It’s time for another Vanderpump Rules recap! On tonight’s episode, basically nothing happens to Raquel for partying with James a Tom Tom rather than showing up for her shift at SUR on Pride! Kristen would have been tarred and feathered, set ablaze, fired, ridiculed and physically tossed out on the sidewalk. Tom Sandoval gets attacked by the Witches of WeHo, including new members Brittany Cartwright-Cauchi and Lala Kent because the officiant for the wedding of the year, is a homophobic, POS.
Ariana is back behind the bar in order to deal with her depression and desire not to leave the house. I am cured for now and was out of the house all day working out and getting cute for y’all. So raise your glasses high! Ariana is now an out and proud bisexual and Dayna has now jumped on the bandwagon to come out as bi. Um, most people are bi. The Kinsey scale of sexuality is a bell curve very few people being completely straight or completely gay. But, yay for these two middle of the bell curve girls!
Lately, I am trying to shorten up the blogs for readability by not including every little scene. So far all of these seem like filler. Except for the main storyline that is Britanny’s Kentucky pastor hates gays. This news is shocking and appalling to the WeHo crowd. I doubt it is shocking to Brittany or her family. Or the congregation of her church but I imagine she is going to pretend it is. Stassi, who is new BFFs with Brittany tells us that someone needs to explain the gravity of the situation to Jax and Brittany because neither of them are going to be invited to join Mensa any time soon. It’s true but I wonder if Jax and Brittany are smart enough to know that Stassi is calling them stupid.
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LVP can’t wait to be the one to tell Brittany she has to lose the pastor. Brittany is shocked! Shocked I tell you that her family friend has such hatred in his heart. She thinks he is a great person and a great family man. Brittany apparently called the pastor months ago and he said the things he posted on social media were not how he really feels. She said okeydokey then and that was it. But now it is a thing. Jax and Brittany are getting heat on social media.
LVP Has One Of Her Obligatory Scenes
Shockingly, LVP’s SUR scene this week is not with one of the hot male employees. Instead, it is with Raquel who decided not to show up to work on Pride day. Instead she went to TomTom to hang out with James. LVP tells her that she is a bad, bad girl and she is going to be written up.
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Later, Raquel tells James that it seems that LVP expects her to show up for her shifts and stuff at SUR. James tells us he needs her as a sober coach at drinking functions, basically so she may need to miss work. Also, Raquel is invited to Peter’s birthday party but James is not. Peter didn’t want to upset Jax. He is a groomsman and he takes the job very seriously and thus, cannot entertain Jax’s arch nemesis. Raquel says she is not going. Later James vents to the Toms about being disinvited. Sandoval is pissy that Jax and Brittany ignored the homophobic pastor as long as they did.
It’s Scheana Shay’s Worst Nightmare!
Down in the valley, Sandoval and Ariana talk about the pastor situation. Sandoval thinks that Jax and Brittany need to get on top of things with the wedding only two weeks away and find a replacement. Back in Weho, Max and Dayna hang out and Max tells her he wants an exclusive relationship with her. Ah, young love. I don’t believe him. They are not in an emotional relationship. They are just hooking up a lot and don’t need to be bothered looking for other sex partners. Until, you know, Max spots someone new. But whatever, this is going to pissed Scheana off and that makes me happy.
Princess Bridal Shower
It you are old enough to get married, you are too to have princess parties. I’m just saying. LVP is there. She never used to have this many scenes. Clearly, she misses the RHOBH camera. Stassi is thrilled with the quality of her princesses. What could possibly go wrong at a princess party? The best thing about this party is the Kristen is there. She sits outside alone with Katie briefly to make it clear that she is only tolerating her for Brittany’s sake. LVP is also there. Brittany announces that Lance Bass has agreed to officiate her wedding. In the castle. In Kentucky. Why is LVP so into Brittany? How does it benefit her?
