I am so ready for the Real Housewives of New Jersey to just go away. I’ve had enough. We did not three episodes of this crap. I am going to try to be brief tonight because I am running very late and I just want to get to RHONY!
Let’s just get ‘er done.
We start with Teresa Giudice acting like she is not sleeping with Blake Schreck. She is blaming the kids for not moving to Italy. It would be great for the kids to move to Italy. There needs to be an adult making decisions in that house. Joe Gorga seems to think that Teresa should stay married to Joe Giudice. Oh wait. He is blaming Joe Giudice.
The Men Take The Stage
I’m bored. They asked the husbands to come up with their own taglines.
Bill Aydin: A nip tuck a day, allows my wife to spend and play.
Evan Goldschneider: I have four kids, two degrees and one kickass wife. (Teresa tried to roll her eyes out of her head. JEALOUS)
Frank Catania: I work hard, I play hard, I spend all my money on boats and whore. (Clazzy)
Joe Gorga: (wraps himself in a gold tablecloth) I don’t flip tables. I have sex on them. (Good Grief,) I’m not a plumber, but I know how to lay pipe.
Joe Josephs: If you want the job done right, ask me…and I’ll do your wife. (WTF is wrong with these people?)
Danielle Staub Enters The Fray
The ladies come after her for doing interviews with TMZ about her divorce. She also tried to sell her rings on social media.
Danielle’s lies are not worth recapping. Only Dave Quinn from People magazine believes anything she says. Joe Joesphs says he believes that Marty Caffrey was saying things Danielle Staub wanted him to say. They guys are all friends with Marty Caffrey now. Margaret Josephs says she put on a sham wedding to be on a TV show.
Kim G. From Franklin Lakes has a question! ” How did Jackie feel after Danielle hurled and innuendo at her about her and Melissa having lesbian vibes. When Danielle pretended to be gay herself? Jackie thinks using sexual preference as an insult it wrong. Danielle says she just thought they were very close. It was weird. Melissa says Danielle was like that with Margaret last season.
Teresa Giudice continues to stick up for Danielle. She says Danielle texted her every day while her grandmother was in the hospital. 
Melissa Gorga and Teresa Giudice continue to fight. Melissa says that Teresa didn’t have a bad thing to say to Jennifer after she broke a wine glass. Dolores Catania did. She says usually if that happens (really? this happens a lot in your real life?) someone is getting hurt. Teresa Giudice really doesn’t give a shit. Teresa tries to say her husband is in prison. That has nothing to do with anything. Nor does Teresa Giudice give a shit about Joe Giudice now that he can’t buy her shit.
A Very Bizarre Trio of Gifts
Danielle Staub gives Teresa Giudice a necklace with her initials. She’s wearing the same one. Who is gay now? It ends with a long hug. Andy has a look on his face that sort of sums what I was was feeling. WTF? Andy points out Teresa looks a bit uncomfortable as she looks for someplace to hide the gift. Not to be outdone, Jennifer Aydin also has a gift for Teresa. This is just bizarre. It’s a pearl bracelet with a photos of Teresa and her mother.
The cast gives Andy Cohen an electric car for suitable for a five year old for his baby. They all give him a piece of parenting advice. Dolores says he is so maternal already, he will be fine. They also gave him an Adidas track suit. He seemed to really like that.
The end.
I really like Bill- he seems rational and ok with making a joke of the eccentricities.
Frank- WHY do you continue to make jokes about whores?!? I get that it’s part of his history, but to keep bringing it up is pouring salt on the wound.
Melissa was very diplomatic in response to Teresa’s decision about moving. I get that it’s a hard decision- but the adult should make the decision, not the kids. Consider what the kids need? Yes. Ask them to make the decision? No. Especially when you know at least one child will want to move.
I do not believe she asked the girls’ opinions. Joey was adamant that his daughter would not consider splitting the family, and they would all move away with him. Antonia is very close in age to Gabriella and Milania. Teresa does not want to leave her life for anyone or any reason. She likes the trappings of fame way too mich.
Too much!!
Exactly! Teresa couldn’t give a flip about Joe. After not visiting him for months/years, NOW that Bravo cameras want to film, she’s going to visit him! And bring the girls. What a disgusting excuse for a human!
I…don’t necessarily believe moving to Italy would be the best thing for the girls. Gia is graduating high school this year and will almost definitely want to go to college here. I’d be very surprised if she went to college far from home (although I think it’d be good for her to get far away from this toxic mess), and I can see her wanting to come home often, but that’s speculation.
