I’m not particularly in the mood for this tonight, but I need a break from the nerve-wracking election results.
We start with Ashton grumbling about having to go fishing with no sleep particularly since Rhylee is the fisherman and Chandler is the dumbass. Jesus. Chandler doesn’t know a thing about fishing and neither does Ashton. What could possibly go wrong? Good Lord he doesn’t even slow down the boat let alone stop in a cove somewhere. The rods are literally going to fly of the boat. Captain Lee is mad that Chandler didn’t report that they were leaving or where the hell they were going on when they are coming back. Captain Lee is PISSED.
On the lunch outing Chandler is a huge fucknut, again. While the deckhands set up the beach for lunch, the guests are swimming with stingrays and sharks. Caroline continues to complain about her painful foot. It’s getting worse not better. Chef Adrian made a gorgeous sushi lunch.
Back on the big boat, Captain Lee discovers that the Jacuzzi hose was never shut off and the whole crew headed off to the beach. The Jacuzzi “mishap” was totally scripted and even set up with foreshadowing. There has been a lot of that this episode. I’m starting to wonder if Chandler is really this dumb. Then I remember that Caroline really is crazy. And the crazy is getting worse. She bought a burner phone so that people could call her directly and put the number on Twitter. I presume this was to discuss all of the fakery.
In the middle of trying to get the guests back to the boat before the bottom falls out of the sky and quickly trying to pack up, Kate has one thing on her mind. “Where’s the Don Julio?” Too late, Kate. One of the guests already guzzled it.
Caroline freaks out when the guests order drinks from the Jacuzzi. Because Caroline doesn’t know how to make any of the drinks. Production did tell them to make the orders difficult though. One girl ordered water. She should at least be able to pour a glass of water. Super nice Kate is back this episode and it is so much more frightening than evil to your face, Kate.
It’s time for Chandler’s ass whooping, brought to you by CORE water. Chandler acts like he is way too busy to do his job. It seems to interfere with his napping schedule. Since shit rolls downhill, Chandler goes to bitch at the deck crew.
Meanwhile the primary couple has sex in the crow’s nest. And the entire staff that is not sleeping, like Chandler, watches from the security cam. Kate informs us she is not that into it. I told y’all it was a tiny condom. The next morning the guests walk the plank. Not really, but they should have. The phone obsession was driving me crazy.
Captain Lee’s tip meeting is very mild. He barely mentioned communication problems and then said overall it was a decent trip. Really? Did you forget the primary narrative was “shit show” and “Chandler is a fuckwit?” Because I am starting to think Chandler is not going to get demoted this episode.
Chandler starts accusing Rhylee of not doing her job properly. Dude, the reason she has such a smart mouth is because she is doing her job and yours too! How can you be so cranky when you get so many naps each day?
Caroline went to the doctor again and they don’t know what it is but told her to stay off her foot for two days. On Twitter during meltdown 34 subsection P, she said it was necrosis. That pretty much means something is dying and so we’ve come full circle now to “we need a foot amputation, STAT!”
On shore leave, Ashton tries to get Chandler to not be such a dick to Rhylee. He literally says he’s not willing to do that. The van rides back had Rhylee in Ross in one van and the rest of the drunks in the back seat of the other van all together. Rhylee and Ross are the two that get it on in the van? Drunk Ashton goes to Rhylee for a hookup and she turns him down by saying, “I can’t be quiet.”
Caroline is sort of wanting around the boat. I’m not sure if she is drunk or what. It’s hard to tell with her. Kate escorts her to a guest room and tells her not to come out for two days. She gives her an iPad sort of thing she can use if she needs things. She tells her she has two days to get better.
Next week, the deck hands fuck up again and Captain Lee is pissed. Oh and there are CHILDREN on the boat for the first time. That should be interesting.
I thought that Caroline was walking around because her cabin mate was making out with Ashton. Chandler is a complete idiot. How did he ever rise in the ranks to earn his stripes
Kate describing Josiah as a show dog and Caroline a frightened Chihuahua was so true and hysterical. Kept thinking about Steve Irwin and the sting rays. Great recap and episode. Thanks.
I thought all those things too. It kind of worries me when we think alike. 🙂
LOL. I was in Atlanta last weekend. My friend bought a house in Stone Mountain (Gwinnett side?). Lovely brick rancher, nice neighborhood and neighbors. So happy for her.
