On the heels of the news of the day (Click Here If You Missed It) this should be a very interesting Pump Rules Recap. It will mark the last episode of Vanderpump Rules for four of the participants. I’m not upset about Stassi. I had the Vanderpump Rules marathon in the background today. She’s been a horrible person since season one. She’s an entitled twat and deserves what she is getting. I’m fond of Kristen despite her character flaws. I think that but for Stassi she would never have been involved in such a horrible act. I’ m also worried about her mental health now. Thankfully, she has a boyfriend by her side today. I’m glad she is not dealing with these consequences alone. I don’t think Max and Brett are bad people. I think they were stupid and immature and perhaps needed better role models in their lives.
Leave The Mamas Out Of It
Let’s get on with the show. Will it be the end of the road for the entire show? Time will tell I suppose. We pick back up with the Sandoval and Jax fight. We are right at the point when Sandoval brings up how badly Jax treats his mother, yet he expected her to show up and surprise him. Jax, Brittany and Lala all start screaming at Sandoval. Andy mutes Jax and Brittany and I am here for it. Can we just leave them muted? Jax has Tom’s name tattooed on him? How many names has he had tattooed on his body? That’s so weird.
It’s time for Scheana to continuously tell us she is not jealous of Dayna. She is so jealous of Dayna. When Charli takes Scheana’s side Kristen, Lala and Stassi all come for Charli. I personally didn’t enjoy Charli on this season. However, on social media, Charli has a TON of fans. So I expect that those coming back if there is another season will suddenly warm up to Charli as she appears to be the new it girl whether I like her or not. Also, who the hell is going to be friends with Katie next season? I hope she quits or they don’t ask her back because she has no storyline anymore.
Blow Job Interruptus?
Suddenly we are talking about Scheana going down on Brett in Palm Springs. He claims he stopped her mid blow up because he was with Dayna at the time. Dayna says that she feels better now that they admitted something happened. Because, she felt like Max was gaslighting her and making her seem crazy over the entire situation. Now one believes that Max stopped Scheana from giving him head. NOBODY.
Why Is James Still So Angry At Kristen?
It’s time to talk about James and his sobriety. During all of the flashback scenes, they show other cast mates. Some are crying, Sandoval and Ariana for sure. I’m not sure what Kristen is doing she seems to be turning her head so she doesn’t have to watch the scenes. She seems irritated. Jax teared up. Lala is crying. LVP is crying. Stassi, Ariana and Sandoval all talk about how much they love Raquel. That’s good, because she going to have a much bigger role next season. James cries. He was almost 11 months sober when this was filmed.
Kristen still looks pissed. She just whispered, “Such Bullshit.” Does she not believe he is sober? And asked Kristen what was going on and she didn’t want to say. Scheana asks James to apologize to Kristen for all the hurt he caused her. He says he already did that. Kristen says to James that if he was remorseful and had changed he wouldn’t have just come after her less than an hour ago. They role the clip of James screaming at Kristen for having a magical pussy and calling her a piece of shit. He was quite angry. LVP says that when the restaurants open back up, James has his C U Next Tuesday gigs back.
I Wish Lala Was Leaving Too
Lala is all in on James. She is a year and a half sober. Lala doesn’t take any ownership of her awful treatment of Raquel. Then she apologies to Raquel. Then, we move on to Lala’s awful treatment of and comments about Scheana. While James is a much better person sober. It seems Lala is simply a bad person at heart. Scheana cries about Lala’s comments about her. Lala cries and says she is disgusted by her behavior. Stassi turns to Beau and whispers, “I think Lala might be bipolar.” I wonder if she was on coke while filming last season.
Scheana says these were not isolated incidents. Lala was mean to her, Raquel, Ariana and Kristen all season long. Lala sucks at fake crying by the way. Like really sucks. Then we get more scenes of Lala’s horrible behavior. Lala says she realizes that she was “playing on the weak.” That’s sort of a back handed compliment. She can’t even fake apologize correctly.
