How is everyone holding up? I am sleeping on and off all the time. Banjo consistently wakes me up when it is time for him to eat or go outside. I don’t want to write recaps. Then I want to write a recap. I have no schedule anymore. I’ve lot any sense of a schedule. I cry a lot. I drink way too much. I am exceedingly lonely. I hate everyone. I’m going back to bed. How are you?
Today is beyond beautiful. The world keeps spinning and the sun keeps shining and the leaves and flowers are budding. The air is a cool comfort.
On a day much like today 29 years ago my father died of a heart attack at 50. We buried him on a similarly gorgeous spring day a few days later. I was struck by the beauty at a time of unfathomable grief; it seemed so incongruent.
But it was a lesson that despite the sorrow and grief wrapping itself around our days, earth abides and life goes on. My heart is so heavy today for the suffering and pain you and others are experiencing. The frustration of not being able to make it better is mind numbing. All I can do is hold on and get through today. I wish you all some respite, and a bit of sunshine today, wherever you are.
This was like a beautiful prayer of gratitude and compassion — a perfect way to start the day.
Wow. This is so beautiful! I am sorry for your loss. I miss my Mama every day.
Working from home M-W-F which is nice, but I don’t want to cook. My fat flame point Siamese thinks that since I am home and working in the recliner that I am also cat furniture so he’s sprawled on my lap and complains every time I get up. I took Friday off but continued to check email and manage things from home; I’d really like to take a week off and go see my mom….
I’ve been drinking a lot more than usual too. I exercise (an ancient Tracey Anderson dvd) and then think I am entitled to a glass of wine. At noon.
Sorry you are alone, but judging from the response to the “asshole” post, you’ve got lots of friends out there.
I have a house full of grown kids and their boyfriends. It’s a lot. They’ve reverted back to being clueless, messy teenagers. We are going to our vacation house in Upstate NY to get away from them at some point. It is 30 acres of woods and farmland so I don’t think I’d even see another person, let alone spread any germs. There’s a wine cellar there too.
Wow. Must be nice. Can I come? I live in Montana. But I own a home in Houston Texas.
We can trade spaces. What was that movie— the Holiday?
Call me one of those non-essentials essentials, been at the workplace all through this.
Happy 4th everyone!
TamTam keep your chinz up!
Would love a recipe open post as I made MizGrandma’s hash pinwheels (without cheese sauce, too rich for my system). Yum yum yummy!!!
A recipe post! I would love a recipe toast. Did I read about one that was here when the Cat Lady Uprising was going on? We have been doing OK — not perfect — of sticking to keto. The Instant Pot is a Godsend. Along with Trader Joe’s sausage!
Too afraid to go to TJ’s so far. Fear it would be a mosh pit.
Requesting easy ramen recipes tho!
(BTW, Nanette you rock!)
In Calif. (and I think nationwide ), TJ started implementing safety measures before the government even set guidelines/requirements. Wiping down every cart before and after use, taping off, etc. People allowed in at one time are limited — depending on the size of the store. They are keeping a near-full staff on duty (hours limited or sabbatical if employees need or request). So there is almost always a live person to answer phone calls quickly.
Thank you for the “rock” comment. In my mind, I’m still a 25-year-old rock ‘n’roll chick. LOL.
I think the site may be under attack. I am getting a bazillion illiterates trying to comment on the Cynthia Bailey post. So I try to reject some for total illiteracy and they just keep coming. Like fifty comments ever five minutes. I’m going back to bed.
OMG I just went over and started reading them and they are hilarious!
Where did these commenters come from? A bunch of the illiteracy came through for sure.
So I sent my friend an SOS. I needed something to eat. Not because I don’t have anything to eat but because, Can’tn seem to eat, So he sent a couple loaves of bread, some cheese and those kind of not really cooked super thing ham slices, Not exactly the most inspiring thing at first glance, But I sliced the bread, added the cheese at the time I had a tomato, and put the ham on top. IT WAS DELICIOUS! So I went to reorder the bread and ham . The cheese was not all that melty. PLUS he sent a ton of cheese. It’s like eleventy billion dollars for this ham (and bread)! And now that I am paying for it, I’m being all scare with the ham. lol. But it is really the best thing that has happened to me in quarantine.
Also I ran out for the essentials just now, smokes and beer. lol I didn’t freak out wearing it for the first time! But the entire trip probably took 15 minutes and there was already a dent in my face from the mask. This mask has a respirator and is a lot. And the guy took my beer to the car for me and he put a mask on to do that. It was trippy BUT I DID NOT HAVE A PANIC ATTACK! I have to say, my accomplishment of wearing the mask for 15 minutes and still having marks on my face
Jesus Christ! The malls are opening today and morons are going to the mall. I just can’t. Back to bed.