Peter’s Birthday Party
I am irritated that Peter is sucking up to Jax of all people and didn’t invite James to his party. It’s apparently at some sort of batting cage. Scheana seems to think she can’t drink because she is freezing her eggs. I don’t think that is a thing.
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Dayna tells Katie that she and Max are exclusive now. Stassi likes Dayna because she hates Scheana. Meanwhile, Brittany is crying again. Now she is sad that social media is mocking her princess party. Sometimes good can come from social media. It can help shame idiots into realizing that they are idiots. This is one of those times. I don’t even feel bad that I think Brittany’s bawling is fun.
Sandoval Stirs The Pastor Pot
Sandoval talks to Jax and wonders why they waited so late to fire the homophobic pastor and why it took LVP talking to them and finding a replacement for them to make a change. Jax replies, “Lance Bass is my pastor.” This kid that Jax and Brittany want to have is coming from a really shallow gene pool. I’m just saying. Jax storms off and heads over where his future wife is crying over a princess party. I can’t believe I am typing this.
Jax is angry, and Brittany is crying. Sandoval doesn’t know a shitstorm is brewing so he walks right into it. There was literally no drama about this subject for the months it went on for before anyone decided to do anything. And now suddenly the over acting and the over the top emotions just don’t make any sense. This show needs a new story writer. That’s a position that seems to be in short supply at Bravo.
Lala is doing my least favorite thing by being offended on behalf of other people. It’s annoying. She is grabbing her throat and rocking back and forth and practically having a seizure. She needs more acting classes, Randall.
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Then poor, dear, dumb, Brittany just can’t take it anymore. Why do people attack her for hiring a homophobic pastor who is a great man and a family friend? Why??? Jax wants to know why people care who the pastor is at their wedding. Brittany says she only saw one comment about him. Really? I don’t follow either one of them and I’ve seen lots of discussion about the pastor on line.
How dare people make fun of her for having a bridal shower with a theme that most eleven year old girls would tell their mother they are to old for? Stassi gets in on the Sandoval push back. How dare he speak up for the LGBT community! Who does he think he is, John Snow? (Yeah, that makes no sense at all. Poor script.) WHY IS BRITTANY SO OPPRESSED BY THE WORLD DURING THE HAPPIEST TIME IN HER LIFE? Now she is mad!
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I love how Brittany came onto this show and played her little old me game until she had all the bitches lined up behind her to kiss her ass. Bravo, Kentucky. You got your princess party, your castle and your ring. Then, Jax says Sandoval is out of the wedding. Brittany says she is about to knock Sandoval out.
Next week: Jax threatens to take Sandoval out of his wedding. More inter restaurant fucking occurs as LVP tries to get as involved with it as possible.
I know a fair bit about DNA and recessive genes. But I don’t know if two dumb people can breed a smart offspring. Maybe 1 out of 6 could be of average IQ? Likely not. But none of them will need a job or an education because they will live off the profits of MamMaw’s Beer Cheese(food).
I am disappointed in Peter. I understand it’s not a popular stance, but I adore Sandoval and James Kennedy. Scheana is unsufferable.
I’ve never seen ppl as dumb as Jax and Brittany produce intellectually gifted children. I take that back, I have but there was a grandparent with a great mind on both sides. The child also spent a great deal of time with their grandparents so I guess it was a bit of nature and nurture. Who knows, that’s just a random ass story from my life. No beer cheese involved.
I too adore Sandoval and his STL reppin self and my heart goes out to James always. I just can’t hate James.
I thought the latest studies stated that IQ was passed on from the female line – that kid has no chance.
Does anyone else think that all Jax’s animosity towards Sandoval stems from his jealousy over Tom Tom. Schwartz is too laid back to be a threat for screen time, but Sandoval is getting attention asan “owner” so Jax is passive aggressively using his wedding, house is stuff etc as an opportunity for payback & to squeeze him out?
