Atlanta is not the only franchise with a drop in ratings. New Jersey is barely holding on to a million viewers a week with ratings ranging from .92 to 1.18. I think viewers are finally getting bored with #FelonsByBravo. Tonight, before the wedding even happens, it will become very obvious that this marriage is doomed. Danielle has been making all sorts of outlandish claims against her soon to be ex-husband in court. They are all blatant lies. It’s scary how insane Danielle really is.
I don’t even remember the last episode of this show. I am just ready for this sham of a wedding to be over. Marge and her husband and Melissa and Joe both have individual conversations about how Danielle talks about Marty’s kids. Teresa facetimes with Dolores about the kid issue as well.
The bridesmaids are all going to do “Bride Squad” photo shoot on the beach. Four of the bride’s maids are not there for the photo. Marge doesn’t want to take off her lacy coverups. The late four bridesmaids eventually show up. Who needs seven bridesmaids in your forties?
Melissa likes Jackie and Teresa can’t stand her so this will be a problem.
The two Joes take Marty out for drinks. Apparently, Danielle would not let Marty have a bachelor party. Joe Gorga tells him he is pussy-whipped already. And it seems that she is not giving up the pussy at all. The Joes tell him he needs to really be sure about this wedding. They are really trying to talk him out of this. He should have listened. Their delivery sucked though. They were sort of mean to him. But they were right.
Back in Jersey, Jackie and Dolores go out to lunch so that Jackie can get some advice on how to deal with Teresa. Dolores tells Jackie that what she said was very offensive. Jackie then goes on to say that Teresa’s over the top screaming is not the way intelligent people behave. Dolores tries to defend Teresa’s intelligence, but come on, the woman is dumber than a box of rocks. Jackie shares that both of her parents were convicts. Her father went to prison and her mother was on house arrest for tax evasion and fraud. This conversation is not going well. Jackie needs to stay away from Dolores. She’s bad news.
Joe Gorga is literally falling down drunk alone in the hotel room when Melissa and Teresa show up. Marge shows up to her room to find her husband drunk as well. Both Joe’s explain that they told Marty he was making a mistake. Marty threw a drink on Marge’s Joe.
The most interesting thing that happened this episode is that my remote stopped working.
Jennifer’s family owns a jewelry store. This whole scene is sort of cringey.
It’s time for the engagement dinner. No one really wants to go. Margaret points out it is supposed to rain the next day which is the wedding day. It begins to rain on the tram ride over. Danielle basically blames Marge for making it rain on her wedding day. Marge Sr. is there! We know this because she just face planted at the bar.
Danielle is in full on bitch mode and comes for Joe Gorga for the conversation he had with Marty earlier in the day. Joe Gorga wants to pull in the other Joe. He is not taking the brunt of it all by himself. Apparently, Marty has a black Amex and the Joes told him that Danielle was just after him for his money. Now Danielle is blaming Marge for the guys conversations.
Danielle has a glam squad to blow out the bridesmaids hair and do their makeup. Everyone was invited to partake. But then Danielle acts like the glam squad is only for her and her two daughters and seems angry when Melissa and Teresa show up to get ready. She’s just such a bitch. Also there have been several conversations about Danielle not having sex with Marty. Yet in Danielle’s most recent bizarre court filing she says Marty forced her to have sex all the time. Everything she says was so batshit crazy as to not be believable at all. Danielle continues to attack Marge. Marge even blew out her own hair! Eventually, Marge has had enough and wants to go home and skip the wedding. Danielle apologies to Marge and she decides to stick it out. Marge regrets not listening to Dolores about Danielle.
Where did they get all of these people to fill the wedding chairs? It’s time for the wedding and I suddenly realize there is going to be a whole nuther episode of wedding drama.
Danielle’s two daughters walk her down the aisle. Her dress, which apparently she put on Marty’s black card to the tune of $45K is beautiful. I am not sure I believe that though. They did make it to the altar and it looks like we are done with the wedding stuff and headed back to Jersey next week.
This show is sad.
I agree. They’re all getting pretty sad. The only one I’ve been “into” this year is VPR and it’s only because I want to see happy people, and so far Stassi and Brittany seem happy.
I’ve stopped watching all Housewives after the last season of NY. I will read the full recaps here if the epi sounds interesting, which they don’t. And that’s not shade to Tamara. I think I’m just over all these women. Well. I saw the preview for BH which has some promise. But not holding my breath.
Happy new year all!
I can’t believe that prostitution whore fooled ANY guy for long enough to walk down the aisle. Especially if she isn’t blowing him.
I agree. Danielle is a nasty mean self center evil female. Possibly when she was younger and having her daughters she was softer but those days are long gone.
She can act differently, nice normal, for a short time, long enough to get a man or make new friends but can not keep her “all about me” attitude in check for very long.