Fantastic news about not having an anxiety attack! Well done you!! One day at a time. One step at a time!
Woo fucking hoo! No panic attack is such good news. Having necessities— beer and ciggies — also good.
David Lebovitz had a live thing on IG (from Paris, natch) making a ham sandwich with the GOOD ham on the GOOD country baguette (it mixes in whole wheat flour, who knew?), and the GOOD butter, NO mayo. French butter, but he said use Irish or whatever good kind you can find. I have been CRAVING that sandwich, and I don’t really like ham. I thought of you when I saw it. I had forgotten that my French grandma made them with butter. Mmmmm…
Further proof you’re f-ing awesome, you watch David Leibovitz on the IG!!!
Wait till your tomatoes come up this summer TT, they’ll be another thing to add to your plate to perk ya up!
Hang in there everyone!xx
You made it, sweetie! Good for you. ❤️
Proscuitto is the “not so cooked ham” and it’s delicious
Good for you TT! Baby steps!
I’m still in a shit mood.
Haven’t seen a cent of unemployment and I’ve been out of work since March 15th. Watching my savings dwindle and my credit card debt escalate. Oh well, it will sort itself out.
Florida unemployment is a complete and total disaster. Gov Ron DeSantis is giving ANOTHER press conference about it today. Almost 2 million people have filed and only 730,000 paid. At least I’m not alone.
Restaurant opened for takeout three days ago. Hubs is back at work.
We had this thing, we’d walk to the beach (about 1.75 miles, can’t get on the beach yet), workout, then order togo food from this place we love, drink beers and listen to music while we waited. I’ll miss that.
Our pool is still closed but we go to friend’s pools.
” I am still in a shit mood ” is a great tagline for an open forum.
Can we save that tagline for a rainy day when the next celebrity COVIDIOT makes an appearance with TT and JOJOFLL permission?
My positive this evening is TT kicking ass at shopping with no anxiety attack.
Baby Steps
Hahaha! You have my permission. I usually go from shit mood to drunk.
And also with you. I am currently in the hospital hoping to be sprung. I am oh so ready to go home where I can pee whenever my little heart desires. Being all wired up really slows me down. I am doing really well getting better though. I could not walk four weeks ago. My doctors are hot shit and are taking great care of me as are all their colleagues. People who are working in health care, especially now, are my kinda bad asses. I cry a lot too. It is cathartic and helps me get centered and deal with my stress and worries. You will be OK too. You are a special person to me, and this site gives me happiness and nice people to blah blah with.
Aw sweetie, so sorry you are in the hospital, I’ve been trying to shoot you an email. Email me at tamaratattles on the G
I hope you are home soon so you can drink copious amounts of beer or wine or Champagne or Aperol sprtizes, or Dr Pepper, or WHATEVER and pee your heart out — when YOU want.
Blessings to you. I hope that you continue to recover and be well.
https://www.nytimes.com/2020/05/04/us/coronavirus-updates.html?campaign_id=60&emc=edit_na_20200504&instance_id=0&nl=breaking-news&ref=cta®i_id=65264220&segment_id=26577&user_id=97749b9f765226e13ac9f7a52c184c57
OMG…that is nuts 200k cases a day?!? Don’t think that estimate will touch it with covidiots out there. Wow. I know economy can’y continue to tank but I guess I value lives. I am so happy you got the essentials the other night… not a soul in site & he was behind plastic shield. I was so thankful!! With all these mass gatherings I am afraid what life will be like in a few weeks. Can we rewind to Feb?!?
Don’t worry about recaps worry about you! I honestly enjoy reading how everyone is doing so you can tell when things are as good as possible!!
One of links is to a story about the “non medical” hospital workers who died. Among them, three who were responsible for distributing and keeping inventory of the masks and gloves to doctors and nurses but it seems that they didn’t get the PPE. Within weeks, they were dead. That one got me like no other story/report so far.
That’s so sad and disturbing.
Pretty sad that the hospital made that awful choice…their poor family!! I know when I was in all employees at least got a mask. You have to wonder is that enough. These people are ALL rockstars & should be treated as such.
That’s fucking heartbreaking and unconscionable ???
