BY: POPCULTUREKELLY
It may be mid February but who wants to get hot and drunk with a good old fashioned Summer House recap? Click here to get caught up with last week’s drunken escapades. The gang is still having a drunken ball at the pool party. Carl and Lindsay agree to go on a date. Carl is nervous because he doesn’t want to mess up his friendship. As the party winds down, Luke goes over to talk to Hannah. He wants to assess his chances with her. She may be dating Armand but Luke makes her vag tickle. Don’t read further Husby because: girl, same. Next. it’s Lindsay and Carl’s turn for some hot tubbing. They hug and make out. Kyle and Amanda are still miserable at her cousin’s wedding.
A Whole Lotta Nothing
Carl and Lindsay share a bed but they didn’t have sex. Allegedly. Jules comes in strong with the bacon again for breakfast. Lindsay, Paige, Danielle discuss Carl’s kissing abilities. Hannah is amazed that those three all hooked up with Carl. Speaking of Hannah, apparently Luke tried to kiss her and she SWERVED AWAY. Ummm….why? Why would you do that Hannah? Hannah was my favorite but that move has me….just kidding, she’ll always be my favorite! I’m sure she had reasons. Not good reasons, but reasons.
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Anywhoodle, the gang packs up and heads back to the city. Kyle is picking up Loverboy. He is looking for a salesman who is motivated and driven so he chooses Carl? Kyle continues to make horrific choices in life. Kyle is tired of Amanda doing nothing with Loverboy.
Cut to her shopping with Hannah for their 4th of July party. They all catch up on the past weekend. Most notably Amanda tells Hannah that her wedding plans are on hold and she is perfectly fine with that. Kyle is definitely not fine with that. They still are not having sex. I predict that it’s going to be on the finale episode that they call it quits. Y’all read it here first!
A Date With Goldfinger
Paige and Jules go for a mani/pedi. Paige gets a certain Single White Female vibe from our Jules. I think she’s just so eager to fit in that she tries too hard. Reign it in Jules and you’ll be fine. Aw, her father died when she was in high school. Mine did as well so I get it. She shuts down and has a hard time with emotions. No one can ever be mean to Jules, ever!
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Carl and Lindsay get ready for their date. When Carl picks her up it’s just super cringe. He arranged their date on the penthouse roof deck on the top of Lindsay’s building. Over shots, they play a game asking questions about each other that the other doesn’t know. It gets tricky when the question of settling down is asked. Carl talks a lot about being afraid of being in a relationship. Lindsay gets heated because she feels like it’s an excuse. Carl is offended that she could think he’s making excuses. Lindsay walks away and comes back a lot calmer. Carl apologizes. They toast over shots of Fireball so the date ends on a good note. That was a roller coaster no one wanted to be on.
PTSD From Too Much PDA
Everyone is back at the Hamptons. Danielle is growing more and more uncomfortable with Carl and Lindsay’s PDA. We all are, Danielle. In the car going to dinner, Lindsay gets pissed at Danielle for making comments about her and Carl. Get used to it Lindsay. Hannah tells us that Armand is coming to the house for the 4th of July party the next day. Amanda asks Carl and Lindsay if they are getting serious. Lindsay gets very defensive . They go out after dinner and party. Carl and Lindsay sleep in the same bed and seem to have sex.
No Sex In the Bickerson’s Room
Kyle and Amanda go to bed and definitely do not have sex. Amanda threatens to dick punch him if he doesn’t go to sleep. He would probably take the dick punch since it would mean that she A. touched him and B. did something other than roll over and sleep.
The next morning, Kyle and Amanda talk about their relationship. Amanda feels like Kyle has unrealistic expectations for her to change into who he wants her to be. She’s not going to magically transform into a super motivated, tidy woman just because he put a ring on it. Kyle feels that they have so many issues, intimacy at their age shouldn’t be one. Amanda doesn’t want to talk about it right before the party. She goes in the bathroom and cries. Kyle is left hanging, literally. Per usual.
Next week on Summer House: It’s the 4th of July bash! Kyle and Amanda fight. Armand meets Luke. Lindsay and Carl fight. What did y’all think of this episode? I have such anger from Below Deck and VanderPump Rules that this is truly a frothy delight. See y’all in the comments!
