Is everyone ready for tonight’s Summer House recap? I have to be honest, I’m really pushing through for you guys tonight. It is nice to go back to a time when Corona was only a beer and social distancing was a choice by mom’s like me. We begin with Kyle’s mom and Amanda’s mom are coming to the Summer House for the weekend! Amanda and Kyle argue about wedding venues. Just what the moms want to hear. Carl and Lindsay drive up together in awkward silence. Ewe, Sarah is still talking to Carl after last week’s disastrous date?
She must really want to be on the show, eh? Luke asks Lindsay to not tell Hannah about Jelena. Say what now? Apparently, Lindsay met Luke for dinner in the city. He brought his “girl” Jelena. Who the fuck is Jelena? Why would he do this? I can’t. I just can’t. Amanda and Kyle have dinner with the moms. They discuss Amanda and Kyle’s issues. Kyle is really putting pressure on Amanda to quit her full time job. Amanda is terrified. She starts crying. Oh my God, make it stop! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD END IT ALREADY!
Mama Knows Best
At the other dinner, everyone catches up on their week. Lindsay recounts her awesome date in front of a peeved Carl. Hannah has everyone raise their hands if they’re single. Luke gives the half and half hand sign. Luke comes clean about Jelena. He admits he’s been seeing her for a few weeks. Hannah had been seeing Armand so he started seeing Jelena. Hannah is really hurt. Luke says they’ll talk later.
The next morning Luke asks Hannah to go for a ride on the bike with him. Paige hates him now. I just can’t feel anything right now. Kyle and his mom talk by the pool as Amanda talks to her mom in bed. Kyle fears that if Amanda can’t get out of bed before 9am, who’s going to get up with the kids? Kyle’s mom tells him that marriage doesn’t change a person. You marry who the person is. She wants him to be kind and loving towards Amanda if this is who he wants to spend the rest of his life with. Amanda’s mom is worried for her daughter. After some talk, Amanda admits that it’s just not working. She’s going to keep trying to make it work because she loves him.
American Psycho, Hamptons Edition
Jules whips out a pair of handcuffs to an appalled Lindsay, Hannah and Paige. Jules tells them a horrifying plan of choking and handcuffing him. The only time Jordan “finished” with Jules was when choking her. Holy shit. Patrick Bateman in real life. Terrifying. The mom’s leave as everyone else goes to the winery. Amanda asks what happened last night. Luke confesses to Amanda that he’s seeing Jelena. Hannah says that she and Luke should talk so they find a private spot. Hannah tells Luke straight out that she won’t be part of a love triangle. He is not to text her, call her or try to make out with her. That’s my girl! He tells her that he is where she was a few weeks ago with Armand.
They return to the table. Amanda takes Paige and Hannah aside to tell them what happened. Paige and Hannah are going to have a girl’s night. Carl takes a call from Sarah, which upsets Lindsay. He invites Sarah to the house the following weekend. In the bedroom, Jules presents Jordan with the handcuffs. He has a very aggressive reaction. He was pissed. So pissed that he gets up and walks out of the room. Jules is left embarrassed and confused.
Wasting More Tears On Carl
Jules convenes the girls, sans Lindsay, to tell them what happened. Jordan tells Kyle and Luke what happened as well. Paige tells Jules that Jordan told her that he isn’t attracted to her anymore. Jules confronts Jordan about what Paige said. Jordan says everything is fine. Jules tells him to take his shit and go. Meanwhile, Lindsay cries to Aunt Rhonda about Carl. Carl goes to check on Lindsay. He can’t comfort her so he leaves the room. Lindsay is beside herself. Kyle and Amanda stay home as well while everyone else heads out to have fun. The next morning Lindsay and Carl talk. Lindsay wants to go back to being friends but she’s having a hard time with it. Carl wants to get back to being friends as well. He tells her that Sarah is coming to the house. Lindsay seems better about it. They end the convo with a kiss and a hug.
Next week on Summer House: It’s Kyle’s birthday bash. Austen, Shep and Craig from Southern Charm arrive. Austen flirts with Hannah. Jules and Jordan blow up. Carl and Kyle kick someone out of the house. Thank you all for reading! And thank you to those who have DM’d and checked in. We’re doing okay here. It’s adjusting to a new normal. I truly hope you all are doing okay and staying home! See you in the comments!