This is only the third Southern Charm NOLA recap of the season. Doesn’t it feel like more? Tonight’s episode features an on camera proposal. In other words, the staged scenes are going to be in full effect. At any rate, it can’t possibly be any more depressing than tonight’s RHOP episode.
Tamica Lee and Reagan Charleston’s friend, Rachel, stop by Reagan’s new house. Tamica strongly suspects that Reagan is pregnant. So she compares Reagan’s store opening to birthing babies. After making some jab at Kelsey, Tamica keeps on telling Reagan that her life is not “fine.” Tamica is a bad friend. Both girls feel like Reagan in denial about her feelings surrounding divorcing Jeff. It’s clear to me that she is fine and has just move on to her next target.
Jon Moody and Jeff Charleston meet up to shoot some hoops and process the events of Reagan’s store opening party. Jeff says the divorce was official a couple of days ago. Now he just wants to get laid. It’s been eight months. Divorces seem to move swiftly in Louisiana. The guys are also worried that Jeff hasn’t gone through a grieving stage. Jeff says that Reagan was really controlling. I think he is just happy to be free. Jon is a good friend.
Kelsey and Reagan go out for soup and salads at lunchtime. They bond over Tamica’s meangirl behavior. Kelsey is having a housewarming party. She’s not sure she wants to invite Tamica. But it’s an all cast so she will be there.
Barry and Tamica check into a beautiful hotel to have some alone time. They go out to a really nice restaurant for dinner. Gumbo? Crab beignets? Yes please. This show makes me so hungry! The restaurant is right across the street from where they got married. They only have one wedding photo because they were scammed by the photographer. Despite being away from the kids, they talk about the kids. Then their daughter called. The next morning we see Barry naked in the shower and Barry naked in a towel. I don’t know why they think we want to see all these guys naked. But, they can make this whole season Barry in the shower and I’d save every episode to rewatch.
Then we have Jon Moody and his fine metrosexual ass shopping with Jeff. He’s going to help him get his swagger back and get back in the dating game. This whole show should be just about the men. Jon is concerned that even though Jeff says he wants to get back out there, he’s still way to close to Reagan. This will affect his future relationships.
Reagan arrives to film her proposal on a horse farm with full glam, in a dress with heels. I didn’t think it possible but Reece looked like an even bigger douche in the flashback photo of the two of them in 2007. Anyway, Reece leaves her in the barn so he can dash out and sprinkle rose petals on the lawn. He could not have done this ahead of time? Apparently, Reagan’s mother has provided the engagement ring. Allegedly, it’s a family heirloom. She said yes.
Tamica’s cousin Jarrod meets up with Kelsey down by the bayou. He has a surprise come to Jesus moment put together for Kelsey and Tamica. He’s going to attempt to broker a reconciliation between these two. If he succeeds at this, we need to sent him to the middle east. Oh wait. He just tricked them both into coming and is now just going to leave them both there bay a large body of water. Tamica starts off being Tamika. Kelsey is her own sweet self. She invites Tamika to her housewarming. This scene didn’t change a thing.
Reagan and Jeff meet for lunch. Reagan is not wearing her engagement ring. She tells Jeff that Reece asked her to marry him and he is at a loss for words. He is not taking the news well. As he is reeling Reagan is grinning from ear to ear. The ink on the divorce papers isn’t even dry. Eventually he hugs her and says he is happy for her. But clearly, he is not. Then he says he is relieved. That seemed to bother Reagan. She asked him about it. Jeff says that if he wanted her back, he would have come back for her. Heh, that had to sting Reagan a little. In his confessional he says she is making a mistake moving on too fast. Plus, she went backward instead of forward.
Reece was pissed that Reagan ran straight to Jeff to tell him about their engagement. He thinks they dragged their feet on the divorce and now that they are divorced they still spend so much time together. Reagan feels like he must have had a bad day at work. He points out he has a real job and doesn’t sell Anne Klein costume jewelry from the 1980s. She storms off.
Kelsey and Justin are both dressed as ninjas for their party. They debate whether numbchucks or throwing stars will be necessary around Kelsey. I just had to google for Kelsey’s last name for tags and people are really comfortable saying mean things about her looks. WTF is wrong with the world? Apparently this is not the housewarming party at all, it’s a haunted house tour for Halloween. Barry as the voodoo king and Jon Moody as “Little Richard Simmons” are everything.
Reagan announces to the group that she and Reece are getting married! Dead silence. No one knows how to react. Tamica is pissed. Barry is stunned. This is literally the second time they have met the guy.
Next week: The Halloween tours continue, Kelsey has her housewarming. Tamica of course is disrespectul at the party. Jeff has an awkward first date. The group learns that the wedding is in just a few weeks.