I thought that fight between Carl & Lindsay was so fake and badly done.
And it’s funny, but that top pic of Lindsay was one moment when I really thought it gave it away.
She acted like they had been engaged for 2 years and suddenly he had commitment issues.
I wonder if Kyle & Amanda is all fake too.
(It probably all is.)
Why wouldn’t Amanda just come out and say she doesn’t want to marry him any more?
I know this is an unpopular opinion, but Hannah kinda bugs me. Sometimes I like her a lot, but she just seems so overconfident all the time. And there is no need to say someone makes your vagina tingle. Ick.
agree about hannah… she is just too much at times. i prefer paige’s demeanor much more
I like to think that none of it is fake but you’re probably right 🙁 Awww I love Hannah! That comment was a bit much though ?
Ooh. I do not care for her!! She’s insanely plain and her “im so hot” act is transparent.
“A Date with Goldfinger” OMG too funny!!!
Carl is not ready for a relationship with Lindsay, she is too mature for him.
Remember how Amanda wanted to get engages do badly? I think it took too long for Kyle to actually commit and now that they moved in together and are living the everyday she has decided that’s not what she wants and wasn’t what she thought it would be. I know she came to WWHL with him a few weeks ago but I really hope she just breaks everything off with him.
I agree with you regarding Kyle and Amanda. Someone needs to rip the bandaid off. They need to go their separate ways.
Haha thanks! I agree. It all sounds great but the reality is that a ring doesn’t change things if they already aren’t good. I hope so too, they both just seem miserable together.
I don’t consider Lindsay mature at all – she’s just pathetic with her men over and over again – WTF – this was a first date – why they talking commitment? they should be talking about whether they should date or not – it could wreck the friendship
And on last night’s episode she was talking marriage- after a week – and making an ass out of herself. Don’t get me wrong Carl is an ahole – but so is Lindsay
Kyle was on WWHL a few weeks ago (or a couple of weeks) and Amanda was in the audience with her engagement ring still on her finger. They are still engage.
I wonder how many takes it took production to film the fake fight between Lindsay & Carl? I was so distracted by her hair & jewelry changing between each time the camera switched back to her face ?
Why is everyone so down on Carl and Lindsey hooking up? They actually seem like they would be a good couple and they are great friends. Some of the strongest relationships I know started that way. Carl already knows Lindsey is nuts and Lindsey already knows Carl has commitment issues. They have had one date and seem more suited for one another than Kyle and wet blanket Amanda.
Because, Carl. And we actually like Lindsey. So no.
PERFECT!
And can he please buy pants that aren’t too small for him?
Yes, what’s with the skin tight, white pant?
Haha! Perfect summation! Thank you
I love this s**t show! They are all so ridiculous and think of themselves as above the other Bravo franchises because they work in NYC and are “successful”. I wonder what their families think?
Isn’t it great??? It’s what VanderPump used to be. Haha I wonder that too because the families seem relatively “normal”.
I love this show too. If anything just so I can drool over Luke! He is smokin hot! I think I just want to hate on Hannah because he is flirting with her and I want to be her!! Ha!
Isn’t he???? And so far he isn’t as douchy as most hot guys are. Yet. Haha I want to be Hannah for a variety of reasons but her sick body and Luke being into her are top two!
Kelly, I have been extra thankful for your recaps so I don’t “have” to watch this shiteshow. But now you’re making it sound better than the other shows I USED to like — VPR, BD, RHBH. I may even tune in to On Demand!
You should! This show and the new Below Deck sailing show have been the breath of fresh air I needed! I officially quit watching all of the Housewives shows this year and almost gave up Bravo…then I discovered these 2 shows!!
Awwwe you’re welcome! I do hope you check it out because it’s fun. It’s very reminiscent of what VPR used to be. Let me know what you think of you end up watching it but I’m sooooo glad you’re reading the recap ❤️
I agree so much that this has been a welcome relief. I too have been triggered by BD and VPR. I’m thrilled that I no longer have to watch those Wirkus twins. They were my biggest nightmare. I’m praying the Carl Lindsay thing isn’t fake!!
