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You are here: Home / Below Deck Sailing Yacht / Below Deck Sailing Yacht Recap: Ugatz To Be Kidding

Below Deck Sailing Yacht Recap: Ugatz To Be Kidding

March 10, 2020 by tamaratattles 17 Comments

I feel like it has been forever since I have seen this show. It’s kind of hard for me to do a Below Deck Sailing Yacht recap with so many shows airing right now. But I like this one and I am glad to have the time to recap it today. I was out in the world getting my head shrunk and getting stuff together to renew my passport. I am feeling the need to be ready to go. When we left off last week, Captain Glenn had left the docked vessel and headed on to shore for a bit. You would think it would be fine to do that while the crew was cleaning. You would be wrong. It was not properly tethered to the dock and it is banging into the dock with each wave that crashes. Someone’s head will roll for this. Probably, Paget’s but I already predict he will blame Parker. Parker is indeed a moron, but that is Paget’s responsibility to fix.

Madison is frustrated being in the middle of the drama between Georgia and Jenna. Jenna is of course in the galley throwing herself at Adam. Literally. Apparently she needed a hug before they start their usual shit talking about the stews. Production gives us one of those six shots of everyone working. I pause to see if Jenna is in the montage. Nope. She’d have to be doing something constructive for that to happen.

Siren Calls & Sad Stories

Captain Glenn calls for the preference sheet meeting and Jenna is seen emptying a trash can in one of the cabins. She must be exhausted! It’s a guys trip. The primary is from Long Island and I suspect some of the guests are from Jersey. As night falls, Ciara goes to bed. Georgia plays the guitar and sings on deck which is a siren call to Paget that he quickly answers. Most everyone heads to bed except for Madison and Byron who are chowing down on a very delicious looking cake.

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Byron makes small talk. Madison gets oddly prickly when he asks why she left Michigan after she graduated. Madison tells us in a tearful interview that her sister was driving through Detroit with her friends preparing to go out to the movies. When they were stopped and another car pulled in front of them. A couple guys got out and shot “AK-47s” and shot up the car all the people in the car were shot but her sister was the only one who died. I don’t think she told Byron the story.

Below Deck SailingThe THIRD Deck Hand Has Delusions of Intelligence

Parker, the third deck hand with no experience sure does seem to like to tell Paget, the lead deckhand with years of experience what to do. Parker asks Ciara to help him keep an eye on Parker. But, suggests she not be to bossy. Would he say that to a guy? Or even a girl who wasn’t his girlfriend. The “boys” arrive and I find them obnoxious before they even board the boat. Of course, Parker thinks they are fantastic. Birds of a douchey feather. They have multiple shots and tons of champagne before they even leave the dock. This is going to suuuuuck for the crew.

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The douche bags spot a bar on the shore and of course must go drink there. It’s empty except for an older retired couple whose peace is about to be destroyed. Or not. Upset by a lack of audience, the stooges attempt to hop into the boat. One misses entirely (because wasted) and falls into the ocean losing his drink.

Below Deck Sailing Yacht RecapUnder Sail

When the sails go up, the ones sober enough to notice do seem to appreciate the sails. The drunk ones unfortunate wake up do the the side to side movement of the boat. One starts demanding shrimp cocktail. When the hor d’oeuvres come out he skips right over the shrimp. These drunk morons could be in the closet of a frat house and it would not change the experience they are having at all. They are so blind drunk most of the time they don’t seem to know or care where they are.

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The guys want to go to a club. So Jenna selected a sleaze bag club that opens at midnight and stays open until four. Paget suggests Ciara in front of Captain Glenn and Jenna and no one seems to have a problem with this idea other than me. The guys are loving the food. I am surprised they have tastebuds. Parker the third stew goes to bed. Paget and Ciara take the guys to shore. Paget mentions to the guys that Ciara is his girlfriend. I’m over watching Jenna throw herself at Adam and Adam’s rejections. They guys are headed back and they are hungry. They want a lot of food, but Adam is in bed. While Ciara goes to pick up the drunks, Madison puts out an assortment of junk food. They drunks fall all over themselves getting out of the boat. Then they demand cheeseburgers. Madison offers to cook them grilled cheese.

Below Deck Sailing Yacht RecapPlease Put Me Down!

One of the charter guests decides to pick Madison up and use her as a weight to work out. She asked not to be picked up and then said “please put me down” several times. He ignored her and then when she walked off said, “don’t tell no one..” Another stupid meathead says, “what is she going to do, call the marine cops?” Oh it looks like that was douchebag PARKER who said that. Parker and Madison are supposed to be friends who flirt. All he was doing was bro-ing out on deck while everyone else worked. Madison doesn’t seem to know that Parker was all fine with what happened to her and so she goes to him for help. Madison is afraid to mention it to Jenna or the captain because she is worried it will effect the tip and they will all be mad at her. This infuriates me.

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The douchebags go to the bar and bring back a DJ and bunch of drunken women. Madison is the only one working the deck. She needs to go wake Jenna the fuck up. One of the girls comes up and says to Madison something like, ” I hate to tell you this but…” And my DVR shuts off. I already watched and deleted Spy Games so I have no idea what happened. Do you?

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Filed Under: Below Deck Sailing Yacht Tagged With: Adam Glick, Below Deck Sailing Yacht, Byron Hissey, Captain Glenn, Captain Glenn Shephard, Ciara Duggan, Georgia Grobler, Jenna MacGillivray, Madison Stalker, Paget Berry, Parker McBrown., Parsifal III

About tamaratattles

Come for the tea. Stay for the shade. Not for the easily offended. You're a special snowflake just like everyone else.

Comments

  1. JGauthier says

    March 10, 2020 at 8:08 pm

    Drunk girl throws up all over the deck and cushions . Parker is up with Madison and cleans it up . Madison makes random omelets to feed the beasts and it pretty much ends there . Parker did seem to be doing what he could to help her take care of all the drunk people .