I’ve never thought she changed, if anything became more devious. Marty is lucky he got out in one piece.
Thanks for your time recapping this show, TT!
I know I’m over this show because we already know Danielle’s marriage is over before we see the wedding so why waste my time watching the drama, a cheating scandal that has already been in the news (on another show that starts with a K), etc. I love Marge, Jackie and Melissa. I also enjoy Jennifer’s over-the-top extravagance. Dolores and Teresa can kick rocks. I could care less about them.
I’m with you on Teresa and Dolores! They are bringing the whole show down.
Danielle is so self destructive. Here at 56 she marries a nice, financially comfortable guy and blows it. Tre making excuses for her is pathetic. Why doesn’t Bravo realize the OG’s are bringing these shows down; with the exception of NY?
Seems all the OG’s except NY are bringing down these shows. Tre making excuses for Danielle is pathetic. Dolores is a bore.
I guess my taste really sucks. I watched the previously aired episode and really liked it Maybe that was a one hit wonder?
I’m not gonna lie though, I had some pretty freaky nightmares after watching it. All these women are SCARY!
The best scene of this episode was when Joe and Joe were telling Marty that he is pussy whipped. That was pure comedy!
Pussy whipped and apparently isn’t getting any pussy. That must be the worst.
That’s what Marty is really mad about. All the money he spent and he’s still not getting laid.
Both the Joes are pussy whipped, so it takes one to know one. Marge was being a witch. She was being a Debbie downer. Crazy people need love too. Marge is jealous that crazy Danielle landed a man with some major coinage and Marge married the contractor and he won’t even finish the renovations in her house. I guess he retired once he married his sugar mama. Apparently Daneille was giving Marty crazy sex in the previous season. Isnt he the one she sexed in the bathroom at some filming function?
What show were you watching? Is it Opposite Day or something ?
It’s bizarro world.
Hi Danielle!
You took the words from my mouth
Hi!
Hi Danielle. You should really be seeing a therapist. You need psychiatric hellp
I loved every scene with Joe and Joe. Joe Gorga telling Marty and Danielle they weren’t telling Marty to run cutting to the talking head of Joe laughing and saying that is exactly what they were saying … to Joe Gorga falling into the hotel room … to Marge’s Joe laughing about telling Marty not to marry Danielle as Marge is horrified. That scene of them going on and on with 101 reasons not to marry Danielle saved the show. I’m watching again. Absolutely loved it.
Does anyone know what Jackie’s parents were convicted of?
I thought she said tax evasion.
Ha! Danielle is in her fifties with seven bridesmaids!
I don’t think I could find 7 bridesmaids and I just turned 37! It’s always the crazies. Of course I’ll also never have a wedding by bravo or marry/become a felon by bravo. Haha
I was completely fixated during the “conversation” between Dolores and Jackie and the number of times that Dolores’s necklace appeared and disappeared.
Do bravo shoes every win awards for editing???That drives me nuts! I remember at the You went to Bass Lake lunch grestchen’s bangs kept flipping sides and Courtney Kerr’s shownher fingernail polish changed!
I remember the fingernail polish switch too. Just curious—-have you seen what Courtney K looks like these days? She had some work done and I couldn’t even recognize her. Unreal. And she was so cute too !!!
I haven’t watched yet but will be looking for this bit!
So glad you saw it too. Hubby walked in the room and I made him watch the jewelry disappear and reappear over and over. Makes me realize they edit the heck out of scenes. No really edit 5hen refill….crazy editing. So much editing that it changes the real intent of what truly happened.
Yes, I saw that too!
I am now going to watch on DVR. I always enjoy reading your recap before viewing! Turkey in the oven for New Years Eve gathering. Hope all of you have a great New Years 2019 !
Epic fail on Bravo’s part for bringing Danielle back. Please start over and recast show.
I never did understand why there were fans clamoring for her return. Yes, she brings drama, but she is also a creepy sociopath.
Clearly Marge was told by production to be Danielle’s friend this season, and Danielle delighted in repeatedly crapping on her. It was so uncomfortable to watch this abuse. Each time Marge stood up for herself and walked away, I cheered, but then Danielle pulled out the manipulative tears and hugs – ewwww. And that whole thing about telling the women to come to her room for hair and make up services, only to have the rug yanked out from under them – that was Danielle setting them up, and it made her look like a complete asshole.
This entire show needs to be recast or bring back Jacqueline , Caroline & Kathy. Don’t hate me
I am glad for the recap TT, thanks again for taking one for the team! I’m just going to delete this one from the DVR, this episode sounds horrible. I can’t believe the level of nastiness from Danielle regarding Marty’s kids. Why on Earth did he marry her?! even as brief as it was?! So glad he’s left her now.
I thought that photo was of Melissa and Ramona!