That’s great that you got out to the store with less anxiety. You should be very proud of yourself. NY is still on lockdown so we get home delivered groceries. The downside is they are often out of items. Our lockdown was extended to May 15th but obviously it’s going to be extended further than that. We are feeling the meat shortage already. I wonder if others are too? No ham whatsoever, difficult to get chicken, but beef is more abundant. And rarely can we get toilet paper or paper towels on a week day. It seems like it’s only available on the weekends so if you order groceries during the week forget about getting paper towels or TP with your order. The hoarding of toilet paper is very strange – why does everyone need so much TP?
Important Question- Is Big Brother going to happen this summer?
It is literally the only thing I have to look forward to right now. My six year was sobbing today when I told him we can’t go to the beach this summer and the pool would be closed all summer. Then I started crying and have been trying to avoid a mental breakdown since. I just want my kids to play with other kids. But I would rather go crazy than chance my kids getting sick.
I also look forward to Drag Race and the Secret Celebrity Drag Race. It is feel good television! I cry every time.
No BB. I recommend Australian Survivor seasons 3-6 on Dailymotion. Don’t know if that will help your son but it might help you? They are 26 eps each so you really get to know the people and their backstories. Most eps are two parts so do a search for Australian Survivor Season 3 Episode 1 and you’ll be on your way.
LA, Myrtle Beach is open for business. All my friends and family were posting beach photos.
Destin, Florida is also open.
TT thank you for being you – and for introducing me to your friend 🙂 I am so very grateful. Here in Philly, we now have 15K covid cases. The weather is so beautiful, and I am enjoying the downtown view as I type this. I’ve listening to some amazing gospel music to keep me going. My Dad has Stage 4 cancer, and he broke his hip last week due to the cancer. Thank God, he was admitted to a great rehab hospital, and I am praying he walks again so he will not go to a nursing home. Great news is that the oncologist said he still has years of life left!!! It’s been two months since hubby left to work in California, and we don’t know when we will see him again. Good news is I went from crying like 5 times a day to now crying maybe once a day. I also bought a trampoline to try to get fit. Baby steps! Sending love and well wishes to everyone!
I’m so sorry Lyn! That has to be tough being away from your husband!
I’m sure your dad will be just fine!
Prayers for you and your dad. My neighbor got a trampoline. Trying Yo keep the grandkids active. You could gear their laughter from the street as we walked by. It gets your lymph system going too — facilitates weight loss.
Hang in their Lyn! They fact you have reduce the crying shows a strength in you! I hope your hubby will be able to join you, soon! My biggest fear is that they are going to up & see high risk needs to shelter in place. I hate that others have to live this life because it is mine 90% of time in good situation. It’s isolating & lonely. I wish we could just go back in time! Much love to you! ?
got all the plants into the pots and ground that i have on hand including the seedlings i started. but more plants are coming this week. we are at least 2 weeks behind where we usually are in spring. might have peonies for memorial day.
broke down and bought paper towels and toilet paper at the local store and they just don’t compare to my beloved bounty half sheet paper towels and the cartoon bear family toilet paper in roll size and quality i get at sam’s club.
i put the cat on a diet and he brought home two baby bunnies yesterday – one for his supper and one for his breakfast. at least he burned a couple calories hunting them and bringing them home.
and i hate that damn mask, feel claustrophobic when i wear it, can’t wait to get in the car and rip it off. but the transmission rate between the infected mask wearers and the uninfected mask wearers is 1.5% so i wear it.
Working from home so I roll out of bed at 6:55 to start working at 7. Drinking ENTIRELY too much which means we go to the store often and then buy other stuff so we don’t look like we’re only there for the drinks. My freezers are packed. I keep getting angry at my coworkers who I suspect login and then do whatever because she don’t respond to emails. I really just want to go back to normal even though that means less sleep.
Have y’all seen the meme where Yoda is holding a fifth of Jack Daniels and saying, “May the fifth be with you”?
The weather was absolutely beautiful here today. Bright and sunny, temps in the low 80s, low humidity. It could not have been a more beautiful day. I swear the flowers smell sweeter this year. Maybe without as much pollution we can smell them better. I had to run to the grocery store to pick up some things, and there was a guy standing on the sidewalk playing the accordion when I came out. He played “I Can’t Help Falling in Love With You” as I was loading my groceries into my car. I was hoping he would play “La Vie en Rose” after but he didn’t.
Tamara, I am so glad you were able to successfully go out for essentials today. And I couldn’t care less about recaps – you take care of you.
If anyone is looking for something lighthearted and fun to watch, Dragnificent comes on TLC at 11 tonight. It is about a bunch of drag queens who come give makeovers to straight women, and just generally help them feel better about themselves. It is hilarious, and Tamara, it is not something you would recap – just watch and enjoy!