Chandler is like one of those guys you see in a bar … your eyes lock and you think oo-la-la. Then after two drinks … you realize maybe he’s a bit douchey … and maybe not that bright … The next time you see him, you think, hmmm … I could do worse … then, after only one drink, maybe not. The third time you see him, you think HOW DID I EVER THINK HE WAS CUTE? Nothing kills a lady boner like DUMB and DOUCHEY, except when assholishness and conceit are added to the equation. PUKE!
Straight up.
Preach!
When they are cute and dumb then they are cocker spaniels. When they are cute, dumb and an asshole, they are spayed.
My best moment was when Caroline was lying prostrate on the luxurious guest bed with a call iPad at her disposal and told to rest, and after Kate leaves, Caroline wails about how she is being treated! I laughed my ass off at the absurdity of it.
I almost missed the part where Chandler called Capt. Lee a ****ing asshole! Because HE fucked up. Then, he blames the crew for his lack of management skills. What a ****ing cocksmoker.
Oooooh I like cocksmoker!
Caroline may be an easy target because she’s nervous & high-strung, but she has good reason to be with her family concerns. She seems to be a hard worker who is generally trying despite her painful foot infection. I’m normally a big Kate fan but don’t like her passive-aggressiveness & two-faced behavior with Caroline. She acts very nice in front of her, but immediately mocks her behind her back. Then gives her the guest room but basically threatens her to get better or else! This just reminds me of the way she treated Amy – mean for no reason. At her age & level of experience, it doesn’t say much for her as a person in my opinion.
Come on – Kate is firm but kind to Caroline, which is all she deserves. She has reason to be nervous and high strung, I absolutely feel for her with her mom’s condition. I’ve lost multiple loved ones to various forms of dementia, including Alzheimer’s, and it SUCKS.
But you know what? I still did my job, whatever it was at the time. When I needed to and when it was available, I took leave to take care of shit and made sure my job was covered without a lot of extra work on my co-workers.
But Caroline is not in a job that allows for it.. it is not Kate being mean, it is the reality.
I know when I’m in bad shape physically, I cry. I thought about how I would have brushed Caroline hair from her forehead in an effort to soothe her. But that’s not how Kate operates. She is being very kind in her way towards Caroline and is showing respect, I think. What I didn’t get was Caroline’s talking head. Kate was insisting on the doctor’s orders of 2 days bed rest. She said what anyone would say, if this is really bad, I’d rather save your foot than have the infection worsen because you’re looking all over the ship for some dumbass’ 1 blueberry. Geez, how would Hannah handle this situation? She’d have to do work. Say what you will about Kate but she carries her load unlike Hannah. And I think she’s been empathetic towards Caroline as best as she can.
TBH, my dislike of Caroline wasn’t necessarily that she cried, but what she was crying about – Kate’s “horrible” treatment of her. You would have wanted to brush her hair to soothe her…. when I am sick or upset like that, I would HATE to be touched like that especially by a co worker or boss. So to each her own.
She is blathering on again on twitter this afternoon, trying to come for Captain Lee.
No. Kate is being a bitch. Wtf?!
I don’t think Kate is being a mean girl at all. They have limited crew resources to operate a boat like that. If one isn’t working, the others must pick up the slack. If one of your family members is desperately ill, perhaps you shouldn’t be on boat in one of the most remote areas if the world.
I don’t think Caroline’s issues are related to her mom, at least not directly. She reminds me of my kid who has ADD when she’s off her meds. All over the damn place and barely able to function. Caroline constantly loses focus on the job at hand, is very easily distracted, and gets super worked up about the littlest things. And her twitter rants are just completely immature displays of her lack of impulse control. Now Kate certainly isn’t helping with her two-faced, backhanded ‘help’. It’s obvious that she doesn’t really believe anything is wrong with Caroline and she makes sure Caroline knows it.
Ha! Kate’s MO has always been passive-aggressive and a bit two-faced and I still prefer her way more than Hannah.
I think Caroline was really exaggerating how bad her foot was and Kate was on to her. She was hoping that she’d be able to go to bed and rest and there’d be no consequences. That’s why she came back from the last doctor’s visit and said she had to stay off your foot for 2 days. I noticed there were times when she looked like she was walking normally, barely any sign of a limp or any discomfort. It seems to me that if your foot was that infected you wouldn’t be able to put any weight on it. Maybe I’m just being cynical. That’s why I think Kate acted the way she did and just had Caroline sit on a stool. When she basically told Caroline to get better or go home I think Caroline realized that her little scheme wasn’t working and it pissed her off.