I cannot believe I was actually ready to give Danielle another chance!! (I sound like Teresa) or however she spells her name. What a see you next Tuesday. Unbelievable. But her fiancé is just stoopid. Stoopid. I don’t care if Melissa and Teresa are friends, make up, get along or kill each other anymore. I would watch a show based solely on “The Marge” in a New York minute. Just horrible. The idea about NOT registering and having guests donate to charity was a great performance. But no!! It’s all about her!! As much as I killed myself making sure I had good practical gifts for my children and grandchildren, was actually surprised when I received Christmas gifts. I mean of course they did, it just wasn’t anything I was focused on. To see their little faces was everything and due to a very unexpected $ gift from a friend was actually able to focus on enjoying that and not stressing on “Am I going to have my rent, insurance, phone cable bill money etc. ?” You can truly tell only 2 possibly 3 have any sort of integrity or self-awareness. I REALLY like Marge and Jackie. And Delores. Maybe. Oy, TT-what fresh hell has this entire franchise become?? WTF is happening?
Great performance?? I meant idea!!
I get a “Dirty John” vibe from Danielle, they could flip that script and make it a “Dirty Danielle” episode instead. She is scurrrry!
What a great idea! Bravo should do a show on all the Danielle exes and their stories. Now that would be entertaining!
That’s the only thing I would watch with her name attached to it.
I’m watching today. I’ll report back! Happy New Year Tamara!!!
Why in the world can Delores NOT show her boobs. It is horrible!
Teresa and Melissa still going at each other is BORING. Teresa still acts like a pit bull when she should be a scared house cat, given all of her felony shenanigans. Danielle is so crazy looking and acting, but it’s hard to turn away. Lastly, when Dolores comes to the screen, I mute it all. She’s so blind to Teresa’s crazy, it’s upsetting. She has no story line, so I guess being Teresa’s bottom bitch is her gig.
The way Teresa looks at her brother Joe when they are getting along is kind of creepy. Like she wishes he was her husband instead of her brother. Perhaps that is why she has this underlying dislike for Melissa. I used to think it was because she was jealous of Melissa being younger. Now I am thinking it is about her brother paying attention to his wife rather than her. The way she was looking at him with adoring eyes when they were working out together was too much beyond sibling love.
Did I miss the scene where Marge pushed Marty into the pool? Was it this episode? I did doze off a couple times, or left the room during a couple ofDanielle’s scenes.
I’m totally on board with what you just said about Tre and the way she looks at her brother! I always thought she was pissed at Melissa because if it came down to his sis or his wife..he would choose his wife! As he should! It IS a jealousy thing w/ Melissa. Her brother gives Mel the love and attention her Joe doesnt!! We all know men that love their wives don’t call them cunts.
When Melissa walks towards Joe Gorga if he is on the phone he probably says “Hang on a minute… my sexy wife just walked in. I’m a lucky guy. She gets my engine going.”
When Teresa walks towards Joe Guidice, she gets “Here comes my bitch wife. She is such a cunt.”
Yet, their parents have an issue with Melissa and their son. I don’t get that.
If I remember correctly, way back when, Teresa explained her family were friends with the Guidice family when they were growing up. She always had a crush on Joe and her family wasn’t happy about it. I think she continued to pursue him, so her family eventually gave up trying to keep them apart.
Okay. Doesn’t that Danielle have ANY other girlfriends? She’s been away from RHONJ for what? 8 years or so? And no other girlfriends in her wedding or as guests? I’m not surprised given how mean and creepy she is, but still. What’s up with the necklace seen and then unseen on Dolores? Whats that about? Honestly, the episode was repulsive other than Marge finally waking up.
She suffers from abandonment issues (probably borderline personality disorder as well). She brings people close, there’s a honeymoon period then she picks at them trying to make them leave. Subconsciously she believes they’ll leave anyway so this gives a false sense of controlling the narrative. It’s always black and white and when people finally leave they’re the enemy. It’s really hard to break this pattern without a lot of therapy and inner work. It’s hard to feel sorry for Danielle because she’s so unlikeable and without any self-insight. It’s been interesting watching this type of behavior unfold with her husband and especially Marge.
Off my soap box now! I’m on a, “Women behind bars” jag on this New Years Day. So much for my resolve to start watching shows that are uplifting and not depressing.
I’ll start tomorrow. I promise.
I’m totally on board with what you just said about Tre and the way she looks at her brother! I always thought she was pissed at Melissa because if it came down to his sis or his wife..he would choose his wife! As he should! It IS a jealousy thing w/ Melissa. Her brother gives Mel the love and attention her Joe doesnt!! We all know men that love their wives don’t call them cunts.
You would not have missed it. It was crazy. I should rewind but I swear even when she had the necklace on there were two different ones. Reality TV? I think not.