This has been a great season and I am truly shocked that everyone stayed together at the end. I thought Tristan would surely bail when he found out he married a psycho stalker. I mean nothing makes better reality TV than the wife getting pulled off the plane and being arrested when she is en route to her honeymoon.
Sadly, even though this show has a small group of followers here, it’s still a big site and a lot of shitheads show up to inform us how things end as if the have just discovered Google and we don’t have it yet. I came really close to being unspoiled this season. SO VERY CLOSE. Let’s check in and see who is still together. I am starting this recap at two a.m. just to avoid some new idiots from weighing in before I can see the show.
Up first, Tristan and Mia. Tristan is just cute as a button. Tristan said there was no middle ground in his marriage. Everything was either fantastic or miserable. Then Doctor Cal said when he first met Tristan he didn’t like him but after getting to know him he found he was a great guy,
Oh y’all this is news to me. Mia bailed right after the decision day filming. As the host said, “So the TV show is over, I’m out?” Tristan said he was going through his social media and she saw him looking at a video one of his exes posted and she got jealous and took off.
Tristan goes off stage and Mia comes out. In her version of events, Mia said when the cameras and counselors left it was like having training wheels taken of her bike. She was left to drive herself and drove herself into a ditch. Mia says it was the very next day after filming (perhaps I misunderstood Tristan) Tristan was showing her pictures of his ex-girlfriend and was talking her up. The host says so he was just like, “Check out my ex-girlfriend?” She says yes. He showed her pictures of his ex in a bikini. I am not believing Mia because she is a lying liar who lies and it doesn’t look like the therapists are either. Then she says three days later his mom called her and told her and the sound went out. Sorry. When I have to tape ten or so shows in one night the late night shows have a lot of hiccups. Hopefully, when they bring Tristan out I will be able to figure out what she said, but watching with intermittent sound, the counselors don’t appear to be buying what she is selling. I think that is why the host mentioned the possibility that Mia was done right after the show.
When Tristan comes out, they ask him right off if they are still together. He says they are divorced. They asked who initiated the divorce. He says he did, because “after the last walkout, he could not bet his future on an unstable woman.” Mia disagrees. She says she initiated the divorce. She says after the last blowup they tried counseling and she drove to Houston. She makes it seem like driving three hours to try to save her marriage is some big commitment. Then he said he wanted a divorce, I believe the implication is either she drove down for nothing, or he said that during the counseling. Mia is claiming she filed but the spoiler assholes have said that he filed.
And just like that we move on to Dave and Amber.
Oh wow! In the flashback scenes we flash back to SCENES THEY DIDN’T SHOW US but were in the promos. Like Dave saying if he would have known that Amber was the girl that one of his friends at the gym had dated and apparently said negative things about, he would have dropped out of the show.
Amber comes out with brown hair and either no extensions or she got her fried ends cut off. She is much prettier as a brunette. Amber says that he was really upset with her because someone he knew for a couple of years had slept with/ dated her. Dr. Pepper knew all about this and kept trying to tell them to change gyms. It was Amber who didn’t want to change gyms. Amber says she moved out because he was unhappy about the gym situation? Is that what she said? Did she choose a gym over her husband? It’s late and I really don’t follow this conversation at all. Pastor Cal says moving out should not be an option when you are married.
Dave comes out with his side of the story. Dave said the cameras and the experts were his safety net and when that left, they lost their way. Dave’s version of the story is that he went golfing one day and came home and Amber had moved out. There was no conversation and he had no idea she was leaving him.
When Amber comes out again, she says she probably would not have moved out if the cameras and experts were not there. She says they gave her accountability for her actions. It sounds like she really regrets leaving. Dave says that while she did tell him it was a mistake to move out, they are not going to just move right back in together. That was a pretty big thing she did.
Dave says they are still married, at least legally. Amber really wants another chance and has accepted all the responsibility for their separation. Dave says that he doesn’t really see a future with Amber. They both say they still “have love for each other.” I sort of want them to work it out. But it seems that they will not.
On to Danielle and Bobby.
Danielle is out first. Everything is perfect. Gag me with a spoon. Bobby comes out and gushes over Danielle. The experts gush over this couple. Their entire segment was like two minutes. Because lack of conflict makes for boring TV.
The Reunion of All Three Couples
Everyone gets together and the other two couples all secretly want to poke out Danielle and Bobby’s eyes with sporks. The host asks Mia how she is dealing with her mugshot being all over the Internet. She jokes, “If I’d known I would have worn more makeup.” She says the charges were dropped. That is true, but they were dropped because the state of Louisiana did not want to pay the costs involved with extraditing her from Texas. I think Tristan decided to file for divorce when the mugshot hit the Internet. She was never really truthful with him about what she did and he gave her the benefit of the doubt and begged her to come clean and she still liked to him.
Dave reiterates in front of the group that he feels divorce is the best thing for them. He feels bad that Amber feels like she failed in the marriage, but he thinks divorce is the way to go. BUT SHE DYED HER HAIR FOR YOU, DAVE! lol. kidding. I agree with Dave and is crazy socks. Amber says the moment Dave realized that his friend had dated her previously, that was the beginning of the end. The experts suggest two months of therapy to try to get past it. Dave says no. Dr Pepper says that he needs to consider that everyone has a past and that was then and this was now. She suggests that he may be overly concerned with that situation. Dave feels attacked and says he put everything into this and it did not work out. He said he did his best to move on. He’s pissed by Dr, Pepper questioning why Amber dating someone he was friends with before they met was such a big deal to him.
The host asks who would still have been married at first sight knowing what they know now. Everyone except Mia and Amber raise their hands. They both said it was a lot more difficult and emotional and having it all out there for the world to see. The host asks about fans and Amber says she doesn’t have any but the blond therapist raises her hand. I can’t imagine the social media crap that Amber gets. Or Mia.
Tristan has said he was bashed for colorism. I don’t even recall this in his piece at all, but I don’t pay attention to the interviews at all until they pick the finalists. They show Tristan saying he didn’t want to date/marry anyone darker than him. He said so many people judged him and attacked his family. I try not to follow these people on social media to avoid being spoiled. Tristan tears up talking about the attacks on his family. I totally get this. It’s happened to me and literally all I did was have surgery. There are scummy people on social media who don’t like YOU but decide to bring your whole family into shit. It’s insane.
Tristan says he is not a colorist, he’s not a racist,he doesn’t hate himself, he doesn’t hate his family, he loves his family (that is another thing with trolls the suggest that you hate your family or your family hates you? What the hell is that about? Do they not have families or even know how they work? ) Tristan cries. Dude. THERE IS NO CRYING IN SOCIAL MEDIA! Block and move on! They are idiots that do not know you. You know your family and they don’t.
And finally, the big announcement that several fucktards decided to send me and are now blocked from emailing me. Bobby and Danielle are having a baby. Everyone pretends to be shocked and happy but Amber wants a baby so bad she can hardly stand it. I’m sure that will happen for her. I kind of feel bad that even with her natural hair color Dave is not reconsidering. I feel like they made it through some hard stuff an should stay married.
They announce Married at first sight, happily ever after with Bobby and Danielle (barf) Shawniece and Jephte (YES! they just had their kid) and Ashley and Anthony (meh.). Tonight that Honeymoon Island thing started. I will probably recap it on the weekends when I feel like it, kind of like Teen Mom.
Thanks for watching this show with me you guys!