Here we are again for another Summer House recap! In the spirit of honesty, I must admit I lost a day. I am writing this up a day late because I honest to God forgot that yesterday was Wednesday. I watched Ozark instead of Summer House. It’s a Corona side effect I have only heard about until now.
We pick up where we left off last week with Carl yelling at Jules. Jordan has had enough. He packs his bags and leaves. No amount of Carl and Kyle eye candy will keep Jordan in a house he’s clearly not wanted in. Amanda and Paige console a sobbing Jules. Carl is such a prick. Hannah talks to Carl, who doubles down on his prick-ness. Hannah has me shaking my head. She is seemingly choosing Jordan over Jules, who she brought into the house. Best news of this episode: Jules and Craig hit it off! She stayed overnight with him outside of the house. There is literally no better payback for dealing with the amount of shit she has dealt with thus far. It would be worth it all for one night with Craig.
Justice For Jules
The next morning everyone wakes up tired and hungover. Hannah and Luke hooked up but didn’t have sex. Luke wants to wait until he sorts out his feelings for Jelena and Hannah. Jules confirms that she spent the night with Craig! YES! Jules takes Hannah aside to ask her why she would back Jordan over Jules. Hannah apologizes for hurting Jules. She is mad at Paige and Amanda for throwing her under the bus. Then,Hannah takes Paige and Amanda aside to tell them about her conversation with Jules. Hannah feels like she was used as a scapegoat.
Paige wants to hold a house meeting to clear all this up. Kyle feels awkward but it’s a necessary meeting. Jules says that she was willing to put Jordan stuff aside to have a good time for Kyle’s birthday. Carl says that Jules is disconnected from everyone. Jules starts crying. She says it’s a tough group to connect with. Jules asks for a second chance. Why? Her contract should be enough. Anyway, everyone “decides” to give her another chance. This makes me so mad. With the amount of drama each and every fucknut brought over the summer, how dare they do this to Jules? Unreal.
Trouble In PaigeHannahville
Back in the city, Lindsay invites Hannah to a laser removal event she’s hosting. Hannah gets some hair removed while filling in Lindsay on all that happened over the weekend. Hannah still feels hurt about Paige and Amanda telling Jules about what she said. Lindsay is pisssed. She says that Paige and Amanda are very cliquey. She thinks of Hannah as a little sister so she hates to see her hurt.
In her talking head, Lindsay says what we all feel. Who knew that kicking someone out of the house was a thing? If it is, she has a list of people way ahead of Jules! Hahah. In the meantime, Paige meets up with her parents. She tells her dad that Perry asked Paige to move in. She declined as she’s not ready. Smart girl! Paige tells her parents that she feels closer to Amanda than Hannah this summer. Interesting.
Amanda Seals Her Fate
Wow, we’re already back in the Hamptons! Kyle and Amanda arrive first. They bring food in without washing it all down. Remember those times? Everyone else arrives. It’s Lindsay’s birthday so she’s throwing herself a murder mystery party. Stephen is going to be there! Paige and Amanda go off to gossip. Paige is worried about Hannah and Luke. She doesn’t want to see Hannah get hurt.
Kyle tells the rest of the group that Carl is fucking up. Carl is noticeably drunk. Kyle says that Carl missed a day of work and didn’t report to the COO, who oversees Carl at work. Kyle set it up that way as to have no conflict of interest where Carl is concerned. Smart thinking. Just not smart to hire Carl in the first place. It does speak to Kyle’s heart and loyalty. He truly wants Carl to grow the fuck up.
Speaking of stupid, Amanda announces at the dinner table that she is now full time employed at Loverboy. UGH. This marriage is going to happen folks. She can’t get out now. Judgey rant coming: I actually like Amanda and Kyle. Separately. I don’t want to see them hurt each other to the point they lose the great qualities they each have. I feel like they both have good hearts and both are loyal to those they care about. If you haven’t seen the movie “The War of the Roses”, check it out. It could be their future. In this version, I would love to see Lindsay in the Danny Devito role!
The Mystery Of Why Paige Continuously Gossips About Hannah
Lindsay decides to call Luke out about Jelena. Luke says he ended things with Jelena. He STILL isn’t over his ex. Luke wants to take it slow with Hannah because he doesn’t want to hurt her. Carl makes a drunken ass of himself at dinner. He’s so stupid. He’s salty because Sarah didn’t fall for his bullshit.
After dinner, Paige and Jules are (shocker!) gossiping. Paige attempts to gossip with Lindsay who promptly shuts it down. Lindsay wants her to focus on her own relationship instead of Hannah’s. Lindsay goes to tell Hannah what Paige just said. To Lindsay’s credit, she calls Paige out, face to face, on her gossiping behind Hannah’s back. Paige can’t handle it so she walks away. Good on Lindsay! Paige tells Amanda what happened the next morning. Amanda is surprised, probably at the forthrightness of Lindsay.
Stephen arrives for Lindsay’s murder mystery party. Everyone gets dressed in their best roaring 20’s duds. Kyle, as always, wins for most committed to his role. He looks and sounds like a black and white movie. This is one of the reasons I really do like him. Lindsay, Hannah and Danielle sit to talk more. Lindsay is upset that Hannah doesn’t speak up to Amanda and Paige. Hannah said that she did speak to them but they don’t remember throwing her under the bus. Lindsay says this is unacceptable. She wants Hannah to grow some balls where those two are concerned. Hannah looks confused as to why she should do that.
Next week on Summer House: Carl dresses up as Lindsay. Amanda and Kyle pick a wedding venue. Lindsay and Stephen become official. Carl is pissed about that. Hannah and Paige seem to argue. Cheers to the end of a great episode! The cracks of the Hannah/Paige relationship are showing. How do you feel about that? Let me know in the comments! Thank you for your patience with this being so late. I hope you all are safe, healthy and staying home!