Chandler is pathetic. He really doesn’t get what he’s doing wrong and I thought he actually looked rather puzzled when Captain Lee was reaming him a new one.
The guests on this charter drove me crazy. Their lack of response when Ashton came out dressed as an Islander was downright rude. There’s something wrong with them – it’s like that movie where everyone is replaced by pod people. I hope they’re not an indication of what the future holds.
I loved the final statement from the guest, “you’ll need to charge your phone” as they were stepping off the boat. I would have thrown mine overboard for a 3 day cruise like they had – and the only time I’d want it back was to snap a photo of Tahitian Ashton.
Well, to be fair….They should charge her phone because they need to film the ride home!
And the person handling their luggage. All special moments you want to keep forever. ?
Caroline says back in the states it was diagnosed as neuropathy. That is a very painful condition.
Given TT’s reports on Caroline’s twitter lunacy, I assume she will be put off the boat. She was not cut out for this job — multitasking overwhelms her. I understand that she is worried about her mom, but in actuality, isn’t filming over six weeks or something? I think she could push through it if she didn’t have such emotional problems herself.
Hated these guests. What awful people.
Is Chandler really as delusional as he appears? No self awareness?
The reunion should be interesting.
I gotta read these tweets
I want to see those tweets too. As for Caroline, you know why she was hired by Bravo. They have to have someone who is batshit crazy for ratings. And if they aren’t crazy enough there is always editing to make it appear so.
Some reality people just really make me irrationally mad. Chandler is one.
I want to punch him int he face. He is such an asshole.
And Rhylee wasn’t being annoying at all, but he still treated her as if all HIS mistakes were hers.
And when he kept telling her to put her stuff away he somehow couldn’t hear her that she did put her stuff away.
Even Lee said We have an experienced fisherman on the boat.
He can’t even set a schedule! I wish they kept talking crap about him while he was trying to sleep.
I was just reading some of Caroline’s tweets. She claims she had neuropathy. Which is nerve damage usually caused by underlying health issues such as diabetes. This I know because I have a couple of friends and family that are diabetic. There are other reasons for neuropathy but it’s generally associated with diabetes. JS love it or hate it I think she’s a complete whack-a-do.
I have peripheral neuropathy which is not only hereditary but very painful and not related to diabetes at all. Mine is much worse in my right foot than my left. So while I’m not a Caroline fan, this is actually pretty possible.
I said it was related to other underlying health issues such as diabetes. I was just trying to give examples not limiting the causes. I apologize that you took it that way. It wasn’t my intention
I have had neuropathy in my foot as well, literally feels like a nail going through my foot. It is INTENSE, it comes and goes randomly and when it comes, I HAVE to sit down (or fall over) and massage it until it passes. If she has that, then she should probably go home if she cannot control it. I dont think she is faking it (even if she is nuts).
neuropathy can also be caused by infection, like say, from a bug bite in Tahiti. I do not doubt her illness for a minute. She is a bit scattered and batshit crazy but she was doing just fine until she because sick.
Well up until now I did feel bad for Caroline and thought her quirks were endearing. This episode she finally got on my nerves with her ailments that seemed touch and go at best. Ashton also struck a nerve being a tattletale. Rhylee was simply conveying what everyone else was thinking and Ashton chooses to say something during a douche is drinking?!? That could’ve gone no bueno AGAIN. Adrian asking if Kate wanted a breast massage made me squirm cause he’s kinda creepy but then I felt bad cause he’s so sweet ???♀️ All I kept thinking was can you imagine marrying chandler? How awful that would be? He would have you up Saturday morning mowing and the kids pulling weeds and push ups when they’re in trouble. He really triggers me ??
Adrian is sweet?? How is asking a colleage/boss if you can massage her breasts ever acceptable? Isnt that sexual harassment?! metoo moment?? Lol
Yes I find him extremely sweet. He obviously felt comfortable enough to joke with Kate in that way, which was taken as such. The guy has some creepy vibes and I attribute that to me not being a yoga, no worries kinda gal. Other than that, he is harmless. If anyone on the history of this show would have a METOO story/ complaint you can bet Kate would speak up. She was not bothered or else I would understand your fuss.
