Oh yay! It’s time for one last RHOP recap. While I have come to really like this franchise, I despise these reunions. For the love of God, can we just get off the topic of Michael Darby’s sexuality? NOE. NOE WE CAN NOT APPARENTLY.
First, we talk about everyone sex lives. Why? Why is this a topic? I don’t understand. And now we are going straight to the butt grab. Really? These bitches seem to be enjoying the gossip. On WWHL a few weeks ago, Andy Cohen had to make a legal statement that the unseen footage with Michael and the cameraman was NOT the cameraman in question. Yet they are showing it again on the reunion? Ah, he clarifies on the reunion that the second video it was unclear who Michael was talking to when he denied the butt touching. Andy apologizes to Michael and asks if he wants to clarify who he was talking to in the second clip.
The Butt Grab Heard Around The World
Michael starts off telling all of the ladies they should be ashamed of themselves for constantly keeping the situation going. The “I didn’t touch your butt” comment was made to Monique’s cousin, Hank. Monique says Hank was so drunk he doesn’t remember any of it. Michael says that he did NOT “grope Andrew’s butt” three years ago. He tapped him on the butt. They were friends. Guys do this all the time. Everyone starts laughing. It’s true. You see it in sports, you see it on Big Brother, Survivor and other reality shows. It’s something males do! Moniques husband Chris says only on the game field.
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Michael points out he is from Australia. Andy says that is one of the reasons he loves Australia, it is fun down under. Michael points out the US has lost a lot of it’s fun.
More Butt Grabbing, Because..?
I wish Katie Rost was here. She would have provided enough crazy where we wouldn’t have to have this nonsense take up the entire hour. Chris seems to get REALLY heated about this situation because for some reason he was questioned by HR about it.
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Then Andy says the ladies claim that Michael has displayed this sort of behavior every season. Gizelle says she saw Micheal grab Andrew’s butt three seasons ago. Production shows footage that seems to confirm what Gizelle is saying. Michael denies it was a grab. It was a pat. The footage is unclear on that. We just see a hand but the butt is blocked by Micheal’s body. Robyn says that production says the same night of the Andrew situation, other members of production claim he was grabbing their butts too. Karen is very into convicting Michael in RHOP Reunion court.
I’d Suck That Sausage!
I forgot about the whole “I’d suck his dick” AKA “I’d suck his sausage” stuff. So now we have to get through that. Michael says Robyn was so drunk she could hardly stand. There is no way she has any memory of that night. He says he wasn’t anywhere near Candiace that night. He says he should have filed charges against Candiace for pulling a (butter) knife on his wife. Candiace’s defense is that Ashley was in her home and she was trespassing. Girl, please. All the other ladies crack up as Andy explains Ashley was in fact not trespassing.
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When Andy asks Juan, the owner of the sausage his opinion, he doesn’t want to talk about it. Thank you, Juan. We are sick and tired of hearing about it. So instead, Andy questions Michael about his sexuality. Michael puts Andy in his place quick and in a hurry saying that is not anyone’s business nor it is relevant. Candiace keeps trying to get face time by coming for Michael. Michael says he has no interest in Candiace and doesn’t care about anything she had to say. Because she is a non-motherfucking factor. (That last part was me, not Michael.)
The Ladies Feel Michael Owes Ashley An Apology
The ladies feel Michael owes Ashley an apology. Both Michael and Ashley disagree. I feel like the ladies owe Ashley an apology for making a bad situation worse. And they are continuing to do it on the reunion!
Sidenote: At the 32 minute mark there was a new RHOA preview. Not this one. I can’t wait!
Back on the RHOP reunion, there is a lot of screaming. Then Juan calls a ceasefire! Thank you Juan. Juan says that he has to pee and walks off. Then the screaming resumes. Why would anyone feel like they should tell a husband what he should say to his wife in this situation. Or presume that they had not had private conversations about the situation.
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When Andy asks if anyone feels bad for how THEY treated Ashley, Candiace shocking says she should have texted her privately. Ashley says that instead, Candiace started rumors that Michael paid the guy off. Karen says she was in “a bubble of grief” and that is why she didn’t treat Ashley better. No one holds her accountable for Michael’s behavior.
What Does Everyone Think Now?
After seeing the clips and hearing out Michael, Gizelle feels less sure of the cameraman butt grab but is irritated that Michael is coming for her over the Andrew butt grab from three years ago. Micheal says it was a pay, Gizelle says it was a grab, and I still just don’t care.
Chris has not said a word about the topic. When Andy asks, he says he doesn’t know what to believe. Andy asks Michael if this is a cultural thing. Michael says he thinks it is this country is currently very uptight about touching. It’s not so in Australia (or tons of other countries btw). Michael says that no one on the cast reached out to him to see how he was doing. Gizelle and Robyn both seemed shocked that he would expect that. Why? Chris says he has called Michael before in another circumstance. Ray says he didn’t call him because he believed he was guilty. Ray says he had witnessed similar behavior from Michael in a different situation.
