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You are here: Home / Entertainment News / Tomato Talk! Let’s All Make Urine Gardens!

Tomato Talk! Let’s All Make Urine Gardens!

March 27, 2020 by tamaratattles 56 Comments

Tomato TalkI mean, WTF? Kanye West is making a Urine Garden in Wyoming? “In the illustrations for the space-age wild West manse is something called a “bio pool,” as well as a “urine garden,” described as an “aquaponic-like system that converts human waste into plant food.”

I mean whatever.

In other news, my tomato plants are growing like weeds and may bear fruit earlier than expected. I attribute this to the forty days and forty nights of rain. Sorry. Mostly drunk posts are all you are going to get.  And Banjo has been oddly clingy today. I just realized that may I did or maybe I did not feed him yesterday. I’m a terrible dog owner. He has eaten now. And that seemed to be what he wanted. Or maybe I did feed him and it’s just dinner time. Because it is. I am always suspect when he starts paying me a lot of attention.

Also, the fine Christian family that has moved in next door is such an amazing change from the guy that was trying to kill me and constantly videoing my house. They have his amazing kid who had some sort of play date today. They check on me just enough. But would it be wrong to ask them to water the hydrangea on the side of their house they never see?

Apologies in advance for being drunker and stupider than ever. I am watching Survivor and it is taking me forever because I want to savor every minute of it. I promise to get Cho’s recap up eventually. MOSTLY because I want to tell him what an idiot he is. lol. I love teasing my favorite nephew. Please don’t spoil me in comments and save it for when I get the recap up.

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About tamaratattles

Come for the tea. Stay for the shade. Not for the easily offended. You're a special snowflake just like everyone else.

Comments

  1. atdnext says

    March 27, 2020 at 5:25 pm

    Well, I’m glad the creeper neighbor is finally gone. Hopefully, the new family will work out better.

    A friend ordered a hydroponic indoor garden for me last week, so I’m eagerly awaiting its arrival. In the meantime, I have a little pine tree (yes, it’s my leftover “Living Christmas Tree”) that I’m tending to.

    I do still walk my neighborhood every day. Otherwise, I’ve officially become an elderly shut-in. I don’t even go to any grocery stores any more: I use Instacart whenever shoppers are available, and I used a local delivery service last week when Instacart was all booked up.

    Reply
    • Callipatti says

      March 27, 2020 at 7:23 pm

      We ordered a tri-tip & barbecue chicken dinner, my first food order. Great dinner. When delivered he rang bell then stepped way back. After I answered he told me total, cash or card accepted, he laid receipt wth small zip lock for the payment , he brought food boxes in a box set it down about 4’ away from me. Proceeded in that vein. Very safe. He wore gloves plus I knew the place from back when we could eat at a table.

      My plum trees were covered with blooms, dreading the amount of plums this year. Had a hard rain a few weeks ago that knocked 1/2 blooms off then rain and hail yesterday, very few blooms left.

      Reply
      • Nanette says

        March 27, 2020 at 8:39 pm

        Make plum shrub (drinking vinegar). Sounds weird, but tastes fantastic. It’s easier than wine and you can add it to cocktails or to seltzer for delicious non-alcoholic beverages.

        Reply
        • Callipatti says

          March 28, 2020 at 12:43 pm

          Thank you for the idea. Canning plums is a lot for little pay off.

          Reply
  2. tamaratattles says

    March 27, 2020 at 5:30 pm

    Also, number of people I killed today… ZERO, ZERO! NOT ONE! See? I am doing just fine. Also sorry I am not getting though my emails I’m trying.

    Reply
  3. JoJoFLL says

    March 27, 2020 at 5:41 pm

    Ooh! Christmas!

    I’m going to bring out my expensive Christmas candles I buy right after Christmas.

    My favorites are Tommy Bahama, Volupsa, and every year I get Frasier Fir by Thymes at The Grove Park Inn.

    Beer here and SEASON TREE OF OZARK!!!!!!!

    It’s really hot here. Almost 90 yesterday.

    I almost killed a native Florida, no water, direct sun plant here. I have a black thumb, give them all to the hubs.

    Reply
    • tamaratattles says

      March 27, 2020 at 5:43 pm

      You always make me think of Captain Lee. I had these seeds for Mary Anne. Not sure if I sent them or not. 🙁

      Reply
      • JoJoFLL says

        March 27, 2020 at 7:59 pm

        Hahaha! I meant to say I almost killed a native Florida plant not a native Florida.