ARE YOU SAYING IT’S NOT ABOUT THE PASTOR? 🙂 I think that you are on to something there. He also bought his house first. And didn’t play along with Jax and Brittany that they didn’t know about the pastor until LVP pushed the issue. LVP didn’t want the homophobe on “her show.”
I also wonder if two people coming out as Bi on the show have anything to do with LVP trying to look more inclusive. Lots of people have questioned why the self proclaimed champion of LGBT community doesn’t show it on VPR.
Oof, I thought the princess party was a prank? It was serious? Girl, you’re in your 30s, you’re way too old for this. Come on…
Me too! I thought it was a joke
On behalf of everyone from KY, I have to say a big ole Fuck You Brittany. Shame on you for making the rest of us look stupid.
??????
Hilarious and I hope true, especially in this case!
“Sometimes good can come from social media. It can help shame idiots into realizing that they are idiots. This is one of those times.“
I would like to bring attention to an amazing Kentucky author Silas House. This is a person we should be looking at and reading about. His novels are amazing. If you are looking for a good book, buy anything he had written.
Thanks! I just added a couple of his books to my “want to read” list. Do you recommend any particular one? I added Clay’s Quilt and also The Coal Tattoo.
His latest novel is SouthernMost. It is awesome. About a preacher that realizes his whole belief system is wrong and he has a meltdown.
I cannot with brittany and lala’s screaming their heads off. Lala cannot act if her life depended on it.
her movie “the row” happened to show up on hulu while i was browsing and watched 5 minutes of it. omg AWFUL
peter has no back bone or any game.
Well duh! That’s the audition where she met and fucked Randall so it’s not like she was chosen as the star for her talent.
You mean it wasn’t her exception acting talent?!?!?!? 🙂
I am kind of tired of Sandoval and his righteous indignation about all things. I used to really like him and Ariana but it’s getting a little rough, I still like her most of the time but I feel like she is kind of a head case. First her vagina is shy, then she is doing the thang with Lala in the back seat and now she has come out S bi and gets bent about shit. Just stop. Jax and Britanny knew the pastors views and I think she thought they could ignore it away, umm nope. I’m not sure how much more of thee morons I can take.
This. Sandoval is on my last nerve this season and Ariana whines about everything.
Jax and Brittany have always been like this, it is nothing new. Why is everyone so surprised?
Either take James off the show or let him be full time, This is a bit ridiculous.
Does anyone else think that Ariana is giving off a Caroline Stanbury vibe in her talking heads? Her hair is the same, and with her lipo and fillers, she is Caroline’s doppleganger!
So we are supposed to believe that the friends all knew about this homophobic pastor for the last six months, but not one of them thought to question Jax or Brittany about him until two weeks before the wedding? Giant eye roll here!
The way James talks to Raquell is really hard to watch. He’s very emotionally abusive towards her. I don’t think it’s all editing either. He’s a mess and she needs to run the hell away as fast as possible.
My friend was told to either stop drinking or to drink very moderately, no more than one glass of wine or it’s equivalent per day while undergoing fertility treatment to freeze her eggs. It’s a very expensive process. You pay monthly for the egg storage, as well as the initial retrieval. It’s pretty smart for Scheana to do this while her eggs are young and healthy!
No we are supposed to believe that Jax and Brittany knew that HER pastor was a homophobic with radical, non-inclusive beliefs all along. Brittany admitted on camera that she basically asked him about his hateful social media and he denied he meant what he repeatedly said. So either he is lying, or SHE is lying. Pastors who hold those beliefs do not exactly hold them under a bushel in their sermons, especially ones who spew them on social media. So it seems personally reasonable that Sandoval would feel like the only reason that Brittany fired HER pastor is because of LVP, not because of her personal beliefs.
As for the drinking, I researched that and it seem that people stop drinking for a few weeks prior to their egg transfer date. Scheana has been shouting from the mountain tops for ages about her egg transfer. Some how people with eggs in their bodies undistrupted managed to get drunk on the very night of conception and their kids come out just fine.