I. AM. SO. TIRED. OF. THIS.
Ray says that Michael grabbed Andy’s butt before at a previous reunion. They were kidding around so it wasn’t a big deal. Andy doesn’t remember this. Andy says he is sure he was fine with it. Michael ends with talking about how tremendous Ashley has been in the process. The men are sent away.
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Then we get a lot of interesting scenes from backstage. Michael and Gizelle have a strange interaction that I didn’t quite understand. Michael has production take off his mike. Chris and Michael are leaving together to go to the bar. Chris invites the rest of the guys.
Then more rehashing by the women. Please God, make it stop. Karen is such a cunt to Ashley that Ashley has to point out that when the cheating rumors about Karen and her blue-eyed driver were going around, she didn’t go there and jump on all the rumors. She asks Karen for the same respect. But that hit dog is HOWLING.
During the rose and thorn ending, Monique cries about the breakup of her friendship with Candiace. They hug it out. NO MONIQUE NO! Robyn’s thorn was participating in the drama with Michael. Gizelle’s thorn was being shady with Ashley.
And with that, WE ARE FINALLY DONE WITH THE WORST REUNION EVER, But a decent season.
I love this franchise but it spent way too much time on the Michael drama during the reunion. 2 episodes would have been ample.
Did Juan, Pastor Bryant or Karen’s husbands publicly apologize to them for their situations?
GOOD POINT. I was thinking that about Gizelle’s whoring husband specifically.
Someone needs too submit that question to Andy so he can ask Gizelle on her next WWHL appearance! This question is so on point!
I thought they were all very sincere, real, and believable, Michael is a piece of shit, and Ashley needs electroshock therapy or something. I wasn’t bored because it’s no longer about the assaults. It’s a whole new story now about Michael calling every single person a liar and nobody is having it.
Except for monique’s Husband apparently. Monique and husband were really careful not to say what they believed and just stick with what they saw. NFL media training?
Agreed! Downright artful if you ask me. They are good at that game!
This was ridiculous AF!!!!! I like Juan! He’s was the classiest out of the bunch. I cannot stand Candiace. However, her trespassing comment literally did make me LMFAO.
I think Juan keeps his mouth shut because he is in ‘bed’ with Michael financially. Juan is shady.
He was reeeaaaallll quiet. Also his reaction to the marriage thing was quite subdued. Poor Robyn I don’t think he really loves her. Maybe he is gay or just emotionally checked out in general.
I love Juan (and Robyn for the most part) and the Samuels! I feel they’re the realest people on the stage and would be hella fun to hang out with. I can do without Karen and Ray, it was way too obvious that they were gunning for Michael. Matter of fact I can’t stand them. Gizelle and Candiace get on my damn nerves and come across as fake AF. I am so tired of this ass grabbing storyline! Sorry if I come across bitter but I’m just so annoyed that this storyline dominated the series and reunion.
Even though Karen and Ray were going for blood, it’s rumored that Michael and Ashley were the ones that initially leaked to the Washington Post reporter about their money troubles. Supposedly Michael and Ray were actually friends and Ray had confided to Michael about his business failing. And then with Ashley twisting the knife last season….
I agree 100%! I caught myself shouting at the TV. I was so annoyed at all the bullsh_t said. It was their last hit job B4 the season was over. I don’t give a rat’s ass abt if Michael grabbed some guys butt. This was abt gossip and to get even with Ashley and Michael. These women didn’t care abt Ashley bc they didn’t support her. I don’t like Monique but I must say she was a lady during this crap. Karen well she’s her usual self, a super b_tch! She always uses the death of her parents as an excuse, knock that sh_t off, you have always been a b_tch! It was a disgusting display & Bravo messed up big time. I have one message for all these people exonerated might not mean innocent but accusation doesn’t mean guilty either! Let’s not be quick to judge & destroy a person’s reputation, tomorrow it cud be you! Peace!✌
When Candiace said “arrogant, entitled and crazy,” (about Michael) I thought you just described yourself perfectly.
I absolutely thought the same thing!!! It was surreal seeing her say that.
YES! Pot, meet kettle!!!
Yes! I thought the same thing when she said that.
Haha sorry but how tables have turned on Michael. Just last season he had gone out of his way to bring receipts to show that Karen and Ray were renting their home and that Rays company still owed the IRS. This is the week after Karen buried her father. Now he expects sympathy. I know a lot of Australians, we have a huge Australian community here in London and I’ve never heard or seen them grab another persons butt without consent or permission, so nah it’s definitely not a cultural thing. Michael is 60 years old, if he keeps repeating this behaviour and getting flack for it maybe he should look at the way he’s acting and change his ways. I’m actually shocked that Juan let it go as it was Ashley that put it out there a few seasons ago that he had left Robyn and moved to Barcelona to be with another woman and when that went awry he moved back in with Robyn. He was so angry at that rumour that he didn’t even attend that reunion. I hope for the franchise sake that they move past the Michael incidents but I still think if he was seen on camera groping a woman, or saying he wants to suck her p***y attitudes would be different, especially from Andy Cohen.
