It’s the last Married To Medicine recap of the year! It’s a back to back reunion so pack a lunch y’all! To start, our ladies look gorgeous. Most of them anyway. Contessa’s eyelashes look like they’re going to spin a web and trap us at any second. Even with tarantula lashes I find these women to be the most beautiful on Bravo. The reunion starts with a montage of Living Single, Quad edition. As my son would say, Quad is single and ready for a pringle. Cecil and Simone still hang out with Dr. G, which doesn’t seem to bother Quad. Andy says he got a lot of feedback about Simone and Quad’s dinner from hell. Quad apologizes for being dismissive and nasty to Simone. Hopefully they can move on from here.
Pull Out Method-Man
Next we get a montage of all the kids. Contessa stands behind her lavish birthday parties for the kids. Heavenly’s oldest son’s are dating. Her daughter Aluara is just a gem. We segue into Contessa’s feelings about Toya. Contessa has been open about her dislike for Toya and her financial decisions. We get a package of the housewarming party and Toya’s miscarriage. Everyone agrees that Toya has a gorgeous house. Toya and Eugene, a doctor, use the pull out method to not get pregnant. Let that sink in.
Heavenly’s shady comment about Toya and Eugene’s house not being an “accomplishment” is brought up. Andy calls out Heavenly for building a three story closet after Toya had her two story closet built. Heavenly gets defensive but all signs point to Heavenly being jealous of Toya’s house and closet. Heavenly then says that Toya doesn’t own her clothes. She “begged, borrowed and stole” to get that house. Toya’s eye roll and calm demeanor say otherwise.
Buffie The Reunion Slayer
Buffie joins the ladies. She looks vampy and amazing. I would totally dip in the lady pond with her. We get a clip package of the women and their sexual talks. We get a lot of talk about vaginas and sex. Jackie wants us to buy her book to learn more. Heavenly gets called out for not telling Daddy about the sip and paint. Heavenly gets very defensive. Damon is watching from the green room…he doesn’t look pleased. Eugene says that you can tell when Heavenly lies because she starts her sentences with “listen”. She says “listen” a lot. The ladies say that Damon got revenge at the strip club so they are even.
We get a montage of Buffie’s introduction to the season. Buffie cries as the infertile part is shown. We get a montage of Jackie’s apologies to Buffie. Andy asks why Buffie couldn’t accept Jackie’s apology. When she tried to explain that the apology in Cabo was insincere, Heavenly ramps up. She starts yelling at Buffie saying that Jackie is not malicious. Buffie tells Heavenly to calm down and stop lying through her dentures.
Heavenly says that Buffie should stop lying through her fat ass.
Andy is appalled that Heavenly called her Buffie fat. Heavenly tries to play dumb by asking if she did call her fat. Production shows that 17 seconds prior, she sure did. Kari Wells tweeted (our Kari!) and wants to know Jackie’s reasons for calling out Buffie for being infertile. Jackie addresses Buffie with a deeply sincere apology. So sincere that I had tears. She says that she prays for Buffie and wants nothing more than for Buffie to have the baby she so deeply desires. Buffie accepts her apology. She announces that she and David hired a surrogate! Her dream of having a baby will soon be a reality. At the break, Jackie and Buffie are talking. Jackie reiterates how sorry she is. They hug it out again. Heavenly, always right by Jackie’s side, asks Buffie for a hug too. Buffie says no! Lol. Oh Heavenly.
Part 2 Begins. Buckle Up, Buttercup!
Jackie’s issues with all the ladies is our next clip package. So is Simone and Heavenly’s argument. However, Simone and Jackie’s friendship becomes the sole focus. Simone and Jackie are not in a good place. Simone is really upset that Jackie is still close with Heavenly after all the stuff Heavenly has said about Cecil. Andy points out to Jackie several times that she is not getting how truly hurt Simone is. Heavenly gets upset and starts yelling over everyone. Andy is getting really frustrated. Heavenly is sitting directly to his right. He’s getting all that screaming up close and personal. Jackie asks Heavenly to stop talking, which Heavenly does. Simone says that she and Jackie can’t be close right now. She feels like it’s a betrayal that Jackie is still so close to Heavenly.
Simone cries. She is so hurt at the state of their friendship. Simone says that outside the show they are very close. They study, they spend time together, they have a deep friendship. Simone says that when they signed up to do the show, they made a pact that it will never interfere with their friendship. Welp, it has. After a lot of back and forth, Jackie and Simone hug it out. They are too good of friends to let anything, even Heavenly, come between them. Jackie says that she would leave the show before letting go of her friendship with Simone. You can see the relief on Simone’s face after they hug. I’m so glad they’re back to being besties again.
A Trip To Lake Hatred
Oh Lord, now it’s time for Mariah and Quad. This is such deep hatred I just can’t. Quad is adamant that she saw Mariah do cocaine. None of the other ladies have seen Mariah do drugs. There is a LOT of back and forth between the two. Lisa Nicole (THAT Lisa Nicole of seasons past!) tweeted about karma coming for Quad after Quad was all about taking down Lisa Nicole and her marriage. Quad insists that she never came for Lisa Nicole or her marriage.
Quad finally says that she will take a polygraph and challenges Mariah to take one. After more and more back and forth, Andy asks the other ladies what they believe. Do they believe Mariah did drugs? All say no. Do they believe Quad slept with Lake’s husband? All say no. Jesus, this is some nasty stuff.
Sippin’ And Strippin Ain’t Easy
It’s time for our favorite: the husbands! Their set is from a men’s closet. Andy asks Cecil for an update on Dr. G. Cecil says that Greg is doing well. He talks about Quad all the time, much to the dismay of his new girlfriend. Quad, watching from the green room, breaks down. The ladies take turns hugging her. I can’t imagine how painful the divorce was for each of them. I do believe they truly loved each other at one time.
We get a montage of the guy’s friendships and their strip club adventure. Daddy isn’t sure why the strippers targeted him. Heavenly is watching from the green room…I’m scared for Daddy. She really, really didn’t like that strip club trip. Andy asks if Daddy would have enjoyed it more without the cameras there! Shady Andy. He says he wouldn’t. Daddy says he’s a quiet guy who doesn’t like attention. He didn’t like the women all over him.
They revisit the sip and paint. The men were upset with Eugene because he didn’t tell the guys there would be a naked men there. Daddy had trouble watching the footage. Contessa had called Eugene a big ass bitch previously. The guys all laugh about it. Cecil says that he’s a “Mitch”, whatever that means.
In the green room, the ladies are watching the men. Heavenly says that Cecil should own up to being a bitch. Simone says that she won’t allow Heavenly to call her husband a bitch. Simone says it’s going to be a drag show now as she will drag Damon. Heavenly challenges Simone to tell her what she’s lying about when it comes to Cecil. Simone snaps back that Cecil has been out drunk with Damon, implying that Damon isn’t the sweet Daddy we know and love. Heavenly has to be taken out of the room, screaming! Daaaammn! Whoever isn’t watching this show, you’re truly missing out!
Next week on the third Married to Medicine recap: The couples are out on the stage together. Heavenly disses Quad’s marriage. Simone says she’s going to drag Damon for filth because his wife is so low down and dirty. Can’t wait for next week! Sending you all love and good health wishes for the new year. See you in the comments!