Hey, you big load of floozies, I have a Desperate But Specific Need, and I’m sure Tamara won’t mind my treating her site like a FrauFunding platform and asking you broads to make it happen. Accordingly, to wit, e.g, wherein and whereof, because of my woe-is-me-autoimmune-blah-blah-pain-marcia-marcia-marcia-rhubarb-turtle-time-pathos, I require someone with the requisite wherewithal to bend the framework of space/time/production and whip me up 13 sixty-minute episodes of a Below Deck/Haunting of Hill House smash-up mini-series, with Kate and Josiah as the Dudleys, this week’s primary as the Bent-Neck Lady, Chandler as the thing trying unsuccessfully to claw its way out of the basement, Caroline as the Decomposing Flapper, and Captain Lee as some kind of hybrid exorcist/ship’s-captain/masseur. I’d like that with the sauce on the side, and I’ll start with a supersized Grey Goose & Humira on ice with a laudanum chaser in a vintage Miami Vice Commemorative maxi-tumbler lightly frosted. I also want to look and sound like Lauren Bacall at 19 for the rest of the day. I’d like to thank everyone at the Make-A-Bitch foundation for helping to get me in the mood I’m in today. You’re all a pack of cards and psychedelic bohemians, and I love most of you some of the time.
You are Everything! ??♀️??♀️??♀️
Clearly, Chandler has zero people skills. But in addition to that I think he’s channeling his dad’s way of operating. Forgetting, of course, that his dad is a captain with ultimate authority and Chandler hasn’t reached the status where somebody else can knock him down a peg (Captain Lee). Kate is a better Chief Stew than Hannah, but that’s not a very high bar. I think she’d be a great Chief Stew if she didn’t instigate the cliques that are really only forgivable in little girls. She creates division in a work place that relies on cooperation to work well.
I dont want Chandler fired. I want him demoted so he has to do some work and stay awake past 9:30. He would have to take orders from Ross, and Rhylee could go to bed and leave him the evening rounds.
High five ✋?
And a double high-five!
I think it might happen,
And a double high-five!
I think it might happen next week.
Now that, would be worth watching. I was actually disappointed in Captain Lee for the first time. Couldn’t wait for commercial break to end just to see him unload a giant can of whoop ass on Chandler after he left no deck crew member back on the boat. What was that, the third of fourth time Chandler messed up? (switching deck crew to a different frequency, taking the guests out fishing without alerting the Captain, I lost track at this point). I’d have stripped him of those Bosun stripes and walked them straight down to Ross.
Yessss to this comment. I can’t wait to hear Ross in his kiwi accent order the ‘dick’ crew to clean the ‘dick’. ? let Ross be promoted ASAP!!!
I don’t know who does the hiring / casting for the stews. After working in bars for years, I have had to answer questions about making drinks. Anyone on a yacht in a tropical location should know how to make a piña colada. Between Caroline not knowing how to make one and the Below Deck bleached blond not knowing how to make a Bloody Mary, someone is doing a SHITTY JOB HIRING. The berry and mint is basically a garnish and she could have made the other drinks, and while she was delivering them, explained that the berries were frozen — asking him if he wanted them if they weren’t fresh. That would have enabled her to buy some time to get the berries but get the others their drinks. Caroline should have put her social media skills toward something beneficial and googled piña colada. At the very least, there could be a cocktail guide at the bar station — just in case the guests use up all the bandwidth ?
You just made me envision below deck with a dorm mom and you are hired! ?? show em how it’s done Nanette!
Nanette As a person who has worked in the restaurant industry for 15 years I see where you are coming from. But how entertaining would it be if everyone could do their job? I think they hire people purposely who aren’t up to the task along with people who lie on their resume. I would be shocked if they actually hired some of the people from Below Deck on non televised yachts.
This! It is a TV show and Kate needs someone to be a bitch to. And the crappy Bosun storyline replays almost every season.
???the crappy Bosun! So fucking true. They need to redo the opening credits like the Love Boat: the Crappy Bosun, The Bitchy Stew, the Hapless Stew, the Better-than-the-Bosun Deckhand, and the Blackmailed by the Bitchy Stew Captain.
This is an awesome idea.
??
Used condoms, sex in the crow’s nest, and the phones. What a bunch.