I recently saw a few interviews from Jackie where she says she wants the show to move along a few episodes to get the heat off her back. She said that the article was complimentary (and it actually was if you read it) and that there are many more things to be distressed about in the future than her little article. I’m still Team Jackie this season. Meanwhile, Dolores is going to do some sort of charity event on this episode and have lots of positive response from “the normals” a term used to describe people who just watch the show and don’t obsessive about all the backstory and truths like um, well… we do.
I wonder who had to explain to Teresa what her tagline meant?
Jennifer is leaving the kids with her husband to go to Turkey for her brother’s arranged marriage. Jennifer shows her husband Jackie’s article and he says there is nothing wrong with it. And goes on to say she has valid points. BECAUSE HE ACTUALLY READ THE ARTICLE. I don’t think Jennifer ever did.
“But she is referencing our kids!” cries Jennifer. I love Bill. He may be my favorite husband in NJ.
Frankie needs to flee his family and go into a witness protection program.
Jackie and Teresa have a sitdown at a coffee shop. Jackie is pretty good at handling Teresa and making it clear that she is not the one for Teresa to come after. Jackie also apologized for hurting Teresa’s one feeling. Jackie is so much smarter than Teresa that this cannot possibly end well for Teresa.
Teresa goes to work out with Frank. Why? Because they are getting a promotional for the gym. Frank recommended her real coach but she lives quite the distance away. Frankie has his first competition the same day as Teresa. Frankie works her ass off. Teresa says she has not told Joe about him working her out but he would probably be fine with it because it’s Frank. Good ole Frank the disbarred lawyer. Frank tells Teresa she needs to lose 12 more pounds in the three weeks before the competition. Jesus! That is a lot. I must say that I admire Teresa’s focus.
OMG! We are filming Jennifer in Turkey! This made my night! I didn’t expect this. I love Turkey so much! I want to see everything! She says that her parents immigrated from Turkey for a better life. Perhaps at the time, but there is a vibrant culture and Turkey and the turmoil sort of comes and goes. Right now things are pretty good. I mean the US doesn’t even have a stable government at the moment so the Turks are probably better off. Her family seems to be living high on the hog in a lovely apartment.
I love hearing the sounds of happy ululation from the bride to be to her husband when they meet at the airport. My mother could do that when we went to a Libyan wedding. I sadly cannot. I can’t roll my Rs either. I am defective.
Last week it was Joey Gorga’s communion and this week is his birthday so Melissa and Joe take him to The Sugar Factory for a paid promotional event. Joe makes negative comments about Melissa’s Boutique after Antonia says she wants to own a boutique like her mother.
I want that t-shirt Melissa is wearing with the eyeball. I like the neckline and I am obsessed with finding the perfect gray t-shirt. I have quite a few, but have not found the perfect one yet. Marge shares with Melissa and Jackie some bizarre texts from Danielle. Marge responded by asking her to never speak to her again.
It’s time for Dolores to pretend she is putting on a charity event that Bravo is paying for. BTW that whole PRIV makeup company was purchased by Bravo/NBCu. Jackie says there are two sides to Dolores and this is her good one. Marge brings gift baskets. Melissa brings gift bags of toiletries. Melissa holds a cute baby so the mom can get spa treatments. Marge says lots of bad things about Jennifer’s (I wonder what her real name is?) brother’s arranged marriage. I am all for them myself.
My heart flutters when I see Istanbul. I really need to go back there. Or maybe I will retire in Dubai with Lindsay Lohan. I’d love to live next to a mosque again. Jennifer is very confused if she thinks that Turks are “the only middle eastern culture” that “does the chanting” it’s ululation and the Libyans do it better. 🙂 Despite all the misinformation, I LOVED seeing Istanbul.
Jennifer and Dolores come to Teresa’s house to plot as there are clearly two teams at this point in the season and this is Teresa’s squad. Teresa’s dad is there and he looks pretty good in this scene like he is feeling much better. Teresa tells Jennifer that Marge called the arranged marriage a “mail order bride.” Jennifer is still mad at Jackie. Dolores sets up “the team” for this season. Teresa’s team is apparently “Team Old School Values.” I should point out that Teresa has added so many … what’s the term…? Objects D’Art? There is so much new fancy crap in her house that there is hardly room to walk. She is totally wasting that mattress money. Seriously. The shit in this house that she apparently paid off is INSANE. I would not be surprised if she ends up in prison again. She spending money like it is going out of style. How does the IRS not see this?
Jennifer says she is coming for Jackie at the next event.
Next week: Bravo capitalizes on the demise of a twelve-year-old child who is being sexualized and offered up to rappers. It is horrific and despicable and the lowest this show has ever gone. Jennifer tries to come for Jackie (gurl, please) and then tries to come for Marge (gurl, really?) Danielle returns looking like a castoff Brat doll.