I deleted the first episode of the season because when I turned it on, Scott from last season was on there. Before the season because they ran these episodes focusing on one couple from the previous season which didn’t really have and new stuff on there so I thought it was one of those about Scott. As it turns out it was the first episode and Scott is on the second season as well.
This episode is insane. There is a guy named Michael who looks like some sort of gangbanger or perhaps and extremely rich rapper, it’s hard to tell these days. He has TWO women waiting for him when he gets out. His baby mama and some other lady who says she doesn’t expect to have to worry about the baby mamma. He’s running the same game on both of them. How the hell does he expect his release day to go down. Will they both be standing there waiting to see who he will run too?
One thing is for sure, Sarah who is white, is trying on wedding gowns. She is the baby mama and as it turns out they are already married in a prison ceremony! When she tells her friend he married her in prison her friend’s mind is blown. Especially since he cheated on Sarah multiple times together before he went to prison. HE IS CHEATING ON HER WHILE HE IS IN PRISON!
Megan is a black virgin who plans to give up her V card to Michael on their wedding night. And the title of this episodes apparently comes from her running up $12K in phone bills calling Michael in prison. Is that even possible? I mean I don’t have a cell phone, but I see ads on my TV all the time for $50 a month for unlimited usage. I’m so confused. They have only been “dating” a year and a half. Is there some sort of extra fee for prison calls? Oh it sounds like she is giving him money on his books to call her. So she has paid for Flaming Hot Cheetos and cigarettes for the entire unit for the past 18 months.
Then there is Marecellino who I think is kind of sweet. He is in love with Brittany who is a multiple felon about to be released. He drives to the prison to take her calls so he can be outside the building to be closer to her. It’s sweet to me in an adorable way until I find out he is 40 (he looks a lot younger) and should know better than this.
But the biggest person getting duped is a guy named, Clint. He is one of those people who um, well I want to say , errr Clint is on the low end of the IQ bell curve. Is that okay to still say? He has the IQ of the average redditor. He is 37 and his mother got him plane tickets to go pick up his prison bride for his birthday. She’s not thrilled about it buy she is part enabler and part helicopter mom. She’s also triple checked all of his hotel reservations and then hands him a credit card and explains he should not let Tracie who I forget why is in jail spend all the money. She should pay her own way. With what money? The six cents an hour she made in prison? Clint’s dad is polite when Clint shows him the one carat (total weight) diamond ring he over paid for. I think he is just hoping that Clint FINALLY leaves the nest.
Okay I just found out while pulling photos that this will be Clint’s THIRD marriage. I am shocked that he has left the nest before! He has not even spoken to her on the phone! They only interact through email!
Scott is still messing with Lizzie and she got out of jail this episode. Scott, his son, and Lizzie’s 19-year-old daughter who hasn’t seen her mother since she was eight go to pick her up. So those three are standing on the other side of the road from the prison entrance. Now who would you expect Lizzie to run to? Well if you said her ATM machine, you would be right. She not only ran to him but jumped up on him dropping him to the ground and kissing him. This episode ended with Scott having a bloodied lip and a missing dental bridge. Despite looking for it everywhere it was not found. Lizzie’s kid, the only one with any sense says he probably swallowed it. Hopefully it will pass he had just gotten it. Yet he did not bother to shave for the prison trip.
Only after the huge display with Scott which seemed to go on and on did she acknowledge her daughter. Not a tear was shed.
Caitlin is happy to be picking up her jailbird Matt. He is ready to be released but she seems to have to drive a very long way to get there. She has her BFF Kelly in the car. She has a prison boyfriend too but he still has five more years to serve or something. I really wasn’t paying recapping sort of attention to this show but I really needed someone to talk to about it. Kelly is also going to visit with her prison BAE who is at the same prison while on this trip from hell. Kelly is super aggressive with Caitlin because she is jealous she only had to wait five months to see her man. Caitlin drives from the hotel room to the prison alone. I am sure she is thrilled to be away from Kelly, but she is very nervous about picking up Matt. When she gets to the prison she is hysterically excited. She can hardly contain herself. Unfortunately, he is being “released to the community” and they will not tell her specifically where he will be released and they are throwing her off the prison grounds without letting her know where to pick him up. This seems very odd. Did someone else come get him? Caitlin is furious.
So I am pulling photos and apparently Caitlin’s mother kicked her out over the relationship so she move out to live with Matt’s mom! So surely she will be able to find him.
To be continued…
Thank you for recapping this show. What does it say about me that I love all these train wreck shows? Wait, don’t answer that.
How long till Lizzie finds her next sucker once she finds out Scott is out of money?
I kind of like those two shows best too. Although this season I think Below Deck is my favorite.
Scott is going to lose his house in all of this.
I just started watching LAL; I find it very entertaining.
This is one show that is almost too depressing to watch because you know that these people are going to be devastated and broke at the end of the relationship. Calls from prison must be either prepaid on a card the prisoner can buy or collect. They are very expensive, often six to seven dollars for a fifteen minute call. This show, like 90 Day Fiancé demonstrate how desperately lonely so many people are. And I agree, it was horrible watching the 19 year old daughter being ignored while the released woman was on top of her sugar daddy.
