I’m not sure I am ready for a RHOP Recap! I am quite sure I don’t remember any of RHOP’s names! But I shall try my best! As it turns out, RHOP didn’t tape due to Game of Thrones and American Idol! So It’s going to have to wait until tomorrow.
So, it’s tomorrow and there have already been three bizarre fires to put out with regard to the site. I am not sleeping well. I’m not following my Lentil Season Part Two plan very well. I fell in the yard this weekend and smashed my knee. And I don’t remember much about these people because of the Old Timers early onset. And yet, I shall power through this as best as I can.
This season trailer is so over the top outrageous. I followed the story about Michael Darby and it was a whole lot of nothing. But of course the media didn’t cover that. For that reason alone I will be riding hard for Ashley this year. So, Prepare yourself. Oh and Candiace is a horrible person.
Now that filming has started, Gizelle has decided to go to counseling with Sherman. She says it is because the girls love him so much. I think it’s for the cameras. I do not understand Sherman and Gizelle together at all.
Also because of filming, someone has to be Karen Huger’s friend. Gizelle has apparently drawn the short straw. Apparently, this truce is scheduled to go down via some homemade cookies.
Okay, if I am going to ride hard for Ashley this season, I need to do it with less sexual interaction with Michael. Especially first thing in the morning. Sadly, this not realistic because Ashley is on a mission to get pregnant. Production needs to stop putting the unproven charges that were thrown out by prosecutors out there. That was a hit job by a Truly Original employee.
Oh for Pete’s sake. Are we still pretending Karen is living in this house? I thought that was fully addressed last season. Every door is closed to the house except the room Karen is in. There is a Chanel blanket on a sofa and two pairs of shoes creatively displayed in the closet. Give me a break.
Matt, AKA the white guy, has arrived with some sort of promotional bag. There is a pitcher of lemonade at the ready. Karen is genuinely grieving the death of both of her parents in the same year. That has to be very difficult.
The scene is apparently for Gizelle to show up with her homemade cookies as a peace-offering. This could not be more staged. Karen wants apologies from everyone. Eventually, Gizelle is allowed to drop off the cookies to Karen. So contact was made. But the entire scene was just ridiculous.
I don’t remember much about Monique. Is she the one that got drunk and drove into a tree? She’s very pregnant and very crabby at the moment. Chris thinks Monique needs to apologize to Gizelle for talking about some alleged arrest of Sherman for prostitution in the park. Most of this story doesn’t ring a bell for me at all even with all the much-needed flashbacks.
Robyn really wants you to know that she and Juan are having the sex. Lots and lots of the sex. They may even have it on camera right now.
I want to eat at Chris’s restaurant. I’m starving. She is inviting her half-brother Michael to the wedding. Michael is a child that was born as the result of her father’s infidelity. Candiace’s mama is not going to like this at all. Chris is such a sane and kind guy. Why is he with Candiace?
Karen stops by Candiace’s house for the first time ever. She’s got to film with someone. She mocks the dead bonsai tree that Ashley gave Candiace at her engagement party. I think we all knew that would happy. Candiace is not the type to care for or nurture other living things. Then they talk about Candiace’s brother. Candiace is struggling to reconcile her relationship with her mother and her relationship with her brother.
Later, at Candiace’s house, Candiace and her mother arguing over how to cook eggs. Then she tells her mother that she has invited her brother to the wedding. It didn’t go well. Candiace needs to be loyal to the woman bought her all her pageant dresses! How does she not get this!? Candiace cries in the kitchen talking to her mother. Candiace cries weeks later retelling the story in her talking head. Her mama says those crocodile tears don’t mean anything.
Next week on RHOP, it’s time for Candiace’s wedding and it has all the drama of a Bravo wedding. Plus someone has betrayed Gizelle. Gizelle comes for Monique at the wedding. See you next week for another RHOP Recap!