The gaslighting was really egregious in the James-Raquel scene. First he’d trick her into agreeing to something he seemed to want, then he’d attack her for taking that position! In the space of like 90 seconds he did that several times.
It was horrible to watch what he was putting her through. I hope she leaves him soon.
Totally agree! Raquel deserves better. She is like a little bunny among wolves on Vanderpump Rules.
Their interaction is disturbing. I’d tune in for an episode if she would just grow a backbone and tell him off once and for all. She could do so much better.
When they were talking to Jax about the wedding song and said “Looks like We Made It” I thought they were talking about Barry Manilow! So disappointed they meant that played out Shania Twain song ☹️
I have a new drinking game… every time Ariana refers to her bisexuality in a desperate attempt to create a storyline for herself. I’ll be smashed by the 30 minute mark if this episode is any indicator.
And, Brittany, sweetie, I have to side with the trolls regarding the princess crap. The only thing worse would have been to hire Jojo with the bow bow.
I agree about Ariana, and I am TRYING to make her my new favorite person on the show. It’s increasingly hard to like any of the really. But her sudden desire to talk about her “bisexuality” as if it is some kind of big deal is ridiculous. As I said in the post more people than not have had some sort of same sex sexual encounter(s). There is a difference in that and beiing someone who has RELATIONSHIPS with members of both sexes in their lifetime. Lala eating her box doesn’t really make her worthy of a fucking parade in my opinion. Your opinion may vary. Also, what happened to her “shy vagina?” This seems like a reach for a storyline which again IN MY OPINION is a bit offensive to the Bs in the LGBT community.
Because like on all Reality Shows that have been around for a while, cast needs storylines and are reaching, reaching, reaching.
just a thought… could ariana be more comfortable with her ‘gina with the same sex because of her abusive ex-bf who constantly mentally abused her and as she says, made fun and nasty comments about her ‘gina?
I just had a thought about her vag shyness. Stay with me here… I watched the goop episode on Netflix where gwyneth and her girls discuss vag vs vulva and then show pics of said vulvas. NOT pretty. It suddenly made sense to me why I’ve received compliments on mine. Seriously and for real. Soooo maybe Ariana’s looks more like one of the goop girls???
possibly. i just don’t think she would use hating her vag for a storyline but that’s probably because i like her. she seems the most level headed, strong, practical, non judgemental and intelligent of all the cast. jax and brittany being the dullest knives and stassi, lala and katie being on their high horse 24/7
I totally agree!
Silas House, silas house Silas House. Y’all, check out Slias House.
Silas House. Southern Most. A parchment of leaves.
Google Silas House. His books are amazing. Southernmost is his latest novel and it is great. So good.
I too love Sandoval & Ariana. I love the way they don’t go into debt to purchase cookie cutter furniture- yes, they bought an affordable valley house -doing it first by the way – but they are determined to save & buy furniture of their own choice. I get Stassi can probably afford to buy in a better area & a more unique home with her monetised podcast & book . But I am pretty sure Tom & Ariana have the biggest equity in their home & I hope their book sells well enough for them to purchase quality pieces that reflect their style.
I also love Scheana – not just because she served me at Villa Blanca in the January just before the show aired & I thought she was very beautiful & sweet & a good server! – but because her deluded self confidence & self absorption is so entertaining. I also don’t think she is as much of a bitch as the others (Besides Ariana – but I like poor old Kristen who is one too) and she stands up to Stassi & doesn’t let her crush her spirit indefinitely.
I like Schena too it’s sad that Stassi still gets off on talking negatively about her. Like ma’am please grow tf up. Secondly I don’t like Katie she’s a horrible person.
Yes, Katie has become truly AWFUL. I still somehow like Stassi, and especially her relationship with Beau. She seems more real with him. But they both should lay off on Kristen! She is supposedly their best friend of more than 10 years. Help her!