In the first episode we met one of Clint’s ex-wives. She seems kind of normal so I googled her to see why she married him. I didn’t find that answer but I did find that she also has an arrest record. Now I’m wondering if Clint met her the same way he met Tracey. It has nothing to do with the show but I also found that Clint was arrested for drunk driving after driving a truck pulling a Little Debbie trailer a mile or so across a field after going off the road. I laughed my ass off.
Lizzie’s jump into Scott’s arms was everything! Scott doesnt look healthy enough to do something that strenuous and he looked like he might have hurt his back. Poor Jazmine. I really do feel sorry for her.
Caitlin acts as if shes on something.
That or overacting.😳
Oh boy Lizzie, the way you swerved round your kid to your cash machine, ahem, bf, was slick. So disgusting, blood relation means nothing to this eternal scammer.
Geez Clint, did we need a Colt 2.0 with a mum that won’t let go? I have so many questions! Why was mum holding the ring? Who paid for the ring? Who’s credit card was handed to Clint? Why was mum using a checklist and not 37yo Clint?
When will these doofus-es (doof-i?) get it that a mumma’s boy is NOT attractive to the opposite sex?
Doof-i, I love it! Thanks for the big laugh!
Thank you so much for the recap (I’m in Australia). I am another of the (very few) who love these train wreck shows. This and 90 Day Fiancé are my favourites.
I feel so sad watching Caitlin. She’s gorgeous and making such an effort, she must be so damaged to be putting up with him.
Lizzie’s daughter deserves better, way better.
You are bang on. Seeing Lizzie run past her daughter as she did was nothing less than heartbreaking.
It’s mindboggling that Caitlyn is so invested in this Matt character.
It’s just hard to imagine that these people are so lacking in sense and self awareness. It doesn’t seem real. But…it is a wildly entertaining shitshow & a brilliant Friday evening guilty pleasure. The recaps are a much appreciated bonus🤗🤗
Did Lizzie even know that was her daughter?! She’s a vile woman.
It’s been a little over a decade now that I’ve been a solid citizen. Before that, I….was not. So yes, prison phone calls are CRAZY expensive. I made one local call a day, 5-10 minutes max. That was about $15 a day billed to the person who accepts the call. Once you fall afoul of the law, even for a non violent non drug crime (my entire rap sheet is 2 misdemeanors at the age of 43. Addiction.),its crazy expensive to get free and clear. My probation fees were almost $3K total. I’m lucky I was able to pay. For those who can’t, well, you do time. It’s a straight up hustle. I agree that consequences are important. But there should be some sense of proportion of the fine and the time in light of the crime. There are worse places than where I was locked up by far. This is how people stay in trouble and stay poor.
I was watching a segment on Vice News the other night and there is some sort of citizens group that is paying the bail to get the poor people out of jail. And the police/jail people were pissed about it. They were also trying to help with all the huge fees they have to pay once they get out. There was something about them not being able to… vote? or maybe it was get a driver’s license? Until the debt was paid off. Yeah, I think they couldn’t get jobs because they couldn’t drive to work. It seemed like a really fucked up situation. And the fees owed were enormous. Who gets those?
Many years ago when I lived in Tallahassee a friend of mine got arrested for DUI. She was locked up for a couple of days and called me collect ALL DAY LONG. It was expensive, but I don’t think they do that anymore. At least now I thought the person in jail had to have money on their books for phone cards. The one girl was probably paying for the phone calls to the other girls too.
On 60 days in the phone calls often started with “will you accept a collect phone call from prisoner number…” Unless those recorded calls were dubbed in later I believe that they still do collect calls.
Me too…✋🏻…I love the trainwreck shows! The 2 timing felon reeled me in! And Coltie 2.0…That poor ole Scott is broke, Lizzie will probably leave him when she finds that out. Smart move to make a little intrigue! I’ll pretend it’s 60 days in!
My boss and I do imitations of her ending words with ie. He is the one that got me hooked on reality tv. We watch it while we work. You would be amazed at how much work we can get done while watching tv at the same time. Now I can’t work without the TV on because of reality show addiction and it’s too quiet.
I am addicted to the TV. It never goes off even when I am sleeping. If it goes out for ten minutes, I am beside myself.
Thank you for the recap. I can’t help myself, I love this show.
As for the virgin waiting to give it up to the con, I feel the worst for her parents. Her Dad seems like good people and tried to raise her right. After it all comes out that the trash bag is already married, I don’t know how that family will face their friends.
Scott, bless his heart, he is a broken toy. One of the few parts that work won’t see any use now that Lizzie has reformed and won’t sleep with him.
Mama does approve of Clint’s new gf and upcoming marriage. Helpful hint, don’t fund his whims, if he wants to do these crazy things, let him pay for it. Maybe he is still paying off the Little Debbie trailer.
I just came here to say that I’ve migrated away from Bravo channel to the 90 Day seriessss (multiple series and seasons) and now this Love After Lockup and these are the best, most trifling reality shows on TV today. And I LOVE IT.
It breaks my heart the culture we live in where marriage has been made jokes about since the beginning. Always implying it’s hard to be in the husband role, when the wife works just as hard, cooks, cleans, grocery or back to school shops, carpools, event planning, blowjobs it goes on and on. The man? He’s expected to be s man. A good man. Meaning not a bad man. How hard is it?