicide and brother passing on the day she gave birth. She cries. Michael is sweet to her. Didn’t we see Stacey getting a dye job before the wedding? how does she have four inches of roots? On the final night of their honeymoon they consummate their marriage.
Connie and Jonethen’s honeymoon is at the beach in Broome. It looks like a sleepy beach town. They seem happy. I like this couple. These two have not kissed yet. Connie hasn’t been kissed in a year. But they are laughing together a lot! Finally at dinner they share their first kiss. It was quite a long one. And I love seeing Connie happy.
Is It Me Or Is Mishel Kind Of A Bitch?
Mishel and Steve are in Queenstown, New Zealand! Mishel wants to do all the extreme sports on offer, but Steve does not. This is what I meant earlier by Mishel being younger than her (so far unknown) age. He does agree to do a concrete luge race and then takes a nasty tumble onto the concrete. Is Mishel laughing at him? Oh! She is 48. 48 and 55 is a big age difference. Lots of stuff happens in those seven years and none of them are good. Mishel shows no sympathy to Steve regarding his accident and is pissed they only did the slow course. She’s highly competitive. She seems to be missing the empathy chip.
Steve doesn’t want to go skiing but takes Mishel skiing anyway. I’m starting to think if every man you have ever dated has cheated on you, perhaps the problem lies with you. Steve’s age changes all the time. I’ve seen it as 51, 52 and he said to Mishel at the reception he was 55. That’s weird. I love that Mishel falls a thousand times on the bunny hill. And then she complains. She’s the problem here. And Steve is over it. Steve needs to RUN. RUN STEVE, RUN! OMG she is swearing at him and telling him he lacks sympathy? She literally laughed at him when he had an accident on the luge. She is a horrible person.
Next week, the ten couples we have met so far get together for a dinner party. That looks interesting.