This should be a fun Southern Charm Recap! Everyone except for Shep and Whitney are hitting the slopes. Plus, Naomie garnered the wrath of Aaron Rothman so he forced her to film a one-on-one with Ashley.
Madison is a great snowboarder. She got up at the crack of dawn to hit the slopes while everyone else slept in and procrastinated. While Whitney and Shep drink and huff pressurized oxygen from cans, the girls get ski lessons. The rest of the guys are apparently winging it. Oh, and Eliza has suddenly shown up out of nowhere this episode. If there was an explanation for that, I missed it.
It appears to be Kathryn’s first time on skis and lets just say she is NOT a natural. I thought Cameran said she knew how to ski, but that doesn’t seem to be the case. Kathryn was just thrilled she survived the magic carpet ride up the bunny hill. Cameran laughed so hard all of them falling down while surrounded by small children doing just fine, that she peed herself. After one unsuccessful lesson and one trip down the bunny hill. The girls and Don all call it a day and head to happy hour.
A Rocky Situation
Madison, Craig and Austen are tearing up the actual mountain on snowboards. Kathryn and Danni ride the gondolas to the top of the mountain. On the way up, Danni wants to know the plans for the evening. As if taking Kathryn to the pot store was not enough, tonight a chef is coming to the house to make pot infused dinner for them. That doesn’t even sound the least bit appetizing. Not to mention, how much is Kathryn supposed to take?
I read an interview with Craig and Austen today where they pointed out that they got confused by the metric system of weighing the pot and bought way more than they could possible use on their trip. Kathryn gives a very sad talking head about the pot everywhere. She says weed is the reason she lost her kids. And the fact that no one on the trip seems the least bit sensitive to that situation is rude.
Kathryn shows Danni a text of Whitney “inviting her over.” Actually is shows her asking if she can come over and he says sure. She was with Patricia at the time and told her not to tell her where she was going. Then there was allegedly a penis photo. Probably from his Grindr account.
Austen Rings The Bell
A popular bar on the slopes of Steamboat Springs is the T-Bar. Austen was “tricked” into ringing the bell which means he is buying shots for everyone in the bar. Or Bravo is. Austen is the guy who makes his dates pay for dinner. Austen is the guy who can’t afford to can the the beer he “invented.”
Meanwhile Shep and Craig are mocking Austen for having fun with Madison at the bar. They just wish they had a girl on the trip with them. They are so jealous and mean. It’s like middle school all over again.
Naomie Pays A High Price for skipping the Colorado Trip
Aaron Rothman in his second of four attempts to get Ashley back on the show, forces Naomie to film with Ashley. She is not a happy camper. Ashley comes in and immediately goes in for the big hug. Um. Noe. Ashley says, SHE doesn’t want to hold a grudge. Naomie points out she called her a bitch in public in front of all of her friends. Ashley says she meant it in a good way. Ashley wants to know how to mend things with Kathryn. Naomie makes it clear that is not going to happen. Ashley says she is actually on Kathryn’s side. Um, NOE.
The Boys Get Higher Than The Rockies
Back at the houses, Shep and Austen are pregaming for their weed dinner with edibles. As one does. The cannabis chef arrives looking high as a kite. At the other house, Madison confronts Craig for always having something to say about her relationship, or lack thereof, with Austen. It’s really none of his business and he’s not privy to their situation. So he needs to stop giving them unsolicited advice. Great idea!
Back at pot central, even the wine has CBD in it! Look, I tried pot on more than one occasion back when dinosaurs roamed the earth. And I had one of two reactions. Usually, I just immediately needed to sleep. Except for that one time I was camping on Cumberland Island with a guy and all we brought with us were sleeping bags, a huge cooler of beer, some cheetos and raw hot dogs.
It gets REALLY dark on Cumberland island and there are mountain lions and raccoons and lots of things in the trees with orange eyes. It didn’t help that the Cheetos were not carefully eaten, due to him being high. So everything on the island game to the tree we were trying to sleep under. I have never been so paranoid in my life and it was a walk of several hours back to where people were. I was stuck there. Once the sun came up, we went skinny dipping and sunbathed nekkid and then drank the beer and marched ourselves back to within ear shot of the official camping area. I don’t see the appeal of pot.
Cameran comes in and says she is not interested in the weed dinner at all. Yet she takes a sip of Chelsea’s wine with the CBD. Austen and Shep are both high as kites before dinner begins. We keep seeing Don without Eliza. I am going to have to find out what she was avoiding the cameras. Or they were avoiding her.
A Pot Peace Treaty?
Shep is being fake nice to Madison because she looks amazing her black jumpsuit. She asks him for an edible and he obliges. But for some reason this conversation has to take place in his bedroom. Shep seems to want to make up with Madison. But he wants her to admit she was just “toying with Austen.” Shep can never believe that anyone would choose Austen over him. Frankly, any female with a shred of dignity would choose pretty much anyone over Shep.
Madison points out that Shep called her “white trash.” She says she will not tolerate that sort of behavior, Especially since he doesn’t even know her. You go girl. Madison, looks stunning tonight. That along with all of the edibles is making him more tongued-tied than usual. His response was, “Yeah, but it keep coming up!” WTF is he talking about. He says he always has to take his friends side. He never treats Austen like a friend. They are not friends. He is always mocking Austen. Madison says Shep is a bad influence. Shep says that Austen is never happy with her. Shep says a ton more shit. Then he apologizes. Madison will think about accepting it.
Pot Leaf Runners Adorn The Dinner Table
I feel like I am getting a contact high just watching this dinner. There is a debate over whether they should say a blessing over the drug infused dinner. Then nays win. Kathryn is not amused by any of this. Austen is supposedly the person who scheduled the pot chef. Kathyrn was actually very subtle in telling him she felt he should have run it past her. If I were in her situation, I wouldn’t eat bite of anything even thought the chef only put the CBD in the optional dressings. Allegedly. It’s not worth the risk, and kind of shitty of production. But, hey, it’s Haymaker. They are also trying to make her have run-ins with Ashley.
Once again, I don’t see Eliza at the table. I know Haymaker had to go back and do a lot of post-production edits. Are they purposely wiping her from the cast? I’m not complaining. It’s just kind of weird.
Kathryn Finally Becomes Triggered
Kathryn checks her phone at the dinner table only to discover that on WWHL Whitney has called Kathryn a “drug addict violent sociopath.” Ut oh. This will not end well. And it was said in front of Cameran and Landon so this has to be really old. Right? And it is. Apparently, Kathryn was looking back at what these people said about her at the time her world was falling apart. Whitney has always been a snake. Kathryn gets up and goes outside. Just as the script calls for. She heads back to her house next door. Only Craig goes to check on her.
Want To Know What Happens Next On Southern Charm?
Click Here For Four Posts With All Season 6 Spoilers!
When Craig comes back to the table a lot of people are high. They laugh when Craig tells them why Kathryn left. Cameran is laughing too. Is she high too or just a bitch? Craig finally shames Whitney into going to talk to Kathryn. Whitney finds Kathryn sitting outside in the dark. She doesn’t want to speak to him. He leaves. She probably just wanted to smoke without the cameras.
On next weeks Southern Charm recap. Austen tells Madison he wants them to be like this all the time. Madison says that is not enough. Shep continues to drive a wedge between Austen and Madison. Madison threatens to expose what Shep is really angry about. Austen says something that make Danni cry.
P.S. I have no idea why this recap took so long. Other than I felt stoned just watching this.