And Scheana- she cannot fight back like Stassi and Katie do.
I too like Sandoval and Ariana. They seem to be in a more adult relationship than the rest. As for Scheana, she tries so hard to fit in, and never seems to. I think she is one who should be off reality TV. It is not good for her esteem and mental health. She’d be better for it. Money and fame are not everything.
I just want to know when did Peter turn into a butch lesbian???
I think my two favorite people on the show are Ariana and Sandoval..the rest are just lame assholes, well Scheanna is so delusional, that you cannot help but like her.
Yes, what happened to Peter? He was so handsome and seemed removed from the day-to-day little kid antics. Has he caved? I hope not.
I’ve turned against both Sandoval and Ariana…especially Sandoval. So they knew for months about this pastor but waited until two weeks before the wedding to make a huge deal out of it??? And it’s purely coincidence that they waited until they could make a big deal out of it ON CAMERA while PumpRules is filming. How convenient.
Tom and Ariana are no different than LVP using the LGBTQ+ community to further their careers.
Oh, and two girls drunkenly making out in a bar doesn’t make them “bi” or “queer”.
End of rant.
“Oh, and two girls drunkenly making out in a bar doesn’t make them “bi” or “queer”.”Thank you I had not read your comment when I made a similar post. Pride celebrations are in response to all the hatred and abuse towards people who were not “hetero norms” Girls making out in bars garners hoops and hollers and applause from men not ridicule. It’s totally not the response that two butch dykes in a bar receive. The parade is not FOR YOU, Ariana. Have a seat.
I am over Sandoval and Ariana. They are both self righteous little twerps. Who made them the Judge and why does everyone have to answer to them? Get the hell outta here.
Except for the pesky little facts that they were right. Brittany only changed out the pastor because LVP gave her a talking too. I wish they would have shown that instead of the staged LVP/Raquel scene.
I completely agree w/your statement about 2 girls drunkenly making out.
And of course Sandoval waited to bring it up w/Jax when they were on camera. But I don’t think Sandoval was the one making a big deal out of it. He tried to have a conversation w/Jax and Jax and Brittany completely blew up. I think Brittany was really upset about people making fun of her bridal shower and took it out on Sandoval. They didn’t act that way when Lisa brought it up to them. Can’t believe LaLa and Stassi joined in. Oh wait, yes I can. Stassi is still pissed at Sandoval over her book party. LaLa gets on my nerves w/her “holier than thou” attitude.
I completely agree w/your statement on 2 girls drunkenly making out.
And of course Sandoval waited until they were on camera to ask Jax about the pastor. But I don’t think Sandoval made a big deal out of it, he just asked a question and was trying to have a conversation about it. Jax and Brittany completely blew it out of proportion. I think Brittany was really upset over people making fun of her bridal shower and took it out on Sandoval. For her to scream the way she did and then telling Jax to beat up Sandoval while punching her hand w/her fist and saying she would beat him up?! Unreal. How come Brittany and Jax didn’t get upset when Lisa questioned them about the pastor?
And I can’t believe LaLa and Stassi joined in. Oh wait, yes I can. Stassi is a grudge holder and vindictive and is still pissed at Sandoval about her book party. And LaLa gets on my nerves w/her “holier than thou” attitude.
I like James, but watching his conversation w/Raquel in their apartment was really disturbing.
Peter is a little bitch. “I take being a groomsman very seriously!” Boy, just go.
