Love After Lockup: Secrets And Cellmates

Megan, Michael & Sarah

Michael continues to be torn between his baby mama and his bride to be. First, he takes his bride to visit his mama. She is aware that Michael has another “queen.” In fact she facetimes with Megan while Sarah takes Michael’s sister to pick up her boyfriend. Michael nonchalantly says he is riding with Sarah to New York to check in with his parole officer. She asks if Sarah is there and he says no, but that is technically true, she just left with his sister. Megan is not sure she can trust Michael. You think? But the next time we see her, she has rationalized the entire thing.

Michael makes it clear to us that Megan is “his queen” and he is only screwing Sarah, his wife, so she won’t run off their kid. That’s noble right? Michael leaves Sarah in tears to go off with his boyzzzzz on the first day he is out of prison. Such a charmer this one is. 

Matt & Caitlin 

These to are headed to move in with his mommy after having sex on the side of the road. Matt proposed to Caitlin with a dandelion. Matt is pissed that Caitlin is BFFs with his mom behind his back. Matt’s mom is so happy to see him while at the same time wondering how long until he goes back. Matt shares his long, long, list of prior incarcerations. Matt is already looking around for meth. It’s day two and Matt already feels trapped and antsy.

Lizzie & Scott

At the hotel in Michigan where Scott is supposed to be buying a house for Lizzie, Lizzie sends Scott’s son Adam and her daughter Lizzie to go play in traffic while she gets Scott all worked up to where he will give her more money. Last I heard she is refusing to sleep with him. Oh wait, she’s not even stripping or something for him. She’s going to give him a makeover. She got a couple of cosmetology classes in during her prison stint before she got expelled for doing heroin. That seems like plenty of qualification to me. She cuts off his long hair like a five year old. This is going to be a hot mess. Then she shears him like a sheep. Lizzie says she doesn’t like needy men. Then she slices him up with a straight razor and then she screwed up his mustache and cuts it off completely. The moral of the story is if you are high on heroin during prison cosmetology you should probably just take your man to a barber. Then she gives him a kissing lesson.

As Lizzie and Scott prepare to go on their first date, both of their kids try to dissuade their parents from this horrible pairing.

Brittany & Marcelino

It’s unclear whether or not Marcelino has been told that Brittany’s prison bunkie, Sasha, who has also been released was her prison girlfriend.  Well guess who is coming to brunch, Marcelino? And she is late which has pissed Marcelino off already. Marcelino’s second issue with Sasha is that Brittany isn’t supposed to associate with other felons. Marcelino is really coming for Sasha in a very aggressive manner. Brittany tells us she has been homeless on the streets since she was twelve. Brittany is very well put together and seems to want to be just friends with Brittany. However, there is another ex prison girlfriend, Amanda who is also out and living nearby who likely does want a relationship with Brittany.

Tracie & Clint

These two are going out for dinner where Clint plans to propose and have sex before getting married tomorrow. He lives in New Mexico with his parents and she is from Texas. They need to figure out where to live. He wants to move her in with his parents. She just wants a baby. And for him to get rid of his stick shift Camaro. Clint is super nervous about proposing. Is she not aware they are supposed to get married the next day? She says yes and gives her the ring. The bar applauds.

Tracie is very sexually aggressive. She’s clearly worked in a brothel before.

And we are still on DAY ONE of the prison release for most of these couples!