This day has gotten away from me. I stayed up WAY too late last night. So this Below Deck Med recap may be even worse than usual. 🙂 I was up very, very, VERY late working on a new post for Friday or Saturday about a new show to recommend. Because, binge watching. Anyway, on to the show. I’ve started using the actual title of the episode as a title for SEO purposes (I don’t know if it helps or not, actually) but if I were naming this episode, based on the previews, I’d name it something like, Captain Sandy Has PMS.
We start with rough seas. This seemed weird to me as someone who grew up on the Med. I never recall it being rough. I was of single digit age and sometimes a group of us would swim out to “Pigeon Island” (Americans tend to rename things while living abroad) and to me it seemed like the longest swim (on rafts) in the entire world. But it was smooth waters for the most part. Anyway. I digress.
It is not smooth sailing this episode. Guests are crawling on the floor and sea sick. I blame Captain Sandy for this. Why didn’t she navigate around this or pull into port somewhere ON THE SOUTHERN COAST OF FRANCE and put them up someplace fancy for a night? I’ve also been very seasick on a boat. It’s horrific. Think you are going to die. You are so happy to get off the boat. And the minute you do, the seasickness disappears immediately.
More Below Deck Med Recaps Here
Captain Sandy finally gets to smoother seas and tells the deckhands to put everything out. Then for some reason (scripted) she goes back to the original Captain Sandy, the micro manager. What happened to BEST CREW EVER?
The Worst Time To Die
The guests have requested a while party. Aesha takes it upon herself to ask Captain Sandy if they can do a white glove service. This is totally scripted. In real life she would suggest it to Hannah. How does she even know if they have white gloves for all the people it would take for that? This is a ridiculous script. But um, carry on? Hannah nixes the idea right away.
More Below Deck Med Recaps Here
While Travis and Collie retrieve 100 white balloons from shore, Jack and Hannah discuss Jack’s future with Aesha and how filthy dirty she would be in bed. Then Joao and Jack take take some guest of on a raft that they are pulling on a jetski and it craps out. Dead in the water.
Captain Sandy, Micromanager
I have been trying to warm up to Captain Sandy but the script apparently has her suddenly micromanaging everything. It makes no sense. She was in love with everyone previously. Best crew ever! Uncomfortably hugging her subordinates and professing her undying love. And now we are back to bitch micromanger? WHO WRITES THIS CRAP? Stop ruining the show! It’s been a great season! Less production interference, PUHLEASE!
More Below Deck Recaps Here
Sandy goes in on Joao over what is wrong with the jetski. Please let her go back to pretend driving the boat or whatever. She’s either the worst captain ever, or following a bad script. Hasn’t she been lick his arsehole all season? Meanwhile, the anchor is dragging again. Whose fault is that? So off to port they go. Didn’t I suggest that at the beginning of the episode?
The best and most genuine part of the episode was Collie Wollie writing raps while on anchor watch.
Double Standards
Aesha points out to Ben that she got bitched at for cooking out of uniform but Ben doesn’t. Learn it now, young lady. We are not all playing by the same rules in this game called life. At least you are pretty. For now. Ben admits he gets away with a lot.
More Below Deck Med Recaps Here
Then we discover that Ben can’t cook eggs. On any cooking contest egg cooking is always a thing. And it is always the demarcation of who can cook, and who cannot. While this is likely scripted as well, I love a negative Ben script. We are supposed to believe he needs to call in Hannah about his alleged piss poor egg cooking? I mean if you are going to write for Below Deck, you need to have at least left your house at some point. Or watched a cooking show or ten. Or know port from starboard. I am enjoying the episode despite the poor writing. But COME ON.
The Send Off
They have to do the tip handover inside the boat due to high winds. These guests were very nice. Aesha wants to take three months off in New Zealand. Me too girl. If I could teleport me an Banjo there I would.
At the tip meeting Captain Sandy “forgives” Joao for he being a bitch. How is that a thing? The thing is an apology. Then she is pissed with Hannah because the white glove service did not happen. These two clearly are not exactly BFFs in real life, but this is just ridiculous. She pees herself over Ben. Again, as much as I want to be a late in life lesbian like Meredith Baxter Birney, it is not going to happen. So I am not aware of the lesbian population. I mean I’ve dabbled and had a friend or two over the years. But I am shocked by how much she feeds into the misogyny. She loves the guys and hates the girls. WTF? Am I misinterpreting this?
More Below Deck Med Recaps Here
Hannah does pretend like they did the white glove service. But, she has no idea why Captain Sandy is asking about it! She had no clue (according to the script) that Aesha went behind her back to Captain Sandy. Captain Sandy again micromanages. All she manages to do is make the stews all pissed at each other. I am so over the script that THE CAPTAIN OF THE SHIP has any interest in table settings!
This is the longest recap in the history of the world. Banjo is really needy tonight, Sorry. Not sorry.
Jack asked Aesha to be his girlfriend via a sheet proposal. You had to be there.
Just guys and Aesha go out on the town. Hannah and Anastasia have to buy fucking table decorations. Or so the script says. THEY ARE PROVIDED AHEAD OF TIME. Clearly Bravo thinks we are stupid. And apparently the large part of the viewing audience does as well.