I just don’t understand this whole Raquel thing. She seems as dumb as a box of rocks. Why in the hell (other than to be on the show more) would she want to work at a restaurant where her boyfriend was fired from? And why would LVP even hire her? I am about done with the show. Way too many horrible people.
also, stassi’s the jon snow martyr analogy was stupid and made no sense. that show was a big disappointment at the end and it’s been over for a while, stop it with your wanna be khaleesi alter ego.. yes you and her are both nuts.
stasdi and beau are super dehydrated. someone give them some dried up paint to drink.
jax and brittany’s highlight was their wedding and everything else is going to be a shit show, if you are already having so many petty issues before the wedding, what more when the dust settles? dumb and dumber
I have a soft spot in my heart for James but Raquel needs to move on. James has been manipulated by his family for years, especially that horrible mother of his. His treatment of Raquel is a learned behavior and I don’t think he has it in him to change. Right now it’s just verbal abuse, but it’s a few short steps from verbal to physical abuse and I don’t want to think about that happening to Raquel. Jax and Brit became groomzilla and bridezilla as soon as they got engaged. I think everyone was afraid to bring up the situation with the pastor until they knew that Jax & Brit had done something about it. Looks like everyone was right to avoid it based on the reaction they got for just mentioning it. The princess shower was childish but it matches Brit’s immature behavior so I guess it worked for her. I also hate when everyone jumps into an argument to defend someone who really shouldn’t be defended. Lala, Stassi & Kristen should have just shut up and minded their own business.
So did we all forget about a few years ago when Brittney’s mom had an issue with the rumors about Jax having a gay relationship in Miami with that older dude? Her reaction then was bordering on homophobic so I am hard pressed to believe that neither Jax or Brittney did not know the pastors beliefs. Even in this episode, Brittney’s mom looked distraught when Brittney told her she had a new pastor to marry them. Brittney and Jax were definitely lying!
I think Brittany’s mother is more concerned about her daughter not getting married than the pastor officiating. If she doesn’t marry Jax she will be back on the farm working at Hooters!
I’m glad you mentioned that. I remember it and you are too kind with “bordering” on homophobic.
Yes Lee, Brittany’s family’s homophobia has been shown on the show more than once. This was not surprising news and Brittany’s mom was clearly irked that their pastor was replaced. AND WITH A GAY MAN! LOL She must have hated that. However, she loves a celebrity so maybe not.
You’re so right, Lee!
I watched the season one episodes recently, and I just dont see why anyone is on Stassi’s side ever? She and Katie are such mean girls. Kristen I feel got Jaxed that first season. I really dont like any of them much anymore, there is no growth, just new targets of their pettiness. Lala lost me the last few seasons. The new one are awful….. Bravo needs to let the show go!!!
Glad another Bravo show can be deleted off my DVR,
TT, I read that the new girl on Shahs is from the Peoples couch? do you know?
Case if anyone would know, it would be you!
Not the new girl, I don’t think but Destiney was on People’s Coach. She’s been on Shahs for a couple seasons. I believe it was discussed in the comment section for Shahs. 🙂
Destiney joined Shahs last year was on the People’s Couch. She appeared with her married sister Cathy.
It cracks me up that LVP is taking up so much space on the screen now. She’s missing that RHOBH exposure!
Thirsty little lady, LOL
I don’t know when TT figured out Brittney’s game, but it was before I did. Between her wannabe starfucker Mama and her Hooter Girl self, they saw the stairway to fame whore heaven riding Jax’s wiener. She’s gone from Pageant Princess to Kentucky Muffin to her real persona — Louisville Slugger. That stuff she was saying about beating Sandoval was despicable. You don’t TURN that way overnight. It’s all a lie. She is a mean woman with a mid-two-digit IQ.
Her sister does not have custody of either of two kids. And has not had custody of them for Years. What does say about them? Please.
Whose sister doesn’t have custody of her two kids?
Sorry, I am being really petty but Brittany’s sister is who I was referring to. It ain’t all sunshine and rainbows back home where she is from.
If and when Jax and Brittany have kids, you know they’ll be named after Disney princesses and princes. Or shots. Can you imagine? “Aurora Kamikaze Cauchi, you get off of daddy’s Cruzin Cooler this instant!”
Princess Tequila Sunrise Cauchi…
Yes! Please let there be twins! Aurora Kamikaze and Tequila Sunrise.
These name comments made my day. Thanks for the laugh!