In preparation for tonight’s Below Deck recap, I did something I never do. I went back and read last weeks recap. I had to fight the need to go back and fix all the typos. Argh. With Abbi gone, tonight we return to the original redheaded female deck hand, Rhylee, to take the brunt of the shit. Um, YAY? At least Rhylee kind of antagonizes everyone so I don’t feel quite as bad for her as I did for Abbi. Most of my sympathy goes to Simone this week who is mercilessly sexually harassed by the obnoxious FSU alumni. Apparently, the #metoo message has not made it to Tallahassee.
It’s Pirate Day for the developmentally delayed morons. I will be so happy to see them leave. I can’t imagine how the crew feels. Why did these people came all the way to Thailand to do jello shots and be obnoxious? There are all sorts of places in Tallahassee to do that. Believe me, I did plenty of that there when I was in my twenties. On of the female guests is half-naked and mercilessly flirting with Ashton. He doesn’t seem to mind. Simone on the other hand, seems afraid of the primary. It’s very cringy.
The second Rhylee sees Brian, she is smitten. Ashton does his best to make Rhylee feel like a part of the team. Simone struggles to make ice coffee. Surely this is storyline, right? The pervert loves Rhylee who carries him like the child he is to a lounge chair. The children have a drunken food and drink fight at lunch while shouting “blumpkin!” Whatever you do, do NOT Google blumpkin. You do not want to know. After Kate witnesses the drunk pervert of a primary, Kate sends Simone down to do laundry to keep her safe.
Ashton takes the scuzz buckets on a sunset cruise. One of the drunken females throws herself at Ashton the entire time. He doesn’t seem to mind. By the time they get back, Brian is back on deck. Rhylee gets first off so she can adjust to the new time zones. Tanner lets Rhylee know that he is into Simone. Captain Lee joins the fools for dinner.
ARRRRGH! Chef Kevin Oversteps His Boundaries
Kevin wants to serve the meat with the help of the deckhands of for the stews to serve the veggies onto their plates at the table. It’s an extremely awkward service plan and Kate knows it. But for some reason she just goes along with it. How much longer can calm, cool and collected Kate last? I predict…not very much longer. I there it is. She finally tells Kevin that he made her feel like shit and that he took over her duties. But she still did it as this sort of calm version of herself. Captain Lee bailed on dinner the second it was over. Because, drunken morons. Kate says she doesn’t want either of the up along with the primary tomorrow. There will be two stews at all times.
The next morning, the drunkass primary goes up on the bridge to annoy the captain. This may not end well. Then he goes to ask Kevin for stir fried chicken rice. He has made a full breakfast with freshly made muffins. Meanwhile, Brian’s leg is a lot worse. Why have they not gotten him a doctor??? Why are they waiting until they dock? There are doctors who get on boats and come out to the yacht! At the dock they have the guy who can’t walk on his leg go upstairs to be seen by a doctor in the master suite.
Surprise, surprise, it’s an infection as we have been saying for the last two or three episodes. This is news to Captain Lee. The doctor shoots him up with antibiotics. Presuming they are the right antibiotics for the infection he should be much better in a day or two.
In other shocking news the dicks left a crap tip. Well, it was $15K, which doesn’t seem like a small tip to me but the crew isn’t pleased. They still get over a grand for two days work on top of their Bravo checks.
As high as the ratings are for this show, they only gave us two short previews for this and none were from the crew’s shore leave. For reasons that are unclear, Kate asks Kevin to order the food. When Rhylee says she’d like some sort of Paleo option that seems to upset Kevin’s apple cart. There are lost of Paleo options at Thai restaurants. Thai chicken and broccoli, beef and broccoli… all sorts of things. Anything that is meat and vegetables as far as I understand it. But Kevin is being a prick about it. Once again, I’m Team Rhylee, your mileage may vary.
This the end of the world for the guys. Kevin stomps off to the beach and tells someone (Tanner) that Rhylee needs to eat a dick. Well, if dick was on the menu, Rhylee would have appreciated it if you ordered it. Because, Paleo. Am I the only one that is on Rhylee’s side here? Yes! Simone is thrilled that Rhylee is standing up to Kevin. I like Kevin and Rhylee but Kevin is being a prick. Even Kate is on Rhylee’s side. Then Ashton is a drunken prick to Rhylee.
Next week, Tanner and Simone hook up. Six older women come in and become fixated on Captain Lee. Simone continues to disappoint Kate. Brian’s infection is not improving and goes to the doctor onshore.