Omg BD and VPR make me sooo angry! This is such a fun, light alternative that BD and VPR used to be. I know a lot of people think the Carl and Lindsay thing is fake but I’m not one of them. Maybe their fight was staged but I believe they are giving it a go in the relationship department. I like to believe that anyway lol
I’m just praying that we don’t have to hear about anyone getting “finger-blasted” ever again. Ugh!
Haha same!!
I think Amanda wanted to prove that Kyle loved her and had every intention of marrying her. I think she thought the ring would cure her hurt over him being a cheater and a crappy man-child drunk. She seems depressed to me and unsure how to get out. She’s too young and not ready. Her brain isn’t even fully formed yet! Someone needs to rescue her and get her a maid. Someone that young isn’t too tired … she’s sad and defeated!
I agree. Amanda just doesn’t seem happy with Kyle. I’ve never seen this borderline OCD side of him where he’s so controlling in their domestic life. Run Amanda!
What’s the deal with Carl getting all his mail delivered to the Summer House? Is he couch surfing again, because he doesn’t seem to be working outside of the show, except for what Kyle offered him. Maybe he has commitment issues with working too. I wish they’d get rid of this poseur.
Totally agree with you both. I don’t usually root for people to break up but this is one instance I do.
Hannah needs to write a book on how to get super hot guys to be into you… Luke this season, and that hot British guy last season… I would buy her book because Hannah is a total butter face who gets hot guys… It’s crazy
Awww I think that’s unfair. I think she’s pretty. She has a sick body and a funny personality…she’s a total catch. I don’t know that I’ll ever forgive her for not kissing Luke when she had the chance. She should have done it for all of us!!!
I agree, I think Hannah is the total package! She’s hot in a confident way. She wears little to no makeup, has a body that doesn’t quit, a sense of humor and can laugh at herself! No wonder the hot guys fall all over her (and around…) she’s “got it”.
Due to age disparities I could not even wish to attract such a fetching figure. I’m w/TT on hoping for a Meridith Baxter epiphany. There have been some trying days/years out here in heterosexual land and as I age I wonder…
Btw, I haven’t watched any of this season. Your recaps PCK are killer and I feel up to date. I’m completely planning on watching but I’ve been kinda busy of late so these episodes are piling up on the dvr.
Thank you TT for PopCultureKelly, she’s a gift!
Isn’t she? I think she’s so pretty in a fresh, natural way. Hahahah it took Meredith years to live her truth and be happy, if that’s your happiness then get it guuurl!! Awww thank you so much!!!! I’m so grateful to TY for allowing me and my rambles on her site. She’s the gift, as are everyone who reads this! ❤️❤️❤️❤️
No. She wears quite a bit. And she’s a huckabee eye.
No you didn’t with the Huckabee eye!! ? In my life before pop culture I was an optometric tech and optician. I can spot a huckabee eye and I don’t see it on her. Honestly I think she wears fake lashes and they fall down ? But I respect that you don’t find her attractive. She’s not Paige attractive but I do think she’s a pretty girl.
Hi all! I’m late to the Summer House party but I’m in now. Anyway, can someone please explain to me how Kyle and his fiancée can afford such a nice apartment in Manhattan? I get that they have show money but even still… I mean that place must be insanely expensive. All I’ve heard him talk about are past start up failures. I don’t get it, please help me understand! Also, if I hear fingered one more time I’m sending all of them back to grade school.
Fizzzzzz welcome!! That is a very good question. If I remember correctly from last years recap, it’s something like 7,000 a month? I may not remember correctly but it was exorbitant. I guess show money and he probably invests in actual successful companies ? Ugh seriously!! I am over that big time!!!
My biggest issue with Hannah is her unflattering bathing suits! She is so cute and such a cool chick with an amazing bod! Why the junior department bathing suits that look like something an 11 year old would wear!? She’s way too hot for those suits!
Hannah and Paige are the cutest and the absolute best on this show! They are so opposite and a great friendship fit, it seems like they would attract (and are attracted to) a different type of man so there’s no competition just a great girlfriend. We need more of those relationships on these shows! They are definitely #friendgoals