        That’s because Captain Lee and I both live in Fort Lauderdale proper and not out in the boonies of South Florida. Not that anything is wrong with the boonies, The Rock lives in Southwest Ranches.

        I always think of YOU when I see Captain Lee!

        Reply
  4. JustJenn says

    March 27, 2020 at 5:43 pm

    Happy Friday! I feel a bit better today as I am not drinking. I will not be consuming any alcohol until this is all over as it makes my crazy worse. Glad to hear the tomatoes are thriving! One of these years I will join you in planting some. 🙂

    Reply
    • tamaratattles says

      March 27, 2020 at 5:49 pm

      It’s not too late! I should not be drinking either. Especially hard liquor. OBVI. Apologies in advance and well in the past and I GET THAT DRINKING IS NOT GOOD FOR THE CRAZY. Sigh #selfsabotage. I am also not drinking water and not eating. I suck at self care.

      Reply
      • Daintyfeets says

        March 28, 2020 at 2:31 am

        Yep. It sounds like you do. However, drag yourself out of your drunken haze and feed Banjo regularly. He shouldn’t be going a day without food.

        Reply
    • atdnext says

      March 27, 2020 at 6:41 pm

      You have way more self-control. I popped into my bottle of whiskey a little earlier because it’s Friday and I’m trying to get through the plague. I just ordered some sushi on GrubHub, so I guess this is the new version of my best life.

      Reply
  5. Margaret says

    March 27, 2020 at 6:09 pm

    The Bronx Zoo has bathrooms at their entrances that use composting toilets and greywater irrigation. They were put in more than 10 years ago instead of replacing the septic system. They were clean, not smelly, and surrounded by lush plant life when I was there on 95+ day in August. Calling it a urine garden is sensationalist.

    Reply
    • Margaret says

      March 27, 2020 at 6:11 pm

      Kanye is sensationalist using that term.

      Reply
      • Cindy says

        March 27, 2020 at 9:33 pm

        Prince Charles has the same type of system at Highgrove. I saw it on a documentary years ago. According to him, it’s very ecological, but it still creeps me out!

        Reply
    • JoJoFLL says

      March 27, 2020 at 8:05 pm

      When I lived in Garden City Beach, SC while I was training for marathons, I used to get up at 4AM and start my long runs (ten to twenty miles). Most of my neighbors used grey water to water their landscaping.

      I had to be very aware of the sprinklers going off and hosing me down with grey water.

      It stunk to high heaven.

      Reply
    • BeetsWhy says

      March 28, 2020 at 1:37 am

      Sadly, that is how media works today: sensationalistic. Composting is not new or revolutionary it’s just not the first choice when dealing with grey water. Too many dollars to be made by ignoring that option.

      Reply
  6. Queenjen says

    March 27, 2020 at 7:34 pm

    It sounds like the kind of biowaste system i had going when I was living in ‘Australia’s greenest house’ in the early oughties. It used a system that turned everything that went into the toilets into potable drinking water and had a tank that grew what I called ‘poo flowers’. Except our state government was still so strict that we had no access to this water and weren’t allowed to use it for watering any garden growing food for consumption etc. At the time the guy who developed and installed the system was getting huge jobs in China and New Zealand. I haven’t seen Kanye’s system but I bet this is what it is. Sunlight does a lot of the work converting the waste to drinking water.

    Reply
    • Nanette says

      March 27, 2020 at 8:42 pm

      Guessing from his past actions, Kanye will find a way to market the pee farms and make a fortune.

      Reply
      • Calipatti says

        March 28, 2020 at 4:48 pm

        Nanette, I’m in the central coast calif between Salinas Monterey off Huey 68.
        About where are you.
        People that have not been here don’t understand how very different our locations are.

        Reply
        • Calipatti says

          March 28, 2020 at 4:50 pm

          Highway = Huey
          I don’t even know a Huey

          Reply
  7. Lorelli says

    March 27, 2020 at 8:49 pm

    We all need to be a little drunker in these times. I’m farther north than you but I’m digging in the dirt this weekend! Hello from O-H-I-O!

    Reply
    • Kdwagz says

      March 27, 2020 at 9:18 pm

      Same in the NY metro area, the hotbed of all disease. It was in the 60’s here and I emptied my very full compost container. I also had a brewski before 5 pm (and a white claw). I’m not picky.

