Below Deck has at least one episode that was the highest rated show on cable and higher than the episode of RHOA that ran that same week. So why are we still shoving this big cast into the stupid clubhouse instead of having the reunion in Fort Lauderdale or Miami? I just don’t get it.
Meanwhile, someone may be breaking into the house next door and I am not sure whether to waste one of my 911 calls on calling the police. Sigh. Just another night in the ghetto. I hope for their sake they don’t step foot on my property because I will go all David Eason on their ass.
I wonder who gives the yachts these strange TV names. My Seanna was such a dumb choice. Andy introduces everyone and tells us that Caroline and Chandler will not be joining them tonight. I haven’t checked in on Caroline and her crazy lately but if she is still on Twitter I can only imagine what is happening right now.
Andy asks if the bromance is still on with Ashton and Ross. Ashton says yes and he is just like a girlfriend if he doesn’t check in with Ross everyday he gets upset. Andy goes straight to Ross’s arrest. Wow, way to ease them into the deep end, Andrew. He says it was just him and a couple of mates having a guys night out. He can’t really discuss it except to say it was just a big misunderstanding. “It always is,” sez Andy.
Kate was asked if Crystal was her worst charter guest of the season. Kate said she was the worst guest of her entire life. Andy points out that when Ross did the show, Crystal was his date to the clubhouse. Ross says they hang out from time to time. Andy asks if they are friends with benefits. He says he would not say that…. Kate interrupts, “Just benefits?” “Just benefits,” Ross agrees. Andy inquires about Crystal being married. Ross says she is not married as far as she knows. Kate’s face is priceless with that lie.
It’s time to address all the third stew drama. Ashton and Rhylee both say that Caroline was having a lot of difficulty coping with the day to day stress of being on the boat. Andy says he talked to Caroline the day of filming and she pointed out that there has been a long string of stews that has not gotten along with Kate. That’s true. Kate’s a bitch and always has someone to pick on every season and usually it is the third stew. It’s like some sort of mean girl initiation with her. HOWEVER, this season Kate was…dare I say it?…. NICE. She was extremely accommodating of Caroline’s crazy in ways I have never seen Kate show kindness before! Her whole “I was tortured by mean Kate” defense of her crazy doesn’t fly. Not this season.
Laura tries to stick up for Caroline a bit. She says she felt bad for her watching the show. Captain Lee shines Kate’s halo and Banjo has the same reaction I do. He throws up on my brand new area rug. This episode has more interrupts than a cell phone call in the Rocky Mountains.
Caroline swears that the scene with the music blaring and Josiah or whoever it was tormenting her that was shown on TV was nothing like what they actually did to her. She points out if they were blaring music outside her door she could have easily opened the door and shut it off. But wasn’t that exactly what they were trying to provoke her to do? To leave her quarters and get to work?
Kate says that Caroline has a flair for the dramatic and that is an understatement when it comes to Caroline’s Twitter behavior. I was actually on Caroline’s side at first when she came out guns blaring on Twitter but it didn’t take long to realize that she is mentally ill and for that reason I stopped discussing her.
Andy plays a clip of Kate and Josiah’s nasty behavior where they are outside the door of Caroline’s quarters claiming she has herpes that has flared up and other infectious diseases. It’s really disgusting to watch again. Kate defends herself by saying that Caroline started it and Caroline is the bully. Now there is the real Kate we usually see. Where has she been? Captain Lee refuses to even come close to saying that Kate and Josiah’s horrific behavior was wrong. This annoys me to no end about Captain Lee.
Andy finally gets Kate to say she regrets her behavior. Ashton piles on the whole She Started It bandwagon. Captain Lee would not accept that kind of excuse from his children growing up, I don’t know why it is acceptable from two grown adults. The should both have said their behavior was disgusting and they were embarrassed to see themselves behave that way they regret their behavior. She started it, is unacceptable. Even Andy seems to understand it. A viewer says that in light of Josiah talking about the pain he experienced being bullied, how did he feel comfortable bullying Caroline? Again with the she started it but he at least prefaced it with saying he regrets his behavior before saying, but she started it.
Andy asks Captain Lee if now that he has seen Kate’s bad behavior if he feels better about questioning her on the boat. Boy he can wiggle out of a question. It seemed he was saying he regrets questioning Kate’s role in the situation and ends by saying he could have handled it better. Kate and Josiah are both reasonably intelligent people and should have sussed out that Caroline had some psychiatric issues and needed to go home well before the terrorist tactics were used on her.
On to Laura and her bad behavior. Laura says she regrets her initial behavior when she first came on the ship. She never intended to come off the way she did. Captain Lee said if he had seen that, he would have fired her on the spot. I was surprised he didn’t and Laura has Kate to thank for that because she didn’t really give Captain Lee the full picture. Laura seem to be defending the behavior she just basically said she regretted and was embarrassed by. In the end they both are still open to working together.
Hang on I think Banjo is outside barking at the burglars. I’m back. Is it a full moon? The ghetto isn’t usually so rowdy at this time of night.
The hot seat moves over to Chef Adrian. In the bottom of the screen as Chef Adrian’s sexual jokes are played they show him in a tiny box laughing and then there is Captain Lee in the tiny box. I am half blind and can barely see him but he looks ready to beat the crap out of someone. This should be interesting.
