Hagood and Catherine head to Wormsloe Plantation to use as a backdrop for Catherine’s portrait. It’s a beautiful place but one usually waits to do a portrait when one is married, though parents often have them done as a young child. This is an awkward time for Catherine’s portrait. Also, it’s 2018 and the common procedure now, is not to sit outside below the gnat line and paint a portrait al fresco but to stage the scene and snap a photo or six to work from. Whatever.
I had forgotten that Lyle and Hagood’s boyfriend are best friends and she is closer to Lyle than Catherine. Catherine will lose all of her friends in this split.
Louis’s sock line may not be as dumb as I thought. He’s doing a photo shoot for the line and he is targeting the golf market for his sock collection. This is really smart. Especially in the south. And he is going to the PGA trade show in Orlando with his socks. I’m starting to think Louis may be being “Craiged” by production.
Hannah and Catherine meet up for drinks and apps at a fancy brand new restaurant in Savannah, The 1540 room. They are both talking about how bruised up they are from paintball to break the ice since things are tense with these two. Hannah knows Catherine is with some other guy and Catherine refuses to acknowledge it on camera. Hannah has a lot of hardware on ring finger. I can’t get a good shot of it, and I know it’s not a wedding set, but it looks a bit similar. Hannah holds Catherine’s feet to the fire. Catherine is sort of admitting it. Then she says that she wants to ultimately end up with Lyle.
I feel like Daniel takes five showers a year and all of them are on camera. Daniel seems to be totally over working. I’m not sure if these alleged meetings are for the law firm or his call center but he doesn’t seem invested in whatever it is. I grew up with the expectation of being a housewife. Then I quickly discovered that I have serious issues with maintaining relationships with anyone and had no idea what I was supposed to do. I feel like Daniel is in the same situation, his family has certain expectations about what he is supposed to do and he’s just over it.
As it turns out, Hagood did take some photos and is working on the painting at her studio. She also has an appointment with a sake expert to discuss her product because her mother wants her to get some more criticism. Southern moms are tough.
Catherine and Louis talk at his office. Catherine says that she told Hannah that there is no way that Louis is going to propose in a year. The thing is, producers try to force people to get married on the show. Louis says that he doesn’t have $40K for a ring. If a twenty something proposed to me with a $40K ring, hell if an 80 something proposed to me with a $40K ring I’d want nothing to do with them. I’m all about being financially prudent. I put off buying mayonnaise until it is on sale and then I buy a couple. There are so many more things I want to spend my money on than jewelry and the grocery store.
One thing worth the money is Catherine’s mother’s cheese straws. I’d pay big bucks for that. I can make them, but they are not as good when you participate and understand how the sausage is made. Cheese straws are AH MAZING. Right up there with sausage balls! And Catherine’s mom brought over silver serving trays and cheese straws for her housewarming party. Oh God. There will be tomato pies. I didn’t make one this summer. Perhaps I should try to get to the farmers market tomorrow or maybe I could use all my end of the season orange pear tomatoes. I’ve let my garden go to shit and need to harvest all my peppers.
Hagood meets with the Savannah sake professional. I could almost guarantee you there is not Savannah sake professional. This is some random dude production found to promote the restaurant. There is nothing Asian about it. It’s an old southern gas station. He is a sommelier but sake is not wine. He tells her she needs to spend a year living in Japan. She is in a position similar to mine. I had parents in poor health during my twenties and thirties and getting away was a hard. This is one of the issues that women today having babies in their 40s don’t understand. It impairs their young adulthood.
Catherine has invited Ashley to her housewarming party. Louis is on the way to Orlando and can’t make it. Lyle is skipping it because he wants to.
Daniel arrives looking more ridiculous than usual. He got a blow out and a trip and is wearing some ridiculous plaid jacket. It’s beyond words.
Ashley makes her grand entrance and Brandon greets her with a big hug while everyone else has a constipated face. Ashley could have used a bit of help with her look, and hair and makeup.
After Brandon declares his undying love for Kaitlyn Jenner, a conversation begins between Brandon, Hagood and Ashley about how to navigate life when living your truth could hurt those around you. Hagood struggles with the fact that she wants to live in Japan and learn about sake and the fact that her daddy is having serious health issues. Been there, done that. I think she will regret her decision either way.
Catherine and Lyle meet for dinner the next day. Catherine is a cunt and says that Lyle plays the victim card and that he has never said he was sorry to her ever. Lyle says he needs space and perhaps this is where they part ways. Catherine leaves.
Next week: The crew goes to Turks and Caicos. I am so here for that! Brandon tells Lyle that he is extremely abusive to Catherine next week. Clearly, he found some crack in the Turks because nothing could be farther from the truth. Lyle is a total pussy. Hannah calls Louis immature and Louis tells Hannah she is asexual.