      Reply
  8. I Can’t Ever Remember What I Used Here says

    March 27, 2020 at 9:25 pm

    I am in Tulsa, Ok. Working from home, and have 4 kids home with me! 2 are on the spectrum, but they are teenagers. Sometimes that is great, sometimes it’s not. We can’t really go anywhere, so wine is my refuge for now. It’s showing in my belly, but I guess that’s the price I pay for sanity during this time? Also, I have 2 in the Navy (twins)! He’s in the ocean somewhere and can’t port for at least 2 1/2 more months (due to the virus), so he can only email. She is stuck on an island, but I can talk to her. We have a glass of wine together when she has time! Everyone has to to what they have to do to get through this. A good glass of wine and your site is something to look forward to at the end of the day! I’m glad banjo isn’t ok and that you have decent neighbors, but how is your yard set up so a guy can come poop in it? Just wondering, because I have some crazy neighbors that I could see doing something like that, but my pit bull (named Betty White) is scary looking so they keep their poop to themselves! I’ll never tell them that she’s harmless!

    Reply
  9. belladonna says

    March 27, 2020 at 9:33 pm

    I feel better because I wasn’t drinking and now I am! Boris and Charles test positive, do you think we would know if orangalini tested positive?

    Reply
    • Shari says

      March 27, 2020 at 10:33 pm

      I’m guessing he would at some point stop appearing at those “informative” press conferences. Questions to ponder are: what excuse would they use for his absence, would they tell us if he didn’t make it, would they decide to infect half the nation by having a state funeral and would there be rioting in the streets by his base claiming that it was a plot by the “Deep State?”

      Reply
      • Calipatti says

        March 28, 2020 at 4:34 pm

        I have never wished so much for someone just to be quiet,
        just stop talking. Just shut up.
        I mute tv or turn off.

        Reply
        • sliceo'pie says

          March 29, 2020 at 3:07 am

          Shh, don’t tell anyone but I think I have a crush on Ny Governor Andrew Cuomo. I look forward to his daily late morning daily press conferences. I start feeling anxious around 11:30, why isn’t he on yet? He hasn’t forgotten meeeee??
          His conferences run a minimum of an hour and I love every minute; he’s always blunt and honest, admits if he doesn’t know something, alternates between -angry,grateful pissed off & scolding – all within minutes…. sigh…he’s everything I love in a man.
          If he needed to borrow money he no intention of ever paying back, he’d be perfect

          Reply
  10. Judith Vance says

    March 27, 2020 at 10:37 pm

    the terracotta rose cosmos germinated, came up, got a leaf and keeled over dead, don’t know what went wrong. all the peppers each have a real leaf and i put them on the front porch today to get some good light. the amaryllis are in full bloom today; they refused to bloom at christmas. the first of the daffodils, scillas, and puskinias are just starting in the yard and the dandelions are lookin’ good!

    Reply
  11. BeetsWhy says

    March 27, 2020 at 10:57 pm

    I gave in tonight and cracked open the booze cabinet… to find it was mostly beer and liquors I’m not crazy about ? The really down side of living in Pennsylvania—our liquor stores are run by the state so they are separate from beer and wine; we have only recently begun to have beer and wine in *some* grocery stores.

    I’m having problems watching just about anything on television/movies in its entirety, I get half way through and I’m over it. This is new for me. I am happy that Ozark season three is out, maybe that will help?

    I did watch a great documentary on Netflix called CRIP CAMP about the struggle to get equal rights for the disabled. It hit home because growing up my brother’s best friend had Cerebral Palsy and my brother was juvenile diabetic. They were both born in ‘71 when the movement really took off. He was fortunate in that his parents were quite well off and could provide him with all the best of everything. I now realize why i heard so much talk about his parents bringing law suits against various stadiums and arenas, etc., it was all part of this journey.

    Reply
    • sliceo'pie says

      March 29, 2020 at 3:14 am

      I’m seemingly incapable of finishing ANYTHING I start and most things take great effort. I scroll from website to website looking for food or clothing and I can’t complete an order, I feel SO VERY indecisive. I’m sticking to one show at a time but I can’t concentrate and I only half watch the telly and play on my laptop at the same time.

      I just saw coming attractions for Crip Camp, it looks fantastic. I binged on Tiger Man last weekend. People in Florida are pretty messed up.

      Reply
      • tamaratattles says

        March 29, 2020 at 2:52 pm

        I just basically drink and sleep and feel like I should be working on the site and then don’t. I am lucky to have my same job and don’t want to “go to work” most days.

        Reply
  12. Erica says

    March 28, 2020 at 2:27 am

    I’m still alive, and what is more important, I’ve not committed parent-cide. Although came close tonight. Apparently moving back in with my parents means I’ve lost the ability to cook right, clean correctly, or be the one who knows shit. Oh, and when asked a question my answer is not right. UUUUGH.

