Once again the lastest Mexican Dynasties Recap is late. This is because they picked such a busy night to air it on and I really just want to watch it when I have a moment to enjoy it. I feel this is the only season we will get and so I’m going to savor it. Plus, those of you who watch the show are smart, kind and patient. Unlike well… moving on.
Oscar Madrazo and Tarek
Oh dear sweet Oscar. Someone needs to explain to you what Grindr is all about. It’s not a good idea to fly a fuckbuddy from Brazil to you country for a visit. You have more money than sense. I am reluctant to hit play to discover how badly this will play out. I will say Tarek is cuter in person than he is on Facetime.
So either Oscar or Bravo has set Tarek up in a beautiful hotel suite. Oscar lets us all know he is wearing his Brazilian underwear. It’s already pretty cringe worthy. Apparently, Tarek wanted to marry Oscar right away. We all do honey. He’s adorable and rich. And he’s about to get laid. The Do Not Disturb sign is hung on the door and the cameras are kicked out.
La Familia Allende
Over at La Casa Allende they operate on my schedule with breakfast around one pm. At least for the help. La Familia sleeps in until Chio awakens them around 1:45pm. Even then they don’t get up. Technically, Fernando has been up for a while but he really just relocated to the balcony to nap in the sun.
At 2:30 Mari and Adan finally stumble in to the kitchen where Chio has prepared fried eggs with cheese. I’m not particularly fond of eggs but these look delicious. Adan finally tells Mari that Doris is his manager and needs to be the lead in all of his business dealings. From now on whatever Mari does with regard to arranging meetings for him must go through her. That went over like a lead balloon. I don’t believe he will stick to this. Mari probably doesn’t either.
La Familia Bessudo
Raquel has a hot date with an old friend at a very fancy restaurant. They have been friends since early childhood and he has always carried a torch for her. The waiter comes for a drink order and he asks Raquel about a wine preference. She says tequila. Then she changes her mind to mescal. The waiter returns with a bottle of mezcal marca negra and gets her date’s approval before pouring it. Her date is clearly in love with her, and smart and kind and clearly has money and class. He may even have his own Mexican Dynasty! Alas, our superficial Raquel doesn’t care for anyone who is not thin. Her loss.
Tostados de Tierra
Since Oscar is otherwise occupied, Paulina needs someone to film with. So, she invites Elan and Jenny Allende to dinner with her date Jose. The restaurant has a dish that one must be very adventurous to try. Paulina doesn’t want to tell Jenny what it is. It’s clearly some sort of Mexican version of “rocky mountain oysters.” While we wait for the Mexican delicacy to be prepared, Paulina and Jose regale us with the story of how Paulina saved his life. As it turns out, dirt tostados are worm tostadas. Gross!
An Now For a Cultural Experience
Doris Bessudo is throwing a small event for one of her artists, a painter named Miguel Millo. Adan will also be giving a musical performance. Doris has invited all the top people in the music industry. What could possibly go wrong? First, Adan has to slide into a pair of his jeans. He buys nothing but women’s junior department size five. The only thing that surprises me about this is that he doesn’t wear Garanimals.
Oscar brings Tarek to the event and Paulina is all over him like white on rice. She wants Oscar married ASAP. Poor Oscar. Why can’t they just let him live! Tarek loves Oscar’s mom. Who doesn’t? Miguel proceeds to paint a naked girl covered in clay. Fernando could not be more thrilled by this experience. Speaking of Fernando the artiste, I kind of love his flower lion painting from this week. Of course Fernando has to paint and fondle the model. Fernando totally hijacks the even and gets the artist to paint his face.
What Are Your Intentions With My Mother?
Doris meets Sammy, Raquel latest pursuer. She is not happy to see her mother dating. Sammy would be a great catch.
Mari and Doris bicker over Adan. Mari points out that Doris has never represented a singer before. Then she pretends like she is thrilled about Adan’s new manager. She’s probably trying to think up ways to kill Doris without being caught.
Adan … Well…Adan Gives A Performance Alright
When it is time for Adan to sing, he sounds really good! I feel like I know this song and it is his original. They are somehow ingraining the song into our brains! Mari is pissed at the lack of grandeur of the stage. “The crowd” of a dozen people or so sings along. And then Adan goes for the high note. It’s a colossal fail. Even his tiny manparts being constricted in teen-aged girl sized jeans doesn’t allow him to hit the note. It’s beyond bad.
Next time the Mexican Dynasties recap will discuss Doris’s online investigation of Sammy, Jenny and Elan try to set Elan up with a young girl, it’s the second anniversary of Paulina and Oscar’s show ¡Que Madrazo! and Mari has it in for Doris.