Tonight on RHOBH, Dorit Kemsley deals with the fallout of the tabloid story Lisa Vanderpump planted. Kyle Richards has an epic fallout with Lisa Vanderpump that ends their friendship forever. Can this please be the finale episode with Lisa Vanderpump in it?
LVP arrives at Vanderpump Dogs to find a crew filming from the Puppy Bowl. Dog aficionado, LVP tells us that the Puppy Bowl airs “right before the Superbowl.” Wrong. The Puppy Bowl is counterprogramming to the Super Bowl for people who don’t care about football. It’s a bunch of dogs running around on a “football field.” Even I know that, and I’ve never watched it in my life. Clearly, neither has LVP.
Also, although the dogs are all from rescue shelters they will have been adopted by the time the show actually airs and their stories are told on the show. So it is not a show to get the dogs adopted. Also, Giggy, dying or not, would not be eligible as it is a puppy bowl and puppies are allowed up to the age of 21 months.
Lisa Vanderpump has a competing scene with her own charity event at soul cycle. A congressman is going to have a resolution passed in the house to reconsider their stance on making a statement about other countries eating dog meat. It’s a step below making resolution to declare national hot dog day. LVP has a representative from Florida coerced into giving her a shoutout for the show. So she can pretend to be shocked. It’s nauseating really. She also thinks that the US can ban the trade of dog and cat meat all over the world. She’ a moron. The resolution just says we don’t condone other countries selling dog and cat meat. Just like resolutions they pass to have national cupcake day says “we support cupcakes.”
Teddi Mellencamp has always been very supportive of Lisa Vanderpump and Vanderpump Dogs. She has organized a spin class to raise money for the shelter. Of course Vanderpump won’t bother to show up for it but everyone else will.
Dorit Kemsley calls Teddi the morning of the event to talk about the ROL article that LVP planted. They both talk about LVP acting like she was over the entire thing at Denise’s wedding. Of course all the girls talk about LVP leaking to ROL before the event.
I Don’t Give A Flying Fig About LVP!
After spin class, all the ladies do a miraculous wardrobe change and head to Fig & Olive for lunch. How the hell did that happen. I do not believe the RHOBH are capable of such a quick change.
Of course they talk about LVP not showing up. Kyle tells them about her little viewing party at Vanderpump Dogs. It’s clear that her TV viewing was much later than the spin class. Kyle tries to defend LVP. She says that LVP is not there to defend herself. Shady productions flashes back to another time Kyle has defended LVP from actions she has actually done.
Lisa Rinna says that when she started the show, LVP told her that if she ever needed help with the press to leak a story. She gave Rinna the name and number of the person to contact if she ever needed it. But let’s not let facts get in the way.
Kyle is forced to admit that Lisa Vanderpump has been accused of this in the past. Roll that beautiful bean footage, production! And they do. Adrienne Maloof confronted her about selling to ROL. LVP says that she was never paid. Of course not. She just feeds them what she wants them to publish. She doesn’t need the $500 payment for it. Kyle does admit the only person that benefits from the story is Lisa Vanderpump and Vanderpump Dogs.
Dorit plays the victim role to the hilt. It did bring out all the crazy LVP fans who mocked Dorit and her children. They are just nasty, ignorant pieces of shit. And there are hoardes of them coming for all the other RHOBH.
Kyle and Teddi Mellencamp arrive at a gorgeous Beverly Hills home owned by one of Kyle’s friends, Sharon. It seems like a very interesting to time to meet new friends on the show. Ah, Sharon is a jeweler who is going to recreate some of Kyle’s mother’s jewelry that was stolen in the break-in.
Then Teddi and Kyle discuss the fact that LVP summoned TMZ to Vanderpump Dogs to “talk about the dog resolution” that didn’t happen. I remember seeing this video. It was the oddest thing. Let’s watch it again. Shall we? And remember, she is going to say she called them to talk about “getting the resolution to the floor.” You know, the one she said in the other scene that “passed.”
This is LVP not wanting to talk to the press about Dorit Kemsley. Clearly, the TMZ guy had been told what questions to ask. She didn’t use the platform to talk about a house resolution (that has no effect on other countries) she talked about Dorit all the while saying that is not why they are there.
Harry Hamlin is planning a solo trip to mountain climb in Canada. He’s packing upscale MREs to eat and traveling light. We bring up Nicolette Sheridan again. This whole scene is production driven. One of my commenters recently said that it seems like they are setting up for a Nicolette Sheridan appearance on the show. I didn’t pay it much attention but now I’m a believer. The phrase, Lisa VanderTrump is coined.Harry Hamlin pretends he wishes that Lisa Rinna was going with him.
A Swan Shit Bridge Too Far…
On Kyle’s ride over we are reminded of the time Kyle Richards defended LVP over her plan to take down Yolanda Foster with the Munchausen story.
I can’t even being to recap this play acting on LVP’s part. She’s shocked by “all the negative stories.” However does this happen? LVP says she “didn’t even read it properly.” Now that is a lie. LVP describes exactly what she did and then asks why she would do that. We all know why. All of this is her big chance to get rid of Dorit without looking like she did it. The same way she fed the surrogacy story to Brandi Glanville. The same way she set up Lisa Rinna with the Yolanda Foster Munchausen situation. The same way she set up Camille Grammer with the Taylor Armstrong abuse allegations. This is not new behavior and neither is LVP’s “Who me?” reaction.
Kyle tells LVP that she absolutely believes that she gave ROL the story about Dorit. LVP swear on all sorts of things that she would never give a story to ROL. Puhlease. Also see here for why LVP’s responses are that of a liar. LVP storms off in a huff. The friendship is over. It’s Nene Leakes and Cynthia Bailey, RHOBH version.
Ken Todd may have an aneurysm over this. He gets up and Kyle’s face. He shows her “the proof” the TMZ video they also paid for. Blind Item Reveal!The TMZ video was supposed to make everyone believe LVP didn’t give ROL the story. He’s furious it didn’t work!
Ken says Kyle has “joined the gang.” WTF until this debacle Dorit and Teddi were so far up LVP’s ass it was ridiculous. They were rabid LVP fans!
LVP takes her doggie and Ken and storms off upstairs for a second and final time and tells Kyle to get the fuck out of her house. And back over the Swan Shit Bridge she goes. For the last time? Which is sad. Not because the friendship is over, but because I have some many gorgeous photos of Kyle in that fuschia hat I wanted to use. I’ll save them for flashbacks. Seriously, Kyle looks stunning in every frame of RHOBH footage. It makes it impossible to choose a shot!
P.S. There are a LOT of great links to past LVP stories in this post. Please check them out.
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