I deleted the first episode of the season because when I turned it on, Scott from last season was on there. Before the season because they ran these episodes focusing on one couple from the previous season which didn’t really have and new stuff on there so I thought it was one of those about Scott. As it turns out it was the first episode and Scott is on the second season as well.
This episode is insane. There is a guy named Michael who looks like some sort of gangbanger or perhaps and extremely rich rapper, it’s hard to tell these days. He has TWO women waiting for him when he gets out. His baby mama and some other lady who says she doesn’t expect to have to worry about the baby mamma. He’s running the same game on both of them. How the hell does he expect his release day to go down. Will they both be standing there waiting to see who he will run too?
One thing is for sure, Sarah who is white, is trying on wedding gowns. She is the baby mama and as it turns out they are already married in a prison ceremony! When she tells her friend he married her in prison her friend’s mind is blown. Especially since he cheated on Sarah multiple times together before he went to prison. HE IS CHEATING ON HER WHILE HE IS IN PRISON!
Megan is a black virgin who plans to give up her V card to Michael on their wedding night. And the title of this episodes apparently comes from her running up $12K in phone bills calling Michael in prison. Is that even possible? I mean I don’t have a cell phone, but I see ads on my TV all the time for $50 a month for unlimited usage. I’m so confused. They have only been “dating” a year and a half. Is there some sort of extra fee for prison calls? Oh it sounds like she is giving him money on his books to call her. So she has paid for Flaming Hot Cheetos and cigarettes for the entire unit for the past 18 months.
Then there is Marecellino who I think is kind of sweet. He is in love with Brittany who is a multiple felon about to be released. He drives to the prison to take her calls so he can be outside the building to be closer to her. It’s sweet to me in an adorable way until I find out he is 40 (he looks a lot younger) and should know better than this.
But the biggest person getting duped is a guy named, Clint. He is one of those people who um, well I want to say , errr Clint is on the low end of the IQ bell curve. Is that okay to still say? He has the IQ of the average redditor. He is 37 and his mother got him plane tickets to go pick up his prison bride for his birthday. She’s not thrilled about it buy she is part enabler and part helicopter mom. She’s also triple checked all of his hotel reservations and then hands him a credit card and explains he should not let Tracie who I forget why is in jail spend all the money. She should pay her own way. With what money? The six cents an hour she made in prison? Clint’s dad is polite when Clint shows him the one carat (total weight) diamond ring he over paid for. I think he is just hoping that Clint FINALLY leaves the nest.
Okay I just found out while pulling photos that this will be Clint’s THIRD marriage. I am shocked that he has left the nest before! He has not even spoken to her on the phone! They only interact through email!
Scott is still messing with Lizzie and she got out of jail this episode. Scott, his son, and Lizzie’s 19-year-old daughter who hasn’t seen her mother since she was eight go to pick her up. So those three are standing on the other side of the road from the prison entrance. Now who would you expect Lizzie to run to? Well if you said her ATM machine, you would be right. She not only ran to him but jumped up on him dropping him to the ground and kissing him. This episode ended with Scott having a bloodied lip and a missing dental bridge. Despite looking for it everywhere it was not found. Lizzie’s kid, the only one with any sense says he probably swallowed it. Hopefully it will pass he had just gotten it. Yet he did not bother to shave for the prison trip.
Only after the huge display with Scott which seemed to go on and on did she acknowledge her daughter. Not a tear was shed.
Caitlin is happy to be picking up her jailbird Matt. He is ready to be released but she seems to have to drive a very long way to get there. She has her BFF Kelly in the car. She has a prison boyfriend too but he still has five more years to serve or something. I really wasn’t paying recapping sort of attention to this show but I really needed someone to talk to about it. Kelly is also going to visit with her prison BAE who is at the same prison while on this trip from hell. Kelly is super aggressive with Caitlin because she is jealous she only had to wait five months to see her man. Caitlin drives from the hotel room to the prison alone. I am sure she is thrilled to be away from Kelly, but she is very nervous about picking up Matt. When she gets to the prison she is hysterically excited. She can hardly contain herself. Unfortunately, he is being “released to the community” and they will not tell her specifically where he will be released and they are throwing her off the prison grounds without letting her know where to pick him up. This seems very odd. Did someone else come get him? Caitlin is furious.
So I am pulling photos and apparently Caitlin’s mother kicked her out over the relationship so she move out to live with Matt’s mom! So surely she will be able to find him.
To be continued…