I’m really not sure why I recap this show especially because Friday Night and Saturday I try not to post at all unless something drastic is going on. Every girl needs her down time. Yet I am kind of afraid I will miss Kim Richards doing something bizarre for one, and also, I really need to feel like some of y’all are actually watching this train wreck with me even though my stats say I could totally not recap this show and it would have ZERO effect on my stats.
But tonight’s episode says that Kim gives a “shocking sex confession!” and I mean who doesn’t want to visualize Kim Richards having sex. Um, so perhaps no one will read this either. I’m going to pretend like there are tons of you reading these recaps and I’m not literally typing to myself.
Anyway, it’s the sex episode and thank the baby Jesus they are not doing the stoopid puppet thing this season. At least it doesn’t look like it. If there is any good that has come to my life from watching this stupid shit is I love Puma. I have no idea WTF he is famous for but he is adorable and I hope he is making tons of money doing whatever it is. He makes me happy. Quani needs to gather herself and realize he seems like a good dude.
I don’t care about the Bachelor guy calling Judge Toler “girl” something. Judge Toler has lost all credibility on this show. Ivy league degree or not. Don’t get me wrong, the bachelor couple is still ridiculous, but so is Judge Toler, sadly.
Ernest is looking a lot healthier, and I wish the best for him. Mamma Dee is another who needs to wake up and see what she has.
It’s Truth or Dare time and Kim doesn’t want to play. Paulie D and Aubrey are very frisky in this game. Why? Puma and I are both traumatized by Mamma Dee and Ernest’s contributions to this game. I’ll spare you. The Bachelor couple is predictably boring. She says she would like dirty talk in bed. He says she is not telling the truth. Is this their first fight? Kim has to fake an orgasm. Puma jokes that it turned him on. Everyone seemed to believe Kim’s acting. Except me. Quani and Puma fight about sex.
Next there is the wheel of sexual positions that they have to act out (clothed of course). They have to answer questions while in the pose. Once again, me and Puma are traumatized. Full disclosure, I am not really sure who is Puma and who is Quani but I think I have it right now, or not. Who cares, no one reads this recap, right? Whichever one is the dude, that’s the one I like.
Oh Quani is the female and having a fit about Puma saying she is always tired. She says it is the birth control. They have had sex four out of the six days they have been in this house because she is away from her kids and able to focus on him. Puma just wants love.
It’s time for Kim and Wynn. I think Kim has it in her contract that she doesn’t sleep in the same bed with him or sit with him on a couch. They are always in separate chairs and technically their bed has two twin mattresses on top. Does she have a real boyfriend? I doubt it, but this could have been the reason I suppose.
AND HERE IT IS! KIM’S BIG SEX CONFESSION!
She can’t remember the last time she had sex. I believe this. And she is not romantically involved with Wynn.
This is such a ridiculous episode. Judge Toler punished my boy, Puma with duct tape over his mouth. Quani tells him he needs to support her, find a new birth control(??) and something else I’ve already forgotten and he has too.
Next Week: This gets “more stupider” As my elementary school girls would say on the playground. “Girls go to college to get more knowledge, boys go to Jupiter to get more stupider.” I never corrected the grammar, because right is right. And plus they had not been to college yet.