    I know WHO says abstain from alcohol if you want to boost your immunity, but fuck. that. shit.

    I literally have hard alcohol hidden under my bed. If I drink from one of their bottles, and I think they might check the levels in the morning… I’m adding to their bottles from the ones under my bed. Unfortunately, my dad was looking at the tequila last night so I can’t do that for a while.

    I have Instacart orders in. I thought I could sneak alcohol orders into the Costco order – but my shitty state won’t let them deliver their alcohol! I wn’t go into a grocery right now. I’m literally bleaching all the packaging, etc. of our grocery deliveries. We have the Instacart people leave the stuff in the driveway on a designated spot. I glove, mask, and protective glass up and start cleaning. I literally dunked our canned and packaged frozen goods in bleach water. Yeah, I probably order too frequently, but I am trying to keep up the fresh veggies, etc. Lost a half a pound this week even with the alcohol and the fact that THERE ARE POTATO CHIPS.

    So Costco comes tomorrow. My mom doesn’t know it, but Total Wine and More comes Sunday. I’m hoping to sneak out and get it and wipe it all down. I’ll probably hide it in my car for now.

    Tomorrow I’m going to try to up my step count on my fitbit and I will scrub down all the bathrooms and handles, etc.

    I’m gonna be here for the long haul if Bill Gates is right, so where should I order seeds?

    Reply
    • IJC says

      March 28, 2020 at 9:03 am

      Was wondering where you were. Hang in there. Bless your heart and I don’t mean that in the condescending way. Just know that you aren’t alone in the homicicidal thoughts, lol. We’re all going crazy. This too shall pass.
      Although some are predicting a baby boom, I’m predicting divorce rates skyrocketing. Unfortunately we can’t divorce our family… or can we? ?
      Get your drink on, girl! Cheers! ?xo

      Reply
    • LA_in_KY says

      March 28, 2020 at 9:30 am

      I feel your pain! We had to move back in with my mom for awhile and we mostly got along but had problems when it came to the children. She somehow forgot I managed to raise a 5 year without her help and everything was fine. I had to remind her constantly she was the grandma and not the mom and it is my job to discipline. It lead to my son acting out and when we finally moved, his behavior improved greatly. Dont think I can do it again, knock on wood.

      Reply
      • IJC says

        March 28, 2020 at 10:00 am

        Yes, I did that one time when I had surgery and kids were little. Same shit.

        Speaking of the children, I now understand how some species are able to eat their young! Ughh.

        Reply
        • IJC says

          March 28, 2020 at 10:08 am

          To clarify, there’s only one of them that is on my last nerve. In case reading here, you know which one you are. Lol

          Reply
        • Calipatti says

          March 28, 2020 at 4:53 pm

          IJC lol welcome to motherhood.
          This too shall pass,
          don’t fire up the barbecue.
          Hugs

          Reply
    • Calipatti says

      March 28, 2020 at 4:39 pm

      Why sneak drink in public and offer your parents a drink.
      Restaurants here that served wine deliver wine in these special ziplock wine bags. Comes very chilled with a straw, heaven sent

      Reply
  13. belladonna says

    March 28, 2020 at 2:32 am

    I would like to know how people are able to successfully scatter wildflower seeds. I tried, but birds ate all the seeds. I have flower boxes, and the same happened. The same birds that gave me the miracle tomatoes will eat every seed I try to plant.

    Reply
    • Nanette says

      March 28, 2020 at 6:37 pm

      Cover large areas with that black netting they sell in garden shops. They can tell you what to use for supports — maybe connected to an existing fence, etc. You can use berry baskets for small plants, again fastened down so birds can’t overturn. We are OVERRUN with roof rats — living in the neighbors’ palm trees and ivy and NOW under our house. We can hear them scratching under our bathtub. Last year 5 of my tomato plants were covered with fruit. I only got three ripe tomatoes, the rats ate the rest before ripening.