A viewer asked why no one on the crew said anything about the sexual harassment. Kate jumps in to defend Adrian and say that he’s from Saint Martin and things are different there and Laura is from Canada where things are more ….conservative. Adrian blames editing. He says they didn’t show the dozens of fun conversations they had every day and the close relationship they had. Laura agrees and says it was easy to brush off. Alrighty then. Ross said if Laura was uncomfortable she should have addressed that situation straight away and not waited until they were leaving the boat. While I agree that I would have handled it the first or third time it happened, I understand why a young lady may not want to address it until she had an exit route because many times addressing the harasser will simply anger them and cause a whole new set of problems on a boat she could not get off of. So maybe Ross should have just kept his mouth shut like Captain Lee did. Andy points out that it is a work place and Adrian out ranked her. Andy Cohen is the voice of reason? This is shocking. Captain Lee just sits there looking irritated. He HATES reunions with a passion. That was probably the face I saw in the tiny box and nothing to do with the topic.
Captain Lee talks about Chandler’s firing. He says he was just overwhelmed by the responsibility of such a large boat. Ross agrees. Rhylee said it was more than his lack of management skills when it comes to her. She points out that Chandler was very rude and dismissive toward Rhylee. Ross and Adrian both have been in contact with Chandler and like him. Rhylee talks about how dismissive Chandler was toward her and the cameras go to Captain Lee staring at the ceiling thinking about sailing the seas far, far, away from this rinkydink set. He’s pretty dismissive of Rhylee himself.At another point in Rhylee’s time to speak Captain Lee is laughing and Ross and Ashton both seem dismissive and annoyed. It irritates me and I’m not Rhylee.
We come back from a break and we get the hot-tempered female deckhand reel. What they didn’t show are the behaviors by the other deckhands that caused her to speak up for herself. Rhylee has a temper, yes, but she begged the whole season to be taught how to do the things the guys were doing. They treated her like the dumb kid sister that the parents made them bring on the boat rather than and equal and that infuriated the fuck out of her and that fury escalated for the entire charter because she kept hoping that eventually there would be some sort of rhythm where she got to learn some skills beyond cleaning up the storage area and that never really happened.
Captain Lee is asked if he regrets not firing Rhylee after he saw her interaction with her superiors on the show. He says no. He says Chandler was basically a condescending prick. He says Ross should could have been a bit more firm. Rhylee says that Ross was a great bosun and she regrets her behaviors with him.
The common denominator of most of the hookups was Rhylee. Andy wants the current status of all the hookups. He starts with Ashton and Laura, Laura touches Ashton’s knee and says, “We’re dear friends.” Tyler grins at Rhylee and jokes “we’re dear friends” and Rhylee cracks up. Andy asks if Ashton and Laura are going to hook up after the reunion. Laura replies, “We’re dear friends.” And the both giggle. Andy turns to Rhylee to ask if they will get it on after the show and she says, “We’re dear Friends.” Tyler says they are going clubbing. The other deck hands laugh and ask them what they were doing last night. Clearly, they were hooking up. I wish one of them would ask Andy who he is fucking after the show and who he was with the night before. Why does he think it is normal to ask these questions? Laura tries to stop Ashton for admitting they hooked up on the boat at the end of the cruise before they went on their little honeymoon trip.
Kate said on the After Show of one of the episodes that Ross tried to kiss her. Kate says that Ross was drunk and she doesn’t think he had any idea who she was. Ross admits he gets a bit too lovey dovey when he drinks. Don’t we all, Ross. Don’t we all. Thank God we don’t have to have Andy Cohen interrogate us about our every drunken encounter. Ross admits he hooked up with Hannah. He thinks. He was drunk.
Andy begins a conversation with Rhylee and Tyler about their great chemistry. What kind of chemistry is Andy under for this show? Tyler responds to his questions by saying “her eyes” while making hand gestures simulating her breasts. Adrian is currently single and not in an open relationship.
Everyone tells their biggest regret and Josiah and Kate both say the way they dealt with Caroline at the end of her time there. They both seem now to be genuinely remorseful. Wow! Ashton is working for a family in Atlanta doing private training and security and managing the estate. My first thought was Cardi B and Offset. But honestly there are so many wealthy people here it could be any of several hundred families. Captain Lee says that his biggest regret was the way he handled the situation with Kate and Caroline. But I feel like he means he would have fired her sooner which would probably have been the best thing for Caroline. They need to do better with the psychological backgrounds on some of these people.
At the end of the show they brought out the cameraman who saved Ashton’s life. Ashton says he is his real life hero and he hopes he could do something with his life that will make Brent proud. Brent wants us to know that he did not do what he did all by himself. Rhylee was the first person to quickly call for help and without her quick, calm thinking Ashton would not have made it. Captain Lee took the boat out of gear. Ross helped with tying the lines. Captain Lee cannot handle this entire conversation. It’s a very painful subject for him and it is written all over his face. Brent goes into lots of detail and everyone is getting very emotional. Captain Lee pipes up to say if Rhylee had not said man overboard when she did, it would have been all over. Captain Lee says it was the worst thing that has happened in his 35 years. Andy asks Captain Lee what he wants to say to Brent. He says he has said it before to him, he’s a stud. Brent says Captain Lee is the real stud of the sea. Captain Lee gets up and hugs him and now I am emotional.
And thus ends the best Below Deck Season ever.