    Reply
    • tamaratattles says

      March 10, 2020 at 10:38 pm

      Thanks. These charter guests are losers.

      Reply
  2. sp says

    March 10, 2020 at 8:22 pm

    One of the girls puked on the cushions and the deck.

    Reply
  3. BnCtrKiki says

    March 10, 2020 at 9:18 pm

    I want to believe Captain Glen would have told the dude bro who thinks he can do whatever he wants to a woman and then tell the woman to keep her mouth shut about it to get the fuck off the boat. I love Captain Glen, and I want him to be a good guy. Parker is an awful dude bro too. And it is so sad Madison cares more about not upsetting her colleagues than keeping herself safe. I am a 50 year old lady and just I just want to smack these jerks with my purse after I fill it with quarters.

    Reply
    • Nanette says

      March 11, 2020 at 1:04 am

      If you read the blurb about next week’s episode it sounds like you get your wish. I love Capt. Glenn!

      And the blurb for the following week — EXPLOSIVE! I can’t wait for that one! (I didn’t think I could dislike a chief stew more than Hannah. I was wrong.)

      Reply
      • sunshine528 says

        March 11, 2020 at 10:22 am

        Where are you reading the blurbs? I want to read toooo

        Reply
  4. Ingrid says

    March 10, 2020 at 9:38 pm

    These douchebags are the height of douchebaggery and abusers as well. They give New Yorkers a bad name. and next week you get to see the actual puke on the deck!

    Reply
  5. therealdeb says

    March 10, 2020 at 10:42 pm

    I’m not sure we have ever seen a more disgusting group of guys, they literally think that they are the shit. They aren’t, they are why we get called ugly Americans all the time. I prefer “hunter gatherer” type guys, and these guys aren’t it. I bet they were the bullies in high school who couldn’t understand why all the chicks weren’t dropping the panties for them. Gross. I at first thought Jenna was going to be a decent chief stew, nope. She sucks and does nothing and Adam really isn’t all that into her. He may want to play around low key like but she isn’t all that interested. Parker is an absolute moron, I cannot fathom why he thinks he knows more, is it because he supposedly has a dick swinging between his legs? I kind of wish these assholes would fall overboard, while very drunk. The world wouldn’t miss them.

    Reply
  6. LakeCarly says

    March 10, 2020 at 11:17 pm

    All season, every time we see Jenna, she is standing at the galley sink, carefully washing a glass or carefully drying a platter. Oh, once she was sitting at the dining table carefully wiping silverware. Is this editing or is she really that awful a manager? I think the latter. Nightmare charter guests. Just saw Parker and Georgia on WWHL. Stopped watching in the middle because he is an egotistical douche and she was so weird, looking down the whole time or giving annoyed looks to everyone. Madison was in the audience–she should’ve been in the interview seat.

    Reply
  7. Nanette says

    March 11, 2020 at 1:09 am

    Those fucking Neanderfucks are the epitome of what can go wrong when a kid grows up knowing there is a trust fund. They make Shep look like a prince.

    I’d rather clean up the Clamper puke and nonsense I used to have to deal with than deal with entitled Neanderfucks. They had better leave a HUGE-ASS tip.

    Reply
    • tamaratattles says

      March 11, 2020 at 2:40 am

      I doubt the tip well if at all. I do think Bravo requires a tip of some sort though.

      Reply
  8. Leslye says

    March 11, 2020 at 3:12 am

    Jenna is absolutely worthless. She seems to skip over the part about showing the stews how she wants things done. She is too busy in the kitchen flirting with Adam. It is disgusting. Say what you want about Kate (I like her most of the time), but she pitched in everywhere and wouldn’t think of leaving just one stew on late and alone with that bunch of cretins. Parker is a moron, but at least Madison wasn’t alone with them.
    I don’t think that we have seen Jenna leave the galley yet.
    Ciara was protesting too much when she was saying that she wasn’t jealous of Georgia paying attention to Paget. Just watch. Paget is going to do something that crosses a line with Georgia.

    Reply
  9. niamh says

    March 11, 2020 at 6:50 am

    The village they moored off is Barbati, I was there in 1996 (we bought our engagement ring in Corfu town, that’s how I remember). It was the smallest village I have ever seen, we had one bungalow on the beach, there was only five others!
    The owner came to meet us, gave us the usual details & handed us a torch.. there were no street lights & the nearest restaurant was a kilometre away… oh the good times.

    Hard to believe what’s happened to the place, that night time bar would be my worst nightmare! Love to you all, x

    Reply
  10. IJC says

    March 11, 2020 at 8:56 am

    Omg. I’m not even watching but the recap sounds like these guys are like the dickhands from the last Below Deck. It sounds like if Ashton is the charter guest! When you were describing the girl was taking them to the late night club I was thinking you were going to describe another Kate van ride from hell. Ugh.

    Reply
  11. Jill W says

    March 11, 2020 at 2:22 pm

    Ugh. These charter guests are like the obnoxious frat boys I so expertly avoided in college. The infant from the last charter was better behaved.

    I felt badly for Madison. I’m not sure what was more infuriating – the charter guest handling her the way he did (despite her clear and repeated requests to not be picked up) – or the fact that she felt she couldn’t mention this to anyone for fear of jeopardizing the tip and upsetting the crew.

    Reply
  12. tasha says

    March 12, 2020 at 11:59 pm

    Finally got to watch. I noticed the blonde guest asked Madison a couple times if she was ok. Is he used to trying to defuse the idiots BS!

    Reply
  13. Doug says

    April 9, 2020 at 4:56 pm

    So, what was The tip. The end got cut off on my DVR also

    Reply

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