More Below Deck Med Recaps Here
Jack and Aesha have a date. The other guys bro out at the bar. The guys trash the interior. Especially Ben. Joao is very sick just before the final cruise. Aesha and Jack have sex. Colin goes to get Captain Sandy because Joao is really sick and may need the hospital.
Next week: Spoiler Alert, Joao lives. Captain Sandy’s bitch role continues. Because Misogyny Channel. They would never give Captain Lee this edit.
So over Sandy’s passive aggressive behavior. Be a boss and not a friend to the crew.
I had a coworker who was a lesbian and she hated all us females in the department. She was very selective of who she spoke to. I couldn’t figure it out then as to way she hated us.
Whoever hired the writers, producers, and/or directors should be forced to be a guest on one of Sandy’s trips for a week out in bad seas and bad weather with Mila as the chef.
You are my favorite new commenter.:)
The tables haven’t been as pretty as previous seasons but everyone does it differently, I am always in wonder at how Hannah is the head stew. She always seems lazy to me. Kate May be a bitch but she works her ass off. Bend good always looks good, always. He can be a total dick at times though. I feel bad for Joao, I think he has really done a good job this season and is totally exhausted and he has done it with jack fuckinng around most of the time.
ITA. You’d think before the season starts they would have all the table decorations in one area with a list of what they have. The certainly seemed to have “found” a lot of stuff after Sandy reamed their asses.
Bingo! When they first come aboard, I would think that they would take stock of what is there and what they need. THAT is part of the chief stew’s job. If Hannah didn’t want to take inventory herself, use a phone or tablet to take photos so you know what you have/need. Another peeve. Don’t tell me that the owners of mega million yachts wouldn’t hire a team to deep clean the vessel after the season is over — especially food in reefer. I remember a time when Kate and deckcrew had to do major cleaning on a very short deadline. Production (except, Bravo) would have gone out before and seen that the yacht was clean and ready except for minor tweaks.
Is Captain Sandy getting a bitch edit or just a bitch? I’m going with the latter. She is too invested in the personal dynamics of her crew. They get relaxed and then she’s in butch mode.
I typed bitch mode. Fatness has gone to thumb
Hannah was there serving the guests drinks while Ben is having a fit in the kitchen. She was working why is it a big deal he deliver one plate? He’s the one who screwed up the eggs twice. The attack on Hannah during the tip meeting was unprofessional IMO. Take her up to the bridge and tell her she’s falling short on the table decorations. The deckhands wouldn’t be exhausted if they weren’t up all the time moving the boat around.
Captain Sandy cant act. She doesnt even sound indignant. Do you think there were cue cards? so looking forward to hearing allll the details of Jack and Aesha’s sex life next week, (not)
Devin says
I’m an older guy who thinks Captain Sandy is dead attractive and fun to watch. I know I’m in the minority. I also think that Travis and she should hook up. Wouldn’t that be a great story line? I must be going crazy or maybe it’s just a little dementia.
Why didnt Sandy just buy cool decorations at the show she went to. I’m sure the tourist shops didn’t carry anything nice. Also, Ben has just become a jerk. He will throw anyone under the bus and god forbid he should take out the third attempt at cooking eggs. There is no room in the galley because his inflated ego takes up most of it.
Hate Sandy…and yes she treats most of the girl’s like shit…I cannot even imagine serving with slippery white gloves on EVEN in calm seas…cluster F from the get go unless you have tons of experience doing it. Do you want the food served on the table or do you want it on the floor or in your lap?…right call by Hanna. I have always said Sandy Micro-managed and she even Tweeted back at me about it…hahaha….denfensive much Captain?
I attended a reception which involved the synchronized white glove service. Every single person at my table thought it was the cheesiest thing they’d ever seen. The servers stand behind the diners and at the same time serve all the plates. It causes the diners to fall silent and to freeze up, because if you move your hand in the air, you can throw off the whole thing and the servers have to resynchronize. I agree with Hannah. It’s very old-fashioned and pretentious.
This episode was disappointing but I really enjoyed the charter guest jumping from the aft to the big floating tube and missing his mark. Rewatched many times. Apparently I love other people crashing and burning.
Never have been and will never be a fan of Captain Sandy.
I immediately stopped being a fan of hers when she rewarded Joao last season after HE was the cocky problem on deck for his bosun(s) by making him bosun this season.
When Anastasia was cheffing, wasn’t it a plate of eggs benedict that resulted in Captain Sandy asking the guests if they knew they could get their eggs any way that they wanted,not just what the chef made for them? Now, with Chef Ben, these plates of predetermined breakfasts are fine (just as they have been many times before Anastasia).
One additional thing-if you are concerned about your guest experience up to and including table decor, wouldne’t you take a micromanaging stroll by the table before the dinner and tell them the table needs more? Fix it.
I know. It’s all a storyline.
It’s been acknowledged on any Below Deck series Ben’s appeared on that he always has his worst performance on breakfast service. It seems to be his Achilles Heel and he admits he hates making breakfast for charters.
I thought Ben may have had a good point, The interior staff had their breaks and 8 hrs sleep. The Chef usually sleep deprived as that is the job. Point is the guys worked like crazy w toys etc. This is my first time w Captain Sandy. She vacillates so much from I am Captain to Thanks Sandy. Captain Lee has always been Captain. No cozying. I think it makes big difference.