I’m not under the impression the other girls speak a lick of Italian. They may pick it up because I do remember Joe speaking it with family in their younger years, but again speculation. Anyway, uprooting those girls from New Jersey where they have all of the family and friends they have ever known, an established routine, a school system they are on track with, and are well adapted to their culture to a totally foreign country with an entirely different school system, different language, and vastly different culture could set these girls back academically, be emotionally traumatic, and cause all kinds of depression and anxiety.
Also, Tre would be taking a big leap of faith career wise that her husband and herself could find adequate, non reality tv type of professions. I’m not saying Tre doesn’t do shady stuff still, but she does seem to have stable income now for the time being, and she doesn’t have a network in Italy for work like she has in the US.
I’m not saying Tre is taking these things into consideration when weighing the pros and cons of uprooting her life for her husband (who isn’t a good person, Teresa just sucks, too, and their daughters seem to legitimately love their father) who never bothered to become a US citizen.
Best case scenario, in my opinion, for the girls is to stay in New Jersey with their established support system and spend summers and holidays with their dad like a dad who moved across the country to California post-divorce. Also, let Gia make her own decisions on visitations because she’ll be an adult soon.
Note: I’m not calling any of the girls rocket scientists, and I suppose international schools are possible if there are any around, but Italy’s public education system is built very differently from the U.S.’s and it will be hard for the girls to acclimate even if they are fluent in Italian.
Tl;dr Tre made the right decision in staying…probably for the wrong reasons
She could put them in one of the International American schools where they’re taught in English and they’ll learn Italian. Caroline was right – Andy should’ve rolled that bean footage. Tre would’ve gone nutz
@1sttimer. I totally agree with you. I think it’s easier for Teresa to blame it on the kids instead of just saying that she doesn’t want to move. I would go in a heart beat unless I was done and over my husband (which I think Teresa is).
Hope Teresa gets her own show and we can be done with all of the frauds, con artists and generally skeevy people on this show that don’t represent the Garden State. Jackie included– JD, mommy blogger and thirsty bitch. I agree with Teresa. Aspirational not so much. They are all gross.
Just curious. Do you believe Teresa represents your state well?
The only person I’m NOT ashamed of on the show is Jackie, and I live in NE NJ near NYC. I also have a soft spot for Dolores because of her huge heart & charitable endeavors with the homeless & animals (but don’t like her job as Tre’s “Yes Woman”)!
Just curious, when you say frauds, con artists and skeevy people do you know what those words mean?
Uhm yeah. Those are pretty basic terms and we all don’t need to agree. I also didn’t say I’d watch Teresa’s show. If she leaves, the franchise goes down the tubes. It has before. Felons, frauds and skeevy people be gone.
Having a JD neither makes me intelligent nor my life “kick ass.” Jackie’s education also doesn’t make her interesting or relevant. Being a former or current lawyer is not inspirational. Mcmansions in Bergen county in foreclosure or loaded with fake marble are not aspirational. And they are not representative of NJ even remotely.
The most watchable and articulate housewives don’t have college degrees. What BH housewives even went to college– Camille?
Common terms, but thanks for the question. The point is no show without Teresa. I didn’t say I’d watch a spin off. So the con artists, frauds and skeevey people would be gone. And i don’t know how to spell skeevy btw (even with 2 degrees). Damn my kick ass life.
Jackie’s education does not make her interesting or relevant. It bugs me that she brought nothing but an attack on the felon. Also, some of the best housewives IMO don’t even have a college education. Who has one on BH– Camille?
I think you missed TT’s point. It was not a comment on anyone’s intelligence. I believe most of us are wondering why you feel Teresa does not exemplify any if not most of those descriptors.
I do think Teresa is all of those things, and probably more…. She and Joe ripped off my local lumber company. That doesn’t make me automatically like Jackie though.
What I was saying was that if Teresa goes, they all do. She’ll take them all down by leaving. I won’t watch her spin off if there is one.
Thank you for explanation. I see how you could feel that none of them represent NJ well. I am sorry that businesses you frequent suffered due to criminal behavior.
You do know Teresa is a convicted felon, right? She was convicted of FRAUD.
OMG, I said they were ALL gross. But thanks for piling on with this revelation. It’s OK for me to not [insert expletive] like Jackie.
No you didn’t say that about all of them. You said you hoped Teresa would get her own show and that all of the skeevy, people, cons and frauds would be gone. And then you specifically mentioned Jackie as fitting those descriptors.
No one cares if you don’t like Jackie. I think we are all aghast that your rationale is that you think she is the skeevy, fraudulent, con artist of the bunch.
Frank Catania is an example that having a JD doesn’t mean you are not a skeevy, fraudulent con artist. But Jackie has not exhibited any of those traits.
You comment just seemed like opposite day.