I just wanted to remind everyone to really take care of your mental health. I’ve had mental health problems my whole life, but with everything going on in the world things really came to a head with me. To sum up, I ended up in the psych ward on a hold and it, with one exception, was the worst couple of days of my life. Everyone, please, please take care of yourselves and look out for your loved ones. This is a rough time for us all and my prayers are with Tamara and everyone on this site. I don’t know any of you but I read this everyday and y’all are some really interesting, loving people. We’ll get through this somehow.
Suzy,
God bless you and take good care of yourself.
Blessings to everyone, stay safe.?
Thanks so much! ?
Thank God you’re out. One night in the J-Ward (the mental ward in Contra Costa County) was enough for me to have an understanding of a BIT of what you went through. Depression and anxiety can quickly get overwhelming. If you haven’t tried CBD oil yet, the studies are going on, but it works for me. The Serenity Prayer too. Don’t borrow trouble — think only about what you CAN control, etc. Easy to say, harder to do.
I hope your doing ok Suzy!! Much love to you!!
Thanks, that means a lot! ?
Whatever it is that I am supposed to be doing, I am assured that I am doing it all wrong! Don’t care anymore and haven’t watched the news in 3 days now.
I’ve been holding up okay but today, I’m acting my ass off. It’s my husband’s birthday which is historically tough for him because it’s also the anniversary of his dear grandmother’s passing as well as his best friend from high school. 🙁 Traditionally I spend the day trying to make him forget the sad stuff and focus on happy, fun things. With the virus, it’s been a struggle but my husband has been reasonably upbeat, all things considered. I was just about to give him his birthday presents when I found out a close friend of mine died suddenly, cause unknown. A perfectly healthy, athletic 36 year old should not die like this. I ugly cried for a good 10 minutes, splashed some cold water on my face and said nothing to my husband, nor will I for a few days yet, he didn’t know my friend well and I will not pile on to the sadness he associates with his birthday. It is taking everything I’ve got to shove my feelings to the side and laugh and joke with my guy as I normally would to celebrate his day. Being able to express all of this here, since I can’t do so elsewhere (or in any way he won’t see/hear) helps…it’s a release.
?What a great friend you are to your hubby to keep trying to make his birthday happy. Oscar nominee caliber. Sorry about your friend.
Thanks for sharing with us Nic. You sound like an awesome partner. I’m so sorry about your friend, it’s truly horrific. I hope today will be better and maybe you can have some time for yourself.
Sorry for your loss! Such a selfless person to not share as to ruin your hubbys day. I hope his day was as good as it could be. Make sure to take care of you too! ?
So glad you have people helping you out with groceries and such. All of us here love you and your site. As you know, I also suffer from depression, anxiety, and alcohol abuse. I have found that even doing the simplest things each day like emptying the dishwasher give me a sense of accomplishment. Some days, like today, I kicked ass around the house getting things done, and other days I can barely get out of bed. Everyone handles things differently and do what is best for you! Sending love from MN.
“Not well bitches!” I’m not well. Tired beyond belief and so scared all day every day. Sleep? I’m exhausted, sleep a few hours at a time.
Every day we get to the end, I am amazed. Our staff and our residents our bugging out, it’s ugly. But we’re still covid free (after too many close calls) but we made it through another day. “Opening up” is not something that can be considered in any ling term care facility, it’s just NOT an option.
Sorry guys, I had to vent a little.
Kipper, I’ve been missing your posts! Please take care of yourself!
Thank you! Hang in there. Keep us posted! It’s a fucking nightmare in these facilities. What’s happened in NY and NJ is terrifying. I can’t imagine the strain you’re under.
My elderly aunt in Pennsylvania was supposed to move into a home in Staten Island in June to be closer to family in NY and NJ-she gave them a deposit. We don’t want her to go now.
Such a scary situstion for you!! Thank god all are well…will keep you in my thoughts. More rockstars!!?
Happy Mother’s day to all our mothers here! I thank all the Morhers who made TT and followers, your mommy’s did a great job making these humans right here and did plenty more than mothering I’m sure!
I have to apologize for taking a bit of a break guys. I don’t know why I needed to go radio silent but I did.
II just read your supportive comments and can’t thank you enough, I really can’t , thank you.
We are still covid free. Our state is not great with handling this virus, even worse the outbreak on the Navajo Nation (99% of our residents are native Americans) is alarming. None the less, with close calls coming almost daily now, even with staffing issues we have such a great core of loyal loving employees that keep us upright every day!
Hugs TT, Banjo and crew, I need to go call my Mommy now ?…