      Reply
  14. Navymommy says

    March 28, 2020 at 5:31 am

    Today is lawn day if the grass is dry enough. I put down Scott’s triple action two weeks ago and it is working so I need to do some thatching but only the front for now. I ordered a new thatching rake that a grass guru on YouTube recommended. I will wait for that to do the rest. It is supposed to be easier on the back and hands and do a better job. Our new next door neighbor is head of the city’s landscaping dept and his grass and yard are pristine. Not a weed, crabgrass, edges on point. When we moved in, we introduced ourselves and promised to make the neglected yard shine. He and the DH are the same age with the same birthday. They have become besties. They are complete opposites in appearance. The nabe looks like and dresses like Ce-lo Green and the DH is a biker with a braid to his waist. The DH has glorious red sun-streaked hair that he grows for Wigs for Kids. The nabe usually shows up on Friday evening and asks if the DH can come out to play. He always carries a bottle of a little somethin-somethin and they do some front porch sittin’ in the rocking chairs. I love living in the city now precisely for this reason. Our street has beautiful old homes with well-kept lawns and kids playing outside. We have been very lucky here regarding Covid-19. We have only had 11 cases in 5 cities and they all came from travel overseas and out of state. I hope it stays that way but that is probably wishful thinking. I keep waiting for the garden centers to put their spring plants and soils on sale but they may not do that because of the virus. I am itching to get those porch rail boxes planted and beds mulched. The weather broke about three weeks ago but we have had a LOT of rain. Our next home improvements are to finish the half bath, install two ceiling fans on the porch and hang some cabinets in the butler’s pantry that for whatever reason were removed. Good luck all with your gardens and stay well.

    Reply
    • Nanette says

      March 28, 2020 at 7:40 am

      Your place sounds a little like Paradise. I wish I could see it. In California, nurseries are open and thriving. As people are staying at home more, and see it that way for a while, many are getting more into their gardens. In my neighborhood, people mix flowers and edibles and small orchards/vineyards in the FRONT yards and I love it.

      Reply
  15. T D says

    March 28, 2020 at 5:50 am

    When planning a urine garden put it next to a beer garden so it will be easier to plant pees.

    Reply
    • Nanette says

      March 28, 2020 at 7:41 am

      LOFL! And if you drink Loverboy (see Summer House), it would be organic pee!

      Reply
  16. IJC says

    March 28, 2020 at 9:05 am

    Has anyone heard from Laila?

    Reply
    • Laila says

      March 28, 2020 at 3:49 pm

      Oh hi! So thoughtful for thinking about me IJC. It cheered me up a bit, thank you! I think of so many of you here, even people that I never interacted with. I feel like I know you all so well.

      Love you all here so much <3

      Reply
  17. T D says

    March 28, 2020 at 12:33 pm

    Urine, i’m in, we’re all in the same canoe feeling like we’re up shit’s creek with no paddle and fixin’ to hit the rapids.

    Reply
  18. Laila says

    March 28, 2020 at 4:15 pm

    I just started watching Survivor 40 last night, but passed out. I haven’t watched TV in a week. It’s been a little hectic here. I will spare the details b’c it seems whenever someone complains about anything it causes panic, we don’t want any more panic!

    I see so many of you are having some cocktails. I wish I could drink. Drinking has the opposite effect on me, it makes me hyper. But to everyone who’s drinking…cheers!

    Reply
    • Kipper says

      March 28, 2020 at 4:36 pm

      Just nice to hear an update from you! Stay safe!

      Reply
      • Laila says

        March 28, 2020 at 4:50 pm

        You too Kipper! I think of you often taking care of your patients during this time. Much love and appreciation for you and everyone taking care of the elderly. This includes you, IJC who takes care of her parents at home. We will all get through this!

        Reply
  19. LA_in_KY says

    March 28, 2020 at 7:22 pm

    Y’all my older male cousin just trolled my mom (his aunt) for an anti Trump article she posted on Facebook. I sadly engaged with him, but mostly to say ” post your opposite opinions on your own profile page, back up off my momma and don’t be trolling your own aunt”. I know I should not engage with the Orange Army. And I actually really love this cousin, he is just pitiful. Wish me luck with ignoring this disaster!!

    Reply
    • LA_in_KY says

      March 28, 2020 at 8:12 pm

      Well, we both came to our senses and realized it is fucking stupid to fight online when everyone world wide is suffering.

      Reply
      • tamaratattles says

        March 29, 2020 at 5:10 pm

        I cannot wrap my brain around the fact that we have people in this country who support this fool. HE IS LITERALLY TRYING TO GET US ALL KILLED.

        Reply
  20. belladonna says

    March 29, 2020 at 12:37 am

    Thanks for the suggestions. Roof rats, a fellow Californian here, and no palms near my house, or any plants tall enough to let them get in.

    We did get some rain this year, so should be preparing more than I am. I should be at least doing the herb baskets.

    Reply
  21. T D says

    September 19, 2020 at 1:03 pm

    Dear Beets, since we both piss each other off this could be something we could work on together. For the record yes I would piss on you if you if you were on fire and hopefully you would do the same. Pees on earth, love to all.

    Reply

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