I said if Teresa gets her own show, NJ will be over. Perhaps I didn’t realize how much the comment would be dissected.
Jackie has parents who committed tax evasion. Is that really so different from fraud? We are self employed and quarterly payments are a nightmare. I lose sleep over it— not knowing if a distribution will cover the tax estimated payment.
Jackie has zero empathy for teresa despite her background and being old enough to know what was going on with tax evading parents. If it was jail or home arrest and not a fine, it was BAD. Jackie had an agenda to go after Teresa. That makes her skeevy if she has that background. My opinion. So what if others disagree?
Calling someone skeevy is not character assasination:
skee·vyDictionary result for skeevy
/ˈskēvē/Submit
adjectiveINFORMAL•US
unpleasant, squalid, or distasteful.
It seems like you are implicating Jackie in her parents’ crimes and that is not fair. Teresa is directly responsible and benefited very nicely from those crimes committed. I am from the 07458. Many of my family members and HS friends still live in the area. The only HWs that come close are Jackie and Margaret. That’s my opinion. I like how Melissa has matured but the rest can go kick rocks. Especially that fraud Danielle. That is one fly human and it shows on her face. The other two need to move to Camden.
Not fly lol, ugly.
It is usually people with lower IQs who accuse another of having an “agenda”. jackie was real-she saw a stupid attack on Melissa and stepped in to defend her. It was not as if she was gunning for Teresa. Entirely logical to point out one cannot control a spouse.
Teresa and her followers are always intimidated by intelligence. Teresa did not have a coherent answer to why she stayed silent on a number of issues.
Stalker, agenda, known for a hot minute are nonsensical retorts.
Gia, is that you?
This was a response to Kdwagz.
NY was amazing in the 1st episode. Jersey needs to go away .
Agree! I’m over Teresa! I’m over RHONJ. I did watch this season, but really feel like RHONJ has run its course.
Skanky ppl …..so glad it is done!
Can’t wait for your RHONY recap. So good!
I hope that’s it FOREVER unless Carolyn returns.
I was really proud of Melissa – she spoke very clearly and persuasively and her points about Teresa’s comments and actions were spot on. Even “yes” woman, Deloris was often nodding in agreement.
I think Dolores is ripe to switch sides next season.
Why do these women dress so tacky? They are a bridge away from NYC. What is about NJ that is always TOO MUCH sequin, TOO MUCH bronzer, TOO MUCH make up and SO LOUD. Why is this? Other than that question, I’m glad they are gone. They are exhausting to watch. Thank you for recapping these weirdo’s TT.
I’ve lived in North Eastern NJ where these women live and I NEVER see women dressed like this-ever.
They’re guidettes from Paterson. More is always better. Jennifer is just vulgar. Jackie is more to type.
Bingo! Like grown-up versions of the Jersey Shore cretins! I don’t know anyone who looks, dresses or speaks like the RHONJ cast either. It’s obvious that the producers were going for a Sopranos stereotype group of women. I’d prefer it if they swap the whole cast out next year, but I doubt it will ever happen.
They remind me of the “travelers” we had in GA. Short story, promise, I worked at Belks in Augusta, GA in 88/89ish? There was a “traveler” community close, if I recall in SC… anywho, the ladies were crazy made up, even their little girls were made up, mascara, jewelry. Easily recognized which was good because the con was on when they entered the mall, giggle!
As someone from South Jersey – NONE of these women represent Jersey well. There’s a whole section of the state that are nothing like these overblown stereotypes of what NJ Women are like.
When Joe Gorga was talking before the rest of the husbands came out, he was saying something that he was incredibly loyal, but if you deceived him or did him harm (I can’t remember which) he cuts you out of his life.
Before he explained that he meant Teresa was right to split with Guidice, did you see how Teresa swallowed hard? I think she thought he meant if SHE was deceitful to him he’d cut her out. She does need to be careful. Melissa pointing out what having her back looks like – Dolores’ actions when Jennifer broke that glass, when T knows Dolores is not Melissa’s biggest fan!!!!
@Erica. I think a light bulb finally went on with Tre when Melissa explained the broken glass comment. Tre is finally realizing she needs Joe and Melissa more than they need her.
Did anyone catch Danielle’s face when Jennifer gave Tre that bracelet. LOL
Marge is the star of the show now IMO.
Glad it’s over but one of their better seasons.
Yup, when the father is gone, I think that Tre will find out she then has even less power. I think that Melissa and Joe Gorga have been tolerating a lot for the sake of Joe’s relationship with his father and his love for those girls. Frankly, I sometimes think those girls may be the only reason for them, down deep. But honestly? the people that Melania is now hanging with in hopes of that rap career AND her continued behaviors? I’m not sure they would want to encourage Antonia to spend even more time with Melania. You don’t see Antonia doing the nails, etc.The Gorga kids are boisterous and sometimes sassy, but they get called out on backchatting and their parents, unlike the Guidices, appear to mean business when they do say it.