After the break, Andy says, “We’re back with the Real Housewives of Oh Fuck!” What is he smoking? We get some home quarantine footage that is kind of funny. I’m going to miss Brett and Max. Can’t we get rid of Jax and Lala instead? They are truly awful people. And Brett and Max seem good at heart even if they lost there way for a bit several years ago. LVP pretends she and Ken do not have their housekeeper locked in a closet someone and that she is scrubbing floors and doing laundry.
We get to see Kristen quarantined with her boyfriend Alex. These two (and two little dogs) went grocery shopping together today. Kristen was wearing a black baseball cap and looked incredibly sad. Even Jax says Alex is an awesome guy. I am so glad she has him in her life today.
Jax Need To Be Fired Next
On to Jax straight up lying to Brittany about not enjoying the strip clubs the guys took him to for his bachelor party. And once again we get to see him going hog wild motorboating strippers and making it rain. Brittany said that she told him she didn’t care about the strippers. So she has no idea why he lied. Then we talk about Jax being such an asshole to Tom. Today I saw the episode where Jax fell into Kristen’s magic pussy while Tom and Kristen were living together as a couple. He has ZERO remorse. He repeatedly said he didn’t feel bad about it at all. Now he is saying that the only reason Tom wanted to be best man was to ensure he has camera time on the episode.
Tom is enraged by this. LVP tells Jax, if that was the case, why did Sandoval go to your father funeral? She points out that Tom has been a very good friend to him. Tom says he flew fifteen hours and bought three suits to go to that funeral. Jax doesn’t give a shit. Jax says that Tom is an amazing actor. Everyone says that is not fair. EVERYONE. Ariana says if he was that good of an actor he would not be on Vanderpump Rules. ROFLMAO. True. God this is taking forever. I am typing too many words.
The Toms Need Their Own Show, Periodt
When we return from commercial, it is seven pm in NYC and everyone rings bells and claps for the frontline Covid 19 works then. That was so sweet to hear. I’m glad they left that in. Aw… the Toms did videos on Cameo or something similar to raise money for the Tom Tom employees. I don’t know why this is making me so emotional. They raised over $50K for the Tom Tom employees. I’m not crying you are. WTF is wrong with me?
Schwartz really wants to open his own bar with Sandoval and Katie. He wants to have a restaurant empire like LVP! I hope he does! If this show doesn’t come back, I am going to have to have a show with the Toms. Even if that means Katie has to be on it.
Who Will Scheana Throw Herself At Next Season?
Next up we move on to the Brett and Scheana situation. But is there a situation? Scheana is screaming a Brett who seems like in the present is such a nice guy and all she is mad about is that he didn’t want to have sex with her. Then she invented some fake video so she could molest him. Could you imagine if the genders were reversed in this scenario? Brett says Scheana asked him to pretend like they might have something in the future. I believe that 100%. Kristen and Danica (?) come after Brett to support Scheana. Why? She acted like a bitch in heat all season! AGAIN.
And Now For The Witches Of Weho
I do love that Kristen said what everyone is thinking about Schwartzy fucking around on Katie. You know he is getting laid somewhere. And it ain’t with Katie. Katie says that was “just Kristen going low” she doesn’t even try to deny it. Kristen says she was there for Katie when she was going through that and just wanted her friends to be there for her like she was for them. I think it is for the best that Kristen if off this show. Everyone treats her like garbage. Is she perfect? No, but they are all pretty vile people for the most part. And Kristen just keeps getting shat on.
Even Beau says that he and all of her friends were just exhausted by her constant venting about Carter. I get that to a point. But there are better ways to convey that emotion than treating her like garbage. Katie is trying to act like some sort of martyr here. PLEASE let Katie leave with Stassi and Kristen. Please. I hate these people. Kristen admits to some culpability in these three breaking up. That was mature of her. Everyone is happy that Kristen is with Alex who everyone agrees is an amazing guy.
HOLY CRAP! THERE IS A THIRD PART OF THIS SHIT SHOW??? NOE! JUST NOE!! It looks like it is going to be Sandoval and Ariana versus Jax and Brittany. Whose side will you be on?