Chelie thanks for pointing out these facts.It seems everyone forgot about how savage Ashley and Michael were last year.Also you answered my question and my mom’s?We were saying we wished we knew some australians so we could ask them do they go around grabbing butts.
Just to contradict Chelie a bit (and in no way am I a Michael supporter), but I am Australian and while definitely not the type of person to engage in an unsolicited butt grab, the general Australian population are much less uptight and ‘larrikinism’ is definitely part of the culture so what he was saying did ring true to me.
Did it seem like Chris’ affect got more pronounced last night?
Do you mean his tone/manner of speaking? It seemed very contrived to me.
Yup .. I can’t stand him either. He’s got to be a loon if he’s married to crazy
He was trying to look tough and badass
This reunion was a total waste of time. I am sick of discussing Michael Darby. IDGAF what he did. Andy and production milked it way beyond anything reasonable or necessary — or even entertaining.
Andy had absolutely no control over those harpies. They all shrieked over one another and I couldn’t understand half of what was said. smdh
I loathe Karen. IDK why she thinks she is queen. She is the ultimate poser. Her perfume is not sold in any “major department store.” She hawks it on her own website. She is broke ass. Period. Her parents’ death is a very unbelievable and unbecoming reason for her crude and nasty behavior this season. One might think that losing one’s parents would make one introspective about life/how short it is/and how all the bullshit doesn’t matter. Instead, she doubled down. And her constant sexual references were nauseating. Who wants to see her tongue or hear her discuss her sex life? ew
Candiace, her husband and her mother — all mannerless, bloviating, gauche lowlifes. Candiace and her bragging that she was raised on a country club is laughable. No country club would have her ratchet self as a member. Her mother is just thirsty and I hope all potential patients steer clear of her craziness. She can’t behave with manners and her daughter can’t either — great advertising for her skills as a shrink.
Robyn’s belief in a future marriage with Juan is painfully embarrassing. I am sorry for her. But her constant refusal to appear on time, no matter what the event/trip, shows a complete disregard for others.
Bloviating. Perfect word for MANY in the RH franchise.
Ok I vomited in my mouth a little bit when Karen showed the tv audience who she control’s the kiss. I never fucking need to see that old bat do that shit again, ever! I’m so grateful this season is over. Btw, WTF was Candiace wearing? That’s needs to be burned STAT! I’m sorry that Monique wants to be friends with that hood rat again. Thanks for recapping this season TT!
I get what you’re saying about being bored with the topic but this is actually the first time we got a chance to hear Michael’s slippery side of the whole situation after filming stopped. To me he seemed arrogant, prickly, and completely dismissive. Not a good look when you’re facing allegations of not only one incident but many across the span of years. We got to see the “slick” side of Michael which probably has suited him greatly in the business world. The entire conversation was a great case study on how to gaslight a room (unconvincingly) so that no one, including the viewers, fully understands where the lies begin and end. I do have to say that he put on quite a convincing show when it came to his actual innocence. But that’s not exactly hard to do.
The best comment of the night was from Chris. Why on EARTH is Michael’s word more credible than everyone else who has witnessed his actions? When people have been claiming this of Michael for years why are we supposed to just believe him? How arrogant do you even have to be to demand that from a room of your own accusers? The reunion failed to bring up Michael asking if he was micd at L2. Remember he recognized that he probably said some “unfortunate things”? His mic happened to not be working that night. So if he was so drunk that he was saying unfortunate things…then why is everyone else too drunk to have witnessed the same phrase come out of his mouth?
And regarding that strange moment between Ashley and Michael. It was Michael asking Ashley “How did I do?” and he was about to say more before Ashley cut him off to remind him that they were both micd. This was after Michael approached Gizelle to tell her (and practically warn her) that there was so much more to this scandal than she knows.
I no longer watch Potomac and only catch bits occasionally, but I will say this. I wonder why the hell young, beautiful Ashley Darby is wasting her best years on this gross dude. I don’t see any chemistry between them, they have nothing in common, and she gives (his) money to her family.
All I can conclude is that she is his beard. He wants her on his arm because it makes him look good, and he can chase others on the side. And she gets to live a nice life and give money to her family. I wonder how long it will last.
She is using him as a surrogate for her abandoning father. More therapy, everybody!
This franchise is entertaining and I hope they keep this cast, but lose the goofy butt grab type focus. Michael is skeevy. Leave it at that.
You know I really have to give it to Michael he really handled the situation fairly well. It could have gone much worse for him during that interview.
I am so sick and tired of Karen’s entitled ass.
Chris may have had a point but he came across, well a lot like he does on Twitter sometimes when he talks about the show, like a Richard. I see why the two of them stay together. I still like him but to be honest some of what I see him post on Twitter makes me reconsider that.
This got sent to spam, so I am just finding it. I have never seen anyone more thirsty than Candiace and her mom on ANY of the RH franchises. Why was Candace’s husband dressed as the Tidy Bowl man and what is with his accent? So many questions.