“Don’t prostitutes sleep with married men?” Game, set, match goes to Marge. Bye Danielle.
The only thing that was redeeming from Part 3 was when Marge went off on Danielle and put her in her place. Loved it so much I kept rewinding that part. Match goes to Marge.
I thought the gift was a wagon that’s a luxury car, it had a handle…
ANYWAYS, Danielle looked so swanky as always, but last night, that hair, and new face just made her look over done, like a lion, TERRIBLE, she can add 21st surgery to her resume as well as engagements.
I am from NO, and I gotta say, Jackie is a breath of fresh air. I like that she holds her ground against the fraudulent LIAR, THIEF, CON ARTIST, DEMUSIONAL TERESA!! Someone needed to be on Melissa’s side for once.
Jennifer, WE GET IT, YOUR BROTHERS A JEWELER!!!
Hopefully this is it for them, I don’t think I can watch them anymore, especially if Danielle is in the mix, might tv screen may crack from her & Teresa’s screeching voices!!!
*NJ, not NO, stupid autocorrect doesn’t recognize my state! lol
The best part of the reunion was Andy asking if Teresa’s present was Caroline. THE SHADE.
That was priceless. I’d love for Teresa to go and Caroline to “replace” her.
Me too!
I enjoyed watching Margaret slay Danielle.
Poor Beverly isn’t fast enough or smart enough. Margaret has a true Jersey girl mouth. It was awesome and notice Beverly didn’t deny the prostitute sleeping with married men snark. She just shut her mouth because Marge shut her down. Boom.
I just came to say that Danielle looked like that Momo character scaring the kids on YouTube last night.
Lol Kimberly Wright, I tried to “Like” your Mono Danielle face post!
Not a popular opinion but Melissa and Joe are just too camera thirsty to watch. I’d like this cast without them.Marge Jr needs to get a refund on whatever work she had done,
. Or fire the make up artist. Or both.
Sorry not sorry but that bracelet was butt ugly. The thought was nice and so was the picture but it would have been better in a locket. Also what was up with all the ass kissing gifts to Teresa?! Were they trying to give the gifts so they can stay on the show?! I liked the (STRONG) necklace way better. Danielle needs to lay off the fillers and botox, she is starting to look like Madame the puppet.
HaHaHaHaHa!! That’s it………”Madame the Puppet”. Spot on! LMAO
Joe Gorga said he had a conversation with his kids about what they would want to do as a family, should they ever be in Teresa’s situation. Antonia said she’d follow him anywhere. Could Gorga be nervous that his business dealings will be investigated too? And I like Margaret, but the way she and her husband joke and brush off their affair as if it was destiny, is gross and inconsiderate of all the people they hurt along the way.
I totally agree. It is almost as if they are bragging about it, without any remorse for the hurt that they caused the children involved. Doesn’t Margaret have a biological son with her ex that is still younger than the adult children? Their behavior and comments can’t be easy on him.
Just got around to watching this. I have really enjoyed this season and I like having the husbands on. I think it adds to the authentici ty of the story lines and real family dynamics, reminds me of some of my Italian relatives. I am so over the made up BS and ganging up like RHBH with no real personal substance which is why I am beginning to hate and will probably stop watching the stunted High Schooler antics.
I am from South Jersey. These “ladies” do not represent us. North and South Jersey are pretty much two different states, IMO. I do love Marge though.
I bet if Bravo offered Teresa a show about moving to Italy, she’d be gone in a hot second.
For sure she would—unless she already pitched the idea;)
Teresa Vile as she is may not be able to move to Italy even if she wanted to. She is a convicted felon and Italy is one of those places that is a bit more selective about who immigrates there. Remember T is not an Italian citizen having been born here…Joe was born there which is why we will hopefully boot his sorry ass out of here. I don’t believe for a second that her girls do not speak Italian…it is just not a publicized thing. It is just easier for her to use the excuse of the girls than admit the humiliation that Italy does not want her. Plus, it looks she has a stupid young side piece.
If this show is headed to the Teresa and Melissa family feud again, I am out. I can’t watch season after season of Teresa and Melissa battling and it looks like that is where it is headed. I think that Teresa has a deep down hatred of Melissa that she just can’t cover up anymore nor do I think she wants to. IMHO Teresa enjoys ripping into Melissa and her perceived shortcomings. I would rather watch Siggy cry every episode than to see the venom Teresa shovels Melissa’s way.